Trixie, The Great and Powerful Meister

by Jet Edge

Rating: teen
Tags: Crossover, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Trixie, Comedy
Length: 3878

After being defeated by Twilight Sparkle, Trixie is fed up with losing, so she decides to go into an alternate dimension, which was Death City, where she recruited the help of Excalibur to show Twilight up, but will her decision be a mistake?

Trixie, a great magician, still number two to Twilight Sparkle, her Arch-Nemesis. She is defeated by Twilight in their latest duel, so she recruits the help of Excalibur, one of the most powerful weapons in all the multiverse to show her nemesis up. She arrives at Death City and soon realizes that this may be a mistake. Now they're back in Equestria together, and she must make the best of this annoying situation.

Rated Teen for a couple violent themes.

Published 2013-04-22 04:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-08-09 06:17:07 UTC

Trixie's Plan For Revenge

You all may not know this, but in Equestria, there are certain areas of the land that, when visited at the right moment, can open a portal to other dimensions. These may be dimensions of pain and fury, or they may be dimensions of marshmallows and bunnies. Whatever the case, some abuse these portals. These portals are usually not interacted with amongst the creatures who inhabit the land, but some take that challenge, whether it be from curiosity or rage; The usual creatures who take advantage of these are the unicorns, more specifically powerful unicorns, ones with vast amounts of knowledge. This is mainly due to the fact that the more spells you know, the more of a chance you have of knowing a spell to hold them open for longer. Most who do take advantage of this however, usually do not return, be it from comfort in the new world, or... other causes.

Trixie was the first in a while to try and seek out one of these portals, having lost her recent duel with Twilight, she felt she needed revenge. She set out to find all the knowledge she possibly could to be able to beat her arch-nemesis, searching high and low for spells required to hold the portals open. She had searched through all sorts of spell books, no matter how basic or advanced the spell may be, if it could help, she wanted to know it. Every spell book she looked through however, didn’t contain a single spell to help. She just sat there in the forest with spell books piled high all around her, just thinking. What book has she not read yet?

That’s when she remembered, as if from some sort of miracle. The Alicorn Amulet, it had corrupted her to the point of being drunk with power. When she took the amulet off, some of those spells she remembered, mostly ones she thought were utterly useless like making a pony glow, or being able to jump like you're on the moon. She thought hard, almost painstakingly hard, she knew there was a spell like that in her memory, but what was it? She just sat there, thinking, and thinking, and thinking! Not a single thing came to mind except, a book! A book she had noticed in Twilight’s house while Trixie sent her into exile, it was real old, so old that even so much as touching it could possibly make it crumble to dust.

This book was in a glass container in the main book room of Twilight’s home, her private collection. She tried to remember the name of the book, ‘Book of Ancient Spells and Rituals,’ if she remembered correctly. After coming to that conclusion, she thought of what to do next. Should she go to Twilight’s house and ask to borrow it? No, no, that wouldn’t work, especially since Trixie had been so mean to Twilight, why would she ever let Trixie borrow that book? Maybe try to find it elsewhere? That couldn’t work, she hasn’t seen a book like that anywhere else, for all she knows that could be the only remaining copy in all of Equestria.

That’s when it hit her, She’ll go sneak into Twilight’s study and take the book while she was sleeping. Trixie congratulated herself, levitating a small bit of foliage to pat herself on the back with, smiling and saying to herself, “Yes, yes, The Great and Powerful Trixie is brilliant!”

She continued to stroke her own ego until she remembered there was nopony there to show off to. After she had finished congratulating herself on that brilliant idea, she decided to go to sleep so she would have more energy that night for the mission. She went to some trees and collected some branches for a tent, some leaves for a bedding, and a really big leaf for a blanket. It took her a few minutes to fall asleep because of the sunlight, so she had used a few more big leaves on the tent to keep all the sunlight out. She fell asleep with a wide grin on her face, almost chuckling at the thought of being able to keep the portals open and find something powerful enough to defeat Twilight with.

She had awoken later that night with no memory of what she had dreamed, probably from all the excitement. She had snuck over to Ponyville, seeing no life forms whatsoever on the way there; It didn’t surprise her as it was almost midnight. She passed some of the more well known places in the small town like Sugarcube Corner and the spa, not making a peep for fear of alerting anything, even the smallest fly she didn’t want to alert.

When she arrived at the library, she thought that the front door was too obvious, so she used some of her magic to create a walkway up to one of the windows. She opened up the window and quietly snuck inside. Upon entering, she noticed Spike in his little bed, bundled up with a happy smile on his face. Trixie had snuck over into the main study, hiding behind anything she could find as an extra precaution. She entered the study and noticed the glass case which excited her immensely, but there was a problem. Twilight was right next to the case, reading a book and writing something down. She just sat there, writing and writing for about ten minutes, but to Trixie it felt more like an eternity! A low grumbling was heard from Trixie’s stomach which Twilight heard. This panicked Trixie, did Twilight already catch on to the intruder in her house?

