The Great and Powerful Trixie's New Servant

"I hate book reorganizing day... Oh if only there was some way I could get out of doing this by babysitting." Spike whined as he looked towards the door. "... I said, if only there was SOME way I could get OUT of doing this by BABYSITTING!" Sadly the door did not comply to his wishes and simply remained a closed door. "Dammit, I always sit an unforeseen moments! Fine, I'll start reorganizing." Spike grabbed the first book, and just then there was a knock on his door, "Thank god!" He tripped over his side table in his excitement to answer the knocking, he dusted himself off and cleared his throat. He then swung open the door, a lovely looking couple and their not so lovely looking kid stood before them.

"Hi, can you watch our sweetpea for a while?" the man asked.

"Sure, how long and what circumstances?"

"Me and my wife have a quick show to do down in Canterlot, in the meantime our daughter will be staying over night, we'll be back to pick her up at seven, is that alright sir?"

"That's a twelve hour stay, you realize this will cost quite a pretty penny right?" Spike asked. Of course Spike wanted their money, but he wasn't that set on ripping people off.

"Oh it's nothing that'll affect our income. In fact, we have the amount of money it'll take right now," the man replied with a smile as he whipped out his wallet, handing Spike a hundred and forty four dollars. Spike was popping such a massive money boner he almost swiped it out of his hand, but the man pulled the cash away, "But, if our daughter happens to call us sounding upset or sad, we will come back very unpleased, and you will go without pay, understood?"

"Yea yea yea, don't worry. Every kid I've sat so far has been more then pleased, I'm sure your daughter will be of no trouble."

The man leaned into Spike, "You have no idea," he whispered to him. He pulled away and handed Spike the money, and the two walked off, leaving their daughter.

"So uh, come on in," Spike said sheepishly, she turned her nose up and walked inside. 'Great, I'm sitting a spoiled rich kid, A.K.A. a guaranteed future bitch.' Spike shut the door behind him, noticing the girl darting her eyes around the place.

"This place is in horrid condition," she began as she tossed her bag beside the door, "Cans and cups set out on the table with missing coasters, the books are completely out of order and all over the place, the furniture looks like it was pulled from some cheesy 90's home, and it reeks like something had defecated recently."

"Well it's not exactly in it's top condition, but it could be worse," Spike replied rubbing the back of his head.

"Not far from it. Trixie has not had dinner yet, go make Trixie something."

"Wait, who's Trixie?"

"Me, Trixie is Trixie. You really are as dumb as you look," she said in disgust, refusing to make eye contact with Spike.

"... Right, what do you want?"

"Trixie supposes you do not have smoked salmon or spicy moroccan shrimp tagine. What do you have?"

"Off the top of my head I know I got a few mini oven baked pizzas and some spaghetti-O's," Spike replied, expecting to be horribly shot down. This kid was malicious, she was so fluent and wordy but had such a bite, especially for an eight year old.

"Great, why not just drop Trixie off at a soup kitchen where smelly homeless people linger and defecate!... Trixie supposes she will have some spaghetti-O's."

"Sure thing madam," Spike said sarcastically as he made his way to the kitchen.

"Finally some respect." Spike threw some a can of spaghetti-O's in the cook pot with some water. 'She thinks she's smart but can't detect sarcasm when she sees it.' Spike kept at the spaghetti-O's, putting them in a bowl once he was finished. Spike walked back into the lobby with her bowl in hand, noticing her fiddling around with the book shelf as he put her bowl down on the living room table.

"What're you..." Spike muttered noticing the books, almost every single one aligned in author's last name. "Did... did you do this?"

"But of course, who else but the oh so resourceful Trixie could do such a task in such little time," she purred.

"I... I can't even begin to thank you!" Spike exclaimed smiling from ear to ear, "Holy shit, I was dreading to do that for so long today and you finished it in like five minutes, you're amazing kid!

"Erm... Yes, T-trixie is quite amazing. Why think otherwise?" she stated, trying to hide her blush.

"For doing that I'm gonna give you a treat from my secret stash of goodies, no-bake peanut butter bars with chocolate glazing. So damn good it'll much your mouth water just looking at it," Spike said rushing back into the kitchen.

"Such barbaric language, must you curse in every sentence you speak?" Trixie nagged.

