The Wolf and the Unicorn

"In Vino Veritas" -- Pliny the Elder 50AD

"What the hell?!"

Everywhere I touched, my hand was met with warm fur.  My other hand just didn't want to move as I sat up.  No matter how I tugged at it, the pony gripping it hugged tighter.  As my eyes cleared, I could barely make out a banner that said "Happy Housewarming Hex!" on it.  At least that answered the where part.  Who was something that I couldn't figure out, as there was a mint colored pony wrapped around my wrist.  Of course, she just had to be the one with a lyre imprinted on her flank.  Pinkie had warned me about her.

As I looked around, there were several ponies sprawled out on the floor of what I assume was my new living room.  Overall, I liked the design with its hardwood accents and cream colored paint.  If only I could get rid of the furry pastel colored rugs that were snoring here and there.  Gently, slowly, I teased one finger after another out of Lyra's grip.  For a creature without hands, these ponies certainly could get a grip on something when they wanted to.  Still, by being exceedingly careful, I finally wiggled out of her grasp.

I stumbled to my feet and stepped through the passed out ponies, trying to find a bedroom, or better yet a bathroom.  Down to the left I found a small kitchen, but no place to lay down.  Back the other way I trudged, only to end up at a nearly closed wooden door.  Peeking in, I saw a large bed that was free of ponies.  That was my goal.  Left foot.  Okay, now the right.  Don't faceplant or pass out.  The crimson bedspread just out of my reach.  One foot then the other until my knees touched the human sized bed and I fell face first into it.  The soft bed taking me to sleep as soon as I touched.

I never did hear the shower running as sleep dragged me into its depths.  Or the warm body crawling into bed with me.  I barely stirred when the warm pillow crawled out of bed a few hours later.

When I woke up, my headache was gone, and there was a parchment note on the pillow next to me.  Why was there a note on my pillow?  What or Who did I do last night?  Naturally, I grabbed the letter as quick as my fingers would work.  The paper was incredibly smooth, and that should have been a hint.  Moreso was the words contained within.

Hex,

I had a wonderful time at the party last night and had no idea humans could dance like that.  Or do the other things you did.  I still want to finish our little chat from yesterday though.  I'll meet you in your garden one of these nights.  By the way, you are very warm at night.  Hope I didn't wake you when I left.

XOXOXO,

Luna

Oh sweet jesus.  Celestia is going to kill me.

I stared at the page for a few minutes, reading it over and over, front and back, focused on how Celestia was going to toss me into the sun.  I had completely missed a small smudge in the lower right corner.  A smudge that looked like a certain night Princess' cutie mark when held up to the light.  There was something lighter colored in the ink, becoming clearer as I held it closer and closer to the lamp next to the bed.  There was going to be someone else tossed into the sun on this day, and her name was Luna.

Gotcha!  Nothing "bad" happened... yet.

That was all it said in the damn scribble.

I'm going to kill Luna.

I stayed locked in that room relaxing and resting for a few hours.  A few hours that separated me from the assortment of passed out ponies in my house.  Every little bit, I could hear one of them wake up and try to stumble out of the house.  They had to have gotten one hell of a hangover to sleep in until nearly noon.  After a little bit of no noise, I felt it was safe to explore my new home.  Gently, I eased myself off the bed and toward the door that was slowly opened.  A quick look around through a crack in the door showed that I was truly alone.  Perfect.

Now that I was awake, I could enjoy the artistry that went into my home.  The hardwood floors were a dark mahogany color, along with most of the accents on the walls and corners.  Subtle bits of polished brass and ebony were mixed in here and there, making the entire house contrast beautifully with the cream paint.  For a species without hands, the ponies could build one hell of a house.

Through the search of the house, I did come across a few things that I found curious or just downright neat.  The ice chest must have been magically cooled as somepony had left it open all night, yet everything was still nice and cool within.  It was even stocked ahead of time with things I'd find delicious.  That could have been why it was left open all night.  Somepony objecting to the meat eater's fridge.  The neat thing was the bathroom.  They had over engineered everything.  Even the shower was large enough to house a princess and then some.  The tile was  a dusky blue similar to the night sky with a contrasting white above shoulder height, with silver accents everywhere.  Similar colors to a certain princess.  Considering Luna's statement, that definitely ended with a raised eyebrow on my part.

All of that was forgotten when I opened my closet.  Apparently this was a more thought out plan then I had imagined.  There were clothes in both of my sizes adorning hooks and pegs throughout.  Some in darker forest colors, others in shades designed to contrast with my skin or fur and look damn good doing it.  There was even a dark green, nearly black pair of robes in each size.  The material was too thick and coarse to be considered a bathrobe.  They were for hiding myself in plain view if needed.  There was something else in there though, something strange.  In a small corner on the left side, there was a dark gem imbedded in the paint.

Naturally, I reached out and touched it.  That turned out to be a bad idea as the moment my outstretched fingers made contact, a sharp pain shot through my hand.  I snapped my hand away, and realized I was dripping a small amount of blood.  The damn stone was sharp as hell.  It took me a minute or two to realize that part of the closet had changed.  The section of wall where the robes had hung had vanished, only leaving a pitch black doorway in its wake.  Freaking ponies and their magic.

