Chapters I woke up in my chair, my body leaned forward and my head resting on the keyboard of my laptop. This is how I normally woke up now, either with my face in a computer or a book.
I looked at the machine in front of me. "You really should stop letting me fall asleep like that, it's a bit rude." It remained indifferent to my complaints, and only replied with its constant hum.
"Ohh, the silent treatment I see." I was silent for moment, before realizing what exactly I was doing, and put my face in my hands.
"I really need to stop talking to inanimate objects. But it's not like it's any better than talking to myself." I lifted my face and looked back at my machine.
"What do you think?" Again, it only replied with it's constant hum. I stood up and stretched.
"Oh well, old habits die hard." I wasn't even sure if I was talking to myself or my...
"Damn it, I really need to think of something original." I looked around the interior of my machine that I was currently standing in.
"But it's a bit late for that I suppose." I said, flopping back down into my chair. The interior, well, to put it simply it looked like the interior of the ninth and tenth Doctor's TARDIS.
Because I'm just so creative.
"Well, at least it actually works, bigger on the inside and everything. Actually maybe that's not so bad, I mean, I think if anyone could create a bigger on the inside time traveling box, they'd go with a TARDIS."
"I mean yeah, you're not technically a 'TARDIS' as in something that's alive, but I think I hit it pretty close considering what I had to work with." I think I've heard the sound of my own voice enough today, time for thinking in my own head like a normal person.
I think the most striking similarity between my 'TARDIS' and the Doctor's Type-40 TARDIS is that both of them only take you where you want to go half the time. Actually for mine I think it's less than half the time. You know, I don't think it's ever actually once worked completely now that I think about it.
My machine cannot use a time vortex, nor is it alive. I'm not even sure if time vortex's are real, they might not even exist in this universe. I make do with throwing my TARDIS into a wormhole, and faster than light travel. And they're both terrible at traveling through time.
Let me start with wormholes. Basically, a wormhole is a hole in the space-time that can allow you to go to any time and place. The only problem is, it's a completely random thing. And more so, it's a one way ticket, I can't keep a wormhole open for very long before it collapses in on itself. I've used a wormhole only once, when I was drunk (I know, I really shouldn't get drunk when I have a time machine) and I wound up the next morning on the roof of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. To be honest, I was just happy that I didn't appear a few light-years from Earth.
Well, I suppose I am technically using one right now, that's how it stays bigger on the inside. This somewhat helps the multiverse theory in a way. You see, a wormhole isn't just a hole in space and time in this universe, sometimes you get one that takes you to an alternate plane of existence. In this, I don't even know what it is, place I opened a doorway to, there is literally nothing. It's just space. And I do mean nothing, no electromagnetic fields, gravitational fields, radiation, just nothing. I'm not even sure that it is a different universe, it might just be some incredibly remote part of the universe. But, it does make a good place to put the inside of my TARDIS.
And now, faster than light travel. This is a bit more reliable, just accelerate the shell of a TARDIS past or near the speed of light, and off you go into the past or future. Except it's not exactly accurate, it seems like every time I've tried to use it, it always takes further or not as far when I use the same amount of power for the same amount of time. I've overshot dates by 50 years before, it can be more than frustrating.
And it doesn't make the cool vworp sound. I think that's the worst part.
All of that was part of the reason I had given up time travel a while ago, the other part was, well...
"Don't think about it." I muttered to myself. "That just seems to make it worse."
Anyway, I had moved onto space travel, looking for new life in the stars!
Funny how boring it gets when there isn't any. So far, I've been to somewhere around fifteen-hundred planets and around two-hundred moons, with not so much as bacteria on any of them. I even took the extra step of jumping forward a few million years on each of them to see if anything happened, and still nothing.
I was on my way the planet Keppler-22b, it was supposed to be in the Goldilocks zone like Earth, and could develop life. I began the routine of checking that I was still on course for the planet. Then I started laughing to myself.
"Well, it seems I've developed a routine, that's a bit ironic isn't it?" I glanced around the control room.
"As I recall, I built this place to get away from the dull routine that was my life, and yet, here I am in the dull routine of my new life." I grinned at the irony of the situation. Granted, most people probably wouldn't think going from planet to planet as a 'dull routine'. But do anything long enough, and you get used to it. I shot up from my chair and began pacing around the controls.
"Well, last time I wanted to remedy a dull life I built a TARDIS. Whats the next step, build a DeLorean?" I chuckled to myself.
"Well, there is always the wormhole option. Not exactly safe though. On the other hand, I could travel to an alternate reality, maybe one with more than nothing." I began to ready the controls to open up a wormhole. I paused my actions, my hand hovering over the final lever required.
"I could actually die, I could appear on a sun, or a universe where no living thing can survive. There are literally an infinite number of ways this could kill me." I lowered my arm and just stood there for a spell.
"Well, I guess if I do wind up dying, it'll be a good way to go. Besides, there are also an infinite number of ways this could not kill me, so either way, All-." I stopped myself from completing the catchphrase. "I should at least think of something else than 'Allons-y' and 'Geronimo'." I muttered to myself. I tapped my foot while I though about something cool to say.
I snapped my fingers and grinned when I got the idea.
"And down the rabbit hole we go." I said as I pulled the lever.
Apparently this rabbit hole I was currently in had a few potholes along the way. I was hanging onto the control panel having a hard time not falling over and throwing up, the whole damn room was like a roller coaster. Eventually it all stopped, indicated by a rather dull and undramatic thud.
"I really should find a way to make this thing have cool sounds." I said out loud. "Every time machine needs cool sounds." I've probably said that more than once. I ran over to my computer, which was nothing much, just a laptop from 2009 wired into the controls. I began the same routine I do every time I land somewhere,which is start expelling oxygen from within the TARDIS to the outdoor environment so I can at least poke my head out. I started to type in the commands when a message popped up.
'Oxygen Output Unnecessary' Read the message.
"Oxygen output unnecessary? So that means there's already oxygen outside?" I thought a moment before smiling. "If there's oxygen, there could be life."
I clapped my hands together. "SO! Oxygen, possibly life, what do I need?" I began scanning around the interior of the control room. I patted my pockets to check if their usual contents were still there.
"Phone, knife, glasses, key...wheres my watch?" I looked over to the doors to see my brown coat hanging from a coat rack. I walked over and checked the pockets.
"There you are, thought I'd lost you." I said to the fob watch. I rolled my eyes. "Ugh, I really need to kick this habit of talking to inanimate objects." I looked down at the umbrella stand next to the coat rack, its occupants a black umbrella and a sheathed cutlass. I picked up the cutlass and looked at it for a moment.
I shrugged. "Better safe than sorry." I suppose if I really wanted to be safe I could take a gun, but I don't like guns, it's too easy to accidentally kill someone. And if you're a time traveler that doesn't know where they're going half the time, it's even worse. I can't exactly go to 1766 and shoot someone with a 44. magnum, it raises too many questions. And to top it off, I just don't like shooting people.
