...You Get Ideas And An Admirer?

“I think...I’m gonna go now.” I looked at Sunset Shimmer from my leaned-up position against the rover. I’m pretty irritated that Siri didn’t answer me, and also for remembering my horrid past. My anger was simmering down but it was still there.

Sunset Shimmer got off her scared-ass and turned so that she was facing the west; presumably where Lumber Tree Farms was located. She then proceeded to trot slowly out of the clearing, reminding me of zombies with how slow she was moving. That, and her completely frozen face.

Serves her right for pissing me off.

Speaking of things that pissed me off, I pulled my katana from its sheath on my back and glared at it harshly. If it had a face, I’m pretty sure it would be matching Sunset Shimmer’s. I wasted not a second as I began scanning it once more, looking for any type of mechanism that would cause it not to cut through anything.

First, I looked at the diamond blade, running a hand along what was SUPPOSED to be the sharp side. I was feeling for a switch, button, lever....anything. When I got nothing from touching the blade, I immediately raised the sword with the hand that was holding it so that I could access the fuller. Using my free hand's index finger, I began probing said part of my sword.

The groove felt like ice, not that it was cold per se, but because of the smoothness. My finger seemed to slip and slide of its own will as it scanned the fuller, but to my only growing irritation, nothing was found.

Feeling my frustration reach dangerous levels, I resorted back to one of the deep breathing exercises my psychiatrist/anger management instructor taught me.

“Spring Day,” I inhaled, “Cold Winter.” I exhaled into an imaginary pair of hands. I kept repeating this exercise and eventually my anger started to subside. Now that I was thinking clearly, I decided to have another whirl at inspecting my sword.

I placed it on the ground with the pommel facing me as I sat down. It was awkward doing so, given my new legs that acted like rubber bands as I bent down. The sensation was like doing a split, but with none of the pain. All in all, I had successfully pulled off my criss-cross-applesauce position.

Reaching out to grab the pommel, I stopped mid-reach when something caught my eye. The amethyst being stationed as the pommel had a tan glow to the inside of it. An idea formed instantly.

“Amethyst isn’t good for a pommel. It’s brittle and can easily be broken with enough force. Then...why would Silas have it on a katana? Especially since you rarely hit someone with the pommel of a katana. It doesn’t make sense.”  So in knowing this, I promptly tried pulling the amethyst off the end of the katana.

I was indirectly worried about breaking the sword, but my jaw dropped when something unexpected fell out from where the amethyst once was. It was a piece of parchment, a faded tan color, that was wrinkled and worn. I picked it up and unwrinkled it, only to gaze upon a blank side of paper.

I turned it around.

There we go.

I smiled as I noticed a phrase that sounded familiar to me. It also had an old ring to it, like if it was from an ancient language back on my planet. I tried sounding it out.

“Ex...Acu...Ere. Gladi...Gladium. Meum?” I tried and looked to the sword expectantly. Nothing happened. I frowned and tried saying it faster, feeling the words roll off my serpentine tongue,  “Exacuere gladium meum.”

*SHING!*

The strangest thing happened right there. The sound could be likened to a thousand whistles blowing softly or a swing of a sharp sword. ? Yeah, I just heard a noise that came from nowhere. I'm calling it now, the planet is fucking with me.

Thinking nothing changed for my sword, since that noise was just loud as fuck and annoying, I leaned forward and picked it up by the blade. I gave a hiss of pain as the sword slashed into my fingers, drawing some blue blood out of me.

“Fucking sword.” I thought bitterly as I placed it back in its sheath. I investigated my newly acquired sword wound instantly, practically staring at the blue sanguine essence as it dripped from my fingers and onto the ground.

I was pretty lucky! Normally, you lose limbs over sword wounds. Especially from wounds caused by a diamond sword! I just chalked it up to the fact that I’m a descendant of dragons, and therefore, have their scale’s reliability. But then again this is a diamond sword we’re talking about here!

Wait a tick....

*Processing*

*Processing*

*Processing*

*Ding!*

“How the fuck...” My eyes widened as I brought my sword back out again. You know, the one that couldn’t cut anything!? Aside from the stinging sensation of my hand, which you can liken to enduring a paper cut, I was completely blown away by what just transpired, “...Did this sonuva bitch cut me?”

I studied it again, twirling it this way and that. It looked exactly the same. I was looking for my blood and couldn’t find it anywhere on the damn weapon. Just what the fuck is going on here?

