Inhuman

Chapter 4: Secrets and Lies

Twilight had been levitating a bite of pancake to her mouth when Zachary had pulled his latest... stunt.

Needless to say, the bite didn't find its way into her mouth and the fork clattered onto the table as her magic failed her, and she stared at the spectacle in disbelief, her mouth literally wide open.

The human she had invited into her home looked like he was about to sit down at the breakfast table.  That seemed perfectly normal; she expected him to eat breakfast like any other pony would.

Except, at the last second, he had turned away from the breakfast table and stuck his head directly into the garbage can near the sink.

Twilight and Spike stared at the human with their mouths open as he ate.  The human pointedly decided to ignore them and continued to enjoy his meal.

He was eating the garbage with a supreme amount of gusto, as well.

"Uh.... Zach?" Twilight squeaked out.  Honestly, this whole situation just felt a little bit awkward.  Spike was already backing away from the human.

Zachary withdrew his head from the garbage bin at a frightening speed, and then turned to look at her.  Slop was dribbling down his chin, and he looked at her with a much more wild quality.

One thing that struck Twilight were his eyes.  They had changed.  Before, she had noted that the human's eyes were more of an almond-shape, and somewhat small.  Now, however, they were just noticeably bigger, but they were rounder than before.  And the sclera.... the sclera had turned black and had overtaken the iris of his eyes, meaning that they were pitch black.  It was like staring into an abyss.

"Z-Zach..."

Twilight didn't admit it, but she felt a slight twinge of fear at seeing the human.  Those pitch black eyes seemed soulless and evil.  Her flank hit the wall as she backed up, her ears drooping.  Spike was even more wary than her; he had already bolted from the room.

A few very awkward seconds passed, before Zachary seemed to snap out of... whatever had taken hold of him.  Twilight's ears drooped even further as he shook his head frantically and pushed the garbage can away.  She turned away, and when she looked at him again, his eyes were back to what they were before.

She noticed a slight look of fear pass over his face, and he shook his head while appearing to shudder slightly.  The whole scene was becoming more confusing by the second.

"W-What w-was that?" Twilight asked, working up the courage to speak again.  Zachary grimaced, and she could tell already that there was something bothering him.

A look of sadness passed across his face that Twilight also picked up on, but it was gone before she knew it.  It was replaced by a light smirk, followed by a much wider grin.

"I'm sorry, Twilight.  I didn't mean to be so rude to my esteemed host.  You were just introduced to humans yesterday, so you wouldn't about certain... biological features that we possess.  What you just saw was one of them."

Twilight's heart seemed to calm down at that;  the weird and scary sight fading from her memory.  If it could be explained to her using science, then there was no reason for her to be afraid.

"B-Biological features?" she asked, curious.

"Yes.  Once again, I'm sorry for that.  We humans have a few instinctual tendencies, one of which is in regards to food.  I'll keep in mind that I shouldn't eat out of garbage cans, but there was something in that trash can that stimulate one of these biological tendencies.  I take it you eat a lot of fruit?"

Twilight shook her head.

"That's something that can induce such a thing.  Well, I called it an instinctual tendency, but it's probably more accurately called a craving.  Fruit is a very essential part of a human's diet, and our human bodies are biologically wired to crave it.  Fruits with a high level of sugar can cause EXTREMELY strong cravings, which is basically what you saw..."

"Usually, we don't lose control so much that we begin to eat out of garbage cans, but there may be something about your food or some new foods in Equestria that I've never seen before which may have caused that...  Now that I know, I'll probably be able to help myself a little more..."

Twilight seemed to relax more.

"And those eyes... were they a part of that too?"

"The eyes... did they turn pitch-black?  Yeah, that probably also has something to do with it.  Well, at least everyone I know has that happen when the cravings take hold.  I don't know how it works or anything; I'm no scientist."

