“Mate, wake your sorry arse up! Scootaloo is looking for you, and she looks bloody pissed!” Pip screams as he violently shakes me.

Having my wonderful friend scream and shake me is such a grand way to wake up. I slightly open my eyes to look at the alarm clock on the side table next to the couch. Eight in the morning...really Pip...really... Now, being the great friend that I am, I do the only sensible thing I could think of.

Zzzz..., I roll over, and drown out my friends cautions with soft snores.

“I ain’t gonna tell ya again, wake up! Scoots looks like she'll murder a MANTICORE right now!”

“Can’t help ya, I’m asleep.” I groggily mumble, resembling a certain earth pony...

Zzzz..,snoring a bit louder and more obnoxiously .

“Fine! I’ll show, you not to ignore me! I’ma let Scoots in the house. I’m sure you didn’t even hear the doorbell ring.” Pip remarks, as he walks towards the door.

My eyes shoot open so fast i could hear the rippling of muscles attached to them WHAAAT...I’m going to have to rethink this whole friendship...Later, though. Now, it’s time to go!! I launch off the couch and frantically looked for my spare pair of pants Pip loaned me, I am not about to be caught without my pants again! Spotting the pair of trousers on the floor I quickly grab them of slip them on.

Just as I am about to reach for my shirt, I hear a loud bang coming from the door; as well as Pip yelling.

“OWW,my face!! You could’ve waited until I opened the door Sco-MRMRMRPHF!” Pip was quieted by Scootaloo, as she walks over the dismantled door with Pip underneath.

Wasting no time, I ignore my shirt and start running towards the back door when I hear the scariest sound of the day.

“Oh Rumble~ Come out, come out wherever you are! I just wanna have a nice and quiet chat with you~!” Scootaloo chimes, her tone resembling a deprived mare in heat.

Oh HELL NO! I am out of here! I burst through the backdoor, sprinting as fast as I possibly can to try and get away from the seductively psychotic mare.

I continue sprinting non stop for a good 2 or 3 minutes before I start to slow down to a stop. Panting, I spot a dark alley that I can hide in. I take a couple steps inside and slouch against the wall, following it down until I am sitting on the ground. Reaching inside my pocket, I pull out my Ipony, connect my earphones, and set my songs to shuffle.

Waiting for the the music to start, I stand up and pat some dirt off that I acquired from sitting on the ground. I look up to the sky and and the music starts.

If I die and go to Hell real soon
It will appear to me as this room
And for eternity, I'd lay in bed
In my boxers, half stoned,
With the pillow under my head

Bobbing my head up and down to the beat, I begin to softly sing as I walk towards the on place Scoots wouldn’t think to look, my house.

I'd be chatting on the interweb
Maggots pray upon the living dead
had no interest in the things she said
On the phone every day, I'll permanently hit the hay
I called her on the phone and she touched herself
She touched herself,
She touched herself
I Called her on the phone and she touched herself
I laughed myself to sleep

I begin to get really into the song, singing slightly louder than before while slightly dancing down the road.

At this rate, I'll be heading for electric chairs
I'm only human with my cross to bear
When she described her underwear
I forgot all the rules my rabbi taught me in the old schul
You're too young to be this empty girl
I'll prepare you for a sick, dark world
Know that you'll be my downfall
But I call and I call and I call

My voice getting louder and louder as I walked through the streets, grabbing attention to myself from everyone. Probably not the best idea, but at this point I couldn’t care less.

I called her on the phone and she touched herself
She touched herself, she touched herself
I Called her on the phone and she touched herself
I laughed myself to sleep

Unbeknownst to me, my singing is loud enough to be heard all around ponyville. And now I had a follower silently watching me from above.

I don't know what I want
I don't know what I want
I don't know what I want
I don't know what I want
I don't know what I want (Met you on the Ponynet)
I don't know what I want (Met you on the Ponynet)
I don't know what I want (Met you on the Ponynet)
I don't know what I want (Met you on the Ponynet)
I called her on the phone and she touched herself
She touched herself,
She touched herself
Called her on the phone and she touched herself
I laughed myself to sleep
I called her on the phone and she touched herself
She touched herself,
She touched herself
Called her on the phone and she touched herself
I laughed myself to sleep

The song comes to an end right as I walk into my room. I yawn, realizing I just ran across town at eight in the morning. I quickly kick off my shoes, and throw my pants and shirt into a heap of dirty clothes; and make the short journey from my hamper to my bed. Within a minute, I’m laying in my bed, and readying for another few hours of sleep.