I put my hands on the door. "Oh man, there could be anything out there." I said to myself. I started laughing from a combination of nervousness and excitement. I opened the doors and stepped outside.
"Damn it!" I said a bit louder than I intended. I threw up my arm to shield my eyes from the sun. I blinked my eyes a few times to try and adjust my eyes to the light. I lowered my arm and realized just what I had shielded my eyes from. A sun.
I closed my eyes and turned my face to the sky. I stood there for I don't know how long, I just got lost in the blissful feeling of the sun dancing on my face. I hadn't felt sunlight like this since I left Earth.
Earth. That jolted my out of my trance, where was I?
"Wait, before I try to figure out where I am.." I said. I turned around to look at the open doors of the blue police box. I slapped myself in the forehead. Idiot, don't leave the door to your time machine unlocked. After locking the doors and putting the key back inside my hidden pocket (a small flap reveals that the pocket on my right leg goes a bit deeper), I turned back around to take in my surroundings.
I was standing on some type of dirt with a dark brownish color. It looked pretty fertile, like something you would see on a farm. I looked forward and saw that I was surrounded by apple trees. I walked toward the closest and put my hand on it, getting a feel for the texture of the bark.
I'm sure I don't look weird at all, standing here, with a big blue box while I touch a tree like I've never seen one before. Which I suppose is half true, I just haven't seen one in a while. A sudden realization shook my out of my tree hugging moment. These were apple trees. I turned my head up.
My stomach groaned as soon as I saw them. Juicy, red, apples. It was almost cartoonish how delicious they looked. I had run out of apples a long time ago, mainly due to the fact that I don't have the space to grow them. I reached up and picked the closest apple, and sat down to enjoy the fruit even more. I got a more intoxicating feeling from the smell of the apple than I did from the sunlight.
Of course the universe wouldn't have that, because almost as soon as sat down I was met with a powerful blow to the back of my head. I fell forward and my vision began to blacken, my last sight being a mixture of brown and green from the trees, as well as some unknown orange thing that I couldn't decipher.
Applejack had been going about her daily applebucking routine, same as everyday. Some ponies might have thought that it would get boring, but Applejack enjoyed it all the same. She found it a good way to vent her frustrations after a difficult day.
Today was not one of those days though. Applejack was in a good mood, going from tree to tree, developing a rhythm with her work. Move to a tree *thunk* . Move to the next tree *thunk* . This continued for some time, it was almost a form of meditation for the hard working earth pony.
That is, until a loud dull thud interrupted her work. Applejack immediately stopped and looked around, trying to pinpoint the source of the noise. She was used to her friends and family sometimes interrupting her, but this was something new.
I wonder what it could be, the only thing I could think of is a tree . Applejack chuckled to herself. Shucks, I'm starting to sound like Zecora .
"Damn it!" Shouted an agitated voice
What in tarnation? That definitely ain't a tree She thought to herself. It didn't take Applejack long to find the source of the noise. She blinked her eyes a few times when she found it, trying to make sure she hadn't overworked herself and wasn't just seeing things.
In front of her stood a tall blue box, as well as something that looked similar to a diamond dog. But the creature had clothes, and it's features were not as ugly as a diamond dogs (even though that isn't saying much). She wasn't sure what to make of the creature, but she noticed what looked to be a sword dangling from the creature's hip.
Best to stay back fer now Applejack thought, studying the sight before her.
Then the creature did something that made Applejack's blood boil, it picked one of the Apple family's precious apples. This creature was armed, and was literally stealing the fruits of her labor. She wondered how she was going to confront the thief, when fortune smiled upon her as the creature sat down to enjoy the fruit, putting its head at about the same level as Applejack. She crept up silently just as the creature was about to take a bite and bought a hoof to the back of its head. The blow delivered the desired effect, as the thing lost its grip on the stolen apple and fell forward.
Applejack trotted over to its side, relived to see its chest rising and falling. While the creature was a thief, she certainly didn't want to kill it. She turned her attention to the large blue box a few feet from the creature. The box stood tall, shaded by one of the nearby apple trees.
Police public call box, now what the hay does that mean? Applejack thought to herself. She noticed what looked like two doors, and pushed one of them with her hoof. When it didn't budge, she tried adding more force with two hooves. Finally she restored to bucking the doors like they were a tree, and still they did not yield.
She turned her attention back to the creature.
Well, he ain't gettin up anytime soon The earth pony thought smugly.
I wonder if Twilight or Fluttershy could help figure out what it is. She noticed the clothes the creature was wearing.
Clothes too, I guess I should get Rarity to. Shucks might as well get the the whole gang together. She smiled at the formulation of her plan, and trotted off to get some rope to make sure whatever it is doesn't escape.
Applejack returned shortly, giving the creature a poke before hog-tying it.
Out like ah light Applejack thought, and set off to gather her friends.
Applejack didn't give much explanation to her friends, just that she found some odd clothed creature in her orchard, along with a blue box.
"So, what does this 'creature' look like?" Twilight asked as they walked down the orchard path.
"I don't rightly know, it looked a bit like a big monkey" Applejack replied.
"You woke me up so we could all look at a monkey?!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed, fairly angry her important afternoon nap had been interrupted for monkeys.
"It ain't a regular monkey Dash, it had clothes, and I'm pretty sure it had a sword to." Applejack said.
"A...sword?" Fluttershy whimpered, her ears flattening against her head in fear.
"Don't worry Fluttershy, I doubt it could beat me in a fight." Rainbow said smugly, holding a hoof to her chest. Applejack nodded.
"Yep, he's out cold after a little talk with my hoof."
"You knocked him unconscious? Applejack, you can't just knock some creature we know nothing about unconscious." Twilight scolded.
"Well he was stealin' my apples!" Applejack said defensively. Twilight could only facehoof in response.
"Come on, it's off the path a bit." Applejack jerked her head to the left, and began following the imprints her hooves made when she left to find her friends.
The six friends soon reached the clearing. The ponies were surprised at what they saw, except for Applejack, who was relived that the creature hadn't moved.
"I'm glad you got us Applejack, that is an odd creature indeed." Twilight said, trying to remember if she had ever read about anything like this.
"Is it still unconscious?" Fluttershy asked, her fears being confirmed as she saw that there was indeed a
"I don't know, but just to be sure..." Twilight's horn began to glow, and a purple flash came from the creatures body.
Twilight smiled "There, it shouldn't wake up for at least another hour." She stepped towards the creature, the other five ponies in tow.
"I've never seen anything like it, have you Fluttershy?" Twilight asked
"No..." Came the reply from the frightened pegasus that was furthest from the creature. Twilight swiveled her head towards the box. Noticing the doors she pressed a hoof against it.
"That ain't gonna work Twi', I couldn't get it open myself." Applejack spoke up. Twilight thought a moment with a hoof to her chin before turning back to the group.
