The Z Team

                                                            Equestria: Ponyville, Twilight's hosue

              The sunlight came throught the window and made its way to Twilights bed.

            *Yawn* "Man, that dream I had last night about a snake crushing me felt sooooo..." Merlin was cut off when Twilight who had fallen asleep on the other side of the bed was now giving Merlin a death hug. "R-rea-real."

           Merlin didn't want to wake her so he began to pry her off him. When he couldn't get her to move her forelegs any more he slid out out of her grip.

            "Man that pony can hug and I mean HUG!" Merlin said to himself as he put his gear on. "Alright then let's see what there is to do." Merlin looked around the room and the his eyes fell on Twilight who was now feeling around on the bed where Merlin was laying earlier. "Awww man ummmmm..." Merlin looked around to put in Twilight's hug then he saw Spike sleeping in a what I think is some kind of basket.

             Merlin then got a devilish smile on his face as he walked over to the baby dragon and picked him up. "What...huh? Hey who are you put me...*GASP*" Was all Spike could say before he was being killed by Twilight's iron grip hug.

               *Knock knock knock*

           "Oh come on not this bullshit again." Merlin said as he walked down stairs to the door. "Here we go again." He said pulling out one handgun. Then in less than a second Merlin flung the door open and aimed the handgun between the eyes of...of...a royal guard "Oh hey, nice to meet you my names Merlin." Merlin said doing his best scout from tf2 impression. "So, can we talk instead of blowing your brains out?" The second after Merlin made the threat more guards pointed there spears at Merlin.

           "S-s-sorry to bother y-you sir it's j-just that we wanted to a-ask you some question." The royal guard said terrified Merlin may use his weapon only knowing it will blow his brains out.

           "Alrighty then, lay it on me." Merlin said spinning the handgun on his finger a couple of times before putting it up.

          "Uuummmmm...ok? Well we found a body of what I guess is your species in the trash to this house and we where wondering if you knew anything about it?" The guard asked the former zombie hunter.

          "Ok but first how did you find him?" Merlin asked.

          "Well there was a really bad smell so somepony went over to see what it was then opened the trashcan up and found the body." The guard expained.

          "Yeah, now that shit makes as much sence as aliens." Merlin said putting on sunglasses so the sun wouldn't get in his eyes.

          "Wellllllll you are sort of an alien to us you know." The guard said trying not to afend Merlin.

         "Well thats rude because I never thought of you guys as aliens but if thats what your gonna call me then I'm gonna do it back." Merlin said

         "Ok fine I don't really care so any ways, do you know anything about the body?" The guard asked yet again.

         "Yeah I know about it, I smashed his head in the door way right where your standing." Merlin said like it was nothing.

          "Then your under arest for murder." The guard said as all the guards yet again pointed their spears at him.

           "Nope, you can do that. Princess Celestia put me incharge of protecting the pony that lives here and that means I have the right to mangle whoever looks at her funny." Merlin said to the guards.

         "Just shut up and come with us you have no way of prooving it." One of the guard in the back said.

         Just as Merlin's hands met his shotguns Twilight come down stairs with messy bed hair. "Good morning Merlin did you sleep well?" Twilight asked not noticing the deathmatch that is about to occur.

          "Yeah, and I guess you didn't because I woke up with you hugging the crap out of me." Merlin called over his shoulder not taking his eyes off the guards.

          "Is that so? Because for some strange reason I woke up hugging spike." Twilight said

           Merlin began to snigger wondering why she hadn't noticed that there was five royal guards at her door who were going to spear him. "Well I didn't just want to leave you without someone to cuddle with."

           "Like you didn't enjoy it." The little alicorn teased him.

           Merlin was really wanting to know what she was doing behind him but he knew if he took his eyes off the guards they would try to attack him. "Twilight I want to ask you something."

           "What?" Twilight said still not taking notice of the royal dickheads.

           "Can you see what I'm doing?" He asked

        "What are you do...*GASP*" Twilight said as she saw the guards who were beginning to put their spears close to Merlin's stomach. "What in the wide wide world of Equestria are you all doing!?" She yelled at the royal dickheads.

          "This creature has murdered some..." The guard was cut off by Twilight.

          "CREATURE?! CREATURE?! This "creature" is my friend and he didn't murder anyone!!! He saved my life last night and if you ever! EVER!!! Point a spear at him again I will have you FIRED!!!" Twilight screamed in the guards faces surprising Merlin, the guards, and even me the one thats writing this story.

        After Twilight screamed at the guards the where so scared they all dropped their spears and ran for it.

       "W-wow Twilight I didn't think you cared that much about me." Merlin teased Twilight for her outburst.