Twilight narrowed her eyes, and Zach knew that she was filing that information away for later.  She had calmed down, but she seemed a little bit more wary around him.

"Hmm, I'll have to ask you about that later, but right now that seems like a very strange, but ultimately harmless phenomenon.  However, I would appreciate if from now on if you told me in advance if things like this were going to occur.  I'd like to avoid having a heart attack.  But now that I think about it, this change in behavior is so fascinating!  You'll have to tell me more later!"  Twilight remarked.

"Ooh, I'm getting so excited.  I want to study more!" she clapped her hooves together as she spoke.  This was the opportunity of a lifetime.  She could actually right a book on this human if they happened to be an undiscovered species!  Her name could potentially be heard throughout all of academia!

Zach raised an eyebrow at her.

"Stupid!  Stupid!  How could I be so stupid?!"

He had dodged a bullet on that one, truly.  He was supposed to act normally as he blended into Ponyville, and was not to exhibit any odd behavior that may make him seem suspicious.

Fortunately, he seemed to have retained Twilight's trust for a couple of reasons.

One, ponies in general seemed to lack of basic understanding of what humans were like.  With that in mind, he could lie through his teeth and try to pass this up as normal human behavior, which is exactly what he did.

Secondly, ponies in general seemed to be a fairly trusting folk, perhaps to a fault.  Perhaps it was their herd mentality, but he didn't know.

Still, he shouldn't have allowed himself to succumb to his biological needs.  He had hoped he could eat some meat here, but that was now clearly out of the question.  He was smart enough to say that it was fruit that generated the cravings, but if he hadn't thought it through enough and said it was meat that sent him into an uncontrollable craving, he doubted that would go over well with the vegetarian ponies.  Twilight could also put two-and-two together if he told her about a human's diet, and she could probably deduce that humans might be capable of going on an uncontrollable craving for meat, even if what he told her was all bullshit.

He eyed the purple pony in front of him, who had sat back down at the breakfast table.

"Damn, I better not let this bit of information slip.  If I told Lambda I almost blew my cover, she'd probably kill me.  And Shadow Star probably wouldn't be very happy either..."

"No more slip-ups.  I gotta transition this well.  Get back on track with acting like a normal human, and there shouldn't be anymore problems."

Zachary sat down at the breakfast table, and an awkward silence overcame the two of them.  Spike of course wasn't in the room any longer, and Zach got the feeling that the baby dragon would be far more wary of him from now on, much more than Twilight.

"I'm sorry about that little incident, but now that we have everything cleared up, I'll keep that kind of behavior under control..."

Twilight took a sip from her mug as she began to eat again.  Zachary didn't know what she was drinking; it didn't look like coffee.

"Oh, it's no bother!" she said hastily.  "Nopony got hurt or anything, and I should have expected new and alien behaviors from a race that I've never heard of!"

Zachary breathed out.

"Well, I'm glad that we've got that out of the way.  There's something I'd like to ask.  I have a family and friends back home... and I think it's pretty obvious that I don't want to spend the rest of my life here.  I mean, you've been very nice, providing me with a roof and shelter and all, but I'd actually prefer to get back as soon as possible..."

Twilight smirked at him.

"I was wondering when you would start feeling a little homesick.  You went all last night without even asking how to get home.  Don't worry; things might already be covered, but..."  she said, and a frown spread across her face.

"I'm still having trouble buying that whole "from another universe" thing.  Part of the reason I sent that letter to Princess Celestia was about getting you home.  If it turns out you are from some part of Equus that I don't know about, then it would be fairly easy to send you back.  However, if your crazy theory happens to be true... then we may have a problem on our hooves,"  she finished, staring seriously at Zachary.

"At that point, we'd be delving into aspects that are still nowhere near understood well enough by modern Equestrian society.  I could look through all my books on magic, but there won't be a spell on how to even know if there are multiple universes, let alone a spell that can transport somepony from one to another!"