"Alright, we should probably get its weapon off it, and wait for it to wake up."
"You think it can talk?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I would be surprised if it didn't Rainbow, if it can wear clothes it must have some sort of intelligence." Rarity said. Twilight smiled and nodded.
"Exactly, I think we should take it to the barn. Rarity, can you take the sword and anything else it has in its pockets." Rarity nodded, looking nervous about being around the creature. As she got closer, her looked changed from one of nervousness to disapproval.
Why would anything wear this? That jacket is hideous
Using her magic, she withdrew the sword and the creatures pocket contents and quickly backed away from it.
"Alright, I think we should put him in the barn and wait until it wakes up. Rainbow Dash, I want you to guard it and make sure it doesn't try to escape. I want the rest of you to help me examine what was in its pockets and try to get these doors open." Twilight said, assigning each of them jobs. The five ponies nodded in response.
Twilight's horn glowed and the box became engulfed in a purple aura. The box lifted off the ground, wobbling as it did so. Twilight stared to frown.
"Rarity, do you think you can carry the creature? This box is heavier than it looks."
"Of course Twilight." Rarity said. The creature and its pocket contents were soon floating through the air by Rarity's magic.
The walk to Applejack's barn was silent, as the six friends kept their eyes on either the box or the creature. Applejack pushed the doors open when they reached the barn, reveling the dim lantern lit interior filled with hay and barrels of apples.
"Alright, just set him down over there." Twilight said, gesturing to a small pile of hay. Rarity nodded and set the creature down, relieved that she didn't have to carry it anymore.
"Rainbow, fly up there and try to hide yourself in the hay. We'll be outside, let us know if he wakes up." Twilight said, gesturing to the second floor of the barn, which was only filled with more barrels and hay. Rainbow Dash gave a mock salute and pushed the red barn door closed. Twilight dropped the heavy box outside the barn and let out an exhausted sigh.
Whats in this thing, bricks? She thought. Twilight put on a tired smile.
"Come on, lets go inside to look at what was in his pockets." Twilight said, motioning towards the farmhouse. The four ponies nodded in agreement and trotted towards Applejack's home to try and find out what they could about the strange creature and its blue box.
I woke up in a small pile of hay. Well, at least it's a change from the books and computer I usually wake up in.
I tried to sit up but I was restrained by some rope around my wrists and ankles. Hog-tied, great. I started moving my wrists and thumbs, trying to work my way out of the knot. I did get out after about ten minutes, probably helped that I was double jointed in my thumbs.
I successfully sat up in the pile of hay this time. I think I'm in some sort of barn, judging from all the hay and apples. Is this an apple farm? If that's the case, then I guess I'm trespassing and stealing.It would explain the large amount of apple trees I saw outside.
Oh hell, where's my TARDIS? I stood up and quickly started patting myself, checking for my pocket contents and broken bones. I wasn't hurt much, apart from the back of my head where something had hit me. Actually, that might not have been so bad, it was a bit stupid of my to try to eat something that for all I know was poisonous. My cutlass and other items I had were gone, save for the key to my TARDIS, so there's that silver lining.
Alright, time to consider my options. And think inside your head damn it, there could be bugs. I could try to find my TARDIS and get the hell out of here, or I could wait and face my captors. On one hand, they might decide to kill me, but I doubt it. If they wanted to do that, I probably would be dead by now. Besides, they had tied me up and put me in a barn, and taken all my belongings, something you would only do if you wanted information or were a thief. And thieves typically don't want the victim anywhere near them, so whoever my captors are, I assume they want to talk.
Where am I anyway? I am back on Earth? That's unlikely, a wormhole taking me to the same planet twice. But still, the trees, the sun, the apples, it all did remind me of Earth. Or maybe this is a different planet, that just looks similar to Earth. Damn, if this is The same Earth I know, me and my TARDIS are going to have a talk. Though I imagine it's going to be a bit one-sided.
No point in just sitting here I guess. I stood up and began making my way towards the door. I froze when I heard a voice.
"And where do you think you're going?"
Twilight eyed the white bag in the alien known as Lewis's hand.
"A...jelly baby?" He nodded once and put on another smile.
"Yes, they're really good, try one." He said in an encouraging tone.
Jelly babies make for good diplomacy, he thought as Twilight reached out a lavender hoof to examine the treat.
However she never got to, as both the alien and his box vanished in a bright flash of blue and gold.
A few hours earlier...
Celestia was worried.
A new presence had made its way into Equestria. What it was she was not sure, and that was what made it concerning for her. Having lived such a long time, there were few things the sun goddess did not know. She racked her brain for what it could possibly be, the only thing it reminded her of in the least was...Discord.
She shuddered at the thought of his return once again. It didn't feel exactly like Discord's presence, so incredibly chaotic, but it would be like him to try and come up with an unknown just to throw everypony off.
And Celestia could sense two objects that radiated this unknown quality, one more strongly than the other. She had spent the majority of the day pondering what to do when a thought struck her; she set out looking for her sister.
It didn't take long to locate the lunar princess, she was located where she was most of the day. In her room. Napping.
Celestia eased her way into her sister's room.
"Luna? Could you help me with something?"
"Sister, you know I prefer to remain nocturnal." Came the muffled reply from the four poster bed.
"Luna please, it's important." The seriousness of Celestia's tone immediately woke Luna. She got up and walked over to her sister.
"What do you need help with sister?" Inquired the midnight alicorn.
Celestia explained the the two new presences she felt earlier in the day.
"I admit I do feel something new in Equestria, but what do you need my help for?" Celestia smiled.
"I want you to help me summon the whatever these knew beings are by teleportation." Luna looked down towards her hooves.
"Tia, you know my magic hasn't been very well lately..." Celestia moved her head down and nuzzled her sister.
"I know you can do it Luna, I'll help you." Luna looked back up towards her sister.
"Could I summon the lesser of the two...things?" She asked. Celestia smiled at her sister.
"Of course Luna, do you want to start now?"
"Give me some time to prepare, I am not accustomed to being up quiet so early." Celestia nodded, as long as no reports of mass chaos in Equestria came in, she would allow her sister the time she needed to prepare. She left her sister's room to give her the peace and quiet her sister would need.
"Are you ready Luna?" Celestia asked. They had decided it would be best to try and summon the objects to the throne room. While Celestia could very well have assigned a team of unicorns to the task, she felt it better to try and bond with her sister, something she felt she had not done enough of since her sister's return from exile. She had even sent the guards away, this was something she wanted to do with her sister and her sister alone.
"Yes Tia, we are sure we can do this." Celestia shook her head with a grin on her face, Luna had a habit of switching between ancient and modern Equestrian dialect when she became truly serious about something. Luna's confident look confirmed her words, and the two sister's closed their eyes as their horns glowed, focusing on bringing the two objects to them.
