I stood behind the bar, smiling at the table of chatty, slightly tipsy mares. I’d been on my hooves all evening, but it did me good to do some real work once in a while, and seeing all of my girls enjoying a night together wasn’t the worst way to spend a night. It was late, though, and yawns were popping up mid-conversation more and more often. Finally, Day Planner rose from her seat and stretched, and the other mares began to follow suit as if on cue.

“Thank you for this evening, Mr. Deal.” Day’s genuine, unsarcastic smile caught me off guard. “Apparently even I can enjoy a party, given proper company. And the opportunity to see you do some work around here.” Day’s smile was gone already. If I didn’t know her, I might not have realized she was teasing me.

One by one, mares sounded off with thanks and the occasional wisecrack until at last Exposé flapped up into the air. “Yeah, good party. Thanks. Gotta get to bed, though. Not everypony gets to stay up partying every night you know.” With her back already to me, and flying toward the door, Exposé waved a hoof. “Later.”

Pirouette rolled her eyes at the ungrateful pegasus as other mares nodded and offered more friendly farewells, but Bright Jade was having none of it. Before Exposé could reach the door, there she was in front of it, on guard. “Wait! Nopony can go yet! I didn’t get my photo for Mr. Deal!” Like a watchdog, Jade blocked the door, not realizing or not caring that Exposé could just fly over—which is precisely what she did.

Jumping as high as she could, Jade caught Exposé’s tail in her teeth, dragging her back down and making her squawk angrily. “Ow! Hey, I never agreed to it! Let go!” Exposé flapped harder and struggled to get loose, but Jade just put that much more work into pulling her away from the door.

“Ish ‘er ‘isher ‘eal! ‘Oo ‘av ‘oo!” Jade’s teeth stayed clamped, making sure Exposé went nowhere. Comical as the scene was, Exposé had already gotten into a fight with Peach Pit, and I wasn’t interested in another. I trotted out from behind the bar as mares crowded around Jade.

“Jade, let her go.” I was matter of fact and clear—knowing exactly what I wanted from her always made Jade smile.

“…’ut…” Exposé’s tail was still clamped in her teeth, and Jade laid her ears back unhappily, shrinking as if I’d yelled. Arguing twice in a night? Had not working for me been that hard on her?

“I didn’t say she could go, just to let go of her tail, Jade. You’ll get your photo.” Immediately Jade’s mouth popped open, and Exposé, still flapping hard, launched up and forward. If she hadn’t gotten her hooves in front of her, she’d have plowed head first into the wall. Spinning to face Jade, Exposé snatched up her tail and scowled.

“No way am I going to now! That hurt! See if you get any pic… ugh. You don’t get to cry! You bit my tail!” Exposé’s feistiness was wavering, to my surprise. I looked down, and sure enough, Jade’s ears were down, and she was blinking up at Exposé, looking even more unhappy than she had just a moment before.

I patted Jade’s withers and frowned up at the stubborn pegasus, but before I could say anything, Peach Pit was in the air next to us. “Look at her! Picking on me is bad enough, but she just wants a photo for Mr. Deal! What’s wrong with you?”

Pirouette was sitting on her haunches, front legs crossed. “Honestly! If you’d cooperate, it would be done by now!”

Guilt started to show on Exposé’s face. “Hey! C’mon, I just—” Exposé was cut off by Strawberry Frosting squeezing through ponies to give Jade a hug, and Exposé a glare.

“She just wants a picture! Why are you making this so hard?” Strawberry’s tone caught me off guard.

Exposé looked frantically around the room for an ally. “Wait, why’s everypony ganging up on me like this? Parapet, help!”

Bruises didn’t sound angry, just disappointed. “You’re not mean like this when we’re alone.”

Exposé’s jaw dropped. “I’m not being mean! She bit my tail!” Exposé’s own ears were down now.

My crystal pony lowered her head and sniffed.

Exposé looked miserable, and I doubt it was a matter of numbers. “…fine. I’ll be in the picture.”

Jade’s ears and head popped right up so suddenly I jumped. “Everypony on the stage, please, and line up so I can see everypony! Mr. Deal?”

I couldn’t help it. I was staring at Jade with my jaw hanging wide. “Jade, you were faking?”