CRASH!

I quickly duck under my covers, unsure of what just happened. Did something land on me? Nah, I mean it feels like...There’s a pony on me? Slowly, I push the blanket from over my head; only to find Scootaloo sitting atop me. My eyes widen in a flash, and I slam against the headboard of my bed as I recoil away from the intruder. “Scoot-Scootaloo?!? What the hell are you doing here?”

“Oh, nothing really. Just came by to talk to you. By the way, you have a great voice.” She replies coolly, as if nothing unusual happened.

“Okay, you’re here. What do you want to talk about?” I ask in fear.

“I just wanted an apology for rudely crashing into me...” Scootaloo softly responds, a blush causing her to look away from me.

“Is that all? Well I’m so-” In a flash, Scootaloo darts in and plants her lips on mine.

Damn...Flitter and Cloudchaser were right, Scoots does have a thing for me... Not one to be outdone, I start to push my tongue into her mouth; the battle for power having now begun. Back and forth, the struggle for dominance raged on for what seemed like hours. She pushed inside and wrestled me for control, then I did the same. In a second, and without a word, I flip Scootaloo over, pinning her beneath me. I break contact with her lips and gaze in those wonderful purple eyes, panting all the while.Scootaloo, however, takes this moment of respite as an opportunity to flip the tables on me, pushing me backwards, and starts straddling me.

I move my hands up the orange mares body, relishing her athletic build. “Damn Scoots, you got more curves than a race track.”

Scootaloo just rolls her eyes at me while leaning in close to my ears.“Why don’t you leave the sexy talk to me okay? Sexy stallions are meant to be seen, not heard” She purrs while slowly trailing her fingers up and down my chest. “Besides...by the time I’m done with you...you won’t be able to talk for a long time” She says while nibbling on my ears softly.

An involuntary shudder slithers down my spine as I just submit to her devices. I smile dumbly, as Scootaloo begins to sensually undress; slowly, she removes her shirt, inch by inch until she pulls it completely off, her large breasts bouncing in place.

I stare dumbly at the mounds in front of as a blush creeped up on my face. Scootaloo looks down and grins.

“Like what you see big boy?” She purrs while squishing her bountiful mounds between her arms.

“Uh huh.” Really!? That’s the best I can think of? C’mon Rumble! Scoots just giggles at my reaction.

“So...are you just gonna stare...or are you gonna be stallion enough to take care of your mare.” I break away from her breasts to look up at her eyes. I repress another shiver as it dawns on me that Scoots has the most seductive gaze on the planet.

With a goofy grin, I begin to rapidly nod my head, while silently giggling. I wrap my arms around her waist, and pull her down for another kiss. Duh... It slowly dawns on me that my brain is functioning at half capacity, and that I’ve been holding Scootaloo for an eternity. Cautiously, I start to unbutton her jeans, and slowly pull them off.

I casually toss her pants to the side, and decide to start to tease her. I sit up quickly, and force her onto her back; she pulls me in for yet another kiss, and I decide now is the time to strike. I slip my right hand down and begin exploring her body; my first stop is at her mountainous boobs, and slowly whisks down south. I rub her lower lips slowly, which elicits a moan from the orange pegasus. “D-damnit, Rumbleeee-OH CELESTIA YES!” I cut her off by sliding my middle finger into Scoots slit, making sure to set a nice, steady pace.

A devious grin works its way onto my face, and I decide to push her limits. I slip my index finger in as well, albeit it being a tight squeeze, and start picking up speed with each thrust. “MMMM Oh Luna!, YES!” without warning, a warm, wet sensation envelopes my fingers, and looking down I see a very wet spot under Scootaloo. “Rumble...I-that...That was awesome... I didn’t know you were so dextrous.”

“Ow...” My brain decides to boot back up, and I realize that although she got off, I didn’t. And it’s starting to hurt! “Sc-Scootaloo...I-I need release!” I scream louder than I should.