In a gold and blue flash, a large blue box deposited itself in front of the sisters, landing with a thud. Celestia and Luna observed it silently before Luna voiced her thoughts.
"Sister, where is the second object you sensed?"
"I am not sure, it should be here."
At this time the second object, though more commonly known as Lewis, was hiding behind the large blue box. Due to a stroke of luck, they had appeared with the doors as well as the human facing away from the two princesses. When he and his box appeared, gravity had taken hold and forced Lewis into a seated position with his back against the doors. He sat there wide eyed with a death grip on his bag of jelly babies, trying to process what just happened.
Okay, flash of light when offering Twilight jelly babies, and now I'm here. He took a glance around the, unbeknownst to him, throne room. Did she do this? No wait, there were two voices that were definitely not Twilight just now, did they bring me here? Must have I suppose, if they sensed me, but how did they manage that? Lewis mentally sighed. When is reason going to return from its lunch break?
Not wanting to make his presence known quiet yet, Lewis opted to stay silent a little longer to discover the intentions of the two voices he heard.
Celestia and Luna looked upon the box from their respective thrones, trying to figure out the significance of it and why they would each be able to sense it.
"Have you seen anything like it sister?"
"No, I have not, I'm curious as to what its purpose is. Does it perhaps police an area?"
"Perhaps, do you think it to be harmful?"
"I doubt it, it appears to be just a box."
While Lewis definitely knew he had heard those voices before, he could not place their owners.
It would be a lot easier to recognize them if they called each other something other than sister.
"But we should still be on the lookout for the second object, we might have to employ my students help for this. I'm sure Twilight would love an opportunity to study this."
Student...Twilight...Sister's.. It finally clicked for the human. Oh! Well that explains a lot; they weren't trying to steal my box or study me, they just wanted to make sure that I wasn't some sort of monster. He glanced around the throne room once more. I feel like I should have realized that sooner. Oh well, I suppose teleportation makes my brain a bit scrambled.
Lewis thoughts were interrupted at the metallic sound of Celestia's and Luna's hooves walking on the marble floor to the other side of the box.
Oh crap, it looks like I've been spying on them doesn't it? What do I tell them, it's just a box? A temple? No, I should just answer their questions honestly. As honestly as I can at least. He looked towards the bag of jelly babies still in his grasp. Hope they like jelly babies.
It suddenly registered with him that the sound of the sisters hooves were no longer echoing about the room, he turned his head from the bag of candy to his left, and was met with the sight of princess Luna.
Of course, she might be called something other than Luna, but I'm pretty sure that's her. . The human found the mane that flowed with a lack of wind to be somewhat hypnotizing. He smiled nervously at her, to which Luna narrowed her eyes at him. Ouch, wasn't Luna supposed to be all nice and motherly and whatnot? Or am I thinking of Celestia? Oh well, multiverse.
"Um, hello." He said in a very nervous tone, still smiling.
"Thou shalt address us as princess Luna, strange creature!" Luna shouted as a normal pony would, not using the royal Canterlot voice (something that took much training from her sister).
"Sister, that is no way to treat a guest." Lewis turned his head to see the slightly taller princess Celestia.
"Ah," He said, standing up. "You must be the ones that brought me here." The nervous demeanor had vanished from his voice. Celestia nodded once.
"Yes, I princess Celestia, and my sister, princess Luna, summoned you here." Lewis was grateful that she didn't put any extra stress one the word 'princess'.
"How?" He said in a curious tone. Celestia raised her eyebrows slightly.
"Don't you want to know why we summoned you?"
"To make sure I wasn't a threat, correct?" Celestia nodded.
"Yes, that is why we summoned you here." Celestia said. Wasn't Luna the one that had the trouble with 'we' and 'I'? Or did they both bring me here?
"Okay, um, just curious, but how exactly do you plan on going to do that?" Celestia and Luna both held their stoic expressions.
"We are going to look inside your memories." Lewis gulped nervously.
I'm screwed
A/N: Wow, been a while since the last update hasn't it? I think I completely rewrote this one several times, despite how short it is. The next chapter will hopefully not be delayed as much. Hope you all enjoyed.
This was not a good day for Twilight Sparkle.
It had started out fairly normal, she was reading through some books when Applejack told her about some strange thing and a box that she found in her orchard. Twilight was intrigued, as was her curious nature.
When she and her friends met the creature, she was indeed surprised. All Applejack had told her was that it had tried to steal her apples. She was very much surprised when she found it petting Applejack's dog, and talking to it. And the strange box, she had one theory rolling around in her head that the human was an alien, and the box his ship. The only problem she ran into with this was that the box was far to small too house all the material required for space flight, but perhaps he held some sort of advanced technology. Her mind had been filled with questions, where does he come from, what is the box, and what in Equestria is a jelly baby?
Imagine her disappointment and surprise when both the human and his box vanished right in front of her and her friends eyes.
At first nopony said anything, they merely stared in shack at the ground where the two once stood. It was finally Pinkie Pie of all ponies who did something. That something was to stand on the spot where the box and human once stood, wave her hooves about as if checking they were still there.
"They're gone!" She finally exclaimed. This brought everypony out of their shock as all present except Pinkie Pie facehoof'd simultaneously. This only left one burning question in Twilight's and everypony else's minds.
Where had they gone?
The human in question was currently having a few panicked thoughts run through his head.
Somethings not right here, I doubt every new creature they meet has to have its memories, there must be something different about me. Well, I am an alien from a different universe, but they wouldn't know that.
"Call it a hunch, but something tells me that not every new creature you meet gets the opportunity to have a princess go sifting through my memories, what makes me so special?"
Celestia opted to answer his question with one of her own. "Tell me, how long have you been in Equestria?"
So it is called Equestria? This is way too many similarities between the television show and where I now stand.
The question surprised Lewis slightly, but he gave his answer all the same.
"Around a few hours, I'm not really sure, I was unconscious for a bit." Celestia nodded, his answer confirming her thoughts.
"My sister and I sensed a presence earlier in the day, around a few hours ago. I have ruled this land for over a thousand years, and only occasionally have we been able to sense the presence of two new beings." Lewis noticed that the tone Celestia took when she said that implied that the last time she was able to sense something, it wasn't good.
Alright, judging from the not so friendly looks and reception, this probably won't go well. Heck, for all I know doing something minor on my world might be considered a serious crime here. Ugh, this multiverse thing, I'm not allowed to take any chances. Thoughts of himself being executed and his precious machine being used for greedy advances and obtaining god-like power ran through his head. No....no I can't allow that. I'd sooner die then let that box be put to use in an evil manner. Such a shame that this has to end this way...I would have enjoyed another friend.
He stuck his hand in his pocket, finding the key to the doors.
I'll have to be quick...
"Well, Celestia, Luna." Lewis said. Luna opened her mouth to tell him off for not addressing her as princess Luna, but he spun around on his heel and tried plunged the key into the keyhole of the blue box.