Exposé forgot to flap, nearly hitting the floor before she caught herself. “What?”

Jade nodded. “Day Planner said it was a good way to get you to give me more to do. And Shimmer said it would help you one day, if I could get ponies to do something for you. And it worked!”

There was a sparkle in Shimmer’s eyes as she laughed, a hoof covering her mouth. I doubt she’d expected to be taken in by her own advice. Exposé’s hoof was covering her eyes in disbelief, embarrassment, or both. I covered mine at the notion of Shimmer teaching Jade to trick me.

Mares headed up toward the stage, snickering at Exposé’s misfortune. As Bruises passed, she simply caught her fillyfriend in the glow of her magic and trotted along cheerfully.

With everypony on stage at last, Jade set her tripod on a table and looked down her camera’s viewfinder. With her eye still on the camera, as if it were nothing at all, she called out, “Oh, everypony turn around and lift up your tails. And Peach Pit needs to take off her dress.”

Pirouette’s eyebrow shot up, but it wasn’t Jade she was giving the eye—clearly this was my fault. Primavera looked ready to faint. Peach Pit? Hours earlier, when everypony was a stranger, she’d only mentioned what I did to her mane. As soon as she was certain it was that kind of photo, though, her dress was off and fluttering to the floor as she spread her long wings and struck the most provocative pose she could, teats on full display. I had maybe a heartbeat to worry about getting a boner in front of everypony before I was on the run, Pirouette right on my tail.

“Done Deal, what did you do to that poor filly? Get back here!” Pirouette’s leap from the stage to the show floor was as graceful as her dancing, but I wasn’t about to stay and applaud. I wasn’t exactly sure what I should do, but I was absolutely certain that “getting back there” was nowhere near the top of the list. Peach Pit turned to yell that it was fine, that she was happy like that. She even tried to fly after Pirouette, to come save me, but had already been surrounded by seven of the other eight mares on stage as they crowded to see just what had made Pirouette chase me around the club. Primavera turned to look away, her face as red as I’ve ever seen any mare’s. Honestly, she looked adorable, and I’d have loved to go calm her down, if not for the mare on the rampage right behind me.

As I approached the stage on my third lap, I saw Day’s horn glow, and a moment later, heard Pirouette scream. Against my better judgment, I stopped and turned—to find the toilet spider clinging to Pirouette’s face. She struggled to get it off as Day held it in place magically and everypony watched, biting back their laughter. Peach looked a bit dismayed at losing her audience.

Amber cocked her head. “Steve is friendly.” The mares on stage cracked up, even Primavera.

Amber had no sooner straightened out her head than Shimmer cocked her own. “Steve? Why Steve?”

Amber shrugged. “Because he’s Steve.”

That Amber’s strangeness was becoming endearing was almost as scary as Pirouette. I looked back to Pirouette as Day finally quit rubbing the spider in her face, and was relieved not to have to start running again immediately. “Day Planner! What’s the big idea?” No longer chased, and with the ridiculous giant spider off of Pirouette’s face, I began to worry a bit about the evening’s mood.

Day was completely unflappable, as usual. “You played as hard as anypony else to win him for the night. If you want to play tag, that’s up to you, but Peach says she’s happy. It’s less likely to make trouble than Shimmer’s coat, or even your looks if somepony remembers you from the casino. So why are you so angry?”

Pirouette didn’t answer. Instead, she looked up at Peach on the stage. “You’re really happy with… those?”

In one of my worse ideas that night, I answered for her. “They’d be bigger if I’d done what she sai—hey!” Suddenly Steve was adorning my face.

“Nopony asked you.” Pirouette walked past me and clambered back onto the stage without going around. Face to face with Peach, she asked again. “Well?”

Through fake spider legs, I saw Peach’s expression—I think Pirouette had offended her. “Yes. And he didn’t make me want them, I’m sure of it! He likes them, and that’s enough for me. And… they’re fun to show off. Not that I can, usually…”

Pirouette tried one last time to argue. “But… the rings!”

Peach shook her head. “They were a surprise to him, too! He actually fell down when I pushed them against the window!” Ponies’ jaws dropped, and I wondered if maybe Peach hadn’t gotten just a little too comfortable with everypony.

