Big Mac's Marijuana

by AllieKat2000

Rating: teen
Tags: Granny Smith, Apple Bloom, Comedy, Random, Flim and Flam, Tragedy, Main 6, Big Macintosh, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2631

Big Macintosh accidentally risks the survival of his family's apple business!

One night, Big Macintosh recieved some marijuana from a drug dealer. After that meeting, everything seems fine.

Until the Flim Flam Brothers arrive in town. They challenge the Apple family to another cider-off, now using the new and improved Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000, which is called the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000. This contest is judged on taste. Big Macintosh and Apple Bloom think they have the contest in the bag, until the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000 accidentally sucks up the marijuana.

It is up to Apple Bloom and Big Macintosh to save Sweet Apple Acres from Flim and Flam. They must plant apple trees all over Ponyville, or Sweet Apple Acres belongs to the Flim Flam Brothers!

Published 2013-06-12 05:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-06-12 05:20:01 UTC

Arrivals

The sun shone down on Sweet Apple Acres. Not a cloud could be found in the sky.
Big Macintosh cantered outside happily, the small plastic bag in his mouth. He was elated, and started dancing around with his marijuana.
He was dancing, when he saw Apple Bloom trot outside. She was going to see him with his drugs!
Big Macintosh galloped away, to the back of the orchard, where nobody dared to go, because it was dark and full of spiky branches. He placed his marijuana on the ground next to a particularly ugly tree, as if it were a glass figurine.
He cantered back to the fields in front of his home.
"Hey Big Macintosh!" Apple Bloom greeted him gaily. "Ya ready for cider season today?"
Big Macintosh gulped. He forgot! It was cider season again!
"What's wrong, brother? You look nervous!"
"Uh, nnnnnope!" Big Macintosh told her.
"Ok! Lets start pickin' apples then! And ya better pick extra, because Apple Jack is sick today!" Apple Bloom trotted away into the orchard.
After a long time of picking and squeezing apples, they had lots of cider. There was already a crowd accumulating at the gate.
"'K every pony, cider season has officially started!" Apple Bloom shouted over the commotion. She and Big Mac pushed barrels of cider onto a wooden table, and set out glasses.
Thirty minutes passed. "Sorry, y'all!" Apple Bloom announced. "We've run out of cider! Cider season's over!"
"Yyyyyup!" Big Macintosh added.
"NOOOO!" Rainbow Dash shouted.
Every pony started to leave, when all of a sudden, the ground started to rumble. Every pony turned around to see what was causing the rumbling. It was the Flim Flam Brothers, and the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000 again!
Their giant machine stopped in front of the orchard.
"Say hello to the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000 2.0!" Flim shouted, after a few minutes of repetitive song.
"We agreed on the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000!" Flam whispered to his brother.
"Oh, uh, yes! That's what I meant!"
Flam donned a competitive face. "And we challenge you to another cider-off!"

Disasters

Soon, the time was up, and the two teams had their barrels of cider. Big Macintosh and Apple Bloom were clearly outmatched. Luckily for them, their cider was to be judged on taste this time.
Granny Smith was to have the first glass. She feebly trotted up a small set of stairs onto a platform. She tried Apple Bloom's and Big Macintosh's cider. "Delicious!" she said into the megaphone, which was pointed towards the crowd of ponies. She then picked up the glass of the Flim Flam Brothers' cider. She took a sip from the glass. Prepared to denounce their cider, Granny Smith was surprised by how good it was.
"I LOVE IT!" she shouted, loud enough so that everypony in the crowd could hear without the megaphone.
Excitedly, the crowd went to try the cider for themselves. All of the ponies tried some of the Apple Family's cider first. They muttered compliments about the cider. Now it was time to try Flim and Flam's cider. Everypony tried some from the top barrel, which was the one that contained Big Mac's marijuana.
The tasters all had puzzled expressions on their faces for a moment. Suddenly, there was a huge commotion. Everypony started saying how they loved the cider, and wanted seconds. Especially Pinkie Pie, who had ten glasses. Soon enough, she was lying on her stomach with a unreadable, bland emotion of her face.
"Oh no, this ain't good," Apple Bloom said. "We don't even have Pinkie Pie on our side!"
"Looks like you owe us the deed to your orchard," Flim said.
"How 'bout y'all give us another day," Apple Bloom suggested. "And you'll give us back that deed if we...we, uh...if we plant apple trees all over Ponyville! Like Pony Appleseed!"
"Fine, kid," Flam agreed. "Don't expect to be the deed holder of this orchard for long,"
Flim and Flam hopped into the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000, and drove away. The crowd of ponies left, leaving Apple Bloom and Big Macintosh alone.
Apple Bloom spun around to look at her older brother. "Now look what ya did!" she growled at him. "How are we gonna plant apple trees all over Ponyville by tomorrow mornin'?"
Big Macintosh opened his mouth to speak.
"Don't tell me that this was my idea, Mac, I already know!" Apple Bloom shouted at her brother. "Now help me think of somethin'!"
Big Macintosh thought for a moment, before whispering something into Apple Bloom's ear.
"That's impossible!" Apple Bloom replied. "The seven of us could never plant so many trees in a day!"
Big Macintosh whispered something else into her ear.
"Great idea, brother!" Apple Bloom cried. "Let's not hesitate! We gotta get crackin'!" She galloped away, followed by Big Macintosh.