A sharp knock at the front door snapped me out of staring into the abyss, even as I turned away, I could hear the door opening and hurried steps toward the bedroom.

"Hex are you in here?  Its Twilight, I forgot to tell you something at the party!  Don't touch the stone in your closet."

As I stepped out of the bedroom, all I could do was laugh.

"Twilight, where were you a few minutes ago.  I just touched the damn stone and it cut me," I chuckled, gesturing toward my slightly bloody hand.

"Oh, well I guess you figured it out then.  The gem is the key for your... what did the Princess call it... safe... yes, the key to your safe.  She got the idea from your memories about storing your weapons.  Anypony with skill could open one of your safes, so she created a magical one that only you and a few other special ponies could get into."

I just had to stare at her.  That answered some, but not the important part.

"Ok, so who designed a safe that slices your hand...erm... hoof open?  That's kind of stupid Twilight."

She looked a little annoyed that I cut her off, but hey, I'm bleeding here.

"I was getting to that Hex.  The stone stores a sample of your blood.  If you are at a point where your magic doesn't work, you can just open it by pushing on the stone now.  It shouldn't be sharp now, since it got a sample.  Nopony would have been able to cut themselves easily on it.  All you need to do is push on the stone, or walk into your closet and will the safe open or closed.  I designed that part myself.  When you go down the stairs, lamps should turn on by themselves.  All magic."

Okay, I had to admit that is pretty badass.  I wasn't going to tell her that though.  I just got stabbed in the hand after all.

"Anything else I should know about the house Twilight?"

Just in case there were any other special traps around, it was a good thing to ask ahead.

"There are a few things..."

"Of course there are," I muttered to myself as she continued, oblivious to the fact I was talking to myself.

"We came up with something special for when you want to practice your magic.  If you look at the front door, to the left, there is a small gem set into the wall.  Do the same thing to that as you did to the safe."

I just stood there for a minute waiting for her to continue before I realized she was waiting for me to go and do it.  Just a few steps and I'd get stabbed in the hand again.  Yay.  As I reached toward the stone, cautiously this time since I knew it was going to hurt, I realized there was a small silver colored ring of metal surrounding it.  Interesting.  Nothing left to do, I touched the gem with my hand.

"SON OF A BITCH!"

That bastard really hurt.  Almost like someone hit my palm with a hammer.

"Tell me that was a one time deal Twilight."

"It is Hex.  We just needed to get it set to you the same was as your safe.  Look at the walls now."

Thin silver threads had appeared in the paint and crossed every surface, curving and swirling on every edge, all starting where that gem was imbedded in the wall.  I reached out to touch one, but stopped as I realized that the nearer my hand was to the glimmering lines, the brighter they glowed.  Some silver, some gold.

"What the hell is that?"

"That was what the Princesses, myself, and the best unicorns in Equestria could come up with.  You can practice your magic all you want in here, provided you turn the wards on first.  They isolate the house from the natural flow of magic, so you can't endanger anything by accident.  Any magic used when they are on must come from within the house.  It even protects the house from magic if something were to happen.  The same spell is used on the castle and now on my library and a few other...choice... places."

Oh, that was pretty badass.  If I understood her right, no magic in, no magic out so long as that gem had power.  That was a pretty kickass security system.  Not to mention, I had a few ideas of my own to work into it if I could get it working.

"Twilight, I have to admit something to you.  I never was happy to be sucked into this crazy world, but I'm starting to like it here.  You ponies went above and beyond on the house.  I really have no idea what to say beyond that it is completely awesome."

The purple unicorn only blushed a little bit at the complement as she continued.

"The two spells do have some limitations.  The Princesses or any of the Element bearers can turn them off or on if we need to.  Just a failsafe in case something happens to you or in the house.  Beyond that, the house has all the usual things.  Magic pretty much runs everything, the hot and cold water, heat, the ice box, you name it.  Oh, and the Princesses had a surprise for you in the basement.  Its through your safe door."

Nodding softly at the unicorn, a simple thank you didn't seem like enough of thanks, but it was all I could do as she turned toward the front door.  I almost reminded her about the gem in the wall, but just as I opened my mouth, a pinkish haze surrounded the stone and the wards turned off as she walked through the door.

Looking around the house was like seeing it again for the first time.  My new home was pretty badass.  Oh yeah, Surprise!  I bolted toward the bedroom and through the dark chasm in the wall.  Magical light exploded around me as the steps and basement burst into light.  Just a few steps down were the things I never thought I'd see again.

Hanging on pegs inset into the wall were my toys.  The lifeblood of a hunter and soldier, my firearms.  One by one, I lifted them out of their resting places and ran my hands over them.  I knew every curve by memory.  A frown slowly crossing my face as the feel of these in my hands after so long brought other memories forth like a runaway freight train.

It was all I could do to catch myself and gently place one of the pistols on the floor as I kneeled.  Months of repressed memories cascaded into my mind, including the curves of someone I would never see again.  Amongst the firearms and isolation of the basement, I broke down and wept.  Wept for who I was and what I turned into.  Wept for the ones I had lost and left behind.  I wept for my memories as they tore my soul into a thousand shattered pieces.

My broken mind thinking the screams carried on the wind were only bloody memories...