Day, though, nodded as if the matter were settled. For the moment at least, it was. “There, Pirouette. You can get back to your reverse hard to get act when this photo is done and he’s yours for the night. Places, ponies.” Day yawned. “Not everypony gets to wander into the office whenever they want to.”

Blushing at Day’s ridiculous joke, Pirouette returned to her place on stage, and the rest of the mares shuffled their way over too. Bruises took a place next to Peach, stealing a nervous glance at her teats. “E-exposé would have trouble flying…”

In a heartbeat, Exposé was perched on Bruises’ withers, stomping on the big mare’s head, and not seeming to bother her at all. “I’d be just fine!”

I shook my head, smiling at the tiny mare’s thorns.

“Exposé, just stay on Parapet’s back, please! That’s perfect. Um… Primavera, you’re out of the frame. You need to come closer.” Things were finally back on track, with Jade working to compose the photo.

Primavera was clearly not on board. Honestly, I had no idea why Pirouette wasn’t putting up a bigger fight. Deep took a page from her sister’s book. “You said you wanted to be part of this, Primavera. Not that I mind. Just means Jade can zoom in and make me show up better for Done.” Alright, not quite a page out of Day’s book after all.

Trotting quickly to the rest of the mares on stage, Primavera took her place next to Strawberry, who’d been quietly blushing the whole time, and had yet to flip up her tail. Strawberry patted Primavera’s withers and cheerfully said, “You do like Mr. Deal!”

Primavera laid her ears back halfway and studied the stage. “It’s… complicated.”

Jade saved Primavera from further embarrassment. “Alright everypony! Tails up, look at the camera, and smile!”

I should’ve said something. I know I should have, and Celestia help me, I’ll go to Tartarus because I didn’t. But when Shimmer’s horn lit and Steve floated below eye level, coming to stop and point at Day Planner’s exposed gash with four legs, I just let the shutter go off.

* * * * *

As the last mare slipped out the door, leaving me alone with Pirouette, I had no idea what to expect. Honestly, the way Pirouette had taken to Peach, I half expected her to dump me in Peach’s lap with a warning to behave myself. Without instructions, I got to work cleaning up, but had only gotten two chafing dishes stacked on a cart when Pirouette cleared her throat. I turned and found her, front legs crossed, sitting on her haunches, tail swishing the floor. I consoled myself that it’d just be one night, and hoped Peach’s teats weren’t still ticking her off. I did, however, have the sense to keep my big yap shut for a change.

“Just what do you think you’re doing, Done? I’ll take care of this in the morning. I’m staying here after all.” An opportunity to make me work, and she was passing it up? She wasn’t yelling or crying, so she couldn’t have been too angry. I felt my ears turn opposite directions.

“I’m dead, aren’t I?” She enjoyed our sparring, and I was far too confused to try anything else.

Pirouette smiled mock-viciously and stood, pointing to the stairs. “You are if your hooves aren’t on those stairs in three seconds.”

I really didn’t get it, but if she was content to play around, I wasn’t about to spoil her… whatever kind of mood it was. I took off running, hooves clanking on the cast-iron as I rushed to the top, as if I were fleeing an orange and red dragon. The smirk on Pirouette’s face said I’d played that card right, at least. She started up the stairs behind me, pausing to turn out the house lights, and I rushed straight through the office and the door to my apartment. I considered locking Pirouette out and taunting her a bit through the door, but she was playing some game or another, and she really was more fun when she was feeling playful. Leaving the door unlocked, I waited to hear her enter the office, and noisily scrambled up my apartment’s stairs. I couldn’t be sure, but I thought I heard Pirouette chuckle at my antics.

With Pirouette climbing the stairs behind me again, I carefully lifted the sofa in my living room and crawled underneath, lowering it with difficulty onto my back. It was ridiculous of course. That wasn’t a case of a tail sticking out of a cardboard box; the whole couch angled up into the air over my plot. Calling it “hiding” was more than a stretch. Pirouette reached the top of the stairs and burst out laughing. “Done Deal, you get out from under that sofa this minute!” I finally felt myself actually relax. I still didn’t know what Pirouette had in mind, or why she let me out of cleaning up, but the warmth in her laughter was unmistakable. She was in the mood to be my best friend, not a mother hen.

