Discord's New Toy

I love being a powerful magical being. I can pretty much do whatever I want. At least within the parameters of my agreement with the ponies. And whenever I want to bend the rules, I can just go dark and silent, and nopony's the wiser. The only time I could ever get caught was if Celestia or Luna were here. And if they knew where I was. And looked directly at me. So chances of being caught were null.

I slithered down the wall and looked through the broken window. What I saw didn't surprise me in the least. Fluttershy comforting a distraught Isaac. I was a bit jealous, but what was there to be jealous about? I squashed that thought with a mental flyswatter. Fluttershy was whispering soothing words and holding the sobbing figure. I felt a twinge of guilt when I looked at his face, but then I remembered I wasn't going to keep him here forever. Just until I had had enough. Or if he did something rash. Like hurl a pony through a window. Well, even then I would probably watch the show, while simultaneously making sure no one bled to death.

"I- I just don't know what I'll do... What if there's no way to get back home?"

"There, there. Everything will be just fine. We'll bring you to Princess Celestia and see what she knows."

He let go of her and studied her face in confusion. "Princess Celsestia? What about the queen? Or the king?"

Fluttershy chuckled at that. "We've never really had one of those.Well, there was a King Discord a few thousand years ago, but that was different. In fact, we only had one princess until recently. Now we have Princess Luna, who raises the moon. Princess Celestia raises the sun.

"Oh I see. So they're like your deities." He looked glum at that for some reason. Then I remembered that no one had ever physically met or talked a human deity. Those guys preferred to govern from the shadows for whatever reason. I'll never understand it. And of course they didn't even give ME the time of day. I thought I was a major force in the celestial playing field, but I guess I'm not important enough to talk to. You know. Keeping order in every place in existence by being the other side of the coin. Whatever. I continued to study the pair.

"Well, I suppose you could call them that. I mean, their magical powers are beyond anything I've ever seen, even Twilight's magic just pales in comparison to what they can do. It's so...cool. But Twilight is better at magic than any other unicorn I've ever met. It's her special talent after all. Either way, the Princesses prefer to be referred to as just Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, not goddesses. They're much too modest for that."

"You talk like you've met them." I smiled mischievously at that. Here comes the bomb shell.

"I know, it's pretty amazing. I've actually met and talked to both the princesses on a few occasions."

"You...what? How? They're goddesses aren't they? When...did you meet them?"

"Well the first time was after we became the Elements of Harmony and freed Princess Luna from the grasp of Nightmare Moon. That was very exciting. I've only been that scared while facing down Discord. At least he's just a joker, not evil, like Nightmare Moon was."

Isaac looked very, very confused. I was pleased. "So wait. These are all the names of gods and goddesses? So it's like the old Greek and Roman legends...Do you worship them?"

Fluttershy smiled and shook her head. "No, we love them. At least the ones that haven't tried to kill us. Or have at least made up for it. What are Greeks and Romans?"

"Ancient human societies. Just an old city and a country at this point. No longer dominating the planet..." He trailed off, with a very confused look on his face.

"Is that what you're called?"

"Huh?"

"Hu... human. That's what you call yourselves?"

"Um, yeah. There aren't more people here? Have you ever even heard of my kind?"

"I'm so, so sorry. No. The only thing even remotely like you are the monkeys in the southern nations. Like Zebrica. And they don't speak. At least, not with words."

I noticed that he had finally stopped crying. He sighed heavily. "Well, I suppose I've dealt with worse." That was a lie and he knew it. He was just putting on a brave face for my little pony friend. That's my Isaac! Now I remember why I chose you. Most other people would've just shut down at this point, but not you! He continued, "Well, I suppose I ought to greet the others. Just get it over with." He stood up to his full height causing Fluttershy gasp quietly and look up at his towering figure.

I smiled and turned to slither back up to the roof, becoming visible as I went. I saw Rainbow Dash, who was looking at me expectantly. "So, what's he like? Does he eat meat?"

"Yes." I chuckled at the horrified look she was giving me. "Don't worry about it though. He wouldn't eat something that talks back to him. In fact, he probably doesn't even hunt. Trust me, if I were you, I just wouldn't think anything of it."

