Equestria's Doom

Rainbow, Will and I proceeded down the path towards the Everfree forest sparking conversation here and there when finally I asked, "So do either of you have any experience dealing with demonic presences?"

"Define demonic." Rainbow replied.

"Well, if demonic means killing Hitler clones dressed in black robes and throwing balls of magic at you; than yes I suppose I do have some experience." Will said sarcastically.

"Damn, I really should have payed attention in history class. Anyway Rainbow Dash tell us about yourself." I said admiring the scenery.

"Hm, where to start. Ah okay, first off I'm a pegasus so that means I help make the weather next I'm the fastest pony in Equestria.-"

"Really how fast can you run? Because I can run seventy-five  miles an hour; probably a result of Ingesting souls and drinking random chemicals I find on the floor."

"Dude. What the fuck?" Will calmly spoke as he staired at me.

"No; I don't run I fly. How fast I fly I have no idea, but I can create a sonic rainboom. Wanna see?" Rainbow asked not waiting for an answer as she took flight. She flew higher and higher until eventually she started to dive; faster and faster until eventually an ear splitting boom had sounded from above accompanied by a rainbow colored shock wave and Rainbow Dash leaving a rainbow colored trail behind her. Just seconds before she collided with the ground she somehow pulled off a ninety degree turn and headed towards the Everfree. Before I knew it everything became a blur and I was sprinting or rather galloping full speed after her. I'll never forget the look on her face when another large boom sounded and I caught up with her, trailing a monochrome green rainbow behind me. We suddenly stopped just before colliding with a tree.

"Damn, that was a hell of a lot faster than seventy-five miles per hour; I guess it has something to do with being a pony." I said catching my breath.

"Oh my gosh, that was awesome! You just made a sonic rainboom... by galloping!" Rainbow dash complimented me setting herself down.

Around five minutes later Will showed up out of breath and complimented "God damn you; you bastard! You made me run three fucking miles to catch up with you!"

"Um guys, were here." Rainbow Dash announced quietly facing the other direction towards our destination.

"All right here's the plan. First we find the castle, second we make our way to the spear, third and most importantly: kill all son of bitches." I explained to my new friends.

"That reminds me, here Rainbow Dash. I took this MP40 off one of those Mecha-Nazis back there you'll need it." Will said removing the gun and a bag of ammo from his back and handing it to rainbow dash. Will began to explain how to operate the weapon (Remember there are no guns in Equestria!) while I surveyed the forest looking for any hell-spawn or Nazis.

"Alright I got it, I got it." Rainbow announced pushing Will away clearly annoyed.

"Alright fine then, but if I get shot by you I'm going to be pissed!" Will said drawing his Stg44 so we could proceed into the forest. Equipping my shotgun we proceeded onward into the depths of the forest.

"We've been walking forever where is this place?" Will groaned.

"Not to much further. I just get a sinking feeling something bad is going to happen." Rainbow voiced.

"Why would you say that!?" I asked angrily.

"What?"

"The sinking feeling part! Look, the Devil has a bad sense of humor and if you say something like that; we'll probably end up in-"

"Quicksand!" Will shouted suddenly.

"Well that was a little over dramatic... oh wait, your serious... God damn it! Okay, here's the plan shoot the quicksand!"

"How is that going to work!?" Will asked in a pissed off voice.

"Guys, I can fly. Why don't I just pull you out?" Rainbow inquired.

"Because It would be less badass!" I said pulling out my rocket launcher and firing it straight at my feet. The rocket exploded at the bottom of the quicksand pool flinging it everywhere and leaving us in an empty hole.

"How did that even work?" Will asked cleaning sand out of his ear.

"Yuck I got some in my mouth. Behind you!" Rainbow spat.

I spun around and was met face to face with a zombified space marine carrying a Famas assault rifle.

"Brass knuckles I choose you! Or um, spiked horse shoe?" I cried shrugging my shoulders and impaling the zombie through the head.

"Panzerschrecks; Feuer!" Came from behind us.

"Shit heads up." I said ducking.

"My turn." Will said as he pulled out a knife and threw it at the antitank soldier. It impaled his hoof and pined him to a tree.

"Holy shit dude! Here try this on for size." I offered handing Will my berserk medkit. Instantly around thirty knives flew from Will's hands and traced the outline of the Nazi's body along the tree causing him to faint from shock.

"Where did you learn to do that?" Rainbow asked lowering her MP40.

"In a Nazi prison cell. Except it was with a spoon and picture of Hitler... Look, I had a lot of free time, Okay?" Will said leaning against a rock and earning a raised I brow from us.

"Um, Will? I think you found the castle." I said starring at the rock or in actuality the mountain and the castle on top of it.

"Come on guys let's go!" Rainbow cheered as she flew towards the mountain.

"When I grow some wings I'll join you!" I yelled after her looking for another route. Carved into the side of the mountain was a set of large steel doors straight from the Phobos moon base.

"All right I need a red key card to unlock the entrance." I announced spinning around to face my friends.

"Where are we going to find a key card around?-" Will half finished.

"Never mind I have an idea!" I said pulling out my trusty chainsaw. I searched everywhere for a zombie and finally found one. Taking the chainsaw I swiftly decapitated the zombie and pulled the skin off his skull.

"Gross, what the fuck dude?" Will asked with a confused look on his face.

"Does this look red enough?" I asked ignoring them.

"What are you doing?" Rainbow asked moving out of my way.

"I wonder..." I asked aloud pushing the skull against the door causing it to open.

"So those skull key cards are actually skulls. Interesting." I said discarding the decapitated head.

"Were lost aren't we?" Rainbow asked after about fifteen minutes.

"Well yeah... I hate mazes." I said chuckling as I peaked around the corner.

"Tell me about it." Will said as he covered our rear.

When we reached a fork in the path Rainbow suggested "We should split up so we can find the exit faster."

"Demon!" will shouted and followed up with Stg44.

"I'll just be a sec, nothing can go wrong." Rainbow dash said rounding the corner.

"Wait, Rainbow that's a..." I began to yell just as she was engulfed in the green light of a teleporter, "...bad idea." Will and I ran for the teleporter but found only a wall in its place.

"Shit." We said in unison.