“Nopony under here but us cobwebs!” I didn’t spend nearly enough time just having fun with Pirouette, and wasn’t ready to be serious. I had to seize every non-naggy minute I could get. And with Strawberry as my maid, it wasn’t even dusty down there.

“Oh. Well, I guess I’ll just have a seat then, until Done comes back.” I heard Pirouette’s hoofsteps approach and decided that it was time to come out after all. Quickly, I rolled out from under the sofa and let it fall next to me with a thump. It was too late, though. While I was still on my back, Pirouette dropped her rear right on my stomach and just sat humming while I struggled to breathe. Slender or not, Pirouette was no pegasus, and I felt that weight.

“Help! Help, air!” I thrashed a bit, but didn’t shove Pirouette off. She was still playing, after all.

“Oh, Done! There you are. Some cobweb said you weren’t here.” In no rush, Pirouette got up and I took a few deep breaths… before asking for trouble.

“I think that’s probably the first time I’ve ever gotten a feel of your plot, Pirou—oof!” A hoof landed right on my solar plexus, and Pirouette trotted away with her nose in the air. I rolled again, levering myself up with the coffee table as I coughed and caught my breath for the second time in fewer than thirty seconds.

“Okay, I earned that one.”

Pirouette walked back and whacked my withers while I rubbed my stomach. “Done Deal, if I gave you half of what you earned…” She trailed off with a sigh, and looked at the floor.

“You okay, Pirouette?” The mood had been light just a second ago. I didn’t think I’d done anything to blow it, but I rarely knew when I had anyway.

Pirouette turned to look at me. “Am I just a wet blanket, Done?”

And I thought I’d been confused before! “Pirouette, you just chased me up the stairs and teased me out from under a sofa. In what way is that being a wet blanket?”

Pirouette shook her head. “No, no, not…” With a hoof rubbing her eyes, for a moment Pirouette looked older than she had before I’d wrapped her in smoke. “I mean… you get on so well with all the new girls. I know you’ve used that smoke on them, but they’re all happy with you, and you’re happy with them. And then there’s stuffy old Pirouette, yelling at you to behave yourself. I’m a kill joy. Peach is happy. She said she even likes those… things you gave her. They make her ‘special.’ And there I was, yelling and chasing you. Done, if I’d caught you, I’d have given you such a slap!” Pirouette hung her head.

I was lost. Seriously lost. Right then, though, Pirouette wasn’t a mother hen, and she wasn’t my best friend. She was a really unhappy mare—the bane of my existence. I pushed her gently toward the sofa and sat down beside her, with a leg across her withers. “I don’t know where this came from all of a sudden, Pirouette, but you’re my best friend. You were before I lucked out with the smoke, and you are now. You can be a bit of… a fussbudget, I guess, but you’re just looking out for the girls.”

Pirouette leaned into my side, and I felt her warmth. The smoke swirled just a bit inside me, and I slammed it back down harder than I ever had before. “You remember years ago, Done, when you threw us a party? Not long after you hired me?”

I smiled. “You thought of it too, huh? Pizzas for everypony, the first night you were in charge of the show.” I looked down at Pirouette as she leaned her head against my neck. “It was the best show we’d ever had. Even the mare whose promotion you stole said she’d rather dance for you than try to put together something so good.”

Pirouette swallowed, and her ears lay back. “I’m not nearly drunk enough for this.” I frowned. I’d never once heard Pirouette say she wanted to be drunk before. “That’s why I nag, Done. I’m not trying trying to spoil your fun. I’m not trying to be a prude. I’m not trying to get between you and somepony else. I’m only trying to protect the girls, and… and the Done I knew.”

I felt like the sofa had been yanked out from under me. Pirouette could’ve slapped me, and I wouldn’t have been hit so hard. “What’s that supposed to mean, Pirouette?” I was stung, but Pirouette wasn’t panicking, wasn’t threatening to go to the princesses like she had when I first came back from the Crystal Empire. I didn’t want to take the quick fix this time.

Looking down, Pirouette replied, but I could tell she was forcing herself. “You were never a skirt-chaser, Done. A bit of a flirt sometimes, but you’d been with what, three mares in your life before we met?”

