Shinji Ikari goes to pony land (and other NGE X MLP Short Stories)

THIS

IS

FUCKING

STUPID

Todizzle was goin ta be a straight-up dope day, straight-up dope indeed, at least fo' some people...

Shinji Ikari was a aiiight kid, yep, normal, his fuckin lil' daddy abandoned his ass ta live wit his cold-ass mackdaddy/grandparents afta his crazy-ass momma took a dirt nap up in a 'accident', suddenly one dizzle all dem muthafuckin years later some bangin' chick takes his ass ta peep his fuckin lil' daddy n' a giant monsta thang called a angel beat down japan, Shinji meets his fuckin lil' dad, deal happens, Shinji now has ta pilot a funky-ass biomech thang called unit 01 dat has his crazy-ass momz ass inside it n' fight tha angels dat is threatenin mankind or some shit.

So then da perved-out muthafucka starts livin wit tha bangin' mutha figure dat brought his ass ta his fuckin lil' dad, whose name is Misato Katsuragi by tha way.

Then he meets dis submissive hottie named Rei Aianami, whoz ass also has ta pilot a giant biomech thang called unit 00.

Then some biiiatch from Germany named Asuka Langley Soryu, she a funky-ass biiiatch.

Anyway, they fight angels, also tha apocalypse is inevitable cuz Rei will turn mah playas tha fuck into tang.

So dem hoes was up in some weird place practicin bein tang'd.

"Alright so here we go up in 3 2 1." Shinjiz daddy holla'd.

Shinjiz daddy pressed a funky-ass button, n' mah playas turned tha fuck into ghettofab orange tang includin his dirty ass.

Shinjiz daddy pressed tha button again n' again n' again despite bein liquid n' mah playas turned back ta normal.

Well, not everyone...

"Yo where dat baka Shinji be at yo?" Asuka asked.

"I don't give a shit." Shinjiz daddy holla'd.

"Okay then lets keep going." Rei holla'd.

"Where tha fuck be I?" Shinji holla'd.

Dude was obviously up in some weird, original, never used forest.

Suddenly a manticore came right tha fuck outta nowhere.

"OH SHIT, THIS IS SO ORIGINAL." Shinji yelled.

Shinji looked round fo' suttin' ta use fo' self-defence.

On tha ground da perved-out muthafucka saw a spoon, wit tha lyrics "Zfg was here" engraved on tha handle.

Shinji quickly grabbed tha spoon, n' pointed it all up in tha Manticore up in a menacin way.

"Stay back man! I be warnin you, I gots a spoon!" Shinji holla'd.

"Nah dude, fuck dis shit." tha manticore holla'd.

Suddenly tha Manticore turned tha fuck into a Angel. No not tha religious kind, I mean tha Evangelion kind.

"OH SHIT!" Shinji holla'd.

Shinji ran tha fuck outta there.

In tha distizzle da perved-out muthafucka saw a town, which da ruffneck decided ta check up cuz why tha fuck not?

Suddenly a pink pony flew at his ass wit lightnin speed.

"HI THERE I'M PINKIE PIE AND I LIKE PARTIES AND SHIT AND WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT BEHIND YOU OH MUTHAFUCKA HEY THERE PERSON WHO IS CURRENTLY READING THIS I AM BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL AND IT'S SO ORIGINAL AND FUNNY LOL ECKS DEE." Pinkie Pie holla'd.

"Ironic shitpostin is still shitpostin playa!" Shinji holla'd ta pinkie pie.

"WHY DID YOU DO THAT YOU HURT MY FEELINGS YOU MEANIE." Pinkie holla'd.

"Because you not funky!" Shinji holla'd.

"Yo don't rap shiznit ta Pinkie Pie!" Some rainbow biiiatch holla'd.

"Dum diddy-dum, here I come biaaatch! Who tha fuck is yo slick ass?" Shinji asked.

"I be Rainbow Dash n' I be tha dopest at flyin n' I be soopa-doopa fast n' I be goin ta be up in tha bonerwolts (you owe me Moldy (not straight-up, itz cool.)) cuz lesbians!"

"Yeah how tha fuck interesting." Shinji holla'd sarcastically.

"What tha fuck did you just say ta me you lil biiiatch, biatch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of mah class up in tha Navy Seals, n' I’ve been involved up in a shitload of secret raidz on Al-Quaeda, n' I have over 300 confirmed kills. I be trained up in gorilla warfare n' I’m tha top sniper up in tha entire US armed forces. Yo ass is not a god damn thang ta me but just another target. I'ma wipe you tha fuck up wit precision tha likez of which has never been peeped before on dis Earth, mark mah fuckin lyrics. ?" Rainbow dash holla'd.