The sudden movement made Luna think he was drawing a weapon and, unfortunately for the human, his actions were halted by a stun spell originating from Luna's horn.
"Urk-." Was the sound he let out as his body crumpled at the foot of the twin doors, the key falling out of his hand onto the long carpet they both stood.
"Sister, I don't think that was the most diplomatic of solutions." Celestia said, lightly scolding her sister. Luna responded with a huff.
"I thought he was drawing a weapon." Luna said simply. Celestia looked at the unconscious body of the human.
"I think he was scared, did you see his expression when we said we were going to look through his memories?"
"Probably because he committed some horrible deed in his past he does not wish others to see."
"Perhaps. At least now we will be able to check his memories to see if he presents a threat."
"I know 'Tia, I'm curious myself as to his origins." Luna said. Celestia smiled at her sister, there was the Luna she had missed, full of curiosity and how the world worked.
Celestia ordered the two unicorn guards that stood outside the throne room to stand by in case something went wrong, such as the creature waking up in the middle of the memory spell. They had decided it would best to view what he had been doing earlier in the day, even though no reports of a strange creature running rampant in Equestria they still had to make sure.
"Ready Luna?"
"Ready 'Tia."
The two sisters touched both of their horns to the creature's forehead, and commenced the spell. A flash of white soon filled their vision, before finding themselves in Lewis's mind.
The scape in which the castor finds themselves in varies from subject to subject. Each subconscious will vary depending on the individual, though typically a series of doors leading to memories are constructed inside the subject's subconscious.
Our traveling human's mind had settled on something similar to that. Instead of doors, there stood the police boxes he had arrived in, stretching on in a single row for as far as the two could see. These stood in no hallway, but instead seemed to be suspended in the void of space with no visible floor, but floated nonetheless. Looking past the boxes into space twinkling stars and nebula, even a galaxy could be seen.
"I like it." Luna said, smiling at all the objects in the sky. Celestia smiled as well, more so that her sister was happy than the various objects floating in space.
Each box had a light flowing from it, the closest one from them had a light flickering from words and windows of the box.
"Come sister, let's find out whats inside." Luna, somewhat reluctantly, tore her eyes from the sky and made her way over to the box. As soon as Celestia touched a hoof to it, the scene around them changed.
The boxes began to melt away, the stars began descending from the sky, changing in color and shape. The two soon found themselves in a completely new area.
Celestia and Luna were incredibly confused at the strange room they were in, a hemispherical shaped room with a large tube running up the center, and various knobs, switched, and levers wrapped around it. Strange, bulb-like things adorned the wall everywhere. And the creature, he was there as well, sitting in a chair. Then he began talking, much to the convenience of the two. Since Lewis was unconscious, his thoughts would not be broadcast to the two sisters. Although they were not viewing the room from Lewis's point of view, they saw it as if they were there when the memory occurred. Anything they saw that was not in Lewis's line of sight was filled in by his subconscious as it was last viewed by the human.
Time travel, TARDIS, wormholes. Luna and Celestia understood little of what he spoke. Then the memory reached the point of his appearance in Equestria. They saw how the large hemispherical room was contained in the blue box. The thought of leaving the memory and opening the doors in the real world to confirm this briefly crossed their minds, but they both realized that they would need to see his actions so far in Equestria.
They watched his fairly harmless interactions with the ponies, though it did strike Celestia as an odd coincidence that he met her student, and his reaction to Rainbow Dash was strange as well. When the memory reached the point of Lewis being knocked unconscious by Luna's stun spell, the scenery began to dissolve back into the hallway filled with the blue boxes.
"Now what sister?" Luna asked, going back to staring at the stars as she spoke.
"I'm not sure, he seems fairly harmless, but why was he trying to run earlier?"
"Perhaps looking into some of his other memories will give an answer." Celestia nodded.
"They might indeed, let's try the next one."
There was only one difference in all of the boxes stretching in the row. While the first emitted a flickering white light, the rest produced a dull yellow. Celestia placed a hoof on the second box in the row, and again the colors and shapes melted away to reveal the same hemispherical room.
The memory started much like the other had, with Lewis waking up in his chair and talking to inanimate objects. He walked around the controls, fiddling with various ones. As he did, he muttered "maybe this time". When he touched certain levers and switches, the room would shake in response. When he stopped using the controls, he walked towards the doors and stepped through them.
Luna and Celestia looked out onto a barren red-orange landscape, made of something appearing to be sand.
"Sister, look! The stars!" Luna exclaimed.
"Yes, what about them?"
"These stars have never appeared above Equestria."
"But that would mean..." Luna turned to her sister and nodded.
"Yes, we're standing on a different planet."
"So that's what it does..." Celestia said.
"A spacecraft..."
"I had thought that he was uncloaking the box when he first arrived, not landing from a different planet!"
"It must have taken an incredible amount of magic to create this." Luna and Celestia looked at the human, who was holding out a blue rectangular device in his outstretched hand. He stood like that for a few moments, before the device gave a small chirp.
No Signs Of Life Encountered , read the message on the blue device.
Lewis let out a sigh, and with a face of extreme disappointment, he retreated back to the blue box. The memory soon dissolved back into the long row of blue boxes.
"He was searching for life?" Luna said.
"It seems, perhaps he is an explorer for his kind. That could explain why we haven't seen anything like him before."
"Or he could have been exiled from his kind, let's look through a few more." Celestia nodded in agreement, even though she suspected Luna just wanted to look at how many different planets the human had encountered.
Celestia placed a hoof against the next box, emitting a dull yellow light like the previous one. The memory played almost exactly the same, the only difference being the planet. They tried the next box over and found the same thing. And the next one, and the next one, and the next one. All of them contained the human finding a planet, searching for signs of life, finding none, and then departing. Some memories he didn't even find a new planet, but would sit staring at the computer and talk to himself or inanimate objects.
Luna and Celestia found though, that they did not actually have to walk form box to box. If they wished, the boxes would fly past them as they stood still. Finally they reached an anomaly.
While the first box had a flickering white light coming from it, and the others so far had a dull yellow, this one contained no sort of light; The words and windows were unlit. Luna and Celestia had decided to skip over a few of the boxes, but this one needed investigation as to why it wasn't lit.
When the memory began, it started the same as the others, with Lewis waking up sitting in his chair. He would type for a short time, move some levers, then sit back down. For some reason, he was silent in this memory, not once making a remark to himself or his machine. He opened the doors and went outside just as in every memory, and received the same response.
No Signs Of Life Encountered
Instead of the disappointed sigh he had let out in past memories (technically the memories the two had already viewed were in the future relative to the memory they were currently viewing), he began trembling with anger. He walked back towards the box, and once inside, began shouting.
"This is all your fault! I should never have built you!" He began punching the console, his fist becoming bloody.
"If I hadn't built you, I would have a normal fucking life! I would still be on Earth!" He began punching the tube extending from the center of the room..
