Part Ten: Adjustment

Princess Celestia walked down the stairs, gently putting a hoof on each step in an example of perfect grace and precision. Her ears twitched and swivelled as she extended her senses, trying to pick up conversation. She hated to visit the older memories of those times long past when Excolotis had walked. There was so much blood; so much death.

Never the less, she was jerked out of her thoughts as she came down the stairs to the cells. Her ears twitched as she heard the obvious signs of Spider and Twilight in heated argument.

“...where is the evidence of these events?” shouted Twilight, “This seems like some sort of abridged version; a watered down tale for those who don’t want to know the truth!”

“And if we all acted like you, Miss Sparkle,” yelled Spider Script, “We’d probably revisit half of the old atrocities committed by our ancestors! Need I remind you of the Apple taxation, where an apple pie cost sixty bits of today’s money!?”

“Oh that’s real mature! Compare me to those Appleists! What’s next? Gonna call me a Tribal? Any more monsters you wanna compare me to?”

Celestia shook her head.

“Oh, yeah, sure, I’m calling you an Appleist!” Spider script said, his voice dripping with sarcasm, “If you want bland old facts and figures, then you might as well cast a spell and call up the numbers! Ponies are more than that, Twilight Sparkle!”

“Are you saying-”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying!” yelled Spider Script, “Historians are not like mathematicians! We feel! We feel what they went through, we reconstruct their lives, and we present the truth! No matter how bad it may be! Ponies want to give these events bland names, scientific names, because they don’t want to know what it was like! They wanna take the past and bury it under a rug!”

Celestia smiled; she did so love these insane rants.

“Historians,” continued Spider Script, “Are like GODS of TRUTH! With an impossible penis and steaming testicles! We stride across the mountains, our footsteps leaving crushed lives and orgasming mares (and the occasional stallion) in our wake!”

Celestia took a second to suppress the smirk on her face, smoothing it back into her usual motherly smile. Clearing her throat, Celestia finally rounded the corner, and looked ahead. Twilight was standing with her mouth open and semi-visible disgust on her face. Spider Script was still out of view, behind the bars, but Celestia could hear him breathing hard.

“Twilight,” she called, “Is everything alright?”

“This...” stammered Twilight, “This disgusting pony has been telling me a foal’s tale of historical facts! There’s no depth, no facts, it’s all just one big opinion piece!””

“It’s called basic fucking attachment!” said Spider, “Every law that curbs our basic freedoms, every lie about the things we care about, every crime committed by these cock fuckers, that’s what makes me get up and tell the truth, and I’ll do it until the day I die!”

“That’s what I achieve! What we historians achieve! We show these monsters that just as much as they try to herd us into cages of quiet obedience and mediocrity, we can chase them back to fucking Tartarus with the TRUTH! It’s called EMOTIONAL ATTACHMENT! It’s CARING about the world you report on! Some ponies say that’s wrong, that there should be a detached, cold, unbiased view of the world in our schools.”

“And if that’s what you want, there are plenty of other books you can read! Lots and lots of boring facts and figures and numbers and no FUCKING PONIES IN THEM! I want to see ponies caring and talking about the actual fucking lives of ponies, I want to see jack offs that actually GIVE A SHIT about the world... I want to see... POSSESED ponies!”

“YES!” screamed Spider, “I want to see ponies like ME! Rising up with hate and rage, firing doom lasers fuelled by righteous fury and bile and gargantuan wrought iron testicles-slash-ovaries from their eyes! Possessed by ancient volcano gods from forgotten times, waving vast fertile hips and improbable dicks at the secret monsters of the world! Naked glowing God-Ponies making all the evil little shits crap themselves, twenty four hours a day, seven days a week, a new Equestria... GUARD!”

Twilight jumped back as Spider mashed his face up against the bars, spittle foaming in his mouth and his eyes bulging, “FRESH BEDDING, A MOP, AND A BUCKET OF MOIST TOWELETTS!”

“Well that was disturbing,” said Twilight as she trotted up the stairs, Celestia walking behind her.

“Well, I can’t disagree with you there,” smiled Celestia, “But you must admit, it was funny.”

“Funny?” asked Twilight, “It was disgusting and gross!”