I then did dumbest thing ever and prodded my arm with the point. I gave a bitch-y wince, a little meep escaping my mouth as I expected some serious pain from running myself through with a katana. Didn’t happen. The sword bounced right off of my arm as if it was made from gelatin.

“How the fuck...” I repeated, staying at the same level of confusion. This wasn’t making any sense. I was just cut like a scaley-pineapple from this thing, and now it’s harmless again? That’s...that’s not possible, “...Was it those words?” I asked myself quietly as I drifted my attention back towards the sheet of parchment. I had forgotten those words so quickly.

I winced as the pain in my hand picked up. I looked at it and noticed something that stopped my heart for a few moments.

My hand was closing. It was slow, but it was definitely CLOSING.

Holy fucking shit.

“Instantaneous regeneration? What, am I a Hollow?” I asked myself in a whisper as I brought my healing hand up to my ear. In case any of you were wondering, my ears were triangles that sat on the sides of my head like an anthro wolf.

I could make out the faintest traces of a zipper zipping up. Immortality doesn’t exist, so I guess that would make me insanely hard to kill. It took about a minute for those cuts on my fingers to heal, and as you can imagine, cuts on fingers aren’t all that deep or big.

The more you fucking know, right?

I could probably survive any engagement, as long as I was given time to heal afterwards. Which means I gotta train myself in order to remain just as hard to kill on the battlefield. Not that I would willingly thrust myself into dangerous situations. I am acting on behalf of the human race after all.

Even though I’m...this.

Getting back on track. I picked up my sword and the piece of paper. The sword in right hand, and the paper in my healed left hand. I then stood up, almost falling back on my ass due to the fact that both of my hands were occupied. But I managed to pull it off without any problems.

“So if my theory is true...” I dropped the paper after mentally installing the phrase in my head, “...Exacuere Gladium Meum!” I yelled in the foreign language, hoping for a response from my swo-

*SHING!*

“Yes! Now to see if it cuts anything.” I instantly looked at the piece of paper in my fully healed hand, gave an evil smirk, then tossed it in the air with the intent to cleave it.

The paper drifted down quicker than I had anticipated, but I swung my katana and managed to get it across the middle just as it drifted in front of my face. My sword carved through it like butter, the phrase on the parchment drifting down as two pieces of paper instead of one.

“YES!!! Now to see if the other part is true!” I had another theory about why my sword couldn’t cut me after I took it out again.

So, I sheathed my katana while moving my mane so it wouldn’t get an unwanted haircut, and waited for a little bit. After waiting for what felt like three minutes, I redrew my katana and tried stabbing it into the ground. It didn’t go through.

“So I was right! The sheath terminates the activation of the sword, making it virtually harmless again. Useful for when you want to make a quick get away and not cut yourself. Other than that, I still need to solve the mystery of my ‘pistols’.” I sheathed my sword without a second thought and took a look into the sky. I had no watch so I couldn’t tell time. It’s a good thing I looked up how to read the sun for an approximate guess while on Earth though.

The golden orb seemed to radiate a sense of warmth as it licked the trees in front of me. That definitely meant that it was sundown, getting ready to be night. So....7:30-ish? Seems about right. I’m no wildlife expert. I have to make sure to invest in a watch.

And speaking of investing, what am I gonna do for money? I don’t have an inkling on how to do other shit. Well, besides making smart-ass comments and getting angry. In school, they never taught you how to survive in case you were, let’s say, thrusted from your world into an alien’s body above a planet in a galaxy you had no fucking clue even existed.

But I’m sure the Pythagorean Theorem will get me out of this mess....

Useless-ass school system.

It’s a good thing I played a shit-ton of video games and watched a lot of anime, because those at least prepared me for the thorough randomness I’ve been experiencing all fucking da-

“Wait....Exacuere Gladium Meum? That sounds like something a certain wizard from Negima!? would say! Does that mean....I just used magic,” I asked myself as I raised a claw to stroke my manly chin hair, “Then does that mean I used magic in order to unlock my sword’s power? And if that’s the case, then do my pistols respond to magic? I have to conduct another test, but this time with my pistols.” I wasted no time in drawing said weapons and holding them in front of my face.

