Yoglabs: Dimensional Portal

Simon and pinkie were preparing more Jaffa Cakes. Simon had covered the pan in wheat, the put some orange stuff in dots all over the wheat, then put solid chocolate over the top. The Pinkie torched it with her flamethrower. Within seconds, the building was on fire.

Pinkie didn't seem to care as she continued burning the Jaffas, but Simon was on quenching duty, filling buckets and dousing the fires of Sugar Cube Corner. It was a tough process, but necessary for Jaffa Cakes. After about half an hour, the wall was charred, and the Jaffas were done.

Simon and Pinkie pigged out on the delicious cakes. "That was a good idea, Pinkie." Simon complimented.

"Thanks, Simey!" Pinkie replied.

"Hey, can I borrow that Flamethrower?"

"I don't see why not!" Pinkie said, "But you'll need a way to carry it. Here," Pinkie pulled out a tiny chest, about the size of a computer mouse, "This is a Pocket Universe. It'll fit whatever you put into it Look!" Pinkie opened the Pocket Universe, and dropped the flamethrower on top of it. It was compressed, and absorbed. "It's what I use to store whatever stuff I need. I also have stashes of different things all over Equestria, for various emergencies."

"Thanks, Pinkie." Simon took the Pocket Universe, "Do you have anything else helpful?"

"Well," Pinkie said, "This is my 4th Wall Hammer," she said, pulling a giant sledgehammer out of one of her own Pocket Universes, "I use this to break the 4th wall. You can use it if you want. I don't have any immediate need to use it in the foreseeable future."

"Thanks, I guess." Simon said. He took the hammer, and asked, "How do I use it?"

Pinkie explained, "Well, you have to look straight at one specific direction. Then, swing the hammer downwards, and you'll break the bindings of the fourth wall, seeing everyone who's reading this chapter."

"Chapter?" Simon asked.

"Just use it." Pinkie said.

Simon stared at a wall, then swung the hammer down. This is what he saw:

"Oh, Shit." Simon said, "What is this?"

"Simon," Pinkie said, "I'm gonna blow your mind. We're in chapter 9 of Prisoner 24601's My Little Pony Fanfiction called YogLabs: Dimensional portal."

"So, some dude's writing what we're saying right now?"

"Yep!"

Simon's mind was blown. "Well," He said, "All that aside, what else do you have."

"Well," Pinkie said, "There is one thing."

"What's that?" Simon asked, putting the 4th wall hammer into his Pocket Universe.

Pinkie gave him a rolled up map, and said, "This is my map of many wonders. It lets me teleport anywhere I deem fit. It also tells me where my friends are at all times. It's useful, but I don't think you'll need it... yet."

"Come on, we're friends, you can trust me." Simon begged.

"Sorry, Simey. We're friends, but this is very important to me. My Granny Pie bought it from a travelling salespony when she was young. She gave it to me for my birthday, before I moved to Ponyville."

"Okay, Pinkie." Simon said, "I understand. Anything else?"

"Nope!" Pinkie happily replied, "That's it!"

"Well, then, I think this is going to be helpful to me." Simon said.

Suddenly, the Cutie Mark Crusaders burst through the door, Apple Bloom said, "Simon, Simon!"

"Yes, Apple Bloom?"

"We need your help with our Cutie Marks."

"What Marks?"

"Cutie Marks," Said Scootaloo, "They are on the flank of everypony. It's their special talent. We haven't found ours yet."

"Oh. I thought those were all tattoos." Simon said.

"Nope!" Sweetie Belle said, "Everypony keeps telling us 'these things come with time', but we're sure we can get them sooner if we try."

"Well, of course!" Simon said, "Patience is for sissies! What are you planning on doing?"

"Well, uhhh." Apple Bloom said, "We're gonna be the-"

They all simultaneously said, "CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS DATING SHOW HOSTS!"

"Well, ummm." Simon said, "What do you need me for?"

"You're our Mystery Date man!" Apple Bloom said, "Ponies will come from all around to get a date with a mystery pony..."

"...Or Human." Scootaloo said.

"well, Uh," Simon said, "Who would be taking part in this Dating Show?"

"Everypony!" Sweetie Belle asked, "From geniuses like Twilight Sparkle to simpletons like Derpy Hooves!"

"Sounds good to me, "Said Simon, "Shall we get started?"

********

Lewis and Sjin were now slowly trudging towards Ponyville. They arrived at dusk, and got inside the gates. Lewis told Sjin, "We need to find some sort of Broadcasting device, and get in contact with Doctor Sriviramen."

"Really?" Sjin asked, "Isn't he the bad guy? He threw me and Sips here in the first place."

"He can supply us with weapons for Operation Matrix." Lewis Explained, "I lost my Desert Eagle in the prison."

"Fine. Any ideas?" Sjin asked.

"Well," Lewis said, "Sips' spacesuit has a comm device built into it. I know because I built it. If we can get it from him, we can contact the doctor, and get weapons."

"I can find Sips. I know where he'll go."

"You lead the way."

The next morning, Sjin and Lewis went to the local Toaster Store in Ponyville. "Are you sure he'll be here?" Lewis asked.

"Positive." Sjin replied.

They entered the Toaster Shack, and found Sips arguing with the clerk behind the counter.

"Listen, sir," the Clerk said, "We just need to know why you need the toaster."

"That's my own Damn business!" Sips yelled at him, "I just need a toaster. I've been looking for one for days, now! I just want a fucking toaster!"

Lewis came behind him, turned him around and forced him onto the counter. "Sips!" He said.

The Clerk ran off, scared, and Sips said, "Lewis? What are you doing here?"

"We need your Comm device!" Lewis demanded.

"well, there's no way you're getting it from me."

"Really?" Lewis said, "No way?"

"No way." Sips said.

Lewis hit the side of Sips' head with his fist, sending him down the counter. "No way?"

Sips got up, and got into a fistfight with Lewis. Haymakers, Uppercuts, and Hooks were flying everywhere. But eventually, Lewis delivered a knockout punch to Sips, and he sprawled across the floor.

The Clerk got back, and said, "Hey! There's no fighting in here! That's what the watering hole is for!"

Lewis gestured to the clerk, and he ran off in panic. He then leaned down, and pressed a button on Sip's sleeve. There was a crackle, and he said, "Sriviramen, do you come in?"

"Xephos?" Sriviramen said, "Is that you?"

"Yes, doctor. I've escaped Prison, and we need weapons. Send some down."

"Alright Xephos. Anything for Operation Matrix."

"Good." Lewis said. Dropping Sips' arm and taking Sjin back outside.