A Toaster in Equestria

    One day Rainbow Dash was flying around performing her morning routine of stunts... like every other day.  Rainbow Dash was preparing to do a new stunt she worked out, one that was to surely get her into the Wonderbolts.  First she had to perform an immelmann loop into a double barrel role.  Following the rolls she would fly up and perform a pretzel loop then dive straight at the ground as fast as she could.  At the last second she would pull up and fly parallel to the ground before spinning and skidding on the ground to stop.  During the whole stunt she would also be singing Helter Skelter by the Beatles, therefore she decided to call it Ringo Blast.

    The amount of concentration needed to pull up last second while singing was amazingly large and there was a large chance of injury, but Rainbow Dash was prepared to accept that risk.  She found an open field and performed the trick  right up to the final part flying several inches above the ground.  Nothing quite felt like grass tickling your belly while flying at several hundred miles an hour.

    Suddenly she saw something approaching in her path.  Rainbow Dash didn’t recognize the shape, and it didn’t matter, she couldn’t stop, try as she did.  She managed to turn around, but her momentum still shot her towards the object.  They collided and Rainbow Dash found herself tumbling for a few yards.  She opened the eyes she couldn’t remember closing and was amazing to find that all her limbs were still attached and moveable.  She walked over to the object she crashed into.

    Surprisingly enough, it was just a shiny metal box with a lever on one side and two slits on top.  Rainbow Dash didn’t know what this object could possibly be.  She decided Twilight Sparkle probably had some idea and went to gather her friends.

…

    Six ponies carefully walked to the shiny box lying in the middle of the field, undisturbed in the past half hour the ponies took to gather themselves.  The six cautiously approached the box.  Suddenly a popping sound was as the level went up the side of the machine.  Two pieces of what  appeared to be dark brown bread were sticking out of the holes on top.

    Pinkie Pie, not being one to be freaked out by a silly little machine went straight up to the machine and scrutinized it.  “There’s a note here!” she exclaimed.  Twilight Sparkle used her magical powers to pick up the note and read the four words scrawled on it.

“All Toasters Toast Toast”

    “That doesn’t make sense,” complained Rainbow Dash.  “What’s a toaster?  And what is toast?”

    “And what does the verb, ‘to toast’ mean, darling?” piped in Rarity, catching the use of the verb in the note.

    Twilight Sparkle thought for a moment, then figured out the meaning of the message.  “Girls, it’s simple.  This note came with this machine, right?”  She paused to wait for the other ponies to nod up and down.  They all did except Applejack.  Twilight Sparkle glared at her.  She caught the look then proceed to nod.  “That means that it’s safe to assume this machine is the toaster this note spoke of.”

    The other ponies realized that what Twilight said made perfect sense and nodded some more.  Rarity figured the next part out.  “So that means that the brown, bread-like substance is toast, right.”

    “Indeed,” agreed Twilight.

    “Well then, let’s examine the toast!” shouted Pinkie Pie before giggling up to the toaster and grabbing a piece of the assumed toast.  It was warm and hard.  “Hmm,” she said.  She took a bite.  “It appears that one finds a piece of this hard bread thing then put it in the toaster to heat it up.”

    Rainbow Dash had one pressing question left.  “Where does one acquire said piece of toast?”

    Nopony knew, so they figured the machine was useless and left the machine there, because their work was done.

    Except Rainbow Dash.  Several hours later she came back for the machine and took it home with her... and used it to heat herself up after cold days in the winter.  What did you think she would do with it, pervert?