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Some stories are of the happy ponies with happy lives and happy endings, learning important lessons through the magic of friendship.
Some stories don’t even feature the main characters of the works of art they are portrayed from; instead, original characters are developed. Even then, by overcoming great personal trials and suffering, these defiantly outstanding characters forge their own paths through incredible and inspiring works of fiction.

This is not one of those stories.

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Crick.
“Ow.”
Crick.
“Ow.”
… Crick.
“Ow.”

Brink Slipper rubbed his aching neck with one hoof, his heavy guard’s armor repeatedly getting in the way. The crick in his neck simply would not go away, no matter how he massaged it. Rolling his neck in an attempt to allay his pain, the pegasus stared up in boredom at the night sky.

It was always boring in this section of Canterlot. Some of the guards even referred to it as a punishment now and then; in hindsight, he should be grateful that Guard Captain Shining Armor hadn’t simply demoted him on the spot for sleeping on the job.

Brink groaned in self-pity, shifting his sight down to his dark tan forelegs, wondering how he managed to get himself into this position in the first place. It might not be so bad, if only it weren’t so unbearably boring. The richer part of Canterlot never had anything exciting happen. Ever.
Rich, wealthy ponies wallowing in their own prosperity. White picket fences, identical buildings, every single lamppost pristine and shining in the night. Hardly a single patch of shadow throughout the entire area where any potential danger could ever hide.
Bo~ring.

This was almost as bad as discovering that some new punk had replaced him; what was his name… Sentry? Now, that guy was boring. No personality, whatsoever. Brink grumbled wistfully as he rearranged his armor, leaning against the light pole. He should be in the palace right now, doing his royal duty to serve the princesses, not stuck down in No-Action-Central. He desperately wished, that for just once, something exciting would happen.

The lilac shooting star whizzing above him granted his wish.

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Ryan Miller hurtled through the night sky as the crackling whips of violet energy whirled around him hungrily, vaguely aware that he was moving at very high speeds.
He had almost achieved consciousness before slamming violently into the ground.

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Brink galloped as hard as he could in the direction of the violet star, watching in shock and horror as it careened into a building top, bouncing lithely off of it and knocking off several clay shingles. They shattered as they hit the ground around him, and the star slammed into the dirt in the middle of the street with so much force that the billowing wind from the impact buffeted him backwards. He stood his ground, pushing further forward as he attempted to ignore the almightily annoying crick in his neck.

Not out of bravery, mind you; Brink was certain that whatever had landed was somehow of great importance, though. Massive flaming purple chunks flying out of the sky didn’t exactly happen every night, especially when they landed in the middle of the street.
First one on the scene.
The first one to respond, the first to take action. Oh, he wasn’t just going back to his old position of door guard at the castle; oh ho, no, this was his ticket to big time promotion.
They might even make me… Guard Captain…! Brink thought to himself gleefully as he approached the smoldering crater, satisfying thoughts of crudely booting that snide lummox Shining Armor out of his seat and taking it for himself.

So great was his excitement, he almost didn’t notice the freakishly tall, nearly hairless monstrosity slowly drawing itself to its full height. As he grew closer to the still-sparking crater, arcs of lavender electricity grounding out as they crawled over the ground, Brink Slipper suddenly realized that this was a very, very bad idea.

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Ryan groaned in agony, lying face down in the dirt. His eyes tightly closed, he sluggishly attempted to take inventory of his limbs. Wriggling his fingers first, then his arms, and finally his legs.
… How the fuck am I alive? He wondered stupidly. It was difficult to think, like his brain had been clogged with molasses. He groggily pushed himself up with his elbows, staring at his arms in dim surprise. Ryan realized two very important things simultaneously.

First of all, whereas his old scars that littered his body were still firmly in place, he had no new injuries. No cuts, no scrapes, no burns; absolutely no indication whatsoever that he’d just slammed into the ground at nearly MACH FUCKING FOUR. It boggled his mind how such a thing was even possible.
Secondly, his hands were no longer his own.
Technically, they were still hands… however, they’d gained an oddly animated look to them. For a moment, he wondered if somebody had slipped something into one of his drinks again.
God, was that a bad day.

After a few moments of ogling his hands as he flexed them, light wisps of purple steam roiling up from his skin and vanishing into the air, Ryan realized that he was not alone. Pushing away from the ground, he woozily drew himself up to his full height. At nearly seven feet tall, Ryan could be fairly imposing when he wanted to. Greasy locks of unkempt black hair fell over his eyes, giving him a mildly bestial look.
Not nearly as bestial as the creature cowering before him, however.

… Ohhhhh, shit. I am SO high right now, aren’t I?