“Oh, yes,” Celestia said, “But can you just imagine it? Fifty foot tall ponies with laser eyes? Priceless!”

“I really don’t think...”

“Oh! Oh!” Celestia continued, “And the improbable dicks? HA! That was fantastic!”

Twilight looked on in bemusement as Celestia broke down into giggles and occasionally repeating certain phrases, which in turn set off another bout of suppressed giggles.

“Princess...” said Twilight, as they levelled out into the halls.

“Ha, ha ha... mares and stallions... Pftt HA ha ha ha...”

“Princess...”

“Oh, heh, sorry Twilight...” Celestia smiled, turning to look at Twilight, “I just haven’t laughed that hard in a long time.”

Twilight stared at Celestia, one eyebrow raised, “How can you think that was funny?’ asked Twilight.

“Sometimes,” Celestia admitted, “I like crude humour. And it’s a refreshing change from all the proper and checked words that everyone says around me.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, Twilight, it is something I have a problem with.” said Celestia, her expression becoming crestfallen, “I remember when I first met him. He had hair back then.”

There had been an official dinner, though Celestia couldn’t remember what it was about, exactly. She had seemed to spend her whole life at such things, or signing paper work, or reading reports, just... being a ruler. There were nothing but arch, giggling Mares, or braying Stallions, who had been at the back of the line when things like, say, humility, good humour, respect for others, compassion and brains were handed out. They had done very little but spread rumours, say back handed, acidic compliments, and suck up to her. And, as usual, she’d gone back to her chambers in a filthy mood, all hidden beneath a content smile.

She had noticed a light under the kitchen door, and on some strange, mad whim, had gone in. Shining Armour (he’d still had his old lance corporal stripes) was there, with the old mare who stoked the boiler and the head gardener, and the young colt that replaced the candles and lit the fires. They were playing cards. They had mugs of cider. They were having fun.

And for one moment, just one moment, Celestia wanted nothing more than to be just like them.

She had pulled up a stool, smiled, said a few hellos, and asked to be dealt in. And they had been... Welcoming. In a way. But as time went on, Celestia became aware of the room crystallizing and freezing around her. It was like being a speck of grit between two cogs in a clock, and the whole thing lurched.

They kept calling Celestia “princess”, and clearing their throats. Everything was very... Careful.

And Celestia had emptied her throat with a cough, said that she needed to be getting on to bed, thanked them for a lovely time, and left trying so very hard not to cry.

Celestia trotted out into the cold night of the garden, and headed for the maze. She stepped through the entrance with its banners, blinking back tears as she tried to hold on to her composure. At first, she had just jinxed left and right as the mood took her, but eventually, she just ran. Before long, she broke into a full gallop, her hooves digging up the grass as she just ran and ran and ran, not caring nor wanting to care about where she was going just as long as it wasn’t here.

The thing about mazes, though, is that if you run fast enough, eventually you’ll get to the middle.

The centre of the hedge maze was about fifteen feet across, just big enough for a circular bench around a large statue of a thin, lanky Alicorn. Many had been curious about the nature of the statue, as it couldn’t be Celestia. She had curves.

Celestia sat on the bench, and looked up at the statue. She stared at it, and blinked when her vision began to blur. “Oh, Damnit.” She said, “Damnit damnit damnit. Ooh, just hold it together, Celestia, come on...”  She took shaky breaths, and despite her best efforts, the tears came.

Celestia wept.

“Princess?”

Celestia looked up, startled by the new presence in the centre of the maze. A malt brown earth pony with a chocolate mane had come up to her. Celestia went into a small spiral of panic. ‘Oh piss, he’s seen me crying, oh I’m in trouble, oh gods oh gods what do I... oh forget it.’ Celestia screwed up her face; she just couldn’t be bothered trying to find a way out of it. The combined weight of nearly a thousand years alone bore down on her, though some part of her made her turn her head, embarrassed by her tears.

“Princess, what’s wrong?” the pony leapt up next to her. Now that Celestia bothered to look at the young pony, she could see that he was a young stallion. His Cutie Mark was that of an unrolled scroll, one of the old fashioned ones with two binder poles.

“Just...” started Celestia, “Just remembering old times gone.”

“You miss your sister, don’t you?” said the pony.