        Twilight then shut the door slowly. "So should we make breaky or..." Merlin was cut off when Twilight turned around, got up on her hind legs, and hugged him. "Ok...I guess we're just going to hug." Merlin began to return the hug when Twilight wispered in his ear.

              "Don't get any ideas. This is just to thank you for saving last night." Twilight said

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          "So in your world the sun and moon don't set and rise?" Twilight asked

         "Nope, Earth orbits around the sun and the moon orbits Earth making it seem as if the sun and moon rise and set." Merlin said to Twilight as the two walked to sugar cube corner were their friends were waiting for them.

          "Are you sure that there isn't a god or goddess that does it?" Twilight asked for the third time that day.

          "Yes I'm sure Twilight my kind has been to space and we even put the American flag on the moon." Merlin expained hoping she wouldn't ask that question again.

            "Are you absoulutely positively sure?" Twilight asked again.

           "Yes, yes I'm sure!" Merlin said a little loud.

           Just then they arrived at surgar cube corner.

         "Hey Braden, what are you doing here?" Merlin asked his older cousin.

          "I'm watching nyan cat clear the sky." He said as Rainbow Dash bucked one final cloud.

          "So what are you two doing here?" Braden asked as Dashie landed next to him.

         "We're here to get some breakfast or breaky as Merlin puts it." Twilight said as she and Merlin sat down at a table.

          Dawson then came out of sugar cube corner with a plate of cupcakes and sets it down at Braden and Dashies table.

"Here is what you ordered you two." Dawson said to them. "That will be 10 bits."

         "Bits? Really? You ponies still use bits?" Merlin asked Twilight who was waiting to order their food.

          "Yes, do humans not use them any more?" Twilight asked.

           "No, no we don't." Merlin said as Dawson come over to take their order "Heeeeyyyyyy, Dawsy what up man."

          "Nothing much, just helping pinkie out since Mr. and Mrs. Cake are on vacation." Dawson answered."Now what can I get you all?"

           "I'll have a large blue berry muffin and...what do you want Merlin?" Twilight asked.

            "Do you any kind of beer?" Merlin asked since he hadn't had a drink in awhile.

            "Merlin!" Twilight said "You shouldn't talk about that sort of thing while fillies are around." Just as Twilight finished talking Merlin turned to his right to see a mom and her filly walking away while the mom glared at him.

           "No sorry man." Dawson answered.

           "Wait wait wait I almost forgot." Merlin said reaching inside his jacket. "That guy that attacked use last night had wine on him. So who wants a drink?" Merlin said causing more mothers to take their young else where.

          "I'll have some." said Braden while Twilight and Rainbow Dash shook their heads no.

          "Wait, some guy attacked you last night?" asked Dawson

         "Yeah, and from what his shirt said I think I know who we're up against." Merlin said while everone and pony leaned in to hear. "The haters."

          "So we're fighting abunch of college student assholes that hate the ponies and jerk off 7 hours a day?" Braden asked.

          "Well, yeah." Merlin said.

         "HA HA HA, this is going to be easy." Dawson said.

         "Yeah, really easy." Merlin said as pinkie pie came outside with their order and two glasses.

          "Here you all go. One blue berry muffin for Twilight and two glasses for Merlin and Braden." Pinkie said.

         "Wait how did you...?" Braden began to ask but was cut off by Dawson.

        "She's been doing it all day I don't know how but she has." He said.

         Merlin filled the two glasses up and handed one two Braden. "I don't care but I know for sure this is going to be the best job we've done yet." After Merlin finished talking both him and Braden downed their wine.

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            "Finally we're home." Twilight said. "I can't believe you did that!"

            "Hey! Those guys had it coming! I mean were trying to kill you." Merlin said to Twilight.

           "Yeah but you ripped  one of their friends spine out through their stomach and then you beat the rest of them with it! Now that is just not right!" Twilight said getting more and more upset.

          "Ok then I'm sorry for my grusome display ummm...let's see here ummm...wait! I know, how about I pour you some wine." Merlin said trying to cheer her up.

               "Welllllll...ok I guess I'll have some." Twilight said as Merlin went into the kitchen and got to glasses. The two sat down on the sofa while Merlin poured them both a full glass.

             They both drank all of their wine then Merlin said "See, human wine is pretty good right." Merlin realived Twilight looked dizzy. "Sorry if its a little to strong for ya but it looks like we're out of wine any ways so we should go to bed. As Merlin began to get up Twilight used her forelegs to push him back onto the sofa. "Twilight what are you...?" Twilight's horn began to glow then with a flash of light the wine bottle had been refilled and Twilight began to refill the cups.