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Brink Slipper skidded to a halt in front of the beast as it grew larger and larger the closer he came to it. It positively loomed over him, beady black eyes glinting in the moonlight with an almost demonic gleam. It bared its teeth as it scowled, revealing a row of what appeared to be filed, sharp fangs.

He tripped over his own hooves in his fear and haste to back away, armor clinking heavily as he pulled away from the monster. The pale demon dragged itself out of the crater, glaring hungrily at him as it stood silhouetted against the crescent moon. Brink almost expected it to howl dramatically or something, but it merely stood at the edge of the crater, watching him with silent contempt.

“H-h-h-halt!” Brink stuttered, pulling a small spear from his side. “I-i-i-i-in the- in-in-in the name of…!”
The pale demon crossed the distance between them effortlessly, nearly gliding over the ground in ragged attire. Brink bolted away, the pain in his neck shooting directly into his eyes.

Move! Move! Remember your training! Move!

The monster charged him as it screamed with an abominable glee, appendages outstretched with wiry, spiderlike ends, snatching at him with claws of death…!

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“Bonsai, asshole!” Ryan roared as he bounded over the shaking alien, landing easily on the other side of the quadruped. The tan guard pegasus looked like he was nearly about to soil his iron armor.

Of course, that only caused Ryan’s shark-like grin to widen. He hit the ground with a fwump! and used the momentum to pick up speed, dirty and torn sneakers slapping against the cobblestones beneath him. His filthy blue jeans and slightly burned black tee shirt ruffled slightly in the wind. Behind him, Ryan could hear the shaking guard pony stubbornly regaining his composure. He’d give him that much – the little bastard recovered from shock awfully quickly. No matter; he had the lead.
Quickly scheming, Ryan’s eyes darted around his new surroundings. Tall buildings, light posts holding back the dark… it was like some medieval Brooklyn, minus people. Speaking of people… there didn’t seem to be any people around. Not even any more of the illusory ponies like the one he’d just leaped over.

Of course it was just an illusion, a hallucination; he had a strangely altered perception, his memory was foggy. He doubted it was anything but drugs. A small voice in the back of his head dimly reminded himself that he shouldn’t attempt to fly.
Which was odd, in and of itself – the very fact that he retained the capacity to contemplate such things displayed his inherent ability to apply logic to the situation, attempting to escape in a manner that wouldn’t alert too many of the locals.
Which, in his mind, came out as Fuck fuck fuck fuck I gotta get outta here!

Ryan Miller was not necessarily the brightest of souls.

The clanking of the guard pony behind him grew louder, shouts of ‘cease and desist’ echoing through the streets as he swiftly grabbed a lamppost on a corner and used it to swing himself at a ninety-degree angle, running as fast and hard as he could. Several more ponies were poking their heads out of windows in bleary amazement at the spectacle, some lights flickering on here and there. If he didn’t hurry, he was going to be caught; and, judging from the point on that spear, it wouldn’t matter how high he was.

If something looked like it was going to hurt if you touched it, then it was probably going to hurt.

He grimly darted down yet another dark alley, ruckus steadily growing behind him as the guard followed close on his heels. Ryan hurriedly took inventory of his possessions, hoping for something he could throw or use as a distraction as he felt quickly through his grimy blue jeans. The folded paper in his back pocket wouldn’t hurt very much if he threw it, and the silver Zippo lighter he carried might be useful. However, he could spot nothing flammable in the immediate area he ran through, which was strange enough for a back alley; no trash. His wallet and old Nokia seemed to be missing, unfortunately. He spotted his salvation in the last place he’d have expected it; a small, open window with mauve curtains billowing out into the night air, music and laughter coming from inside.
A party.
A party that he could easily use as distraction whilst he slipped away.

Ryan’s grin grew wider.

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Exie was not your average pony.

At least, she didn’t believe so. Her peach colored body rippled through the crowd with a feminine grace, deep rose colored mane flowing behind her. A single black bow adorned her head, standing stark against the shock of red. Her bright, baby blue eyes picked out the elder gray pony reclining in the room’s corner, quietly watching the party as she sipped at a cup of tea. Padded hooves treaded over the wooden floor, steps softened by the black silk she wore on all hooves. The stylishly cut thigh-highs garnered no small amount of attention as she passed, and a burning heat rose in her cheeks as she marched steadily forward.

A cyan blue earth pony passing her winked lustily at her. He looked familiar, but she couldn’t quite put a name to the face. Perhaps it was because of the sporadically dancing lighting in the already darkened room. A problem she’d had frequently; but, then again, when you rarely spend more than a single night with somepony, names become less important after a while than, say… performance. Cyan Pony watched her bouncing Cutie Mark with something akin to admiration, observing as the full heart with a single price tag attached charmingly bobbed this way and that.