"Unfortunately, based on your bizarre appearance, I can't rule out this possibility.  However, when the Princess writes back hopefully both of us will have a great deal of clarity on what to do next."

Zachary slumped slightly, and his face took on a melancholy expression.  Twilight sensed this, and reached over and Zachary stared as she placed a purple hoof on his shoulder.

"Hey, don't worry about a thing.  The Princess has ruled Equestria for over a thousand years.  I'm sure she'll have a solution to your problem," she reassured, her face turning into a smile.

"A-A thousand years?!  Ponies live that long!?" Zachary said, a tinge of shock in his voice.  Twilight just continued to smile at him.

"Well, not really.  The Princesses are the most powerful ponies in all of Equestria, and they're much much longer lived than the rest of us.  Nopony else lives anywhere near as long as a thousand years..."

"I see."

"But because of that, there usually isn't anything that Princess Celestia doesn't know!  We just have to wait for her response.  In the meantime..." she trailed off, levitating out a checklist.

"I have a checklist of things to do in the meantime, so right now at least you're welcome in Ponyville!  Hopefully you'll be back on your way home soon, but for right now you might just want to enjoy it here, kinda like a vacation!" she encouraged, pouring over her checklist.

Zachary seemed depressed, but before long he managed to cheer himself up.

"You know what, you're right.  What's the point of me sitting around here and worrying all day?  I'll just have to make the most of this situation." he said, more to himself than Twilight.

"Well, there were a few things I had scheduled to do today, but your arrival threw this schedule for a loop.  I'll have to push some of these things to the side..." she said, somewhat frantically.

She groaned.

"Ugh, there's no time!  There are so many more questions I need to ask you, and I need to do some things out in Ponyville, but I don't have enough time to fit all that in today!  What to do?!" she cried.

Zachary just looked on, as if he were looking for an exit to get away from the obsessive purple pony.

He placed a hand on her withers, and she flinched.

"Look, Twilight.  Don't worry.  We'll find the time to do all of those things, and I'll be happy to answer any questions you might have.  For now, why don't you just take me along while you go do your thing out in Ponyville?"

Twilight rolled up her checklist and went into deep thought.  She then smiled.

"You're right.  Here I am telling you not to worry about something of great importance, and then you have to reassure me over something as silly as a checklist!  You're right, I'll just take you out into Ponyville with me!  It's the perfect opportunity for you to get adjusted to this place."

Twilight finished the last few bites of her breakfast, and levitated the dishes into the sink for Spike to take care of later.  She cantered into the main room of the library, and when Zachary poked his head out into the foyer, she was putting on her saddlebags.

He cringed.

"Now that I think about it, the only ponies I've actually seen are you, Pinkie, and that rainbow one that was with you in the forest.  Walking directly into an entire town full of them might be a little overwhelming..." he said, a tinge of nervousness in his voice.

Twilight waved it off.

"You probably won't have to worry about that.  These townsponies may be a little crazy and skiddish, but nothing should happen.  They might avoid you at first, but be out there long enough and they should warm up to you, and then you'll find that they're actually quite friendly!"

A look of annoyance passed over Twilight's face.

"Spike, what are you doing?" she deadpanned.  The little dragon had huddled himself in the corner, looking at Zachary with a tinge of fear.

"You're going out there... with him?" he asked.

Zachary thought he was already scared, but that look devolved into an expression of abject terror when Twiight levelled him with a fierce glare.

"Spike... is there anything wrong with our guest here?" she asked in dangerously low voice, almost daring him to talk back to her.

"W-Well, y-you saw w-what h-happened in the k-kitchen..."  he squeaked, the poor baby dragon trying to look smaller against the bookshelves.  Twilight sighed.

"Spike, we've already cleared that up.  There was nothing dangerous about it.  It's just a particular custom that we in Equestria are not familiar with.  Nothing more..." she recited, trying to draw Spike out of the corner.