My left ear flicked. It’d only been two. I’d lied when we were becoming friends, to boost my ego. “Uh, something like that.”

“There were eleven mares down there tonight, Done. I’m the only one you haven’t…” Pirouette got up and walked to the shelf with the photos. Her ears dropped when she saw all of the photos that had nothing to do with The Tall Tail itself. I wasn’t sure it was the right move, but joined her. Like Peach Pit just days before, there was no running from it. I really needed to move that shelf into the den.

“Who was the Done you knew, Pirouette? Besides ‘not a skirt-chaser.’” If Pirouette needed me to be something—if I wasn’t treating my girls right, or if I was turning into Mosely Orange—I wanted to know.

“The Done I knew always took care…” Pirouette trailed off, and her eyebrows knitted. “He always had a smile for—I mean, we couldn’t come to work without you… without you…”

Pirouette looked up, red faced. “You’re right here, aren’t you? The Done I knew. It’s just that all these mares you roped in can see it, and… I—oh Celestia, Day Planner was right, wasn’t she?” Pirouette laughed, but it was a humorless laugh, almost bitter. “The real reason I want you to behave is because you don’t do any of this with me!” Pirouette gestured at the photos of debauched mares and me. I fell on my plot with a dull thump.

That earned me a warmer laugh at least. “Pulled the rug out from under you, didn’t I, Done?” Pirouette was trying not to cry, and I desperately hoped she wouldn’t. There was enough I couldn’t handle as it was. “Pulled it out from under me, too.” Pirouette plopped down beside me on the floor. “Done?”

I must’ve been gaping like a fish, but I managed to answer. “Yeah?” Sort of.

“Put me on the list.” Pirouette’s tone was pleading. “I don’t have to be on the top. But put me on the damn list, okay? I don’t want to be the only mare who doesn’t know you.”

I had no idea what I was saying. My mouth moved, and there were words. “You’ve always been on my list, Pirouette. I just had you on the wrong one.” I really had no idea what I was saying. What was that even supposed to mean?

Pirouette looked up at the photos again. “You’re not getting one of those of me.”

“Jade went home with Amber and Shimmer.” I shook my head and wobbled to my hooves. “There’s nopony to take one.”

Pirouette rose too, with a hoof from me. I was as eloquent as ever. “So what now?”

She looked at the wall, and took a second to collect herself. “Bed?”

I took a second myself. “Are you sure, Pirouette? This is really sudden.” I couldn’t believe I’d just questioned whether or not to take an attractive mare to bed, but Pirouette was… Pirouette.

Another nearly bitter, short laugh from Pirouette. “It’s not sudden at all. I’m just as thick as you are, that’s all. Bed. I’m sure.” Pirouette was starting to sound like herself again, which was reassuring. I considered a little teasing to break the tension, and ditched the idea. I didn’t think tension was what would end up getting broken.

“This way, Pirouette.” I gestured back along the wall to the hallway, and Pirouette laughed again, this time without bitterness.

“Really? I thought you’d moved your bed into the den.” Apparently teasing was back on the table after all.

“Alright, alright, you.” I headed down the hall, Pirouette in tow, more painfully aware of her presence than I’d have liked. I had been a long time since I’d been nervous about taking a mare to bed. Naturally, Pirouette noticed.

“I imagined you’d be more dashing, or nonchalant, really. Could it be that Done, the great ladies’ stallion, is scared?” Pirouette’s voice dripped with sarcasm, but it sounded strained. I smiled, just a bit. She was no better.

Climbing onto the bed and lying on my back, I tried my best to deadpan, but a bit of a smirk ended up on my muzzle in spite of myself. “Well, you’ve gotta admit, Pirouette. You are a scary one.”

Pirouette’s jaw dropped—whether she was insulted or just stunned that I could still talk back, I wasn’t sure, but before I had time to worry about it, she was on top of me, front hooves on my chest. “I’ll show you scary, Done Deal!”