"Well it's my house my rules. In fact, you can cuss all you want in my house, you can wear your underwear around, you can let any noxious odors pour out your ass or your mouth as you please. Whatever you want kiddo, all I ask is that you don't shit or piss anywhere that's not the bathroom, and to not break anything." Spike said he he tossed her a peanut butter bar. Instead of catching it she only eeped as it smacked her across her temple. Spike hurried over to her, "Shit you alright kid? My bad I thought you'd catch it."

"That's it, Trixie's calling her mother!" she exclaimed.

"No no no no no! Look, I'll do anything you want, just please don't call your parents. This is a lot of money and I don't wanna lose it."

"Hmm... How much does this money mean to you?" she asked, rubbing her forehead.

"Well it feeds me so it means more than a lot actually, it's more like my existence."

The kid let a wicked grin overcome her mischievous little face, "Bow to Trixie."

"Erm... what?" Trixie grinned at him and raised her phone, teasing to type the number of her parents out out. Spike knew she needn't say anymore, if he didn't do as she said she'd call her parents. "Can't believe I'm taking orders from a kid," Spike mumbled to himself as he began to kneel.

"What was that? Speaking back to your money grab now are you?"

"Urgh, whatever. I've been payed more," Spike groaned, his words muffled with his face touching the floor.

"Silence! You shan't speak to Trixie in that manner... In fact, you shall call Trixie, 'The Great and Powerful Trixie!'" she announced, throwing her hands in the air.

"Can I call you TGPT for short?"

"No, and you do not talk to Trixie that way. As punishment," she walked behind him and hopped upon his back, "You must give Trixie a piggyback ride!"

"You gotta be shitting me..." Spike sighed.

"Quiet steed, onward!" Spike sadly played his part, with not much effort. He walked on all fours at a brisk pace, the little twerp giggling away on his back the entire time, kicking at his sides. Imitating gun shut sounds and Indian war cries, kicking even harder.

"This isn't the way a more proper girl should be acting, should it?" Spike moped.

"Oh now I'm taking orders from the horse?"

"Listen kid my knees hurt and my sides are bruised, can't I do something else?"

"You're pathetic, fine. Trixie has grown tired, you must give The Great and Powerful Trixie a foot massage." she ordered.

"I'd sooner blow hot air up a dog's ass," Spike replied flatly.

"What was that? I could've sworn I heard a dumb teenage boy say he wanted a beautiful child's parents to not pay him for his shoddy babysitting job." Spike sighed and got up to get the lotion out of his drawer (Don't ask why he knows it's there), Trixie giggling and snorting as she stripped her shoes and socks off, she was loving the fact she could boss Spike around and make him do just about anything, and it was pissing him off. "Have you ever sat a more fabulous girl other than Trixie?" she asked in a flirtatious tone.

"The side of me that cares about the money I'm getting from this, I'd say no. At the stand point of my actual opinion, every other kid I watched was better then you, even the one that made me break down in public." Spike said as he squirted lotion into his hands.

"What's your definitive answer?"

"Why it's you madam Trixie." he replied sarcastically as he starting rubbing away at her little feet.

"Ah ah, It's The Great and Powerful Trixie to you." she corrected as she laid back and grabbed a magazine from the table.

"Say, I could've sworn I saw you at the toy store a couple of days ago."

"Yes, Trixie was a good girl so she got to pick out some toys while mommy and daddy waited in the car."

"Wait so your parents let you just buy your own toys? Like, 'Oh here's fifty dollars got get something you like.'"

"Fifty?! As if, they give Trixie at least a hundred." she scoffed.

"Well I got a kid several toys for free and didn't even have to pay."

"Less talky, more rubby." Trixie demanded.

Spike kept kneading away at her little soles, until she put the magazine back on the table, "Trixie grows tired of this foot massage."

"What would The Great and Powerful Trixie like to do next?"

"Excellent question... Trixie does not know, Trixie is bored. You are a terrible entertainer to your magnificent guest," Trixie moped.

"Wanna... I dunno, play a board game?"

"You really think Trixie would like to play such lowly games on a cheap piece of cardboard and plywood with the dumbest of missions or objectives?"

"Uh... yes?" Spike replied, not knowing what else to say.

"Fine, what board games do you think Trixie would like?"

"Life, probably not. Monopoly, you'd end up stealing all my money unfairly. Don't Wake Daddy, that game's dumb anyway... Ever play Dungeons and Dragons?"

"Ewh, that is a game for those with no lives or self respect. Why would you think Trixie would want to play?"