“I know that in the show, the wizards used latin as their magical language. I know a little bit, so why not try out some cool sounding names and see what happens. I did graduate at the top of my class under Latin.” I know I was feeling my ego, but I couldn’t even begin to describe how glad I was that my knowledge of the Latin language would actually be of some use here, in this foreign world.

So raising the pistol in my left hand, I thought of a cool phrase and got ready to press the trigger.

“Lanceae Fulgur!” I yelled into the heavens, which translates to ‘Lightning Lance’. A feeling of nausea overwhelmed me, making me lose balance and fall back onto my ass while simultaneously hitting my head on the black colored metal of my rover. I cursed as I felt my stomach churn.

I waited, feeling sick all the while, for about five minutes before the nausea started receding. I knew I could use magic, because according to Negima!?, you’ll get nauseous if you try overexerting yourself when it comes to magic. That, and I also felt a tingle run down my extended arm as I said those words.

I was so close! What was I missing?

I decided to stay like this, leaning against my rover for however long it took Siri to acknowledge my presence. For some odd reason, I feel as if Siri didn’t answer me before because she couldn’t, and not because she didn’t want to. I don’t know why I felt like that. I just....did.

Well today hasn’t been a waste of time. Not by a long shot if I might add. I met a total of three people today.

Lumber.

Jack(Jack-Jack?).

And Sunset Shimmer.

Being a brony, I knew all about Sunset Shimmer. That she used to be Princess Celestia’s Personal Student instead of Twilight. I saw the Equestria Girls trailer, and to be honest, she acts and sounds nothing like the real thing. For starters, she has a voice like Twilight's, but it’s slightly higher in pitch to make her sound younger than what she probably is.

That, and she tried so hard at applying make-up over her crow’s feet. That’s actually what made it noticeable. She had to be in her late thirties, early forties, give or take. So, she’s probably sensitive about her age.

But I also knew that she was holding back earlier, when we clashed for the first time. I could tell she was staging those grunts. For one, if you were actually straining yourself, there would be some trace of perspiration on your body. There wasn’t a bead of sweat on her forehead, where most of the perspiration should’ve appeared.

I don’t know how pony bodies work, but they seemed to share many human qualities. I’m willing to bet sweating from exertion is one of them. And she, as I said earlier, wasn’t sweating.

Now on to Lumber.

He seems like a nice guy. Although, he also seems a bit racist. But I guess his actions are excusable due to his son being in possible danger. As a matter of fact, I thought I saw something in his eyes when he first saw me.

Normally, when you look at an alien near your son, or any relative for that matter, you either feel a sense of panic or fear. Lum? That nigga strolled right up to me.....like he was angry at something else.

Strange.

I know it’s not normal to have a fast-thinking mind like this, and I’ve been told this so many times back on Earth. People feared my strange power of deduction and foresight, and therefore, alienated themselves from me. I can’t help it. Once my brain gets going, it just doesn’t want to stop.

“Silas...”

Sometimes, it gets to a point where people just seem to fade away from existence. And after that, I’m just left with me and my thoughts. I’ve been known to freeze for entire blocks in school, which is about an hour and fifteen minutes, which is a long time to be stuck in one position.

“Silas! Hello?”

I remember how in sixth grade, Mrs. Clarke thought I was going into a coma because she asked me an advanced question while I was standing in front of her desk. The doctor’s report said that I just stood there, with my hand on my chin and my mouth open...staring. Mrs.Clarke retired when I graduated.

“Answer me damn it! SILAS!”

It’s not just limited to school either. Hell, it even happened in weird-ass places like supermarkets or hospitals. I remember how my mom was feeling lazy and sent me to the supermarket up the road in order to get some shit for the house. I had left the list, and right as I entered the supermarket, I tried remembering everything that was on that list. From the security cameras, it looked fucking hilarious as people walked by me. Some of them even tried snapping me out of it.

There was even that one time where a guy slapped me in the face when I-

*Smack!*

“Huh? What?” I shook my head, trying to clear my eyes of the dots of light that had appeared in them. No, it wasn’t from the hit. It was from when I...

....Was lost in thought.

“Damn it, not again!” Looks like it followed me over from Earth.

“It’s about time you noticed me standing here! I was starting to get a little worried that a Himallama Earwig had crawled in your brain and devoured it!”

Speak of the devil....

“Hi Sunset Shimmer,” I drawled out in a disappointed and bored tone. A tone she was not so happy about, because she instantly frowned, “How may I help you?”