And the nervousness was gone. We were in bed, but she was Pirouette, and I was the ever present thorn in her flank. “Oh no! What wimph?!” Pirouette had grabbed Jade’s pillow and was smothering me with it while I thrashed underneath her as if I were about to die. With Pirouette gloating above me, I reached up and broke a cardinal rule: never tickle Pirouette. Her triumphant taunts melted into gales of laughter in a heartbeat, as she helplessly dropped down over my body, sliding her thighs open over mine without meaning to. Thanks to Pirouette squirming on top of me as she giggled, I’d begun to rise, and her new position left my stirring shaft brushing against her soft lips. I was startled, and the tickling died instantly. Although Pirouette couldn’t help a few more giggles as she caught her breath, she turned serious quickly too.

For a heartbeat.

“I thought you said I was scary.” Her smirk as she lowered herself, warming my cock, was frustrating. I reached up to pull her down, meaning to kiss the grin right off her muzzle, but she quickly held my front legs down, and for the first time since we reached the bedroom, her voice was serious. “No. You get your way with everypony up here, I’m sure of it. I won you tonight, Done Deal. My rules.”

My dick had grown hard under Pirouette’s mound, and I could feel moisture starting to run down onto it. Pirouette was all talk. I let her keep me held down, but I mouthed off again. “So business as usual, huh?”

Pirouette grabbed the pillow and buried my face with it again. With my legs free again I seized the moment, copping a feel of Pirouette’s plot with both legs. Not what I wanted to do just then, but there was defiance that would earn a slap on the wrist, and defiance that would ruin the mood. As badly as I wanted to slide into the beautiful, stubborn mare straddling me, I had no interest in spoiling the fun. Pirouette squealed in half-serious indignation and thumped on the pillow my head was under, leaving me laughing as I gave her plot a squeeze.

“Hmph! So that’s how you’re playing this, Done? Fine.” Pirouette ignored my legs on her rear and lay her head on the pillow covering my face. Before I could worry that she was actually angry, Pirouette rocked her hips slowly, sliding her hot flesh along the length of my shaft, spreading her juices, the occasional dry spot catching and getting a gentle tug before falling away. I shivered a bit under Pirouette, anticipating more pleasure as her opening reached my flare, and tensed for it when her soft, soaking folds spread around it—but that was as far as it went. With my tip wrapped by her softness, but kept from sliding in, Pirouette crossed her front legs on the pillow burying my face and lay her chin down on it. Her voice dripped with smugness. “Sure you don’t want to play it my way, Done?”

I was sure I didn’t. Absolutely certain. Right that second, I wanted nothing more than to roll over and slide balls deep into Pirouette while I kneaded her firm, dancer’s flanks. I sighed into the pillow. That wasn’t quite true. Even more than that, I wanted my best friend happy—but it was a really close call. I let my hooves fall back to my sides, and in an instant, Pirouette had them pinned down again. So much for Ms. Nonchalant. I shook my head to knock the pillow aside and saw Pirouette smiling down at me triumphantly, lit by moonlight through the window. I couldn’t help smiling back. She really was a beautiful mare.

“Now that you’ve behaved, Done Deal…” Pirouette lifted her hips, her pleasant heat vanishing from my shaft. While one hoof still held down my leg, the other stroked my shaft’s full length, balls to tip, lifting it to her sex. I trembled again, and this time Pirouette lowered herself just far enough to take in my medial ring, her walls far tighter than I’d expected as they gave way to penetration. “I’m going to move my other hoof now, and you’re going to keep behaving. Aren’t you?” Without waiting for my answer, Pirouette slowly sank down onto my stallionhood, her hot insides leaving the inches not yet inside her feeling ice-cold in comparison. I couldn’t help but shiver and whine embarrassingly. As she sank, she raised her hooves to the back of her head, tugging at the ribbon that held her bun in place. I virtually never saw Pirouette with her long mane down, and as the crimson hair fell around her withers, a reason for that came to mind.

“You keep that up to avoid having every stallion in Manehattan fall for you, don’t you, Pirouette?” It was ridiculous, but right then it had felt honest.