"SAY SOMETHING!" He screamed, delivering a hard punch to the tube. He eventually stopped, his body shuddering. His eyes were leaking tears, and were bloodshot.
"Please, just say something." He said softly. He just collapsed there on the floor, every few seconds a sob escaping from him.
Celestia and Luna watched all of this unfold in stunned silence. They did not speak, even when the room dissolved back into the rows of blue boxes. They didn't know what to say to each other, each trying to understand what happened.
"So!" A voice said from behind them. The two whirled around to face the voice. It was Lewis, standing there in a blue pinstripe suit, leaning on a black umbrella. His voice was dripping with venom.
"How do you like my mind?"
A very frazzled maned Twilight stood in front of the mysterious blue box. She and her friends had been trying for the past hour to get the doors open, although it was mostly her doing the work. She had tried a number of spells, from lock-picking, to trying to force the doors open. None worked, and it was starting to grind on Twilight's nerves.
What's in here anyway? Whats so important that somepony would go through this much trouble to lock it? She wondered.
Noticing her friends distress, Pinkie decided she would try her hoof at opening the doors.
"Tell us your secrets!" She shouted, pointing a hoof at the box, to which it gave no response.
Examining the creatures pocket contents did not yield much information either. The contents were fairly normal, a watch, a pair of glasses, and a knife. The objects held no sorts of enchantment on them, the only odd object was a small blue rectangular block with a black face. The black face seemed to have some sort of glassy quality to it, but Twilight or any of the other mares could figure it out. They had been set aside a while ago on the ground.
Twilight dragged her hoof across her face as Pinkie continued her interrogation of the box. Her horn glowed as she prepped yet another spell to try and open the doors.
"Twilight?" Applejack asked.
"Hmm?" Twilight said, eyes closed in concentration.
"Should we really be doing this?" Applejack asked, a slightly worried look on her face. Twilight stopped the spell and turned to face her friend.
"What do you mean?"
"Ah don't know whats in that there box, but whatever it is, somepony went to a lot of trouble to make sure it ain't opened."
"You think there might be something dangerous inside?"
"I can't say fer sure, but I don't know if we should be takin' any chances." The farm mare replied. Twilight thought for a moment.
"You're right Applejack, let's wait until the creature wakes up." Applejack nodded her approval.
"Ah'm gonna go get us some apple juice." With that Applejack walked off towards her home. Twilight collapsed on the ground, exhausted from trying so many various spells to open the doors. She looked towards her friends.
Rarity was doing a closer examination of the fob watch, Fluttershy was petting Winona, and Pinkie...was still 'interrogating' the box.
I wonder if it's woken up yet? She thought as she closed her eyes.
"And where do you think you're going?" The voice said. I was frozen where I stood. A voice . An actual, intelligent voice . A voice hasn't spoken to me since I left Earth.. and if there is one intelligent being here, then there are probably more. I smiled like I haven't smiled in a while, I could actually talk to someone besides myself. Crap, wait, alien, how the hell do I greet it? Or is it alien? Maybe this is an alternate Earth? Do I smile? Well I'm already smiling, well I can't really stop smiling, I mean this is just so damn exciting! Screw it, just turn around.
I spun around with a smile on my face, which quickly vanished when I found nothing but hay and apple barrels in front of me. That's..not good. Either I'm hallucinating or there are now talking hay and apples. I'm not really sure which is better at this point. I started scanning around the room looking for the source of the voice, and really hoping I'm not in the land of talking apples.
I noticed there was a second level to the barn, presumably filled with probably more hay and apples. And there was something else, a blue..were those rainbows? It was had some blue and rainbow..and...eyes.
"What?" That was all I said. Its eyes widened somewhat, like it was surprised that I could speak. Or maybe surprised I could speak the same language as her. Her? How do I know its a her? It actually looks a lot like a pony, like a little pony...
"OH!" I shouted, pointing a finger to Rainbow Dash. That was Rainbow Dash! From My Little Pony!
I started remembering a lot of things about good 'ol Friendship is Magic. I don't think the blow to the back of my head made me forget, I think I just forgot over the course of whenever I left Earth.
Damn it! Stop wondering about why for some reason you forgot about a TV show from Earth, and focus on the fact that Rainbow Dash is in front of you! I swear my grin got wider, it was beginning to hurt.
"Hello!" I said cheerfully. Rainbow Dash narrowed her eyes at me in suspicion. I don't think my smile is giving off the 'oh look he's nice and friendly' feeling. I think it's more 'oh god why does he have a knife'. I toned down my smile a bit, Rainbow Dash was still scowling at me.
"Um, hello?" I tried again, waving a hand towards her. Her face did not change at all.
"Well, if you're not going to talk I suppose I'll just be going.." No I won't, but I'm fairly sure she'll call my bluff. I spun on my heel and headed for the door.
"Hold it!" She said in her tomboyish voice. I didn't turn around, but my grin returned, not quite as wide and creepy I hope. I heard a fluttering of what I assumed to be wings, and a soft landing from the pegasus.
"Alright buddy, keep your hooves where I can see them and don't try anything funny." Rainbow Dash said in almost a growl. That wiped my smile off my face, I don't take kindly to being put under suspicion when I've done nothing. Well, mostly nothing, if this is Equestria, then I was probably stealing Applejack's apples.
I stuffed my hands into my pockets. "First off, they're hands, and second, I don't think it really matters considering you took everything from my pockets." Well, not entirely true, still have the key. Wow, my first conversation in who knows how long and I decide to be snarky, and with a being that is something of a celebrity back home no less. I mentally slapped myself, I should at least try to be civil.
Rainbow Dash didn't respond for a while, probably mulling over what I said. Maybe she was surprised? I wonder if there are any other humans here. Or maybe Doctor Whooves is here? That would be an awkward encounter, considering I copied his TARDIS exterior and control room...
"Are you a spy?" Oh god, I couldn't help it, I just outright giggled at that.
"Whats so funny?" I went from giggling to full blown laughing
"Stop it!" I doubled over onto the ground, holding my sides while laughing. My eyes were even starting to water from the laughing. Rainbow Dash remained silent during my laughing.
I finally got up after about a minute. I stood and ran my hand through my hair.
"Okay, I'm normal now. Well, relatively speaking heh." I had toned down my smile some, so as to not seem too creepy. That may be a lot cause at this point though...
Rainbow Dash was standing with her mouth open and her head cocked to the side, giving me a look that I interpreted as 'dafuq?'. That lasted for only a few seconds before she shook her head.
"Look, I don't know what you are, but I'm going to go get my friends and tell them you woke up." I nodded my head.
"Sure, go right ahead." I said with a mad grin.
"O..kay?" She said it like she was surprised I was just going to let her go. Maybe she was expecting me to be angry? Or is she expecting me to set up some sort of trap?
Rainbow Dash walked towards the barn door and pulled it open enough herself out, leaving me inside the lantern lit barn.