“You could drop the attitude for starters. Next, you can tell me why you were shouting into the night sky. Some ponies actually live in the woods you happen to shout in.” She dragged her last sentence out accusingly, pointing a hoof at my chest for emphasis.

I glowered at her. This conversation quickly went into the dumps.

“Ponies who aren’t welcome in towns owned and ran by minotaurs? You mean like you?” I smiled smugly as my jab found its mark, her frown deepening into a glare of her own.

“How DARE you! No one even gives you the time of day besides Jack-Jack, and he doesn’t count because he’s a little boy! How can you stand here and berate me when you’re an outcast yourself! It’s hypocritical!” She waved the hoof she still had extended about in a tantrum.

Gotcha’ Bitch!

“So you admit you’re an outcast? What for?” I wanna get inside this Sunset Shimmer! See what goes on under her skin!

.....No, not like that.

“You! I! But! When! GAH! You’re insufferable! And you still didn’t answer my question!” She was blushing. Cute, but you’re not getting out of this one.

“I was minding my own business. What were you doing listening in on what I was doing?” She deflated and lowered herself bashfully.

I have you now.

“In fact, you would have to be pretty close in order to hear what I was saying, provided that my shouts were just me adding some force to my words! So; Ms. Shimmer, the question is....were you spying on me?” I already knew the answer. I just wanted to be an asshole.

“.....Yes.” She turned her head away from me. Sunset Shimmer...the Mare of Mystery. What are you doing?

“Why.” It came out as a demand more than a question. She flinched.

“Be...Because I find you interesting! I’ve always been fascinated with outer space and the belief that other forms of life could exist! That’s why I moved out of Equestria and came here, to the Himallamas in Bullivia! It’s the nation with the highest mountains and the greatest view of the stars! Sure, I might’ve been the Personal Student of Princess Celestia, but I just couldn’t stand being surrounded by those...those....” She trailed off as her rant caused her to twirl her hoof in the air.

“Bigots?” I offered with a raised eyebrow.

“Yesssss....Those bigots! It was all for my family’s status that I even tried so hard in that accursed hellhole known as the School for Gifted Unicorns! I learned absolutely nothing....nothing! Once I became old enough to make my own decisions without the fear of familial scorn, I told Princess Celestia how I felt from day one. She was heartbroken, but she could see the passion in my eyes about finding out if extraterrestrials were real! That’s when I experienced the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me!” Sunset Shimmer declared as she stared me in my face. I had an idea on what she was talking about.

“She paid all expenses for your journey here?” I ventured, to which she just frowned.

“It’s my story! You’re not supposed to ruin it!” She practically whined while I gave a chuckle. The mare certainly didn’t act her age.

“Oops! My bad,” I stated sarcastically as I leaned against my rover and slid down until I could feel the warm grass and earth under my ass. I then looked at Sunset Shimmer and patted the ground to the left of me, which was closest to her, “Pop a squat. You wanted to know why I was shoutin', right?” She nodded slowly as she tentatively walked over to the spot I had indicated.

During her slow progress, I noticed how she kept looking at me and then my rover, and then back to me.

“It’s not gonna bite you,” I started bemusedly, to which she casted an unsure glance at me, “Hurry up!” She complied instantly. Once she got to the spot I indicated, she did that little turning thing all animals do before they lay down.

And then...well she laid down. What else can I say.

Well, she had gotten closer to me than what I would’ve prefered. I could feel her body’s heat through my arm. It actually felt...like...sunset.

Ha ha, laugh it up.

“Don’t tell anyone this. I had recently found out that an ancient language from my planet activates the diamond sword on my back. If I don’t speak the phrase, the sword’s blade is practically useless and doesn’t cut through anything. But when I do, I feel as if there’s nothing my sword can’t cut through. Also, by the little spat we shared earlier, I also noticed how my sword was capable of absorbing your magic. I felt none of the pressure from your ray, just to let you know.” I added with a giggle.

“You should know, however, that I was holding back on you. If I had deemed you too dangerous, I would’ve wasted no ample amount of time in getting rid of you. What you felt was me using the lowest-level spell I knew. And by the looks of it when I added more force to the beam, you seemed to struggle with the new amount, before walking again.” Sunset Shimmer stated as she grinned victoriously.