Pirouette’s answer was a laugh, but the color in her cheeks deepened a bit. “No wonder you’ve been getting so much tail lately, you big flatterer.” My last inch slid into Pirouette’s hot, soft tunnel, and the two of us sighed in unison—and bit back the laughter. “Well it’s not going to work. Bad news, tonight you get what you’re given. The good news,” Pirouette looked out the window awkwardly. “Apparently I want to give you a lot more than I thought.” With no more warning, Pirouette’s tunnel clamped down on my rod and she pushed down, hard, grinding my flare against her insides while she squeezed tighter than anypony but Bruises ever had. I gasped, startled at the rough start and sat up a bit to wrap my front legs around Pirouette—only to be shoved back down by a hoof on my nose.

Pirouette shook her head. “I promise you’ll have fun too Done, but you’re my reward. Now be good, or I’ll listen to you whimper and moan through a pillow while I have my fun.” She was still smiling, but she really was serious. I sank back into my pillow reluctantly, and Pirouette began to rock her hips slowly and leaned down, muzzle to muzzle. Her lips brushed mine so lightly that I wasn’t even sure it’d happened. Another brush, and her hips quit moving. Pirouette sat back up, frowning. “Why is a kiss harder than putting you in?” Poor Pirouette had done things backwards, and passed the point of no return without easing herself in. I opened my mouth with a smartass answer, but the frustration on her face silenced me instantly.

“Let me break the ice on that, Pirouette. You can take charge again right away. Promise.” I couldn’t let Pirouette suffer. Besides, when she’d quit moving, she’d left me hanging something awful. Frustration turned wistful in Pirouette’s expression, but she leaned back down, lips the barest distance from mine, her fiery mane cascading all around my face.

“My one chance to put you in your place, and I blew it. If you mess with me right now, D—ah…mm.” Pirouette’s threatening whisper died on her lips as mine touched them, caressing and pressing softly. I had my limits. Pirouette relaxed after a moment, cautiously warming up to the kiss. I wanted to stroke her cheek, or brush her mane. I wanted to squeeze her plot, or a teat. But as Pirouette’s hips began moving again, slow as our kiss, I held myself back. The line had been crossed; the time for teasing had been left behind. The time for words, too, apparently. Pirouette didn’t draw back. In fact, she pushed her hips hight against me, otherwise relaxed, paying far more attention to our lips than anything else. Her hooves came up on either side of my face, and it started to sink in for me that my best friend was cradling my head as our tongues danced. I missed a beat.

Pirouette’s lips pulled away by only millimeters and she whispered, “Oh no you don’t. You got me through it; I’ll get you through it. Dragged by an ear if I have to.” Pirouette’s lips pressed back against a smile. Somehow, seeing her acing like herself made it easier, not harder, and I relaxed. Rewarded by Pirouette tightening around my rod again, I moaned softly into her mouth. It egged her on and she ground against my crotch, still gripping me tightly.

I broke the kiss. “Is this allowed?” Without waiting for her to ask what, I kissed my way from her lips to her throat, and Pirouette angled her whole front half, opening up the rest of her neck and driving herself onto my cock to the base. I continued the length of her neck, small wet kisses cooling spots on the neck that had been so warm on my lips.

As I worked my way back up, Pirouette panted her answer. “Th-that’s allowed.” Dropping her butt to let me kiss had bottomed me out inside of her. With Pirouette running the show, I had managed fine, but with my flare pressing against her deepest point, Pirouette’s voice was starting to sound sweet. It wasn’t a sound I’d ever expected to hear, but I couldn’t help smiling as Pirouette began to buck in earnest, teasing the base of my shaft with her tight hole while the flare dug into her flesh, leaving us both trembling. I brushed aside the brilliant red strands of Pirouette’s mane to lick back down her neck with the tip of my tongue. Pirouette gasped, lifted herself a few inches, and slammed back down on my stallionhood, whimpering and shaking as she hit. I’d found a weakness, and I pressed the advantage. Pirouette pinned my hooves down again, as if I were using them, and bucked roughly, sliding her wetness faster and harder as I breathed in the scent of her mane and took to nibbling a spot where my tongue had earned a near scream. Pirouette did scream then, shoved my head back into my pillow, and dove down. Her tongue pushed into my mouth as she came, riding me hard despite her tunnel convulsing around my cock. Trapped underneath the crazed mare, I returned the kiss with all the passion she offered me, but could only enjoy the ride otherwise. It didn’t take long before the wet heat slipping around and tugging at my shaft was too much. As Pirouette clamped down on both my muzzle and loins, I sprayed inside of her, my own sticky, hot mess joining hers.