“Oh, darn it!” Trixie whispered to herself, then took out some apple slices she carried with her for emergencies. She quietly ate the apples, using her cape to muffle the crunches of the crisp, juicy slices. Twilight just shrugged the noise off and went back to her studies for about five minutes before she realized she was also really hungry. She decided to go get a bit of food for a late night snack which she didn’t normally do, but the battle with Trixie earlier that day caused her to skip dinner. She just wasn’t all that hungry after their duel.

When Twilight left her spot, Trixie quickly zoomed over to the glass case which held two books, both were conveniently helpful from the titles. The first was the book she came here for, but the second was entitled, ‘Alternate Dimensions and Their Legends.’ She grabbed both of these books and replaced them quickly with two other, random books which she didn’t have time to read. She just grabbed two books off of a shelf and stuck them in the glass case, closed it, and went back to a safe distance. She saw Twilight come back about ten seconds after Trixie obtained the books, a close call for the young sorcerer. Trixie decided it best to catch her breath for a second, then leave, so she sat there, watching Twilight for about a minute and snuck back out of the home. As she left, Spike yawned and stretched his arms and legs out, which alarmed Trixie, but he just rolled over in his bed. Trixie let out a quiet sigh of relief, and snuck back out of the window, making sure to close it behind her.

Trixie backtracked through the town, still being as quiet as a mouse, until she reached the Everfree Forest again. She galloped to her little camp site and busted open one of the books, she felt it necessary to read ‘Alternate Dimensions and Their Legends’ first, so she opened it up and started reading random pieces of facts. The one that peeked her interest the most was entitled, ‘Death City, Nevada.’ She read this article which led to a sub article with a picture provided. The sub article was entitled, ‘Excalibur.’ She read it aloud to herself.

“Not much in Equestria is known about Excalibur, but legend has it that he can change forms from a little indistinguishable life form, to a powerful, lightweight, sharp sword that can cut through anything, even magic.”

She thought about this for a second, she never really wanted to kill Twilight, but instead wanted to be the most powerful unicorn in all of Equestria. She decided that she wanted Excalibur, not only for a lackey, but also to threaten Twilight to cut all ties to anypony she knows, especially Princess Celestia. She got an evil grin on her face from this thought, having a devious chuckle become an outright evil cackle. She just loved this thought, she knew that this was what would bring Twilight Sparkle to her knees, grovelling to Trixie, begging her to have mercy on her.

After being so pleased by her own thought, she decided to actually put this plan into motion. She started reading her grand prize, she found the spell which was different from any other spell she encountered before. This spell required her to not only perform it, but she had to do a chant while performing it, otherwise it wouldn’t work. The chant provided was in some sort of ancient dialect,  and it said it could hold the portal open for five hours, and on top of that, you could make the portal go to any dimension you want, provided you go through the portal thinking of the dimension. This was hard as it said you had to only be thinking of the dimension, while chanting, making the whole ordeal near impossible.

She had to push everything out of her mind, every single thing had to go, even the chant, but, she needed the chant to keep the portal open. Whatever would she do? She buried her head in her hooves, not knowing what to do, she had done all this work for what? Just to fail right at the end? How could she come all this way for her revenge, study useless books containing information she already knew, almost get caught stealing these two books from Twilight, just to have to stop now.

She sulked in her failure, but that’s when the idea came to mind. She ripped out the picture of Excalibur and wrote the chant on the picture. She studied this page until all she could think was Excalibur, yet at the same time she could still do the chant. She studied the chant until she could say it without a hitch.

She walked through the Everfree Forest until she found an open portal underneath a huge, fallen tree. The tree had brown leaves that showed that it was dying, the trunk was moldy and rotten. She started to walk through the portal while chanting the ancient chant.

“Ayudafa sine fada me tu, lana te fas se ka ra.” She chanted, performing the spell and looking straight at the picture which sat in her hoof. She continued through the portal and when she got to the other side, she no longer was holding the note in her hoof. She was now human to fit into the dimension she now found herself in. Her hooves had been replaced by hands and feet, she was now about five and a half feet tall, her coat of fur replaced by a blue jacket and jeans. Her mane was now to about shoulder length, her horn was gone, but, she felt a strange power inside her. This power was familiar yet, it wasn’t. What I mean is that it felt the same as how she felt when performing spells, but along with her magic, she felt more power in her than she ever felt before.

