"This is so exciting!" Twilight clapped her hooves as she stood next to princess Celestia. "I've never done a summon like this before!"

"Must we really do this?" Princess Luna seemed unsure of what to think of this situation. "I already told you I am fine without one."

Celestia gave her sister a smile. "Was it not you that said only yesterday that we should always hold on to old traditions?" Luna slumped. "Besides, you rejected all animals that Fluttershy had to offer. So, yes. In order to find a creature who is your soul mate, we must do this."

"You could always take the hamster," Twilight Sparkle suggested. "It really seemed to like you."

"And what would the princess of the night do with a minion like that?" Luna snapped back. "I have no interest in cute and cuddly things to portray myself. I demand a minion that befits my royal status. A strong and reliable fighter! A wild and yet noble being! A-"

"A minion that matches its master's noble ancestry. Yes, yes..." Celestia sighed. "That is the reason why we are here. This summon is specifically designed to find you a minion ideally suited for your needs."

Luna huffed. "Then let us get on with it. I have duties to attend to."

Celestia gave a short nod. "Very well, take your positions." Both Luna and Twilight went to their respective corners of the summoning circle. "Now," Celestia let out a long breath to clear her mind. "Let us begin."

Outside the room with the three princesses, two members of Celestia's royal guard stood on duty. They had clear orders not to let anyone pass, lest the ritual would be disturbed. It also meant that they had to remain perfectly still at all times, as not to disturb the magical flux in the vicinity.

Two minutes after the ritual had actually started, the two were finding the latter task increasingly difficult. ...Mainly due to the fact that they could actually feel the Alicorns even through closed doors. The amount of magic released by the three was incredible, and it shook the very ground under their feet.

"Are they trying to blow up the castle again?" the first guard whispered to his companion as they tried to remain still.

"First, that was Princess Sparkle alone. Second, she tried to make it float not blow it up," the other guard turned its head slightly as it whispered. "And third, shut up or they'll really blow up the castle this time."

"If they blow up the castle I'm resigning," the first guard mumbled to himself.

There was a loud poof from inside the chamber, and the two guards looked down in surprise to see a carpet of thick smoke make its way through the gap under the door. Inside the chamber, they could hear the three princesses cough.

"What happened, princess?" Twilight could be heard calling. "Did it work?"

"I think it did," Celestia managed to croak. "What is this smoke? It smells terrible!"

"Well, where is it?" Luna sounded slightly irritated between her own coughs. "I can't see a... what in the name of Equestria is that?!"

At this point, a fourth voice came to life. ...And the very sound of it was enough to startle the guards outside. What it said though, served to totally confuse them. Even more so because it was screaming loud enough to make the doors vibrate.

"I HAVE THE SHINIEST MEAT BICYCLE!"

There was a yelp and a shout, then more screams and the sound of tables being overthrown. Snapping out of their surprise, the two guards quickly grabbed the handles of the doors and pulled them open.

At first, only smoke could be seen as the sounds of rampage and yelps continued. Then, something shot out of the smoke and towards the two guards. ...And both their mouths fell open.

It was Princess Luna, screaming and shouting furiously as she ran at full speed. And on top of Luna, bouncing up and down upon her back while laughing maniacally and wildly swinging around something that looked terribly familiar to an axe sat... they had never seen anything like it. It seemed to wear some sort of clothes on its lower legs and there was some sort of strange mask on its head, a single, blood-shot eye could be seen looking around wildly.

"JUST ADD TWO SPOONS OF WATER!" the creature shouted with insane delight as it swung the axe above its head. The two guards didn't even move as Princess Luna shot past the two of them, too enthralled by the psychotic creature straddled upon her back.

As Luna shot down the corridor and out of sight the sounds of the mad laughter quickly died down, just in time as both Princess Celestia and Twilight Sparkle found their way out of the smoke and into the open.

"What happened?" Twilight looked down the corridor with panic. "What was that voice? And where is Princess Luna?"

Celestia frowned. "I am certain that the spell was not corrupted. ...But we had better go and find out just who or what we invited to our world."

What is this place? Why are there ponies here? I told you not to smash that button! Nothing good ever came from Hyperion!

A good way down another corridor, Luna was still screaming as the terrifying one-eyed creature rode upon her, bouncing up and down with each of her panicked steps, laughing like an idiot all the... laughing like an idiot?

"Enough of this foolishness!" she came to a sudden halt, the creature on her back flying off and landing on the floor several feet in front of her with a loud thud.

Did that pony just talk? I don't think we're on Pandora anymore...

The creature stood up, fixating Princess Luna with a twitching eye. "I WANT TO RIDE THE PONY!"

Listen, I don't think...

"You what?!" Luna seemed shocked by his statement. "How dare you treat me like this! I am Princess Luna of Equestria!"

Great, royalty... say that you're sorry and introduce yourself! Do it now, Krieg!

Krieg's head twitched from side to side for a moment, then he held up his buzz axe. "I DESECRATE THE BLOOD-STAINED TOILET SEATS!"

Still not listening to me, huh? Great...

Krieg pointed a finger at Luna. "RIDE THE MEAT BICYCLE!"

Luna scowled at him. "No!" she reached out with her magic, but found herself unable to hold him. "What devilry is this?!" she snarled at the confused-looking Krieg. "Why is my magic not working?!"

Did she just say magic?

Krieg beat his buzz axe against one of the walls. "FLY ME TO THE BASTION OF RUSTY NIPPLES!"

Luna took a careful step back as she glared at him. "Mind your language, you ugly beast!"

The moment Luna had said the word ugly, Krieg seemed to freeze and even his constant twitching stopped. Luna saw his eye narrow.

Oh boy...

Princess Celestia and Twilight Sparkle had been searching for several minutes when Princess Luna suddenly shot around a corner with a frantic look on her face as she galloped towards them at full speed.

"HELP ME!"

"LET ME STIR UP YOUR SALAD!" Krieg shot around the same corner, waving his axe around himself wildly and striking down any furniture in his way.

"STOP CHASING ME!"

Stop chasing her you lunatic!

"STOP SCREAMING AT ME!" Krieg sobbed as he chased after her.

More of them up ahead! Make a right!

"I AM THE CONDUCTOR OF THE POOP TRAIN!"

Krieg shot to the left and jumped through a window at full speed, continuing to laugh even as he landed in the courtyard below.

Close enough...

Author's Note

Sorry for all the caps... IT'S JUST THAT IT PURVEYS THE COMPLEXITY OF KRIEG'S PERSONALITY A LOT BETTER!!!
Again... sorry for the caps. So sorry.