Shinji Ikari goes to pony land (and other NGE X MLP Short Stories)

THIS

IS

FUCKING

STUPID

So one winter day Gendo was bored as shit, his son was at some private high school in Tokyo, he was currently laid off from work, and his wife was on a business trip overseas. So yeah, he was bored.

So he decided to go for a walk.

He put on his coat and boots and went outside, locking the door behind him of course.

When he walked by an alleyway, some shady looking guy called out to him.

"Hey, you want some weed?" shady guy said.

"Who, me?" Gendo asked.

"Yeah, you." Shady guy responded.

"Hmmmm" Gendo hummed.

He thought about it... Well, it is pretty boring, being home alone and all that, maybe I could use something like this to calm down and kill some time...

"Alright, I'll give it a try, how much for a little?" Gendo said to the shady guy.

"6800 yen man. I know it's a little pricey, but this is  some really strong shit, I guarantee you'll love it. I'll throw in some paper for free too." Shady guy answered.

"Alright... Sounds good..." Gendo said.

Gendo handed over the cash, and the guy gave Gendo a small bag of marijuana, and some paper, which Gendo stowed in his coat pocket.

Gendo walked home to smoke his new weed.

Gendo got home, and googled gow to roll a joint, after figuring out how he went into his house's basement, rolled a joint, and lit it up.

He started smokin' that shit, about three minutes in it started to take effect...

WHAT GENDO IS SEEING

A pink pony came up to Gendo, and started talking to him.

"Hi I'm Pinkie Pie, and I'm a talking pony that likes parties!" She said.

"Woahhh, dude, this stuff's great, heheheh... Hey there little pony, my name's Gendo Ikari..." Gendo said.

"Well Gendo it's nice to meet you, you wanna like, hug or something?" Pinkie asked.

"Sure, sounds cool man." Gendo said.

Gendo and Pinkie started hugging it out.

WHAT'S REALLY HAPPENING

Gendo hugged the vacuum cleaner.

GENDO

"Whoa, I'm like, so hungry right now."

Hey there Twilight, what are you up to?"

"Like, you should really get in that robot Shinji, I'm not forcing you or anything, but it would be pretty chill if you would."

So yeah, shit like this happened all night, until Gendo finally went to sleep on the floor with his vacuum cleaner in his arms.

THE NED

GENDO SMOKED WEED EVERY WEEK AFTER THAT DAY WHEN NOBODY WAS AROUND, ONE DAY HIS WIFE CAUGHT HIM SMOKING WEED, AND ASKED FOR SOME TOO, CRAZY SHIT HAPPENED, I CAN TELL YOU THAT, MAYBE I'LL DO A LONGER BONUS STORY OF THAT SOMETIME.