The five friends were sitting by the box, sipping on the refreshments Applejack had given them. They talked about anything, anything that is except for the box. Twilight got frustrated just at the thought of trying to open the doors.
They turned their heads at the sound of Rainbow Dash approaching for a landing.
"Hey Rainbow, is it awake?" Twilight asked, standing up from the ground.
"Yeah..it's awake." Rainbow Dash replied, having a distant look on her face.
"Rainbow Dash, are you alright?" Twilight asked.
"Yeah, it's just, I don't know, that thing is just weird." She said. The conversation reminded her of how her first encounter with Pinkie went. Granted it wasn't as random, but it was odd to say the least.
"Can it talk?"
"Yeah it can talk, it was smiling a lot too."
"Really!?" Pinkie exclaimed. Her fear was quieted a little when she found out it smiled, thinking that anything that smiles can't be all bad.
"Yeah, lets go see it, I don't want it trying to run away." I've already missed my nap, I don't want to take extra time to track down some monkey thing She thought.
The six friends trotted along the path to Applejack's barn, Winona accompanying them. Soon Winona stopped walking and stood still, sniffing the air. Seeming to have caught a scent of something, she broke off into a run towards the barn, barking along the way.
"Winona!" Applejack called out, giving chase to her dog. The rest of her friends followed in pursuit.
Welp, no point in me waiting around in a barn. As interesting as apples and hay are, I think I'm going to go back outside and enjoy the sunshine.
I pulled the barn door open, pleased to find that the sun was still shining. I leaned back against the door and sat down with my legs crossed. It'll probably help me seem less intimidating since I'm a bit taller than these ponies.
I closed my eyes and allowed myself to soak up the sun. Apparently I'm all smiles again, though not quite as much as when I just encountered Rainbow freaking Dash.
I've already had my mental breakdown about being in Equestria haven't I? Or does the laughing fit not count?
My thoughts on whether or not I had had my necessary freak-out over being in Equestria were interrupted by the sound of hooves and something that sounded closer to someone running barefoot than a pony running, as well as barking.
Barking? I opened my eyes and turned my head towards the source of the sound.
I saw a dog, running at me and barking. I couldn't tell what kind of dog it was, it had a brown coat with a white streak running down its chest and its muzzle, as well as a red collar adorning its neck.
The dog ran up to me, still barking. I remained in my seated position, standing up quickly might cause it to become scared and bite me. When it was about a foot away, it stopped barking and looked at me head cocked to the side.
"Hello." I said, smiling. I probably shouldn't be smiling, it could take it as a sign of hostility since I'm showing my teeth. Well, that's how it is for Earth dogs, maybe it's different here?
The dog blinked in response, as if surprised that I spoke. Wasn't this Applejack's dog or something? Argh, some stuff about the show is a bit fuzzy in my memory.
I reached out a hand towards the dog, it recoiled slightly at it. Then it went and sniffed my hand some, I smiled a bit more as the dog's breath tickled my hand. It stopped sniffing after a few seconds and stood still, I began to pet the dogs head. She stepped closer to me and pressed her head against my head. Well, I'm fairly sure it's a she, I think that's what is was in the show.
"Whats your name?" I asked the dog. Hey, multiverse, maybe she could talk? I stopped scratching her head and took a look at the tag hanging from her collar. 'Winona' The tag read.
"Winona, right." I said, I resumed petting Winona, scratching behind her ears. She laid her head down on my leg and let me pet her. Heh, I always was a dog person.
"You wouldn't happen to know a pony named Applejack would you?" I asked Winona. Okay, maybe she can't talk, but understand what I'm saying? I think she at least understood 'Applejack' because she lifted her head and looked at me when I said her owners name.
"Right, I think shes a bit angry at me, don't suppose you could put in a good word for me could you?" I asked Winona, touching the spot on the back of my head where I had been hit. She just continued to stare at me. I sighed and went back to petting her, and she rested her head on my leg again. Okay, maybe she couldn't understand me completely. Or Winona just really likes being scratched behind the ears.
I continued petting Winona for some time, not really thinking about much, just relaxing. I think this would qualify for another laughter break down, but I'm tired from the last one. God I'm lazy. Anyway, after some time petting Winona, I got that feeling of being watched.
I turned my head to the right to see six ponies staring at me. Ah, those would be the hooves I heard. Even Rainbow Dash, who I had not seen leave the air the entire time I saw her, was grounded. I gave the same response when I first saw Rainbow Dash.
"Oh." But I said it in a much calmer tone than last time. I don't know, I think petting Winona helped me calm down greatly. As for Winona, she was tuning into her inner honey badger and not really caring much for what was going on around her.
Twilight was the one to break the silence. "What are you?" Fair question I suppose.
"An apple thief apparently. Sorry about that Applejack." I said, looking towards Applejack. Not sure if calm or lazy, probably the latter. Her eyes widened some when I said her name.
Twilight opened her mouth, but I cut her off before she could say anything.
"Yes, I know that's not the answer you were looking for. I'm a human." Twilight was silent for a moment, looking at me in thought. Finally she put on a smile and held out a hoof to me.
"I'm Twilight Sparkle." I took her hoof and shook it up and down gently. Her hoof felt weird, I mean it was fuzzy of course, but also somewhat rubbery. Definitely not like the hooves on Earth. Twilight was smiling with a giddy expression on her face, probably brimming with questions. Applejack stepped forward, either to apologize or tell me off for trying to steal her apples, when a pink blur zipped in front of me.
"Hi my names Pinkie Pie and I've never seen anything like you before do you have any human friends do you like parties and cupcakes I love parties and cupcakes but you could tell that from my cutie mark, wait do you have a cutie mark? Why are you wearing clothes, do humans have any funny words 'cause ponies have some pretty funny words like pickle barrel and kumquat do humans have those words-" I clamped my hand over her mouth before she could say any more. I took a deep breath.
"Hi Pinkie Pie my name's Lewis and I've never seen anything like you either, well we have ponies but they're not as colorful. And no I don't have a lot of friends actually now that I think about it I don't have any friends really. I haven't had a party or cupcakes in a while but it sounds like a lot of fun, no cutie mark, and clothes because I don't have fur so I get colder easier." I replied at a speed that was close to how Pinkie Pie had been talking. Pinkie was staring at me, I looked behind her and the rest of the ponies were staring at me with their mouths agape. I removed my hand from Pinkie's muzzle.
Pinkie stared at me for a while. I know Fluttershy is famous for her stare, but damn Pinkie can pull one off. It wasn't threatening, it was like she was looking inside me, trying to figure out what I'm like I suppose.
"You don't have any friends?" I ran my hand through my hair, of course that's what she would take away from my long winded speech. I was hoping she would notice I didn't give her any funny human words.
"Well..no." Not exactly a whole lot of people to met in space. That and I burned most of my bridges with Earth. Most.
