Beavis and Butthead in Ponyville

Beavis and Butthead in Ponyville (chapter one)
by TheTinCanPlan

“It's a letter from the Princess!”, exclaimed Spike. “Oh great, let's hear it!”, replied Twilight.

“Dear my faithful student Twilight,

lately my royal serfs and messengers have been having a difficult time traveling all over Equestria delivering messages and running diplomatic errands, especially because of the recent uprising of the Crystal Empire. The need of a way to transport ponies faster has urgently become apparent to me. I am asking you Twilight, to create some kind of a teleportation machine that can be easily re-created and mass produced to go in every major city and place of royalty. Take as much time as you see fit.

Sincerely, Princess Celestia

“Wow Twilight! This sounds like an important task. I'm sure you'll find a way to-”
“I'm already on it Spike”, interrupted Twilight as she pulled the book of the shelf with her purple glow of magic. “Ah right here. 'How to Create a Magic Teleporter in Three Easy Steps'”
“You know I could have found that for you”, said Spike, feeling slightly left out.

“Step one...”, announced Twilight. “Find a pony with ample knowledge of magic. Well I certainly know a pony with ample knowledge of magic”, giggled Twilight as she said this to herself in the mirror. Step two... find a rainbow archway.”

“Where are you gonna find one of those?”, asked Spike.
“Easy.”, stated Twilight as she walked outside, looking up at the clouds trying to find RainbowDash. “RainbowDa-ash!”, yelled Twilight cheerfully.
“Oh hey Twilight. Hey Spike. Whats up?”, asked RainbowDash as she hovered down from the cloud she was resting on.
“Princess Celestia charged me with the task of making a teleporter for royal duties. I need your help to make it though.”
“A teleporter?”, inquired RainbowDash, “Can't Celestia just use her magic to teleport?”

“Well yes.”, said Twilight, “but that wouldn't be ethical. You see RainbowDash, this isn't just for Celestia. One of these will be in every city for many ponies to use, so it is a very important task.”

“Ah, okay. So what did you need?”, asked RainbowDash.
“According to this book, I need the seven colors of rainbow spectra. Do you think you could go by Cloudsdale in the weather factory and get me some? I only need about a jar full.”

“Yea sure. No problem. I'll be back in a dash.”
Before Twilight could say anything, there went Rainbow Dash, off to get the spectra.
A few minutes later, Rainbow Dash came speeding back, skidding on the dirt road, kicking up dust, and made a perfect landing.

“Thanks RB. This means a lot.”
Rainbow Dash handed her the jar of rainbow spectra. The seven colors of the rainbow don't blend, so in the jar, each color was uniformly and neatly stacked on top of one another, much like how water will not mix with cooking oil.

“Yea, don't mention it. No problem. I gotta go guys. See ya.”
“Bye”, said Twilight and Spike in unison.

“Okay. Now for step three... create the rainbow archway on a wall, ensuring that the beginning and end of the rainbow are touching the ground. Easy enough,” said Twilight.

She dipped her hoof into the jar and did as the book instructed. She spread the spectra on the inside wall of her tree house. The two of them stood there waiting for something to happen. Spike tried putting his hand through the arch to see if it would disappear.
“Well that was a total dud said”, said Spike.
“I just don't understand why it wouldn't work! We did everything the book said!”

An angry and confused Twilight went into the kitchen to get something to drink. Spike picked up the book and looked at the publishing page.
“Well no wonder it didn't work. This book was printed in Viet-neigham!”, pointed out Spike.
“Ahh! That didn't work at all. What a waste of time. I'm going to bed Spike.”
“Uh, okay then. See you in the morning.”

Twilight went to bed and soon Spike did too.