“You’re right. But that still doesn’t change the fact that I was walking into a ray of magic and not feeling anything. This sword,” I bent forward and used a claw to reveal my sword and its sheath from under my mane, “Must have some sort of Anti-Magic effect. If it’s magical or superpowered, my sword can nullify it.” I responded with a look of determination.

“My only problem is, what would I need a sword like this for? It’s not like I’m going to go around in this rover of mine and start hacking up every unicorn in the world.” I gave a chuckle at how silly that sounded, closing my eyes and everything. When I opened them again, I couldn’t help but notice the look on Sunset Shimmer’s face.

She was about two seconds away from shitting bricks.

“I didn’t mean it! I didn’t mean it,” I added quickly, waving my hands just as quick in a passive manner, “I’m never gonna be able to fit in if I went around and did that! It’d be counterproductive!” I finished with a lame smile and a blush on my own cheeks as Sunset Shimmer gave a sigh of relief. She then followed that sigh with a chuckle, raising a hoof to her mouth in order to suppress it, even if it did next to nothing.

“Counterproductive to what, exactly?” She asked as I looked up to the sky, and thought about how time had flown out the window. It was already night time, and there was a full moon out. Couldn’t help but think of Princess Luna and how she raised the moon every night. She must of been in a good mood for the sky to look so good.

“To fitting in. I have a responsibility as an extraterrestrial to carry out.” I said with a hint of pride. Earth would be proud.

“For who, exactly? Why do you feel the need to prove yourself to others? What I’m trying to ask is, what does Silas want to do? Not Silas the Alien.” She finished with a friendly shove in my arm.

I froze.

“Er....I don’t understand the question.” I replied honestly. I’m not grasping what she was throwing out there.

“You know what I mean. What is it that you want to do?”

Goddamn it.

How...How could I have not thought of this.

This planet...this body....it’s my escape from Earth and all the shit I had to put up with for the sixteen years of my life. How did it take me this long to figure that out? I was so busy in playing the ‘Good Invader’ role that I hadn’t given any real thought in what I wanted to do.

All the heartache. All the pain. It doesn’t exist here. Everything that had me shackled to my old life was broken when I awoke as Silas Epista. And yet, here I was, getting ready to revert back to my old days. Afraid of letting go. Afraid of moving on.

Afraid...of change.

“Silas? Silas you’re crying.” I snapped out of it and hastily wiped my eyes. She was right. What have I been doing? I’ve given little to no thought about my needs. I’ve been doing nothing but seeking approval from other people.

I hadn’t changed a thing.

....And I was alright with it.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

“S-Sorry. You didn’t need to see that.” I said quickly, getting ready to stand up and walk away from her. A gold hoof held me fast.

“Yes. Yes I did. You don’t have to apologize to me, Silas. Just know that....I’m here for you. No matter what. We don’t have to be alone anymore.” I couldn’t pull myself away from her pleading eyes that seemed on the brink of tears themselves.

“I...I....” I couldn’t think straight, my mind feeling like a lake that had just been hit with a boulder, “........Thank you.” I smiled at her. It was all I could do. She returned the gesture and yawned heavily.

“It’s getting late. I should head back home and get som-”

“Hey,” I interrupted, causing her to look at me with a neutral expression, “Stay here. With me...if only for tonight. I’m kind of comfortable right now. And it’s been ages since I felt tired.” I said while rubbing the back of my head. I blame the moon for my current behavior right now.

That, and all the years spent hating the human race with all my heart and soul.

“Sure.” She smiled as I adjusted myself to get more comfortable. I even took off my jacket and folded it up, making a makeshift pillow for her as I crossed my legs criss-crossed-applesauce.

She chuckled as she noticed me struggling to take up the awkward position.

“It’s not funny. You try having inverted knees.” I responded with a fake glare, knowing she meant no real disrespect by it.

“Yes...yes it was.” Sunset Shimmer responded as she laid her head down atop of my leg. She couldn’t see my blush now. Good.

“You’re jacket’s comfortable. Thanks.” And my blush intensifies. Thanks body. You’re a true friend! “And you’re warm and toasty.” Now she’s taunting me.

“Shut up and sleep. I’ll be giving some thought on what you said to me earlier before I hit the hay myself. I need to know what I always wanted to do.” I replied curtly, a little mad that she decided teasing me was okay after she tore down all my protective walls.

“...Whatever.” And with that, she spoke no more.

And neither did I.

For the first time since I got here, I fell asleep.