Nerf master in Equestria!

by CyberCommand

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Random, Human
Length: 1446

"A man high on a combination of coca cola and cheerios finds himself in Equestria,he doesn't know how or why but one thing is certain, he isn't defenseless. Armed with a mass array of Nerf guns he takes to the town of Ponyville with on

"A man high on a combination of coca cola and cheerios finds himself in Equestria, he doesn't know how or why but one thing is certain, he isn't defenseless. Armed with a mass array of Nerf guns he takes to the town of Ponyville with one thing and one thing only on his mind.
Total, Nerf, War.
Can the ponies deal with this stage creature and his endless supply of darts? Will Lyra stop frothing at the mouth at the sight of the human? And why does Pinkie Pie own a nerf mini gun?"

With special guest star MR101 and Berry punch Donald Trump

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-04-19 00:46:22 UTC

Nerfmania

*Munch munch munch* "This is the best breakfast ever!!" *Boom* *Snap crackle Pop Rice krispies*

On day a Man was enjoying his breakfast. It was  coca cola  with a very special ingredient along with the best box of cheerios you could ever hope for. On his Table was a Golden Maverick that he stole from Kim jung un's private weapons cache.

He then finished his breakfast and got up and looked at the wall admiring all the golden weapons he had.

The Nite finder from Saddam, the Jolt from Hitler and most of all his prized Possession of his golden guns the Centurion from Reagan. (Of course he had all the other Nerf weapons but, he just had some crack and i don't think he wants to show them all to you.)

Life was good for the Nerf master. This all changed when *Boom* it just changed Like he just Vanished into thin air.

Hey Narrator thats bullshit i don't just vanish into thin air!

Fine then how do you want to leave earth?

 Any way  but that way

Then how about this.

*knock Knock*

"Who could that be?" the master thought as he got up to answer the door.

At the door was Donald trump. he had the body of a human with the head of a bigot

This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill  the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill  you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes. Remember, all I'm offering is the truth nothing more.

The master looked at the two pills the red then the blue and back at the red one and finally makes his choice.

Our hero  takes both  pills by the hand, lays them on  Kitchen  table, takes out his Nerf knife cuts them both open and snorts them both up his nose with a straw

"You have chosen wisely" says trump as he starts to look more and more like Barack Obama and you start asking yourself since when is your house filled with Rainbow balls?

The master looks down and is falling into a continues void until he falls right into the ground and blacks out.

When he wakes up he is in the middle of the desert  striped of everything but his underwear. Our  hero gets up and trys to remember what happened.He slowly remembers the events of  the morning.  He woke up, ate his breakfast And was about to chuck a boot of cola when Donald came to the door. Now he remembered every thing but this puzzled him as he remembered bringing his arsenal of weapons and millions of dollars worth of coke he stepped in a puddle of coke and decided to follow the trail.

Our hero is licking the trail and still flowing it

The master has resorted to drinking his own piss as seen on TV in this desolate wast land even eating the dirt

Finally as he was on the brink of death he crawls up straight into a fountain  the master was now barely recognizable as a human and more like a primitive ape  he drinks the water little does he know that he is in the middle of pony vile square With all the ponies in the town gathered for a town meeting

One of those ponies a lavender unicorn comes up and noticed the strange creature and asks " Hello are you OK?"

Our hero just looks at her and says "IVE BEEN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DESERT FOR 30 DAYS WITH NOTHING BUT DRIPS OF COLA MY OWN PIS AND MUD TO EAT AND YOUR ASKING IF IM OK? WHAT DO YOU THINK?" He then collapses on the ground.

This time a timid yellow coated Pegasus named  Flutershy reacts by dragging him to her cottage and takes care of him and gives him cloths and alot of stuff bullshit that you don't relay need to know because plot is stupid im just trying to get to the fun part

Our hero wake up in town square armed to the teeth with the 2 Nerf Vulcans giving him the power to fly  and ever single Nerf gun imaginable.

he is then hit in the head by an Apple. He picks it up and eats it and a flashback ensues where it is revealed that berry punch came in and stole all the cola.  Now armed with he information that Berry punch was the one who took his cola and that Trump just tricked him into making this big Fest. The anger inside the Nerf master causes his face to turn red with blood he is angry oh yes he is angry.

A certain mint colored unicorn named Lyra just so happened to be walking by when she noticed this bipedal being in front of the mare. She  was filled with excitement and said "HUMANS I KNEW THEY WERE REAL" she then frothed  at the mouth clinging to his back totally loyal to the Master he is Unstoppable.

Just as he is about to attack every pony in  equestria. Along comes a tall white horse with flowing hair. The master dose not care for princess celestia  and cocks his gun and dose a line of coke. Pinkie pie bounces out of nowhere and cocks here Nerf minigun "WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?" the master exclaims as this is one prize he wants to add to his collection.  pinkie pie giggles ignoring his question. Our hero says this " LET US LAY DOWN THE GOUND RULES No touching of the Hair or Face" everypony nods in agreement

3...2...1... FIGHT! Our hero is shooting every pony left, right up, down,  nailing ponies in the legs as well as taking some hits him self other ponies prefer the Nerf swords to block the darts  and all the ponies start to converge on his position Lyra, Berry and Turmp have made an agreement with the master for an alliance in exchange for some of that Delicious cola, coke and cheerios also to also make Equestira  great again.  they haul ass to twilight's library.

Spike was napping when our hero and his gang burst through the door. Spike being spike did absolutely nothing and is never heard from again.  They set up and barricade the  entire library. The master hits the secret button of convenience turning all the bookcase shelves around to revel a cache of weapons and ammo along with nerf knockoffs.   lyra  is using the nerf longshot up on the second floor and berry is with Trump on the first floor holding ponies off with the stampedes small million round drum mags. Our hero Puts on his armor made of purely nerf guns and opens fire  hitting and nerfing hundreds of ponies like the zombie hoard that they are becoming  but the still keep coming

after 5 mins he is out of ammo but remembers the ammo cache and refills

But 5 mins latter that ammo also runs out  except for whats left in his golden maverick.  lyra and trump with berry punch move onto  of the library in the tree with the nerf master.  Pegesi are coming up only to be shot with the Nerf masters  customized big Nerf bow that he seemingly pulls out of his ass

" WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO! " Lyra Exclaims in a panic. The master undetermined to admit defeat looks the whole group in the eye and says "I have a plan"  He then looks more toward berry punch and says  "still got that cola berry?"  berry replies  "YEP "  The gather around drink as much as they can and then the master pulls out the Nerf nuke and puts in the code  1 2 3 4 5  Trump says "Dam thats the same code i put on my luggage" The master ignores him as the a loud crash is heard. " The have broken through grab onto my wings!" The master

gave these instructions, the other pony's and the other human climbed onto his wings and he blast a hole though the roof with he last shot he had and just in the nick of time as all of the ponies make it to where he was but now hear a beeping sound  they look down ans see a device looked like it was made with cheap plastic, cardboard and a digital clock with the number  10 wait now its 9 nope 8.. 6 " wait what happened to 7?" one of the background pony's  ask all the the digital clock dose is flash the words "JUST KIDDING" across the screen now it continued its countdown to 1 and then ......

What happens next? you decide put your opinion in the comments section below!