"One, because you have no self respect or respect for others so that's a double whammy. Two, it's a make your own adventure so those are always fun. And three, you can play as whatever you want to, for the most part." Spike said cheerfully.

"Even a wizard?" she asked stary eyed.

"Kid, you can be a mother fucking wizard of dragons. You can be literally anything."

"Trixie is intrigued. It is settled, Trixie shall play this Dungeons and Dragons." They spent the next ten minutes filling out a character sheet, pouring most of her points into Intellect and Wisdom. Her character a teenage vampire necromancy wizard, he starting items an antique Staff, four healing potions, a studded cape, and a necklace with an evil reddish glowing alicorn. Spike had already filled out an adventure sheet, he did the very same when Scootaloo was over and her character nearly died, with a few adjustments Spike edited the opening text to better convey her character into the adventure.

"Okay, let me set the scene, 'The Town sought out a noble hero to help rid the Town of their problem with the nightly raids from necromancy bandits. They figured that if anyone knew anything about raising the dead, it would be...' Okay do I really have to say the whole damn thing?"

"Yes you do," Trixie nagged.

"Fine, '... it would be the Great and Powerful Trixie. They searched high and low for her, until finding her at an abandon cathedral for more subjects to summon. They begged her to help with their problem, and with a high amount of reward money she gladly accepted. Though a lowly necromancer, se ha-'

"Hold on!" the steamed little blue haired girl barked, "Lowly?!"

"Well... yea, most heroes start out as under dogs who struggle and make their own name through harrowing stories of ba-"

"Trixie don't care about that! They already know Trixie's prestige back ground with the vampiric clan that my parents began, Trixie should be considered far more then lowly."

"Holy shit, fine, 'She was a kickass fucking wizard and could best anything that tried to... steal and just... or something. I don't know but she was fucking amazing and she went to the cave where the shitty necromancer shit heads were.' Spike improvised

Getting into character she cleared her throat, "I summon the undead to do my bidding!" she declared.

"Okay there are a few corpses hanging around the front so you cast your spell on several of them, roll dice for initiative." Trixie picked up her twenty sided dice and rolled it, rolling a one. "Wow, extreme bad luck. The corpses are given life, but quickly turn on their mistress. They swing for..." Spike rolled three separate times, "Yikes, thirty four hit points, your armor negates twenty one percent so that's twenty seven, which leaves you at... 13 hit points left."

"Are you kidding me!? Trixie wants a redo!"

"You can't do that, it's unfair to the other players and the game!" Spike objected.

"Well the game is dumb and there's no one else but a beautiful little girl and a lowly teenage boy who wastes his time playing RPG's and nerd stuff."

"Okay you think it's bad we'll just stop playing," Spike said aggressively and starting shuffling the pieces back into the box.

"Trixie is calling calling her parents!"

"Fine, go ahead and call your fucking parents, and afterwards put yourself to bed. I'm going to sleep, so I can get away from the little satan successfully becoming the bitchiest kid ever with no care of other people's feelings.\," Spike replied as he put the board game away and marched upstairs. Slamming his bedroom door, making the little girl flinch in surprise.

"Dumb fucking kid. Thinks she has the bigger dick cause her parents are paying me, 'Meh Trixie Trixie Trixie, rub Trixie's feet, Trixie thinks your a fat fucking turd, look at me I'm Trixie, Trixie suck her own dick she loves herself so much, meh meh meh meh!'" Spike said aloud to himself as he put on his PJ pants. He shut the light off and threw himself into bed, throwing the blankets over himself with a deep sigh. He was to pissed to fall asleep, to upset, but didn't want to admit it to himself. So he laid there, staring at the ceiling, hands folded over his stomach, trying to listen closely to what was happening downstairs, he didn't hear anything. 'Why do I care if she calls her fucking parents, just toss her out and flip them off once they get here.' Spike heard a knocking at his door, he knew it was the brat, he didn't respond or even get up, he just laid there.

"Answer the door." Spike still did nothing, staring at the ceiling, 'I wonder why they call a sandwich a sandwich... Like it's bread with something in the middle... They should call it like a bread 'something'.' Spike heard her sigh on the other end of the door, "Answer the door... please." Spike's eyes widened a bit, he didn't expect the kid to even know what that word was, let alone what it meant. He knew he was going to regret this, he stood up and opened his door, Trixie in a loose white shirt and blue PJ pants with stars on them. She quickly regained her proper stance, her head slightly tilted upwards, hands behind her back, "Ahem... Trixie has not called her parents. She fells as though... to give you a second chance."