Realizations

23 hours after Apple Bloom and Big Macintosh challenged the Flim Flam Brothers for the deed, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash hovered above Ponyville, scoping the area. After a minute, they darted back down to land.
"How does it look?" Apple Bloom asked as the two pegasi, with Big Macintosh next to her, and almost all of Ponyville behind them.
"Looks good!" Rainbow Dash announced.
Everypony cheered.
"But there's a problem," Fluttershy said.
Apple Bloom looked confused. "What is it?"
"You agreed that all of Ponyville would be covered in apple trees, right?"
"Yyyyyup." Big Macintosh confirmed
"Well, I don't see any apple trees!"
"What!?" the astonished Apple Bloom gasped.
"When I was flying above Ponyville, I thought we were all clear, until I realized that there were no apple trees, but only small piles of dirt!"
"What are you trying to say?"
"You agreed there would be apple trees, but the seeds haven't grown into trees yet!"
"Holy Honeycrisp, you're right! What are we gonna do?"
Big Macintosh whispered something into Apple Bloom's ear.
"Great idea!" Apple Bloom exclaimed. "Let's ask Granny Smith!"
Apple Bloom, Big Macintosh, and everypony else galloped off to Sweet Apple Acres.

Winners

The Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000 rolled into town. It stopped in front of Sweet Apple Acres.
Apple Bloom and Big Macintosh arrived from the house, looking sad.
Flim and Flam emerged from their giant machine. "We're ready for our deed," said Flam immpatiently. He held out his hoof to accept the document.
"I am a filly of my word," said Apple Bloom.
The four stood there for a moment.
"We're waiting," warned Flim.
"Look around you," Apple Bloom said past her smile.
Irritated, Flim and Flam looked all around them. Their eyes suddenly widened. In every direction, an apple tree could be seen. They stood tall and proud, as the citizens of Ponyvilles gathered under them and hung out.
"You.. you..." Flam stammered.
"Yyyyyup," Big Macintosh said.
"Fine, you keep your orchard," Flim growled. "we'll be back here someday with a new and improved new and improved Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000!"
"You could have just said 'a new and improved Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000'!" Flam mumbled.
"Oh, that's what I meant,"
Embarassed, Flim and Flam got back in to the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000 and drove off into the distance.
"Woohoo!" Apple Bloom shouted. "We did it, brother!"
"Yyyyyup." Big Macintosh agreed.

Completions

Dear Princess Celestia, Big Macintosh wrote. This past few days, I have learned a lot. Not only can I rely on my friends for help in a tricky situation, but I can rely on strangers, too. I have learned that trusting your friends can sometimes not be enough, thanks to the help of my sister, Apple Bloom. I have also learned one very important lesson: Never use marijuana. Big Macintosh folded up his letter, put it into an envelope, stuck a stamp on to the envelope, and put his letter into the mailbox. He walked back inside, where he opened up a secret compartment in the wall and pulled out a bag of powdered cocaine.

THE END

Cooperations

Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, Twilight Sparkle, and Pinkie Pie (who was now sober) sat in the field together, chatting and enjoying a picnic.
Apple Bloom and Big Macintosh were seen galloping towards them. They went at high speed towards the five friends. They screeched to a stop before them.
"Hey guys!" Twilight Sparkle greeted. "Have you guys seen Apple Jack today? We've been looking for her for a while, now. We just stopped to have a picnic."
"She's sick," Apple Bloom told her. "Y'all need to help Big Macintosh and me. The Flim Flam Brothers are gonna get Sweet Apple Acres if ya don't!"
"Oh no!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed. "What happened?"
"They challenged us to another cider-off." Apple Bloom exclaimed. "This contest was judged by taste, so Big Mac and I though we would definitley win. Again, the prize was the orchard. Before the contest ended, an... unexpected incident happened, an' the Flim Flam Brothers took first place! We agreed to let then keep the orchard if we couldn't plant apple trees all over Ponyville in a day. We know we can't do this alone, so we need your help!"
"Oh, we would be happy to help!" Fluttershy said in her usual quiet voice.
"I'll help, just as long as I don't get dirt on me," Rarity responded.
"Yeah!" Pinkie Pie cheered. "Give us some seeds and we'll be off on our way!"
"It's not that simple," Apple Bloom said. "There's no way in Equestria that we'd be able to plant enough apple trees to cover Ponyville in a day! Which is why Mac and I need y'all to get everypony to help us plant apple seeds."
"Yyyyyup." Big Macintosh said.
"Of course!" Twilight Sparkle agreed. "Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, and I will start planting seeds. As for Pinkie Pie, she can convince everypony to assist us!"
"Yeah!" Pinkie Pie confirmed. "I am great at convincing others to do something! That's why..." She discontinued her sentence.
"Thanks y'all!" Apple Bloom said. "Big Mac and I are real grateful!"
"Yyyyyup." Big Macintosh said.