Celestia nodded, “How can you remember her? Almost no one does.”

“I have an interest in history,” smiled the pony, “If we don’t remember the past, we’re doomed to chase it around like a bunch of dumb bastards.”

“Heh, a wise view,” nodded Celestia, “They don’t quite understand...”

“...how loneliness can make a pony feel.” finished the stallion, “My name’s Spider Script. And I’m willing to bet that you don’t want to be called ‘Princess’, right Celestia?”

“That’s what I like most about Spider Script; He doesn’t think of me as some sort of porcelain figure with a label, he thinks of me as a real pony... and I... I guess it makes the days less lonely. Even immortal Alicorn rulers need friends, Twilight.”

“Ah,” Twilight said, “But if you don’t mind me asking, how exactly does he keep his job as a historian? I’d imagine that his bosses don’t like to keep him around.”

“Spider Script is the head of the Historians Society Twilight,” said Celestia, “He answers directly to the board, and despite his... Eccentric behaviour, he’s actually very popular. He deals in more modern history, politics and what not, but he is always infallible in his sources.”

“But his work...” Twilight protested.

“Twilight,” said Celestia, “What Spider Script told you is a rough and dirty version of what will go into the history books, alright?” Twilight nodded.

“Well that’s good,” said Celestia, “Because I still remember what he wrote when Blueblood came of age. I do not want to see the word 'fuck' printed over seven thousand times.”

“So what now?” Twilight asked as they rounded a corner.

“Now?” said Celestia, “Now we wait for Excolotis to return.”

As it turned out, they did not have to wait that long. Eventually, the crunch of hooves on gravel was heard, and Twilight ran up to the windows to see her brother. Already, she could picture him marching proud at the head of shining columns of the Royal Guard, their coats proud and clean, and their uniforms catching the sun’s setting rays.

Twilight ran up to the window, and looked out. She stifled a gasp as she saw the guard. Instead of an organized march, they were a rabble of soldiers. Heads hung low, they slowly trotted into the castle proper, their armour was dulled and scratched, and she could clearly see the mud on their hooves. The exhaustion on them was obvious, many of them simply shambling along. Shining Armour himself was only just staying ahead of the group, and was visibly swaying as he scuffed his hooves on the stone gravel.

Shortly behind them came Excolotis, fresh and steady. He walked slowly behind the ponies in front of him, his helm clipped to his waist and an expressionless mask for a face. Unlike the guard, he was not exhausted, and his movements were still fluid and sharp. Yet he was angry, that much was obvious, his eyes furrowed and his mouth locked in a scowl. As the column of guards moved into the courtyard, the source of his anger soon became clear.

The Paparazzi.

Held back behind a line of fresh guards, the ponies of the mass media corporations swarmed, each clamouring for a photograph of the black armoured giant; each shouting questions and inquiries at the retreating back of the War God.

One jumped up, a Pegasus using his wings to gain a natural advantage. “...It true that you are courting Celes-...” Before he could finish, an Earth Pony used another as a springboard to leap up and shout his question, “...Questions of incompetence in the...” only to be replaced by a unicorn using her telekinesis spell to lift herself into the air, “...What new threats does Equestria face?”

Ignoring the incessant questions from the press, Excolotis strode across the gravel paths as quickly as his tall legs would allow, Shining Armour trotting after in an exhaustion daze. Twilight shivered as she stared at Shining Armour, before running down the stairs to meet up with them.

Celestia held a meeting in the main dining hall for the Royal Sisters, with Excolotis, Shining Armour, and Twilight in attendance. The room itself had been built out of polished marble, with gold and silver inlays displaying the faces of great heroes of Equestria, with the faces of Twilight and her friends being a recent addition. Over head, a chandelier provided the illumination, with the sun having set long ago. The far wall held windows that gave a lovely view of the night sky.

“What happened exactly, Shining Armour,” asked Celestia, “I hope that Excolotis did not get too frustrated by the press.”

“I’m right here,” said Excolotis, sitting on the table itself as no chair was big enough for him, “You could always ask me.”

Celestia ignored him, motioning gently with her hoof to signify that Shining Armour should speak. “Well,” he said, “here’s what happened...”