She still looked a little worried as I said, "You probably shouldn't tell anyone I was here. At least not in present company." She nodded consentingly, drawing a hoof across her mouth. "Oh, by the way, he and Fluttershy are heading back to the meet the others. you should probably get in there."

"Oh shoot! Why didn't you tell me sooner!?" She dashed off the roof and back into the house slamming the door behind her. If I had blinked I would've missed it. I chuckled. You had to admire that pony's speed.

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I felt slightly apprehensive as I nudged the door to the kitchen open. The first thing I noticed was Pinkie eating the last of my Lucky Charms. The white unicorn was berating her in hushed tones. I caught something about there maybe being meat in it. I chuckled and said, "Don't worry. It's just cereal. With way too much sugar in it." At that, all the ponies looked up at me. They all saw me standing at my full height, giving noises of awe. They looked slightly intimidated, so I sat down to remain on eye level. That put them at ease, kind of. Well, the pink one was already as relaxed as she could be, judging by how much she was jumping up and down and smiling. Not knowing what to say, I just stared awkwardly until the purple unicorn walked forward.

Smiling, she opened with, "Pleased to meet you. My name is Twilight Sparkle. But you can just call me Twilight. These are my friends Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and where's-oh! There she is. Rainbow Dash." She pointed a hoof at each of them in turn and finally at the cyan pegasus who zoomed into the kitchen, smiling sheepishly. "Oh, and I believe you've already met Fluttershy." She said, gesturing to the butter colored pegasus beside me.

I decided to tell a little about myself in my introduction. "Well, Twilight, my name is Isaac miller. My full name is Isaac Vasquez Lee Miller."

"Fascinating! Absolutely amazing! Your name is much longer than any pony I've ever met! Please explain it it to us!"

I smiled and rubbed the back of my head. "Well my family history is a long and boring one. I can probably explain it if you want, though."

Twilight nodded eagerly, but Applejack said, "Hold on now. I'm sure that's something we all wanna hear about." Earning an eye-roll from Rainbow Dash. "But I think I speak for most of us right now when Ah say Ah'm more interested in how you got here."

Twilight blushed and smiled saying, "Yes, yes of course. We need to figure out how to help you. But...if we can get some studying done along the way that'd be great." The others stared. "Well, this is a great opportunity! But first priority is of course finding out what happened!"

I opened my mouth to explain what happened just before I got here, but Rainbow Dash interjected, "Well hold up a sec. There's one issue that's bugging me. Your teeth. Do you eat meat?"

A tense quiet filled the room. Oh God, what am I supposed to say to THAT? These were ponies, so if they're anything like Earth horses, they're herbivores. I broke the silence with, "Well...uh...yeah. Nothing that talks though." I chuckled awkwardly. They continued to stare, Twilight still smiling, still fascinated. Scientist type. Fluttershy nodded understandingly. The rest were looking on with fear and disgust, except Pinkie Pie. Sheesh. Nothing phased that pony. To my relief, Fluttershy came to the rescue and addressed the rest of the group.

"Now before we jump to any conclusions, you all have to understand that that's just the way he is. It's the way he was raised and there's nothing we can do about it. But, um," She turned to face me and continued, "We'll have to import meat from the Griffin Kingdom. Or maybe a bow and arrows for hunting, that is, if you can manage it."

"Well, um..." I glanced at the hard look Rainbow Dash was giving me. "Listen, it's not any trouble. I don't really need meat all that much. Also, I've never hunted with a bow before, so yeah. I'd probably just get lost or something." A part of me was crying on the inside. Bacon was delicious. When I could afford it. "And uh, I've never eaten a horse or pony before, so no worries there!" A vegetable diet was a tall order, but I figured it's best not to burn bridges when dealing with aliens. Especially when living in their world, if only for a little while. And doubly so if they're capable of magic. Besides, I might be able to sneak a few trips to this "Griffin Kingdom."

They seemed reassured that I wasn't going to eat them, but they were still looking on with a mixture of apprehension and curiosity. Couldn't really fault them there. I'd be nervous in a room with a talking bear.

"Soooo...did you wanna know how I got here?

"That'd be appreciated pardner."