"Now Zach and I are going to out to Ponyville.  Make sure you finish the dishes while we're gone, and don't make a mess!" she called out to him, already out the door, apparently not waiting for him.

Zachary shook his head.  This girl was unbelievable sometimes.

"Everyone's staring at me..."

"Just ignore it.  It'll go away..."

"But I can feel it.  They all think I'm weird..."

"That's because you are weird.  These ponies have never seen anything like you before..."

"Maybe I should just go back..."

"Hey, this was your idea.  I'm not gonna let you back out now!"

The duo of pony and human walking down the street like nothing drew a lot of odd stares from the local residents of Ponyville.  Most of the time they were just content to stare, but a few others would also whisper in hushed voices to their friends, and it most likely wasn't anything good.

"Well, I think we can put off getting more quills for now, but the first thing we should do is visit the Mayor's office.  She's bound to have had a hectic time since last night over the explosion, and she doesn't know about you yet, so we need to clear up that..."

"Whatever you say.  I'm down for anything..."

As the two of them walked, ponies continued to whisper.  Twilight could tell Zachary was getting bothered by it, so to take his mind off it, she started asking various questions that she had been meaning to ask.

They talked for a few minutes, and Zach seemed to be lightening up in face of all the pressure from the townsponies.  She asked him various questions about how human society worked, and frankly she found most of it unbelievable.

She learned of a species seven billion strong that had built hundreds of cities spanning across the globe.  She learned about the various ways that humans were able to get by without magic, through the use of their really advanced technology.  They almost talked a bit about the more... unsavory aspects of humanity, but they arrived at City Hall before Zachary could actually talk about that.

".... Okay, this is all pretty incredible.  I almost don't believe it, because I'm pretty sure you'd have to be from another world in order to accomplish this... Oh!  Look!  We're here!" Twilight remarked, as Zachary had just finished talking about a small flat box called an iPhone, which could do so many things that it made Twilight's head spin.

When he heard her words, he turned to look up at the building.  It was fairly large, and had the same architectural style as the rest of Ponyville.  Still, beyond this door would be peop- ponies of authority.

"Uh, Twilight... could you go on ahead by yourself.  I don't feel comfortable stepping into his building," he admitted.  Twilight gave him an odd look.

"If you say so.  I was just going to go in and clear up any confusion that might be had.  It shouldn't take longer than five minutes," she said, her eyes narrowing slightly.  Zachary waved her off.

"Yeah, yeah, go ahead.  I'll just wait out here..." he said, a little too quickly.  Twilight stared at him for a couple seconds longer, before disappearing into city hall.

Zach stood outside while Twilight took care of her business.  Ponies passed every few seconds, giving him weird looks.  He spaced out, staring at a group of three fillies who were looking his way with a look of excitement in their eyes.  His heart plummeted, and he suddenly got the feeling that he needed to run away before a disaster happened.

"Hey!"

"Crack rock?" Zachary mumbled, jumping out of his stupor when he heard a voice, calling out to him apparently.  He looked around, his head tilting upward.

He felt something long and winding wrap itself around his midsection, and wheezed for breath as it tightened.  His hands were bound tightly, but he tried as he might to undo the bindings on him.

"A lasso?" he thought, wincing at the tightness of the rope.

"YEEEEEEE-HAW!  Ah got ya, ya varmint!"

The rope pulled suddenly, and Zach found himself flopping onto the ground, being dragged along.  He got a brief reprieve when the lasso released itself, but before he even knew it he was bound again.  This time it was his legs that were tied up.

He tried to splutter something out, but it just came out as an angry mutter.

"Quit strugglin'.  It won't do yah any good..."

Zach rolled his eyes.  Looking sideways, he could see four orange hooves standing on the ground before him.  His eyes panned upwards.  He took in the appearance of an orange earth pony mare with a blonde mane and a stetson hat perched directly on her head.  She seemed angry with him for some reason.