“I-it worked!” Trixie laughed to herself, pleased as she looked at her new body, “Spectacular! I have arrived in Death City! Now to just find that-”

“Look out!” yelled a voice at Trixie, who looked to her right to have some sort of beast pounce on top of her. This beast had a long tongue, sharp claws and it’s eyes were almost non existent. It held down Trixie, slobbering all over her, licking it’s blood stained lips as it brought a claw up in a threatening manner. A chain had flown out and wrapped itself around the beast’s arm. The beast had been pulled back with such force, landing on it’s back as a spiky blue haired teenager had his chain change into a ninja sword, getting ready to slice the beast in two. He got in front of Trixie in a protective stance as the beast had swung at him, knocking him back into a wall that Trixie was up against, knocking him out. The beast charged at Trixie, who could do nothing but scream,

“Aaaaaagggggghhhhhhhhhh!” a blood-curdling scream emitted from Trixie as fear shot throughout her body as a blond haired schoolgirl with pigtails came out of nowhere and held a scythe up to impede the beast’s movement.

“Kid! We need help over here! Me and Soul can’t hold him back for much longer!” Just then a third teenager had appeared, wielding two pistols, one in each hand. He had his pinkie fingers on the triggers instead of his index fingers, but without saying a word, he fired at the beast, practically disintegrating it in the process. All that was left behind was a sort of glowing orb. The blue haired boy’s weapon had turned into a human female, who tried to wake him up.

“Black Star! Black Star! Wake up!” She shook him, trying to wake him up, then she accidentally knocked his head against the wall. The pain from this had shocked him back to consciousness,

“Yow! Tsubaki!? Why did you do that!?” he yelled in a rather annoying fashion, aggravated at his partner, “How could you let me get knocked out and letting me miss the fight!?”

“Oh I’m sorry Black Star! But I’m glad you’re okay!” she bowed apologetically to him as the other girl’s weapon became human, along with the boy who was called ‘Kid,’ who’s weapons too changed to human.

“Not to break things up,” Said the one who was a scythe a few seconds ago, “But who gets the Kishin's soul? There’s four of us who need it, but only one soul.”

The blond girl had ignored him and turned to Trixie, holding out a hand to help her up, “Who are you?” she asked as Trixie grabbed her hand and got up, “Where did you come from?” She pointed over at the portal Trixie came out of, “Did you come from there?”

Trixie dusted herself off, “I am the great and powerful Trixie! Yes, I did come from there,” She saw the blue haired one walking towards it, “Stay away from there!” She shouted, making him jump almost ten feet in the air, “If you go through there, it may close!”

“Jeez! Okay, I’ll stay away...”

“Well Trixie,” said the school girl, “I’m Maka, my weapon partner over there is Soul,” She pointed at the former scythe, the teenager had white hair with part of it pointed to his right, he wore what seemed like a yellow jumpsuit, “That’s Black Star and Tsubaki,” she pointed at the blue haired one and his partner. He wore a black sleeveless shirt and white cargo shorts and his companion had black hair fashioned into a ponytail, a long gray cloak with a star, and had a very welcoming look to her. Now Maka pointed to the one who had two weapons, “That’s Kid, Lord Death’s son, the taller one on his left is Liz, and the shorter one on his right is Patty.” Kid had an all black suit on, a bored, expressionless face, and his hair was half black, while the other half was black and white striped. Liz and Patty both wore the same outfit, a red half shirt with long blue jeans and a sort of white fedora.

“Yeah, yeah,” Trixie said with an expression that told everyone she didn’t care, “Listen, do any of you know of one named Excalibur?” Both Black Star and Kid’s faces showed horror, disgust, and regret all at the same time.

“E-Excalibur?” they both said in unison.

“Yes, Excalibur. You know, powerful weapon, can turn into a funny little creature?”

“Funny is accurate alright...” Soul said under his breath, then out loud he stated, “Yeah, he stays with Lord Death at the academy, c’mon we’ll take you to him, we’ll sort out who gets the soul later.” Maka put the soul in her bag, then they set off towards the academy. Along the way they didn’t see a single person on the street, nobody talked at all. It was a really awkward walk that took roughly half an hour. The whole city was so grim, but the academy on the other hand, was big and seemed full of life.

The eight people had entered the academy, ignoring anybody who tried to stop them to talk, passing up anybody who was their friend because they just needed to introduce Excalibur to Trixie. This was going to be a relief for everyone as Excalibur was easily the most annoying living being to have ever been put on this earth. When they had arrived at Lord Death’s chamber, they opened the door and walked down the hall of guillotines which paved the way. They met up with Lord Death face to face, well, face to mask in this case.