For a while, Pirouette simply clung to me, shaking like a leaf while I regained my breath and enjoyed the afterglow. When she spoke, the afterglow rushed away instantly, like a flock of startled birds. “I ruined it, didn’t I, Done?”

I could only blink. A few things came to mind, but none made any sense. The sex was a little vanilla, but not bad. Letting her have her way hadn’t spoiled anything. When I didn’t answer, Pirouette’s ears drooped. “Now I’m just another girl to you.”

I stared, dumbfounded for just a second longer at the lovely red-maned beauty on top of me—and then I cracked up. I couldn’t help myself. It was the stupidest thing I’d ever heard! As Pirouette glared angrily, I pulled my front legs free and wrapped them around her, honestly a bit concerned she’d jump off and storm out of the room. “You will never, never be ‘just’ anything, Pirouette. You’re my best friend, our star dancer, the only pony I let boss me around, and now a lover, too. The only thing that’s changed is that now when I piss you off, you can refuse to put out.”

Pirouette’s jaw dropped at my crass joke, and the next thing I knew my spare pillow was over my face again, with Pirouette pummeling it more viciously than before. “Done Deal, you are a terrible pony to fall in love with. I’m never going to forgive you.” Pirouette stopped pounding on my padded head and rested hers on the pillow with a sigh. “Or quit feeling like this, I bet.”

I moved one leg to pull the pillow out from under Pirouette’s head, and she moved to rest on my chest, head turned to look at at the moon that had lit her so beautifully. “With you every step of the way. That’s what you said the night you made me look young again, Done. Remember?”

I smiled and stroked her mane. The red really was gorgeous out of its bun. “Of course I do. Who else is going to keep me going?”

Pirouette looked up and kissed my chin. “I finally took the steps you’ve been taking without me. Quit walking so fast. I’m old.”

My smile turned impish. I couldn’t resist. With my hoof still gently stroking Pirouette’s mane, I murmured, “You sure are.”

I had expected the pillow again. The same glint was in Pirouette’s eyes, but that’s not what came. Instead, a sad sigh. “Yeah. You may have to finish raising our little colt or filly without me.”

Bolt upright in an instant, heart pounding, I yelled, “What?”

Tossed off of me gracelessly by the catapult I’d become, Pirouette cackled, holding her sides as she laughed. “Done Deal, you idiot!” I stared at her in horror, not understanding how she could laugh at a time like this. It was one thing with the other girls—but a family with Pirouette? What had I been thinking? I stared at my seed pouring from between her legs as if it were my death sentence, and Pirouette just rolled, laughing with tears pouring from her eyes. “Day’s doctor is a fertility specialist! She’s why Day’s never gotten big despite—oh Celestia your face Done; I’m going to die!” It sank in slowly, through the stomach turning horror. Pirouette wouldn’t be birthing my foal.

I grabbed a sheet and yanked it over my body in mock anger as Pirouette struggled to cuddle up while still laughing her fool head off.

“You earned that, Done Deal. And if you think—oh, my sides—that you’re done paying for your rottenness tonight, you’ve got another thing coming.” Pirouette nuzzled my neck gently and kissed my hurt ego better. “But not tonight. Tonight, I’m as big a fool as you are, and in love to boot.” She squeezed me and sighed. “No. No, I think I’m probably a much bigger fool.”

I rolled and wrapped her in my front legs, despite still being a tad sore at her prank. “You’d have to be. Any mare with any sense would run screaming the moment she saw me. A very wise pony once said so. Can’t remember who, though…”

Pirouette smacked me for my trouble, and pushed one of my hooves to her plot. Our relationship wasn’t going to get any simpler. But we’d manage.

Author's Note

"Dee Geeeeeee, where's all the miiiiiiind controooooool? Where's the smooooooooke?"

Yeah, yeah, I know. There's a chapter with VERY heavy smoke on the way, though, and I've slated the next two of the OCs I agreed to include a YEAR ago for the short term. So with any luck, this'll get rolling again. You know, until mid December when I curl up like a ball because reasons.