"Now what in the hay is a creature like y'all doin' in Ponyville?  Ah know that somethin' like you shouldn't leave the Everfree Forest an' come here causin' a ruckus and rustlin' up the townponies!" the orange pony said, in a thick Southern accent.

Zachary sighed.

"A ruckus?  What part of me sitting there doing nothing is causing a ruckus?  It's not my fault that you ponies are so skittish!"

The human looked around, several ponies had gathered in a circle around him.  They were casting him wary looks.  If he had to guess, they saw the orange country pony lasso him up, so they assumed that he must've done something wrong, or gone on a rampage.

"Applejack?!  What are you doing?!"

Zach recognized Twilight's voice, and he could see her push through the wall of ponies that were gathered around him.

"Hey Twilight!" Applejack called out.  "Just helpin' round up this here critter who was botherin' the townsponies." she said, no small amount of pride in her voice.  She didn't seem to notice that Twilight looked furious.

"APPLEJACK?!  You release him this instant!  Do you just go around lassoing everything you see!"  Twilight shouted at her friend.  The farm pony at least had the decency to look intimidated in front of the irate unicorn, as did everypony else.

"Bu.... But- the townsponies were afraid a' him..." Applejack said lamely, the rope coming undone and allowing Zachary some freedom.

"Of course they were, Applejack!  The townsponies here are afraid of everything that's even slightly different here!  That doesn't mean you can go lose your head the first chance you get!  Didn't you learn anything from Zecora?!" she lectured, and Zachary was actually stunned at how intimidating Twilight could actually get.

Applejack's ears flattened against her head.

"He can talk, by the way!  He's not just some creature from the Everfree Forest.  He's as smart as you and I.  Now I want you to apologize to him!" Twilight continued, laying it into Applejack.

Applejack gave Twilight a look of offense, before she grudgingly trotted up to Zachary.

"Uh... hey there pardner.  Ah'm awfully sorry about thinkin' you were some no-good varmint from the Everfree Forest here to stir up trouble.  An' ah'm sorry about goin' off without thinkin'.  Y'all really weren't causin' a ruckus after all, were ya?" she said awkwardly, a slight blush on her orange face.

"That's better, Applejack," Twilight sighed.  "And I'm sorry I had to go off on you like that, but you must understand that Zach is a complete stranger to Equestria  We have little information about what he is or where he came from.  All we know is that he appeared in White Tail Woods last night.."

"Wait, that huge explosion that happened las' night?  That was you?" Applejack asked, eying the human.  Twilight clapped her hooves together.

"I was going to tell you later today when we saw you, but I took Zach here in for the night when we found him lost in White Tail Woods.  That explosion apparently did have something to do with him, but he isn't sure how he got here in the first place.  Because of that, I thought it would be hospitable if we were welcomed here in Ponyville while we sort out his circumstances, but I can see that that isn't going to happen..."  At this point, she wasn't just talking to Applejack, but the entire crowd ponies.

"Well, I think he can feel super welcomed in Ponyville!"

Twilight snorted as a blast of confetti went off, covering her, Zach, and Applejack in the papery substance.

"Pinkie Pie, where did you come from?"

The three of them heard a faint, high-pitched giggle, and they were all surprised when the pink earth pony appeared right in the middle of them, drawing her forelegs out to... abnormally long lengths and grabbing them all in a huddle.

"From Sugarcube Corner, silly!" she said, answering Twilight's question.

"But that's not important right now!  What is important right is that I remember I am a super forgetful pants and... wait, am I super forgetful if I remember that I'm forgetful right now!?  Oops, silly me, I forgot again!  Oh well!  I'm here to tell you all that I forgot I needed to throw a "Welcome to Ponyville" party for our special not-pony pony!  And you all need to be there!" she said, producing invitations from nowhere and handing them to anyone in sight.

