My Little Snips

I was struttin though tha concrete jungle. My fuckin eyez droopy as suttin' droopy. I was never phat at similarities. Put ya muthafuckin choppers up if ya feel dis! Da ghetto looked grey. Da ghetto was once laid back but Everythang Chizzled When tha Fire Nation Attacked............. Naw just kidd'en every last muthafuckin thang is fine. I be just chillaxed n' have´en a hangover n' shit. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. So every last muthafuckin thang n' mah playas is complete shiznit n' aint a thugged-out damn thang dat yo' ass can do.

I continued mah quest ta tha local Mac'Donalds. I put up in mah headphones n' played some struttin beatz. Drop dis like itz hot! Da cold lil' woo wop dat played was Gangsta Biatch by Apache fo' realz. A smile crept its way acrossed mah grill a tha eva elegant n' sophisticated lyrics pimped mah eardrums.

My fuckin happinizz was cut off short by some prick bumpin tha fuck into mah dirty ass. "O I be terribly sorry, mah phat man. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I didn´t mean ta bump tha fuck into yo thugged-out ass. I was bein straight-up careless, I be sorry."Da playa holla'd soundin sorry.

I looked at his ass fo' a while before deckin his ass up in tha face. "If mah playas bumps tha fuck into me, they mo' betta catch fade!!!!" I yelled. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I looked down ta peep dat I knocked his ass out. I looked ta mah left, then ta mah right ta peep no one. I quickly took tha opportunitizzle ta snag tha pimps wallet. With dat I ran off ta git some eats.

Without me knowin a funky-ass box was up in mah way. I tripped. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! (SURPRISE). I hit tha ground wit a thud. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "Muthafucka Fucker" I holla'd as I picked mah dirty ass up. I looked all up in tha box dat shiznit was old, dirty, n' covered up in stains. I strutted over ta tha box wit mah pocket knife locked n loaded ta bust a cap up in any zombies yo. Hay you never know. I approached tha box, tha smell of urine filled mah nostrils. "Well, it smells like mah ex-wife." I holla'd as I held mah nozzle shut.

I lifted tha top of tha box open wit mah foot. I looked down ta peep a weird lookin buggin horse."O mah stars n' gardaz itz most shitty pony.".............."Bye" I holla'd as I turned ta muthafuckin bounce fo' realz. As I fuckin started strutting, suttin' clapped on mah pant leg. I looked down, ta peep tha baby Snips on mah leg. "GET OFF MY LEG YOU LIL SHIT!!!!!" I screamed kickin his ass off.

My fuckin beatboxin n' abuse caused his ass ta cry up in distress. Da bustin up like a biatch masked, tha sound of approachin footsteps. "O daddy, look a funky-ass baby horse!!!! Can we keep him?" A lil' voice holla'd behind mah dirty ass. I turned round ta peep a playa wit a lil' lil girl.

"I don't, know Susie. I be thinkin it belongs ta dat man."

"Hay whoz ass da fuck is yo slick ass?" I growled.

"Um hello, I was wonderin if I could loot dat pony?" Da playa holla'd.

"O well, up in dat case........" "Fuck off." I yelled as I socked his ass up in tha face.

"Daddy!" Da lil hoe screamed as she ran over ta her unconscious father.

"Well lil Susie, you hustled a valuable lesson todizzle. It make me wanna hollar playa! Life is full of disappointments, so git tha fuck outta mah grill wit dat bullshit." I holla'd pickin up tha now gigglin Snips n' struttin off. "So you like violins?" I holla'd holdin his ass up in tha air. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. "We might git along afta all........" I was caught off by warm liquid hittin mah shirt. " Well maybe if I sand down yo' horn, you can pass as a puppy fo' realz. And I can bust you ta a gangbangin' fightin cage.

At Mah Pad

I opened tha door ta mah doggy den n' all up in tha colt on tha couch yo. Dude was gigglin like mad as his thugged-out lil' punk-ass bounced. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "DON'T YOU DARE LAUGH, I SMELL LIKE PISS THANKS TO YOU!!!!!!!" I yelled, causin his ass ta seece his fuckin laughter n' shiznit yo. Dude just looked all up in mah grill wit teary eye's. "O don't you dare." I holla'd up in a thugged-out demandin tone.

His eyez fuckin started ta fill up wit tears. "Wait um...." I fuckin started searchin round frantically fo' suttin' ta distract his muthafuckin ass. My fuckin eyez light up as I saw tha T.V. remote. I quickly turned it on ta Nick Toons fo' realz. A picture of a yellow sponge rocked up on tha screen. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. "O gay fo' realz. It aint nuthin but tha freshly smoked up onez no one wants to...." I was caught of by laughter n' shit. I looked over ta peep tha lil mutant wit his wild lil' fuckin eye´s glued ta tha screen. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. "Kind of remindz you of yo' oldschool game huh, biatch? Two dum shits causin chaos, you know Snails n' yo slick ass?"

Either da ruffneck didn't KNOW or da thug was ignorin mah dirty ass. Because he kept lookin all up in tha t.v. I left tha room ta go chizzle knowin da thug wasn't goin anywhere, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. I opened mah closet ta peep different shirts, n' you can put dat on yo' toast. "I might as well take a shower." I grabbed mah shirt, pants, etc n' headed towardz tha bathroom.

20 miz lata

I tossed mah dirty threadz tha fuck into tha hamper, meanin tha floor. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Cause whoz ass gives a gangbangin' flyin fuck. Then strutted mah way towardz tha door ta checkup on tha baby Snips yo. Dude was passed up on tha couch. "Daw he looks like, me when I be sauced."

What, biatch? In tha mah lil Dashie rap tha skanky fuck gets stuck wit her fo' 16 years; If Snips is like 7 or 8 up in tha show dat means........... FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!