“What happened was that the... Pepper-rat-si interfered with a training exercise,” Excolotis interrupted, “I’ll have to run the exercise again.”

“Oh, dear gods no...” groaned Shining.

“Excuse me, Excolotis,” said Celestia, “but I was talking to the Captain. Please continue, Shining Armour.”

“Yes, well,” said the white unicorn, “We were supposed to be performing a thirty kilometre march, but shortly after we left the gate, the press began to swarm Excolotis. He... responded angrily, telling the press in no uncertain terms to go away and leave him alone so that he could continue the exercise.”

“What were the exact words he used?” asked Celestia.

“I think,” said Shining Armour, “it was ‘you are interfering with official business! Be on your way now!’”

“And did they leave?” Celestia asked.

“No, they did not,” Shining Armour sighed, “Then he became more aggressive, saying that if the press did not stop preventing him from his duty that he would have them detained.”

“And then what happened?” asked Celestia.

“A gryphon member of the press, Gruilda, showed up and began harassing Excolotis...”

“Excolotis! Gruilda of the Free Wing Press! Are you planning to attempt to finish your genocide of the griffin peoples?”

“Be quiet! This is your final warning!”

“Is it true that you are secretly planning yet another revolt against the princesses?”

“...What... did you say?!”

“Are you going to show your monstrous side again, and terrorise the public until...”

CRACK!

“You put a griffin into the hospital.” Said Celestia, “Why am I not surprised?”

“After what she said,” growled Excolotis, “she should count herself lucky I didn’t rip out HER FUCKING! HEART!”

Twilight flinched as the shout echoed away, the windows rattling from Excolotis’ sudden outburst.

“Calm yourself,” said Celestia, “Gruilda makes her stories by causing problems in the first place, this isn’t the first time she’s caused an incident just to get material for her rag of a paper.”

“Then why is she still doing it?” asked Excolotis, “She is deliberately causing trouble. Why not send her to the torturers for a spell?”

Celestia sighed, “First, she technically hasn’t broken any laws until now. Second, I don’t just throw ponies to the torturers, and third, they’re now called Information Retrieval Technicians.”

Excolotis blinked, “What’s the difference?”

“About sixteen bits an hour,” Celestia shrugged, “But that’s beside the point. The thing is, what you need to do now is adjust to these new times. Four thousand years ago ponies were more careful with insults because it could end in a cracked skull, but now we are more forwards with our words because we are not as violent. Ponies rely on laws to punish, not their hooves.”

“That is why I want you to enter an anger management course,” Celestia continued, “You need to learn how to behave in this new society...”

Celestia stopped dead.

When Ponies are arguing (or debating as they prefer to call it) and try to get their point across... well there are many ways to do this. Some settle for yelling and cursing, either suddenly or constantly. A few might bang tables, or sweep off the contents with a leg. Glaring angrily is a popular move. A rare few might say something in a quiet, yet threatening tone of voice. Excolotis, however, froze. His face locked into an expression of neutrality, and rage radiated off him in waves. Twilight shivered as the anger and malevolence form Excolotis made her fur stand on end, and she scooted away from him as the War God turned to look at Celesita.

“I do not need anger management.”

It was right about then when Shining made a common mistake when dealing with an angry man: he tried reason. “Well, you must admit,” said Shining, “You are a bit out of touch with society.”

“No I am not.”

“Never the less,” said Celestia, “You do admit that most of the media ponies who have been bothering you are... well... idiots who don’t know when to stop. So rather than have them missing a few bones, or perhaps a lung, I’d like it if they were simply told to go away. As such, you are going to do this. Plus it will send a message that you are trying to be a productive member of society so that I don’t get half a dozen nobles trying to get you locked up or banished because they are too scared and stupid to do otherwise.”

Celestia shifted in her seat as Excolotis’ hands began to squeeze the table, the wood creaking in protest.

“If it’s all right, could you follow Shining Armour to a guest room?” Celestia asked, “I think that it is best if I simply get you moved in here where I can help everyone adjust.”

Twilight held her breath.

Excolotis looked down at his lap and nodded, and just like that, the tension in the room was gone.

“Well then,” said Celestia, “I think that it’s settled... Shining Armour, could you please show Excolotis to the guest chambers?”

Shining Armour stood, and led Excolotis through the main doors and towards the bedrooms.