"Alright then. So it all started when...." I went on to explain my life before I got my mind was enveloped in a haze of multicolored ponies and...chocolate milk? Why does that keep coming to mind? Anyway, I explained to them about my jog, bumping into Kane, the following dream about Kane and my strangely vivid conversation with him, and then waking up here.

"Oh and he had this weird button on his lapel. It was a circle with a bunch of arrows coming out of it. And it was red."

Twilight said, "Well I've never seen or heard of a symbol like that. And Kane isn't exactly a common name here, so I can't help you there. At least not until I look through of a few of my books."

With a worried face, Rarity added, "You said he was in your dreams Mr. Miller? Well that doesn't mean he's as powerful as Princess Luna, but he certainly has a few of her powers. If not more."

All the ponies looked distraught at this. Even Pinkie had stopped smiling and said, "Well if he's as powerful as Luna, this might turn into a teensy bit of a problem."

"A 'teensy bit of a problem?'" Rainbow Dash exclaimed, "Pinkie, this could be serious! We could be dealing with another Nightmare Moon! From some other world, so we have no idea how strong this "Kane" guy is! Who knows, he might even be like Discord, judging how much he messed up Isaac's life! I mean, look at this place!"

I blushed and opted to say nothing about the condition of my apartment. It was in the exact same condition before I'd ever even met Kane, except that it somehow ended up in the woods. God, it must look ugly on the outside, since it was in a building. Twilight asked, "Is there anyone who could maybe help from your world Isaac?"

Eager to get off the topic of my foul apartment, I replied, "Well, I'm sure people will find it interesting that there's a chunk missing out of my apartment building. Other than that, people won't know where I am. We don't really have magic where I come from." All the ponies except Twilight gasped at this.

Applejack looked startled and said, "No magic? How do the plants grow?"

After that I was assaulted by a cacophony of questions.

"Who raises the sun?"

"Who lights up the stars at night?"

How do you all control the weather?"

"How do-"

"Girls, girls! Calm down!" Twilight nearly had to shout over the endless barrage of questions. "I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for all of this. Now Isaac, when you say no magic, do you mean no magic or do you just mean no spells?"

"When I say no magic, I mean no spells, no nothing. Everything in my world works by itself, without magic. I mean, look at those clouds outside. They're moving. Is that weird to you?"

Rainbow Dash said, "Yeah, and it should be pretty weird to you too! This is only place in Equestria where they move like that. We pegasi move the clouds ourselves."

"What? No way. How can you touch them? It's just water vapor." All the ponies stared in stunned disbelief. I was confused as well. How can you touch a cloud?

Twilight Sparkle nodded her head, as if confirming her suspicions. "Yes that's what I thought. When I levitated you into your room earlier, your soul had absolutely no magical experience at all."

The others exclaimed at this. Prominent among them was Rarity who said, "Isaac, if you don't mind, I'd like to examine you with a magical field of my own."

I was a bit apprehensive at this, but nodded. If they had wanted to hurt me, they would've done it when I was in panic mode. Her horn glowed briefly and a light blue aura surrounded me. It felt tingly and warm. It was a bit like being wrapped in a blanket, if that blanket were made of air. It kind of tickled. I giggled a little as Rarity continued to furrow her brow in concentration. The others stared expectantly. The aura disappeared, leaving me with a slightly chilly feeling.

Rarity looked at me with wide eyes and said to the others, "It's true. His soul...besides Twilight's levitation spell, it's never been touched by magic. Not once."

The ponies looked at me with...pity. I was puzzled. "Well, it's not a big deal. I mean, I've got these." I flexed my hands. Continuing, I pointed to my head, "And this. Trust me, we've have been getting along fine without uh...magic. In fact, check this out." I pulled out my iPhone and and scrolled through my music filed until I found Stylo.

"Woooow!" They said in unison.They looked at it with amazement, particularly Twilight. She asked, "It's portable electricity, like a flashlight. How do you power it without a magical charge?"

"Well um...we burn oil at power plants to produce energy...and then we distribute that energy using copper wires...and then I plug my phone into the wall and boom! Electricity!" I grinned, hoping my rudimentary knowledge of how the power grid worked was good enough.

"Where do you get all that oil?"

I opened my mouth to explain but quickly shut it. I had suddenly realized that this world is very different to my own. Weird, even. I've got a lot of explaining to do.