“Hey.” She said a little more loudly than she needed to over the music provided by a white pony in the center of the room, blasting out techno. “Hey!” she shouted, waving her hoof in front of the lanky gray pony, catching her attention.
“Enjoying your goodbye party, Exie?” the older mare asked, a kind twinkle to her eye. Ecstasy’s smile grew as she hugged the gray unicorn gratefully. Cashmere had taken her in when she needed somepony most; she had done more than that. She’d provided for her at every turn, always looking out for her. To Ecstasy, Cashmere was like a (fairly old) mother figure. A little old fashioned for her tastes, but reliable.

“… ‘Course I am, you crazy old coot.” She said warmly, releasing her from the embrace. It was a little white lie; and, in all likelihood, Cashmere knew it. If she did, though, she wasn’t letting on.

The unicorn lightly pushed a shoulder length lock of bright blue mane out of her face, smiling back. “I just hope you know what you’re getting yourself into, darlin’ - running a business is never quite as easy as some ponies would have you believe.”
“Look, I’ve got this,” Exie said confidently, looking about the room at the dancing ponies. She didn’t know any of them, personally; as far as she knew, Cashmere had simply handed out invitations. She rearranged the black bow atop her head, trying to look a little taller.

“Of course you do, of course you do.” Cashmere agreed half-heartedly, patting her on the head. “I’m certain that you’ll do just fine when you open up the new branch for Sew Fine; why, I’ll bet ponies will be kicking the door in, just to get at some Nightmare Night apparel.”
Exie snorted, leaning back against the wall with the older unicorn. “Yeah…” she said uncertainly. “About that. Are you sure that opening up a branch in some little hick town is really gonna bring in the business? I mean, Ponyville really doesn’t seem like much of a gravy train.”
“Oh, almost forgot…!” Cashmere started, levitating up a single train ticket. Exie briefly wondered where she’d gotten it from, as she hadn’t seen the older mare carrying any kind of bag or purse.

“Here you go, kiddo – fully paid ticket, first class.”
“Oh, you didn’t have to –“
“Of course I did.” Cashmere insisted, pushing the ticket at her until she grabbed it in her mouth. Exie deftly slipped it into the black slip on her left hoof, tucking it between the silky fabric and its several enticing rips. “I haven’t been able to get you anything nice since you left Manehattan; consider it my… going away present.”

Exie gave her a light kiss on the cheek, snuggling up next to the elder unicorn. “Aww… you are just the sweetest thing ever.”
“Don’t I know it.” Cashmere stated with a grin, a new song pumping into the air even louder than the last one. “Now, do me a favor; if you’re not gonna try to make any friends at your own going away party, at least try to make some in Ponyville. Eh?”
“Sure I will, sure…” Exie fibbed quickly. She had no intention of doing any such thing, but if the money was good, Exie’d be anypony’s friend. Cashmere scanned Exie’s blue eyes, and for a moment, Exie was afraid that she was going to call her bluff.

Instead, the unicorn sighed and patted her on the shoulder, motioning toward the dancing crowd.
“… Well? What’re you waiting for?”
“I’ve, uh… maybe… I think I should head home for the night.”
Cashmere cocked an eyebrow at her. “What, after all the trouble I went through, you won’t even stay to attend your own party? Your going-away party? That I threw for you?” she said with a grin.
Exie knew exactly what she was doing; oh, the guilt trip was an old one. Then again, it was an old trick because it worked. She pushed the rising guilt away, snickering at the elder unicorn. “I know, I know – but you bought the ticket. See here, where it says seven A.M.? I really ought to get some sleep, if I’m going to be riding a train that early in the morning.”

The gray unicorn laughed, sighing in defeat. “Okay, okay. You win. Can’t say an old mare didn’t try. Get yourself home, young ‘un.”
“... I will, I will,” she lied once more, peering about the room for that cyan earth pony with the sturdy build and nice flank. “I just need to, um… collect a few things before I go.”

Not giving Cashmere time to answer, Exie darted into the crowd, the music pumping louder and louder throughout the darkened room as she drew closer to the center. The white unicorn in the DJ’s booth scratched loudly at a twin set of records, releasing a steady stream of rhythm into the room. There was a sort of elegance to her beats; a small measure of refinement amongst the chaotically pumping sound, giving it a slightly hypnotic feel.

“There’s a room where the lights won’t find you – holding hands while the walls come tum~bling down-“

Exie shook herself out of her trance, searching for that cyan stallion. Oh, if she had her way about it, she wasn’t going to be doing much sleeping tonight at all.