Back in the halls, Celestia sighed, and slumped back into her seat.

“Is everything alright, princess?” asked Twilight.

Celestia sighed, and put her hoof against her face with a mild clop noise. “No, I’m worried. Has Excolotis been subdued lately?”

“What do you mean?” Twilight cocked her head, “He’s been quiet, but I wouldn’t say subdued.”

Celestia sighed, “He’s been floating along, hasn’t he?” she asked, “Not talking much, not arguing much, just doing as he’s told without complaint or comment. Is that about right?”

Twilight nodded.

“That’s not good news.” Said Celestia, resting her forelegs on the table, “If Excolotis is doing that, it means he’s not thinking at all.”

“I don’t understand,” said Twilight, “What do you mean?”

“When Luna came back, she was very quiet wasn’t she?” said Celestia, “Didn’t say much, didn’t do much, just stood there quietly. She was... fragile, withdrawn; for a while she would often hang around my legs like a yearling going outside for the first time.”

“So... Excolotis is like that?” asked Twilight, “Hidden?”

“Muted,” Celestia said, “His personality is hidden inside, and he’s withdrawn fron the world. For now, he’s not thinking about anything. It’s far too painful for him to think about what happened. But the moment he does...”

“He’s going to be dangerous?” Twilight said, fear edging into her voice.

“It’s the same thing Luna went through.” said Celestia, “At first, she was quiet, not there at all; just drifting around me, frightened to leave my presence. For a time she refused to sleep in her own room. Then she became angry. Said I overreacted, that banishing her to the moon for a thousand years was too much. She shouted over the smallest things.”

“Then things became... strange,” Celestia continued, “She became frightened of me. She gave me gifts, doted on me, did anything I asked for, and a few things I didn’t... It’s the standard reaction to extreme loss and pain.”

“The five steps of grieving,” said Twilight, “First denial, then anger, then bargaining, then depression, then finally acceptance.”

“Exactly,” said Celestia, “But anything that makes him remember... The reporter he put in the hospital, for instance...”

“...Is going to trigger rage,” finished Twilight, “What are we going to do? If he goes into the next stage...”

“Odds are he’s going to destroy everything that he sees.” said Celestia, “Unless we find him sufficient distraction. Namely, you.”

“What!?” Twilight jumped up in her seat, “But princess, how am I supposed to control an angry god!?”

“I’m not asking you to tie him down with magic chains,” Celestia said, leaning over and putting a wing around her student, “I’m merely asking you to show him a path through his anger. Right now what he needs is a friend. You must accept his rages, accept his tears, and understand that right now, what he needs is a friend. And above all else, you must keep him away from Luna.”

“Luna?” said Twilight, “Why Luna?”

“Luna is one of the last things that Excolotis attacked when he was... possessed.” Celestia explained, “If Luna saw him, she would scream and run. It’s important that he doesn’t see her, or else he might fall into a deep depression at her fear, and I’m not certain if he could be pulled out of it.”

“It’s best for them both if they don’t see each other then,” said Twilight, “They’d both freak.”

“Exactly,” Said Celestia, “and it’s best if you don’t talk about him to her and vice versa, it would make them nervous.”

“Understood.”

“Thank you,” said Celestia, “Excolotis’ room is opposite yours. You’ve already been set up there, so don’t worry about a thing. Please head there as quickly as possible; it’s best if you be there. I don’t know when he’ll go into the second stage.”

Twilight nodded, and ran out the room, nearly colliding with Luna. “Sorry, Princess!”

Luna blinked, and then walked into the room proper. “You wanted to see me?”

“Yes,” said Celestia, “we need to talk about Excolotis.”

“Oh?” said Luna, pulling up a chair with her magic and sitting down, “what is it?”

“Excolotis has been placed in the guest chambers opposite your wing.” Celestia explained, “I need you to stay away from that wing whilst Excolotis is here.”

“Why?” Luna asked, “I need to talk to him, forgive him. I can’t let him wallow in misery, and I most certainly do not fear him.”

“He’s still sensitive,” said Celestia, “He is still greatly upset, and much too fragile. If you went to him now...”

“I’d make him even more miserable...” said Luna, “That makes sense.”