Zach poured over his; it was so strange.  This pink pony didn't even know his name and here she was throwing him a party.  Well, at least the invitation looked solid.  She spelled "human" like "hyoo-men" but other than that it was okay.  Apparently, it was at Sugarcube Corner, and it was tonight.

He would go, but he hoped it didn't last into the wee hours of the night.  He had other... business that he had to take care of afterwards.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

Today, something very interesting happened.  I'm afraid I don't have a friendship report this time, but there is something I would like seek your guidance on.  You see, tonight there was a large explosion coming from White Tail Woods, but more importantly I made a very interesting discovery.  A creature I have never encountered before.  He calls himself a human, and as you might have guessed, he has the ability to talk.  I've never seen anything remotely resembling him before, except maybe a monkey.  He is almost completely hairless, walks and two legs, and is much taller than a normal pony.  The strange thing is that he's claiming he's from another universe, or dimension if you will, but both of us have no idea how he got here!  He also seems to lack a common level of knowledge on basic subjects such as magic and ponies themselves!  I have no idea how to handle this situation, and I would be incredibly enthused if you would happen to know what a "human" is or how I might handle this situation.

Your Faithful Student,

Twilight Sparkle."

"This is.... very disconcerting, sister."

This time, it was Celestia's turn to wake up her sister, but it was for reasons much different than before.  This time, Celestia was concerned over the safety of her most faithful student.

"I think it is fairly obvious that you have put two-and-two together, Luna." Celestia remarked.  Celestia rolled up the scroll which both of them had read, and Celestia couldn't keep the worry out of her voice.

Celestia paced back and forth in her throne room, while Luna looked on with curiosity.

"This may just be too big of a coincidence.  Twilight Sparkle is the most magically gifted unicorn that I know, and this comes at a time when..."

"There have been five disappearances in the last month of exceptionally gifted unicorns..." Luna finished her sentence for her, a feeling of unease washing over the area.

Celestia shook her head.

"I can't help but feel that these two events are linked in some way.  I felt the tremor from White Tail Wood last night, but I can't..."

"One thing that is bothering me, sister, is the appearance of the creature that Twilight Sparkle described.  Two legs, tall, and she described it as monkey-like.  I know that we have no definite proof of the Hooded Gorilla yet, but I'm getting a bad feeling that this creature is at least in some way related to the rumored beast."

"I get that feeling too Luna.  It is purely too much of a coincidence for an unknown creature that Equestrian society has never heard of to just fall on the doorstep of the most magically talented unicorn in Equestria, while simultaneously there are disappearances of magically talented unicorns all over Equestria."

Celestia continued to pace, while sighing heavily.

"What do we do then, sister?" asked Luna.

Celestia mulled over the question.

"Twilight seems to have taken this creature under her wing.  Although it is very suspicious, we have no proof of anything treacherous occurring in Ponyville.  We do not even know what the creature looks like, let alone its intentions.  We cannot act rashly in a moment such as this.  There's still the possibility that it is just a lost and confused creature that is trying to find its way home..."

That didn't seem to cut it for Luna.

"So you're just going to do nothing?!  Simply allow that beast to kidnap poor Twilight Sparkle, just like the rest of them?!" she cried in the Royal Canterlot Voice.

Celestia gave her a stern look.

"That is NOT my intention by any means, Luna.  This creature is very suspicious, yes, but Twilight Sparkle is the most magically gifted unicorn for a reason.  What I plan to do with this suspicious creature is have Twilight Sparkle and it called up to Canterlot.  We will assess it with our own eyes, and see if it is any threat whatsoever.  If it is, we shall take action immediately!" she bellowed.  Luna's look soured.

"Very well, sister.  But keep in mind that every moment you leave Twilight with that thing, she may very well be in danger.  I would advise you to make haste to delivering Twilight Sparkle up to Canterlot," Luna huffed.

"I understand, little sister.  I will make the arrangements for passage up to Canterlot immediately..."