A rustling near the open front window caught her eye even in the dark, and strobe light passing randomly over the room caught flashes of blue and black nearby.
Exie grinned, stalking her prey.

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Ryan wriggled with difficulty through the small window, thankful for once in his life for his lanky frame. The clattering and clanking behind him followed closely, but Ryan gladly spotted the door being kicked open. He’d escaped guard pony, but just barely. The room was dark, aside from the random spots of light flying around here and there. So long as he kept low to the ground and crept along the wall, he suspected that he’d be fine. The dancing and singing ponies didn’t even seem to notice him; hell, very few of them even noticed when the pegasus kicked in the front door, shouting in confusion. Apparently, a couple of the younger guests thought he was some kind of hired exotic dancer, because they were tossing little golden coins at him and whistling profusely.

Guard Pony did not like that very much.

Ryan eyed the golden coins glinting on the ground greedily, and momentarily, he considered making a grab for them. However, it was difficult enough to slip away from Guard Pony in the first place; he didn’t like his odds of squirming through the crowd without drawing attention. He was already having trouble keeping hidden in the dark, as the flashing strobe lights waved over him periodically.

He stealthily crept (as stealthily as any nearly seven foot tall gang junkie can) along the wall, spotting an open doorway and sliding into it, nearly doubled over from his efforts to remain hidden.
Despite the fact that he’d snuck right past the party completely hunched over, in any other circumstance, he would have been caught by Guard Pony by now. However, due to the rather… excitable pair of mares tossing bits and ecstatically screaming ‘Take it off! Whoo!’ at the guard, Ryan was able to quite easily sneak away completely undetected.

Or, so he thought.

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“Yoo~hoo…!” Exie breathed eagerly into the darkened room. “Come on, I know I saw you checking me out...” she trailed off teasingly, slipping into the darkened room in search of her well-built stallion.
The rustle in the dark skidded enticingly away from her, almost silent across the wooden floor. It wasn’t much more than a little storage room, a single patch of dim moonlight filtering in through the latched glass window.

“… Oh, don’t be shy…” Exie whispered, budging the door not-quite closed behind her with her hoof. The pumping music behind her was lessened to a dull roar thanks to the obstruction. Her heart pounded in her chest with anticipation, and she giddily approached the figure in the corner. “Then again… there’s always room for a little… foreplay.”
C’mon, ya fuckin’ – stupid – window! He thought furiously as he dropped his hands quickly from the windowsill, and backed further into the corner. The guard with the spear had freaked out badly enough at his sudden arrival; Ryan could only imagine just what would happen to him if this new pony sounded the alarm. He’d seen enough alien-themed movies to last him a lifetime... or at least, enough to know that they’d probably try to dissect him.

Not the first time somebody’s tried slicin’ me up, he thought grimly as he pushed himself as far into the dark corner as he could go. He couldn’t stoop any lower without crouching, but he made his height as diminished as he could without dropping to his knees. So long as he stayed in the darkened corner, the peach colored pony couldn’t see him very well.

“… Go away.” Ryan rumbled huskily, dropping his voice a couple of decibels.
“Oh, first you’re shy, now you’re playing hard to get?” the amber maned pony asked passionately, lowering her own voice as well.
Ryan peered about the room, desperate for something he could use to hide behind; or, if all else failed, break the damned window. The only other things in the room, however, were a couple of stacked crates in the corner opposite him. Trying to get near them would force him to step into the moonlight, revealing his not-so-pony nature.
Think, idiot! Think!

“You’re, uh… not my type.” Ryan growled, hoping to intimidate the peach colored earth pony into leaving. Instead, she merely drew closer to him, evening sky blue eyes shining brightly in the dark. As a single silk-laden hoof stepped into the tiny patch of light, Ryan could see that she had quite attractive features… for a pony, of course. A soft look adorned her gaze, simultaneously excited and almost hungry. The black bow tightly attached to her head held her deep red mane in check, but a few strands fell down in front of her eyes, almost flowing into her lightly rounded face.

If Ryan had to guess, he’d say that she looked to be barely out of her teens, by pony standards. That look she was giving him – anticipation, curiosity, need…
It was freaking him the hell out.

“Just… just get out,” he hissed frantically, trying to scoot further across the wall without getting any closer. He drew closer and closer to the door, hoping to get away. “I don’t want you near me!”
“Oh, for the love of Celestia,” Exie groaned, hoof hitting her face in exasperation. “I’m not going to hold you down, or anything – I mean, unless… you want me to…”
“Out! Just fuckin’ go!” Ryan seethed, fists clenching in anger.
“All I wanted was to get FUCKED, okay!?”