Bitch jumped at Shinji n' started whoopin his ass up until he passed out.

Shinji raised up in a funky-ass basement all tied up.

"Oh shiznit where be I?" Shinji asked.

"In mah basement." Purple Unicorn holla'd.

"Dum diddy-dum, here I come biaaatch! Who tha fuck is yo slick ass?" Shinji axed da euwnikorn.

"I be Twilight Sparkle!" Twilight Sprinklez holla'd.

"Oh cool, wanna be playas?" Shinji asked.

"No! Yo ass where a funky-ass big-ass meanie ta mah playa!" Twilight Sporks holla'd.

"I be bout ta apologize." Shinji replied.

"Really, biatch? Cool, I guess we can be playaz now!" Twilight holla'd.

"Oh boy!" Shinji holla'd.

Twilight untied Shinji

"I be goin ta introduce you ta all mah playas!" Twilight holla'd.

"Okay!" Shinji yelled.

So Shinji n' Twilight skipped outside, n' ran off ta hook up Twilightz playas, straight-up obliviouz of tha Angel dat was beatin tha livin shiznit outta Ponyville up in tha distance, n' tha terrified screamz of tha suckas up in tha attack.

Shinji n' Twilight now sat at a table up in sugarcube corner wit some other gay ponies.

"Shinji these is mah playas." Twilight holla'd.

"HELLO I AM FLUTTERSHY AND I AM SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO ANIMALS." Some stick of butter holla'd straight-up on tha fuckin' down-lowly.

"I be Rainbow Dash n' our crazy asses have already met." Rainblow Dryer holla'd.

"I be Raritizzle n' I wanna make threadz fo' yo thugged-out ass. Faggot." Marshmallow holla'd.

"IamPinkiePieandwealreadymet." Pinkie Pie holla'd.

"Do you gotta rap like that?" Shinji asked.

"Yes yes y'all." Cotton Candy replied.

"Anyways, ahm Applejack n' ahm jus a funky-ass bakroun' character or suttin' n' ah like dem applez hyuk." Inferior Mud Pony Applejack holla'd.

Suddenly tha roof came off sugarcube corner.

"HEY KID I'M CELESTIA, I'M A GOD OR SOMETHING, THERE ARE MONSTERS EVERYWHERE AND I NEED YOU TO PILOT AN EVANGELION MADE FROM THESE FAGGY PONIES TO KILL THEM NOW LET ME ZAP Y'ALL WITH MY MAGIC." Sunbutt holla'd.

"Wait, what?" Twilight holla'd.

"GET IN THE FUCKING ROBOT YOU FUCKING PUSSY ASS FAGGOT" Celestia yelled at Shinji.

"NOT AGAIIIIN!" Shinji yelled.

So Celestia zapped dem wit her magic, n' a Evangelion came outta sugar cube corner dat Shinji was piloting.

THE END

MOTHER FUCKING CREDITS

And then it turned tha fuck into a Evangelion fanfic except ponies

And then it turned tha fuck into a thugged-out dubs thread

MADE BY KRAGOR

A CROSSOVER WITH NEON GENESIS EVANGELION AND MY LITTLE PONY

REVIEWS

"FUCK THIS SHIT" -Some muthafucka

"MUTHAFUCKA THAT WAS PRETTY FUCKING BAD" -Other muthafucka

"WE LIKE TO MAKE UP BULLSHIT NEWS AND GREATLY ALTER THE TRUTH OF ACTUAL STUFF OR SOMETHING" -Fox Shit Faggot

"I'M MOTHERFUCKING CANADIAN, WAIT WHY AM I REVIEWING MY OWN SHIT" -Kragor

FUCK THIS GAY ASS SHIT, I'M OUT

Well guess what tha fuck motherfuckers.

I came back.

With a much shorter, n' much mo' wack chapter.

Shinji woke up.

"Shinji, you aiiiight man?" Zfg axed Shinji.

"No way dude, I like, had tha weirdest dream." Shinji holla'd.

"Yeah dude, thatz probably props ta all tha LCL shiznit you smoked." Zfg holla'd.

"Oh yeah, now itz comin back ta mah dirty ass." Shinji holla'd.

"Yo dude, you wanna race some TP?" Shinji axed Zfg.

"TP sucks up in speedrunning, how tha fuck bout OoT." Zfg holla'd.

"Yo ass is right man." Shinji holla'd.

So Shinji n' Zfg raced Zelda: Ocarina of Time n' lived happily eva after.

THE END

Why tha fuck did I link a Co$mo run up in tha original, I be such a gangbangin' finger-lickin' disgrace.

But you know what, MM is better, so fuck OoT.

Youtube Video