“I’ve told Twilight to look after him whilst he grieves,” said Celestia, putting a hoof on Luna’s shoulder, “Do not worry, he is in good care. I’ve told Twilight to keep contact with you to a minimum, please understand that this is to keep Excolotis safe, if he goes looking for her and finds you together...”

“He might fall deeper into melancholy.” nodded Luna, “Do not worry sister, I understand.”

“Thank you.”

Not too far away from the Crystal Empire sat a small house. It was a simple little thing, one door, and only seven windows and a green field around it. A washing line, really nothing more than a string nailed to a wall and tied around a pole, was hung out to one side. The Moon was full and fat, hanging overhead and giving everything a blue tint.

“That’s our target!”

On top of a hill overlooking the house seven figures in green mottled cloaks huddle close to the ground. A twitch moved the fabric of the camouflaged cloak aside, and a set of binoculars moved up, held in place by blue magic. More cloaks shifted, showing hooked beaks and snouts.

“Okay, I want it tight and fast,” said the lead form, “Deploy quickly, and enact plan Green. Let’s have it smooth, and by the numbers guys.”

“This Bear guy has killed the last five assassins sent after him. Supposed to be one tough hombre, but now, tonight, he’s facing,” the seven forms leapt to their feet, throwing their cloaks off and into the wind, swords and glaives popping into the talons of griffins or held aloft by the magic of unicorns, “BRAVO FORCE! Let’s go!”

Bravo Force ran down the hill at a decent pace, their studded leather and half helms glinting in the moonlight. They slid to a halt outside the front, and only, door.

“BREACH! GOGOGOGOGO!”

A unicorn slammed both his hind legs into the door in one powerful, smooth motion, crashing it open with such force that the door cracked, and hung off its shattered hinges.

The inside was spartan and clean, with a high ceiling and only one other door, presumably leading to the toilet. The living area was the bedroom, and the only other thing apart from a mass of blankets and furs on the floor was a counter and wood stove.

Bravo Force moved in quickly, swords held out in front in defensive stances, while a griffin with a winged spear prodded at the bedding.

“Clear!”

A unicorn blew the door to the bathroom right off its hinges with a single blast, showing a cracked toilet and a clean bathroom, but no Bear.

“Clear!”

The leader snorted through his nostrils, “There’s only two rooms, where is he?”

“Ah! Hello Friends!” A monstrous shape stood in the main doorway. Bravo Force couldn’t see what it was, but they didn’t hesitate, hefting up weapons and charging.

A massive claw swept out and across, disembowelling the lead pony, and sending blood slick blue ropes of intestines across the floor, mail and leather shredded. Another caught a spear and wrenched it out of a griffins grasp. Thick fingers curled around the neck of the disarmed griffin and snapped it.

”Come now, Bear has not had guests for long time, and you are violent?” a kick sent another sprawling head over heels, “Bear have Leipziger Allerlei ready, let us be friends, no?”

A sword slashed through the air, drawing blood from the beast, but the monster moved past, taking up the offending pony in one claw, slamming the unicorn into the wall with such force that his blood and meat stuck to the brick and mortar, legs poking out in odd angles.

“What, you do not think Bear is good cook? Bear is insulted.” a massive fist crushed a griffins head into the ground, blood and fluid spraying out from the shattered skull.

Another griffin let out a wordless scream, but the over head, back handed sweep of a claw sent him through a window, glass slicing open vital arteries in his neck and nearly peeling the flesh from his face. Blood pumped out of the ragged cuts in arcs, painting the outside wall.

The final member of Bravo Force, a bright sky blue unicorn, trembled in fear as he huddled up against the kitchen wall as the monster came up to him.

“Bear not ask you who hire you. Is not polite.” a claw reached under the sink, and withdrew a bow, and a fork. “But Bear only wants one thing.”

The bowl was dipped into a steaming pot, “Oh please... please don’t...”

“Bear is good host,” the bowl was drawn back, steaming gloop inside, “Bear know you come, so Bear prepare for Bravo.”

The unicorn sat down in fear, urine trickling through his legs as his wits left him. He flinched as the bowl was thrust towards him.

“Bear sorry Bear not have salt.” inside the bowl was a brown soup, chunks of potato and carrot slices floating in the froth, “But Bear think that Leipziger Allerlei not need seasoning.”