Secrets

Big Macintosh roamed the streets of Ponyville. The town seemed desolate in the middle of the night. The sun had long set, and the moon floated ominously in the sky, partially shielded by the clouds that produced a gloomy shower. Big Macintosh was grateful for the rain, as it repelled even the ponies who claimed to be night owls.
Big Mac held a big red duffel bag in his teeth. He looked left and right constantly, expecting to find a pony watching him in the shadows.
He reached an abandoned candy shop. He quietly trotted down an alleyway between the shop and, strangely, another abandoned candy shop. He felt safer while he was masked by the shadows.
Big Macintosh stopped near the end of the alley. He placed his duffel bag on the ground.
"Big Macintosh," a devious voice whispered. "Is that you?"
"Yyyyyup." Big Mac replied.
The owner of the voiced moved towards Big Mac. He pulled down the hood on his raincoat, and revealed himself to be Discord.
"Do you have it?" Discord muttered.
Big Macintosh unzipped the duffel bag with his teeth, reached in, and pulled out a cardboard box. He placed it on the ground in front of Discord. Big Mac nudged the box with his nose, and it opened, revealed a steaming apple pie.
"Yyyyyup." Big Macintosh said to Discord.
"Good, good." He closed the box and pulled it towards him. He put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a plastic bag, filled with marijuana. "Here it is. Now, don't tell anyone we met each other, ok?"
"Yyyyyup." Big Mac said.
"Good. Now scram, before anyone notices us." Discord pulled his hood over his head and rushed past Big Mac, holding the apple pie.
Big Macintosh looked at the bag of drugs.
"Yyyyyup." he said. He put the marijuana into his duffel bag and cantered away with it.

Competitions

"Do you accept our offer?" Flim questioned Big Macintosh and Apple Bloom.
"'Course we do!" Apple Bloom shouted.
"Yyyyyup," Big Macintosh added.
"Then let the competition begin!" Flam cheered. "I assume our prize will be your orchard again, correct?"
"Yyyyyup," Big Macintosh confirmed.
"We could beat y'all faster than Rainbow Dash on a set of roller blades!"
Flim flicked the "on" switch of the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000. It roared, and it sent out it's vaccum tubes to pick the apples.
"Let's go Mac!" Apple Bloom shouted. She galloped off into the orchard, with Big Macintosh following behind.
After a while of picking, Flim and Flam were ahead by five barrels of cider. The vaccum tubes of the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000 were sucking up apples from the back of the orchard.
"Haha!" Apple Bloom chuckled. "They're goin' to the back of the orchard, where all the crummy apples are!"
Before he could could comprehend what Apple Bloom had just said, Big Macintosh saw the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 7000 suck up a small plastic object. He immediatly knew what it was.
"Uhhhh, uh oh..." Big Macintosh said.
"What's wrong, brother?" asked Apple Bloom.
Big Macintosh felt that if he didn't tell his devious secret to Apple Bloom, they couldn't fix the problem, and the ponies would prefer the addicting cider of the Flim Flam Brothers over theirs.
Big Macintosh leaned towards his sister's ear and whispers something to her.
"Great Golden Delicious!" Apple Bloom exclaimed. "This can't be true! I though you were better than that, Mac!"
"Nnnnnope," Big Macintosh sighed, hanging his head.
"We gotta talk about this later, though. Look!" Apple Bloom pointed her hoof towards the hourglass that was being held up by the ponies surrounding the orchard. The sand had almost all gone, and they had about five minutes left.

Solutions

Granny Smith rested in her rocking chair on the porch of her home. She had her suitcase full of items next to her, and she was prepared to leave. She just wanted to enjoy the last few rays of sun that she would get at Sweet Apple Acres.
Suddenly, she heard a loud rumbling in the distances. Slowly lifting her head, Granny Smith inspected the source of noise in the distance. A huge stampede of ponies was approaching the orchard.
"Aaahhhh!" Granny Smith shouted. She braced herself as the crowd jumped the fence and stopped in front of Granny Smith. Apple Bloom and Big Macintosh were in front of the crowd.
"Oh, hello," Granny Smith greeted them sadly.
"Granny, we need you to help us! Do ya have any way to grow apple trees instantly?"
"Um, I may have somethin' to help y'all." Granny Smith grabbed her medical walker, got up, and hobbled to the old shed that the camera never captures in the show. She entered the shed, and emerged a moment later with a spray bottle filled with rainbow liquid.
"This is zap apple growth serum," Granny started. "This should help those trees of yours."
"Thanks Granny!" Apple Bloom shouted. She dashed in to the shed, and came out a moment later with an entire container of the growth serum and many empty spray bottles. She began to fill the bottles with the serum.
"Hey, don't use all of that," Granny Smith intervened. "I need that for the garden I'm gonna start at our new home."
Before long, the container was empty, and Apple Bloom was distributing spray bottles of serum among the ponies. After she was done, she shouted, "Come on everypony! Let's save Sweet Apple Acres!"
All of the ponies, unicorns, and pegasi cheered. They galloped off to go dose the apple plants.
"Well, darn it," Granny Smith sighed. "At least they're usin' it to help our orchard."