“Hello everybody! Who is this? Is this a new admirer for Spirit?” He joked as he saw Trixie, nobody laughed at this poor attempt at comedy. Maka especially hated this joke as her father was such a womanizer he destroyed hi marriage with her mother.

“Lord Death,” Maka started, forgetting that joke which was in poor taste, “I’m sorry to interrupt you, but this lady here is named Trixie. She wanted to see Excalibur.”

A voice called at them from behind, it was so loud that they all jumped from the scare, “Fools!”

“Wah!” they all screamed as they flew up in the air.

“You wish to speak with me?!” the voice asked as they all turned around.

“Ah Mr. Excalibur, yes, we do!” Maka said to the creature. He was a small white creature, not human like, with a light blue top hat and a light blue suit. His nose was pointed and he had big round eyes. He brought his cane up to Maka’s face,

“Fool! You remember provision number five hundred and twenty four, give me two hours notice before gracing my presence with anything that isn’t a gift!” Maka pushed the cane out of her face.

“I’m not your meister, so that doesn’t apply to me.” She said with an impatient look.

“I am the Great and Powerful Trixie,” Trixie stepped forward to greet herself to Excalibur, “I have come to seek your help. I want to exact my revenge upon Twilight Sparkle, and I believe you may be able to help.” Excalibur hit her in the face with his cane.

“Fool! If you want to be my meister, you must first complete the one thousand required provisions. Then I’ll consider you as a meister.” Excalibur said to her, he didn’t have a distinguishable mouth, so it was really creepy to see him make words.

“Uh, yes, but we can do that back in Equestria, we only have four more hours before the portal closes.” Trixie informed the little runt as in the background Kid, Black Star, and Soul all silently danced with joy, ending with a hi five between the three.

“Well then, this would be a great time to implement Provision number one hundred.”

“Which is?” He hopped on Trixie’s back and stated,

“If you are not walking behind me, you are carrying me.” He held his cane out in front of Trixie and said, “Well, we best be off then! Goodbye Lord Death!”

“Goodbye! Have fun!” They all waved while everyone but Lord Death danced at Excalibur’s leaving.

Trixie walked through the halls and ended up outside, she looked at her watch which had appeared on her right wrist when her form changed, “Ugh, I don’t feel like walking anymore.” she waved her hands around, getting ready to cast a spell when Excalibur hit her in the face with his cane.

“Fool! Provision number eight hundred and ninety three clearly states, no magic without my permission.” he held out a list that was entitled, ‘The One Thousand Provisions.’ Trixie got annoyed as she started to walk to where the portal was.

As she walked, Excalibur read off some of the provisions to Trixie to pass the time,

“These are the provisions you must remember the most:

Provision number one: My mornings start off with a cup of coffee with cream.

Provision number twenty two: On a refreshing morning, start out with a refreshing greeting.

Provision number fifty seven: Always place a dehumidifier in your room.

Provision number fifty eight: Never talk to me when I'm humming to myself.

Provision number seventy five: Celebrate my birthday in grand-style!

Provision number one hundred and seventy two: Seek harmony.

Provision number two hundred and two: Only the Grandest toilet is acceptable for my bottom.

Provision number two hundred and seventy eight: Never put carrots in my meals.

Provision number three hundred and forty nine: You must eat everything I tell you, regardless of your personal likes and dislikes.

Provision number four hundred and fifty two: You must attend my 5 hour storytelling party. This is the most important provision, as if you’re going to be my meister, you must know all about my life.

Provision number five hundred and seventy three: Always walk 3 steps behind me.

Provision number five hundred and seventy eight: You must never tell a lie.

Provision number. six hundred and two: Food must be prepared with only the freshest ingredients.

Provision number. six hundred and sixty seven: You must praise me at all times.

Provision number. six hundred and seventy nine: Always place a dehumidifier in your room.

Provision number. seven hundred and seventy eight: Never mail your mail without a return address and the proper postage, and don't call collect.

Provision number. nine hundred and ninety eight: When you order a package for home delivery, you must always use cash on delivery.”

Trixie was already tired of this guy, they were at the portal and she was seriously thinking of leaving him, but if he would help her, then there is no reason she can’t deal with it for a few days. What’s worse is that she didn’t even get some of those rules, like ‘Seek Harmony.’ What does that even mean? She stepped through the portal and it closed right behind her, obviously since she no longer needed it and it wouldn’t be good if she left it open and anything could get through. She was now a pony again, along with Excalibur, who looked basically the same, except his tail was now his cane and he was obviously a stallion instead of... whatever he was before. But as they were now back in Equestria, unable to get back, Trixie wondered if this was a terrible mistake, but what's the worst that could happen?

You Broke Provision Number BLAH BLAH BLAH!!!

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