“Huh?” the unicorn stared at the soup bowl in front of him. “You’re not gonna hurt me?”

“Why Bear hurt Bravo? Bear know that Bravo mercenaries. Mercenaries do as told; don’t ask why. But Bravo do favour for Bear”

“What?”

The monster leant down, his face nearly touching the unicorns, “Bravo tells masters that Bear not have patience. If Bravo masters do not stop, Bear come for them next.”

A wisp of royal purple smoke flitted in through the door, the unicorn flinching as it headed straight for the Bear. Bear looked up as it condensed into a scroll, a plain wax seal keeping it tied together. It landed with a soft plop upon the wooden floor, and the Bear picked it up, cradling the small thing in one huge paw.

A slice of a claw undid the seal, and the scroll popped open with a small sproing. The Bear stared at the scroll, before turning to the unicorn. “What does scroll say?”

The door to Excolotis’ new home opened with not a sound. The servants took pride in maintaining the palace, and their work was reflected (Figuratively and literally) in the apartment given to the War God. The floor was polished white marble, not a crack in the floor as it was a whole slab, carved from living rock. Upon the floor was a mess of rugs and furs, gifts from the griffin kingdoms. Celestia had ordered them put there, for she knew of Excolotis’ feet, and while a pony wouldn’t feel the cold stone he would. The bed itself was massive, big enough to keep three Celestia’s within its sheets, and its length was enough that it took up nearly all the room.

The north wall had two glass doors set into it, and beyond was a balcony, large enough for Excolotis to lie flat on his back, and stare up at the clouds. Rails that would of have kept Twilight from looking over only came up to Excolotis’ knees. A bright spell globe was set into the ceiling, and a button next to the door would turn it on or off.

Excolotis sat upon the bed, the springs creaking in protest at his weight as Twilight walked into the room. In his arms was his sack of belongings.

“If you need me, you can find me straight across the hall,” said Twilight, "you haven’t eaten dinner, have you?”

Excolotis shook his head.

“Right,” nodded Twilight, “then I’ll head off to the kitchens and see if I can get something for you, okay?”

Excolotis nodded, “Yes, thank you.”

Twilight lingered. Was this the sadness that Celestia had told her to bear? Excolotis had smiled much, and in the bar with the pool table he had joked and laughed. But now he seemed to be thinking, and it hurt him. Twilight felt uneasy.

Excolotis lay back of the bed, and stared at the ceiling as Twilight gently shut the door behind her.

He counted to ten under his breath.

Excolotis stood on his feet, the rugs muffling the clanks of his sabatons. He moved quiet, stalking like a panther as he moved to the balcony doors. Excolotis’ eyes moved left and right, and he reached out and closed the curtains. He reached into his sack, and pulled out the wooden arrows he had made at Fluttershy’s cottage. He quickly took out a roll of string, and deftly tied them together, wrapping them in a cocoon of string. He then wedged the bundle into the glass door handles, and with a cursory tug ne made sure that they would not open.

He moved quickly to the hallway door and slid the locks into place, top, bottom, and handle.

Rainbow Dash looked up from the latest Daring Doo novel, Daring Doo and the Thing on the Doorstep, and glanced at the clock. Rarity, Pinkie, and Applejack sat staring at Fluttershy as she fidgeted nervously.

“Uh... y’do know that we’ve known that you’re the resident butcher in Ponyville, right?” said Applejack.

Fluttershy nodded, “Yes, I know.”

“And we’re totally okay with that.” Pinkie Pie said.

Fluttershy peeped.

“And we most certainly don’t think any less of you for what you do.” said Rarity, putting her hoof on Fluttershy’s shoulder, “Don’t you remember? I’ve bought fish from you many a time to feed Opalescence.”

“Yeah,” said Rainbow, “And I’m not bothered by the whole, ‘Fluttershy chopping up a pig’ part, just that it was... kinda gross to watch.”

Fluttershy nodded.

“Okay,” Rainbow nodded, “I just wanted to make that clear. Fluttershy cutting up dead animals isn’t a secret in Ponyville, and we don’t hate her for it. Now, you’re probably wondering why I’ve called you here.”