“Well, since you were so awesome, I guess...I guess I can help you with that little problem of yours.” She coos, while spreading her marehood; beckoning for me to ravish her.

I slowly crawl towards her, eventually ending up hovering above her. “How do you expect to do anything with your boxers still on?” I look down in embarrassment, realizing that I had yet to take my own underwear off.

“The fact that I forgot to take off my underwear stays a secret.” I groan as I slip my boxers off.

Scoots giggles in response, and slowly nods her head. “Hmm, Y’know, nopony would ever know you were packing that much heat by looking at you.”

I position myself at the entrance of the orange mare, and start pushing in. Damn it’s a tight fit...Almost uncomfortably tight...Almost. I grunt as I try to push farther and farther in; and after a lot of resistance, finally make my way completely in. I pull back and thrust back in, this time a bit faster; her love tunnel still suffocating my stallionhood. “Celestia be damned...You’re one tight mare, Scoots.”

Scoots again just giggles at me in response, before answering me, “You’re not used to this huh? That's okay...neither am I...I’ve been saving myself...just...for...you”

Shocked at what she said I quickly look down and notice Eeyup...that's blood...Oh Scoots... I smile at the beauty before me, and chuckle softly.

“I’m gonna make sure you won’t ever regret this Scoots...I promise” I say before I begin to pick up my pace. Thrusting in and out, faster and faster. All the while, Scoots moans of pure bliss encouraging me to ravage her beautiful cunt more and more. Something primal filling me, the urge to please and dominate taking over; the combination of lust and adrenaline flooding my blood stream.

"Uhhhnnn R-R-Rumble! I d-di-didn't thi-think you haaaa-had it in you!" Scootaloo yells.

Getting bored of this position, I flip Scoots over so her back is showing those beautiful wings of hers fully erect, a clear sign she is just as aroused as I am. Grinning to myself I start pounding away again, only this time I bring my hands to her wings and begin to massage them right where the joints attach to her back. My touch seems too much for Scoots, as I am awarded with a loud moan, as well as more femcum beginning to flow out of Scoots snatch almost non stop.

Feeling my own pressure building up, I increase my pace, going even faster than before while leaning over her and using my mouth to nibble on the edges of her feathers.

Close...so close..just..a...bit...more Again I hear Scoots moan loudly, her marehood tightening up even more around my member.

“Scoots...I-I’m there, dude...!”

“O-o-hhh, inside...do it ins-s-side, its okay I’m s-s-safe t-t-oday” Scoots stutters between each animalistic thrust.

I slow my thrusts, making each one harder and deeper; until, at last, with one final thrust I hilt myself in Scoots; reaching her womb, and emptying my load. Celestia be damned...looks like Neigh Orleans after that hurricane...

Exhausted, all I can do is fall down on top of her, and bask in the warmth of her embrace. I roll from atop her and opt to wrap my arm around Scootaloo, who is now passed out.

You know...I woke up today scared for my life...and now here I am happier than I’ve ever been before...let’s just hope my sisters don’t get home...SHIT MY SISTERS, WHAT TIME IS IT I quickly glance over to alarm clock and notice that it is 2 pm. “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, they are gonna be here soon, I have to wake Scoots before-”

CREAK

The sound of my door opening, made me freeze in panic. Slowly I turn my head towards the door, where I see both Flitter and CC staring at me with the most furious gazes they could possibly muster. Silence reigned in the room before finally both of them spoke up.

“Looks like you had an eventful day, Rumble...” Cloudchaser angrily mumbles.

“What the fuck?!? You did it with her first? Rumble you better have a legitimate reason for this...” Flitter chimes in.

Panic begins to cloud my mind, already being tired from my activities, I do the most reasonable thing any stallion would do in this situation. I pass out with my arm around Scootaloo.

Author's Note

HERE IT IS DAMMIT. (Oh and a Beavis and Butthead reference for you guys)-Me (Theta)
Bet you can't figure out what the title means!-Vic Viper
Oh, and if you can't tell, this is our first clop writing~EVER!
EDIT 8/22/2013: Yes I put in a hurricane joke. It's terrible. Disregard it. I am formally apologizing for my dark (and dry) sense of humor. Sorry if it offends you, I will now beat myself into a bloody pulp because of it.