The door to the room burst open with a loud clatter, slamming against the wall.
“Whoo! Gonna get you some Ecstasy, officer pony?” a teasing voice called out somewhere from the other room. A tingle of fear ran up her spine as Exie realized that somepony had been watching her follow the stallion into the room.
“STOP RIGHT THERE, CRIMINAL SCUM!” Brink Slipper roared as he kicked the door in forcefully. His face was littered with little splotches of lipstick, which trailed down his armor in several… unwanted places. The door missed Ryan’s head by inches, bouncing off the wall next to him. The light from the party spilled in, and although it wasn’t much, it was enough for Exie to catch a sight of the storage room’s other occupant.

It was a monster.
Only in sight for a split second, the hulking beast drew itself to its full height, head brushing against the ceiling. It snatched the guard around the throat with one hand, shoving the door closed with the other. Exie watched in silent horror as the beast grappled with the fighting guard, impossibly long arms wrapped tightly around his neck…
Only to hear a loud, horrible crack! as the pony was dropped to the ground, tongue lolling awkwardly out of his mouth.

Exie gasped in terror, backpedalling from the hulking monstrosity. In the dark, she could make out its too-tall silhouette, long appendages reaching downwards toward the guard.

“… Aw... Fuck.”

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Ryan really hadn’t wanted to kill the guard – he was just some pony, doing his job. He vaguely wondered if he had kids, before pushing that thought out of his head. Killing had never been easy for Ryan.
Of course, that didn’t mean he wasn’t good at it.

The guard’s neck had snapped with hardly any effort at all, and Ryan promptly dropped him. He momentarily reached out to pick up the dead creature to push it out of the way; perhaps hide the body in one of the crates, cover his tracks.
But, of course, he still had a witness to take care of.

“O-oh, by the Titans…!” the peach colored pony breathed in terror and disgust, voice catching in her throat as she struggled to speak, to cry out for help. The fear was paralyzing.

“Come on, Exie; the jigs up…!”
“Leave her be, Tulip; let the girl have some fun, eh?” a pair of voices sounded just outside the door, but the other was persistently arguing with the other, trying to get into the room. Swiftly, Ryan shoved a couple of crates in front of the door to block any entrances, and pushed past Exie to struggle with the latch on the window. With a small, satisfying click! it finally popped open, cool night air flowing in through the window.

What do I do, what do I do…?! she thought frantically. This… monster had just murdered somepony, right in front of her. She grabbed the leg of the monster, trying to keep it from escaping… or leaving her alone with the body.
“W-w-where are you g-going?” she whispered frantically, her heartbeat so loud she could feel it in her eardrums.
“Take a guess, fuck nut.” The beast replied, one leg sticking out the window. “I’m pretty sure none of those guys saw me get in here; and, ‘sides, they definitely know you’re in here.” He said quietly, jabbing a thumb at the body of the guard. “Jus’ whaddya think they’re gonna do when they get in?”
“But-but-but-!” Exie sputtered nervously, eyes flying back and forth between the body, the beast, and the door.
“But-but-but!” the pale monster mocked her cruelly, flapping one of its appendages to make it look like a sock puppet. “You think any o’ those thigh-high lil’ shits are gonna believe you didn’t kill that guy?”

For a long moment, Exie was silent, watching the towering monstrosity as she released him. He was right; she could try to call for help, but by the time anypony got in, the fiend would probably be long gone, and she doubted that she could restrain him. He’d just killed a guard effortlessly in front of her. She had no physical evidence that it wasn't her - and besides, who would really believe her if she claimed that a monster had just been there a few moments ago? If she wasn't locked away in a prison, she'd be locked away in an asylum. Damned if she did, damned if she didn't.
Ryan’s shark-like grin spread over his face at her obvious despair, and he crept quietly out the window.
“Well, kid, you wanted ta’ get fucked. Now, you’re really fucked.”

And with a mad cackle, he sped off into the night.

With the door budging repeatedly against the crates and the voices of multiple ponies pushing against it, Exie made her decision. In her eyes, though, it really wasn’t a decision at all. People and ponies share a common ground – they both tend to go a little crazy when under pressure. To Exie, it was a perfectly rational choice.
To Exie, the only thing that mattered now was self-perseverance.
To Exie, there were no more options.

So, she did the only thing she could do as she watched the mad beast lumber away down the streets of Canterlot. Something she knew, deep down, that she would come to regret.

She followed.

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Author's Note

A special thanks to all the great readers out there.

I'd never have picked up a pen again if it weren't for you guys.