“You told us when you asked us here,” said Pinkie, “But go right ahead! I like it when you spout exposition!”

Rainbow glared at Pinkie, searching her face for any sign of sarcasm, but Pinkie returned Rainbow’s glare with an honest and open face.

“Right... well I’ve invited Lyra over here.” said Rainbow.

“Lyra!?” said Rarity, “She’s creepy, have you seen how she sits?”

“Oh, that’s just force of habit from when she was with foal.” said Pinkie, “It took pressure off her belly, and made things easier for the baby.”

“Really?” said Rainbow, “I thought that it was because she had those weird fascinations with humans.”

“Wait, but doesn’t that mean that she’s been kinda validated by Excolotis,” said Fluttershy, “I mean, now she’s, the biggest expert. Isn’t she?”

“Exactly,” said Rainbow, “she is the biggest expert on humans, and since Excolotis is a human, or whatever, we should be able to do something about all that. Y’know, learn?”

“Makes sense, I suppose.” said Rarity, while Fluttershy and Pinkie nodded along.

“Wait a moment,” said Applejack, blowing her hair out of her eyes, “If I remember right, didn’t Lyra also read up on a lot of other things that aren’t real? Like Sectopods, Chryssalids, Etherals, and Mutons?”

“That’s right, Applejack,” said Lyra, “They aren’t real, and neither are humans.” The girls turned to look at Lyra. The mint green unicorn was standing in the front door; half empty saddlebags on her sides. “Sorry to let myself in, but the door was open.”

Lyra trotted into the library, slamming the door behind her with a hoof. She trotted over to the central table, lifting her saddle bags in a minty green glow and depositing them upon the table.

“So then,” Lyra smiled, “You want to know about Excolotis? Well you’re in luck, I happen to know quite a bit about the legends and stories around him. In fact, he’s the inspiration for the legend of humans.”

“What does that mean,” said Applejack as Lyra sat at the table, “Excolotis is the original human?”

“No,” Lyra shook her head, “Excolotis is the first, and only, human. Ponies came up with myths and legends inspired by the War God long before the Discordant Era, back during the First Equestria. He is, quite literally, one of the oldest creatures in creation. Only Discord is as old, or possibly older. We don’t know, because there wasn’t a written language back then.”

The girls sat there digesting that new information silently. “I don’t think I like the idea of some prehistoric War God.” said Applejack, “Now the idea of Excolotis, which I can understand, but a prehistoric... that’s just asking for trouble.”

“Yes, well,” said Lyra, waving a hoof dismissively, “The earliest records about Excolotis are from the first Era.” Lyra opened her bags and drew out a thick book. The pages were uneven and roughly bound with string, and had the look of something that had been added to many times.

“Commander Pansy,” said Lyra, “writes of ‘A great giant, a monstrous beast, who descended upon the lair of Ovahdviing, the dread wing ‘ed snow hunter, and slew it.’ After that there are more mentions of the beast, including ‘The giant beast all in black was seen near Holdsfasts. I led a detachment and saw a monstrous scene. The giant stood amongst great black spears of iron, and the earth was stained red with blood. Upon the black spears lay the corpses of the regiment sent to protect Holdsfasts. The beast mocked the detachment, and invited them to eat. He sat at a table, and revealed a dish of the stallion and mare hoods of the warriors of Holdsfasts. It was then that the unfortunate souls stirred, and I knew that they still lived.’”

“The paper was found on the corpse of Commander Pansy. For the next six years, slaughter and ruin was reported there, and every time the survivors told of a great black monster, who stood upon two legs like a great insect.”

“Wait wait wait...” said Rainbow, “Excolotis sounds like some sort of monster, but he was a heck of a lot nicer when we met him!”

“Well said,” nodded Rarity, “I just can’t see Excolotis doing such horrible things.”

Fluttershy nodded, “He’s violent, but not mean...”

“Well you’re quite right about that,” said Lyra, “He’s not a monster, but that was all Celestia there.”

“Wait...” Applejack held up a hoof, “So it was Celestia that sorted him all out? Score one for harmony!”

“Yeah... about that...” said Lyra, “It’s a bit funnier that that... Excolotis used to call Celestia ‘Soror’, which roughly translates to... sister.”