Talk To Markiepoo About This One

[Note: this was found in the Documents folder, alone, bearing the title 'don't you fucking read this, Dan'. I read it. Bitch.]

   Fluttershy was a fucking wizard grenade. The only problem was that she still had flesh, so it really hurt her to be that grenade. It also hurt her that her husband Twilight was sexing Owlouisious or fuckin' whatever in the corner while she watched. She sighed and fell into the floor, becoming dark matter.

   And that's how Equestria was imploded.

   Anyhoo, Applejack was making out with Rarity to a lesser degree and was covered in honey and baked beans. Speaking of, is that a good combination? Sounds like mint and berries. Just wouldn't go well together.

   Twilight turned around to the sobbing Fluttershy and shouted "Hey. Because the world is round, it makes me high."

   "B-but the world ISN'T round," Fluttershy cried, twisting about madly on the floor like a sexy yellow eel. "It's the shape of Applejack's baked beans."

   Applejack turned around, causing Rarity to fade from existence. "Fuck."

   "Yeah," Twilight and Twilight replied in tandem. "She wasn't, though."

   "To hell with y'all. She totally was."

   "Not according to the Council of the Absolute."

   "Well, to hell with them, too."

   The Council appears, also covered in honey, but with 2 power and 3 toughness amongst the three of them (Aaron's a weak little bastard). "We banned the word 'hell'."

   "Fuck."

   "Bye."

   Twilight left the library that day, unsure of when she would return, if ever. Events there had gotten simply too... Dan, stop fucking reading my journal.