"Wow, I sure am gracious, what else did you want before I slam the door in your face?" Spike replied flatly.

"In exchange for not relaying info on your... not-so-good job, Trixie demands you let her sleep with you."

"So now I'm indebted to you because you unfairly treated me like shit and I got a impatient once? How about this, you just admit that you want to sleep with me and I'll consider it."

"Trixie thinks that... well Trixie is... alright Trixie admits it." she moped.

Spike grinned a little, seeing her finally give in to being nice, "Alright squirt, c'mon," Spike said as he walked back to his bed. The little girl smiled for a brief moment, but soon went serious face again and shut the door behind her. Spike crawled into bed, scooting over to give the kid some room as she then laid down as well. They laid together in silence, "So, you're not gonna say anything mean about my bed? How uncomfortable it is, or how the sheets smell, or maybe how the blankets are too hot? Or maybe you're saving it to belittle me more."

"Trixie likes the bed. And Trixie was only teasing, jeez," she pouted.

"If that's your idea of teasing, I'd hate to see you actually being mean."

"Trixie demands that... I mean, Trixie asks that you cuddle with her."

"As if," Spike scoffed.

"Trixie will put in a good word for Mr. Spike," she added.

"Yea, and then I'd have to babysit you more and get made fun of even more often." She opened her mouth to say something, but slowly shut it, there was nothing she could say to help her proposal so she just rolled over opposite of him. Spike sighed as he turned over and wrapped his arms around her, making her giggle softy a bit and she grabbed his arms accepting the snuggle. "Shut up, I'm just cold is all..."

Spike slowly opened his aching eyes, the sound of knocking ringing in his head. Reality quickly came to him, he was supposed to have Trixie out the door by 7 am, looking down in his arms he saw the very same girl sucking her thumb, clinging to his shirt. He carefully looked behind him, the clock read 7:11, he turned back and gently shook the child awake. "Hey twerp, c'mon your parents are here."

"Five more minutesh..." she moaned.

"We've had eleven minutes extra, your parents are at the door right now. C'mon let's go." She groaned as she pulled herself up, her hair a mess, eyes barely open as she smacked her lips. Spike pulled open his drawer and tossed her a brush, "Make yourself look semi-decent while I go chat with your parents." He then opened his door and paced himself downstairs into the lobby, the knocking getting slightly harsher.

"Couldn't you just open the door?" a feminine voice asked.

"I could but he's locked it." Spike unlocked the door and opened it, "Ah, there you are. Sorry we were late, but I suppose you are late as well. So no foul done."

"Yea sorry about that," Spike chuckled, "Forget to put on an alarm last night. I checked on her before I came down, she's still asleep."

"Was she of any trouble?" the woman asked nervously.

"Well the kid's got a bit of a bite to her, can't say she was too perfect the entire night. But for the most part she was fine." The two turned their attention to the staircase, Spike turned around as well to see Trixie smiling a bit, "There's the little squirt now."

"Did you have fun sweetie, anything bad happen?"

"Trixie did not call you therefor Trixie was fine. Why ask if you already knew the answer?"

"Well if she's acting like this I think everything went over well. Thank you Spike, we look forward to having you sit her again soon," the man replied with a smile. "Come now sweetie, you can change in the car, we have to get home so we can have our scheduled 7:30 breakfast."

"Yes father." Trixie walked down the rest of the steps, her parents already on their way back to the car. Trixie gave Spike a quick hug, "Trixie would like to apologize for the events of last night."

"I know you're trying kid, don't worry about it. You're no longer the worst kid I sat now."

"Really, then who?" she asked cocking her head.

"I'll just say watch your ass if you meet a girl named Rarity..." Spike groaned rubbing the back of his head, "You'd better get going."

"Bye mister Spike!" she said as she rushed out the door. Spike smiled a bit as he propped himself on the doorway, watching the little brat run to her parents. Maybe he made a bit of progress with her. "Daddy did not get Trixie a souvenir!? How dare you!" she barked.

Or maybe he didn't...

Author's Note

This one took a little longer then expected, it was also more lengthier than expected too. But here it is, in all it's glory, I might take a little break before deciding who I want to do next .