"Why not?" Pinkie said, cocking her head to the side. The look on the other ponies faces showed they were curious as well.
"There aren't exactly a whole lot of other humans for me to meet where I live."
"What, you live under a rock or something?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Not exactly, its a bit difficult to explain." I doubt I can just say 'I live alone inside a box in space'.
"Well, you have a friend now Mr. Human!" Pinkie said. I smiled softly at Pinkie.
"Thanks.." I said, much more quietly than I had been speaking previously. Friends, haven't had those in a while.
We were all silent for a moment, the six ponies staring at me. I felt a bit uncomfortable with all the attention on me, so I went back to petting Winona.
"So aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" I said, finally breaking the silence. Twilight perked up.
"Oh right, sorry." She said with a sheepish smile. FFFF, my lack of watching ponies has left me incredibly susceptible to their D'awws.
"Girls, why don't you introduce yourself." She said. The first to step forward was Applejack, I think she was going to introduce herself before Pinkie started her hyper rant.
"Howdy there, my name's Applejack." She said, smiling and holding out a hoof. I took it the same way I didn't Twilight's, except Applejack damn near ripped my arm out of its socket. After we broke the handshake, Applejack didn't step back. Instead she started looking at her hooves like they were the most interesting things in the universe.
"Look, I'm sorry that I attacked ya. Ya didn't know they were my apples." She said looking at the ground, apologizing must be difficult for her.
"Applejack." I said, causing her to look at me. "I'm not angry at you, you were only protecting yourself and your land, honestly I'm impressed at your bravery. You attacked a creature that was taller than you and was armed, that takes some serious guts." Applejack was smiling brightly after I accepted her apology. The next to approach me was Rainbow Dash, she flew up towards me.
"I'm Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer in Equestria!" She said, holding a hoof to her chest. I chuckled at her boasting.
"Pleased to meet you." I said. Rainbow Dash got a questioning look on her face.
"Hey what was with the..you know." Oh right, my laughter break down thingy.
"Oh, umm, I think I just freaked out a bit from finding a new sapient species." Rainbow Dash looked confused at the word sapient, then a look of understanding dawned on her face.
"Oh, so you were pretty blown away by my awesomeness." Rainbow Dash said like it was the most logical explanation for it.
"What? N- Yeah sure." Might as well just let her have her moment.
"Sweet." Rainbow Dash said, hoof pumping in the air. I chuckled at her display.
"Alright Rainbow Dash, calm down." Rarity said in her posh voice. She turned her attention to me.
"Hello dear, my name is Rarity, Ponyville's local tailor."
"It's a pleasure to meet you." I said, best keep up my manners. She eyed the brown jacket I was wearing.
"Tell me, is that considered fashionable in the human world? It seems a bit..."
"Hideously generic?" I finished. Rarity nodded immediately.
"Yes! I mean, I just don't understand why anypony would wear such a thing." She then realized how that sounded. "No offense.." She added.
"None taken, I try my best to go unnoticed by most humans." I replied. Rarity got a surprised look on her face.
"Why in Equestria would you do that?" She asked. I sighed.
"Again, it's a bit complicated." I wore clothing that wouldn't stand out on Earth in most any time period so as not to draw attention to myself, being a time traveler and all. Can't have someone notice I've been in two different places one hundred years apart from each other.
Rarity nodded and seemed to accept that answer, for now at least. I turned my head to Pinkie Pie, who was wearing a giddy smile.
"Well Pinkie, I've already met you."
"Yep, and you never told me a funny human word!" Pinkie said.
"Alright, give me a sec." I rubbed my chin trying to think of a word. I snapped my fingers when I thought of a perfect one.
"Alright Pinkie here's a funny human word." She leaned in closer to hear it better, even the rest of the ponies looked curious as to what this word was.
"It's...Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious."
"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious?"
"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious." I said, smiling. Pinkie smiled in return.
"Your'e right, that is a funny word! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!" Oh god what have I done.
"Alright Pinkie, calm down for now, I still need to meet one more pony." Thankfully Pinkie nodded her head and made a zipping motion with her lips. I looked towards the yellow pegasus that was the furthest from me, hiding behind her mane.
"Hello." I said. I wonder if she saw the little conversation I had with Winona, who by the way was still sitting on my lap enjoying being scratched behind her ears.
"I'm Flut..." That was all I heard, but oh god the amounts of D'aw. Good thing I already know her name.
"Nice to meet you Fluttershy." She almost immediately came out from behind her mane.
"You heard me?"
"Of course" Fluttershy smiled, probably because she didn't have to go through the five minute process of someone trying to hear her name. Oh of course, I can remember that , but I can't remember the name of Applejack's dog.
"Well, now that we have introductions out of the way, do any of you know what happened to my box?" I'm curious as to whether they managed to get it open. It's supposed to only be able to be opened by my key, but magic...
"Oh, it's just over there." Twilight said pointing a hoof down the path where I could see the large blue box, further down the path I could what was probably Applejack's house.
"Were you able to open the doors?"
"No! What have you got in there that is so important that the doors are impossible to open!" Twilight snapped. Okay, I guess she's been trying to get them open for a while now. Actually her mane did look a bit messy. She realized what she just did and looked towards the ground.
"Sorry.." She said in an ashamed tone.
"It's alright." I wonder if these ponies know I'll probably let them get away with anything if they hit me with the puppy dog eyes.
"So what have you got in there?" Twilight asked in a normal tone. I mulled that over a bit, how do I explain this one to them? I decided on a simple answer.
"Oh you know, stuff." Yeah you know, a costume mask, some socks, time machine. Ya know, just the stuff you normally find in boxes.
"Well how'd ya get it in ta my orchard?" Applejack asked, sounding more curious than angry.
"With extreme amounts of difficulty." Besides, its not like I was planning on the Applejack's orchard, or this universe for that matter. Applejack seemed to get the hint that I wasn't going to tell her just how I got it there. I pushed Winona off my leg, much to her displeasure. I could tell because the dog was actually frowning at me. That was a new feeling, being frowned at by a dog. I think it was a bit weirder than whenever the ponies showed emotions because Winona just looked like a regular dog, so I guess I was surprised on some level to see her do something like frown. That and I don't think she got a whole lot of screen time.
I stood up and began stretching my legs, they had begun to fall asleep from Winona laying on them. As I was working out various kinks in my body I could feel the eyes of the ponies on me, I didn't really care though.
I looked down onto the ponies. "So, lets go see the box shall we?" I said, flashing them a toothy grin. Not waiting for an answer I began strolling towards the box, I eventually heard the sound of hooves following me, as well as Pinkie bouncing along. We walked in silence, and I could still feel the eyes of the ponies on me. Can't really blame them I suppose.
We reached my TARDIS soon, I noticed that my cutlass and other pocket contents were scattered before the box.
"Oh, that's where those were." I said to no one in particular. I put everything except my phone in its proper place. The phone was an iPhone I had painted TARDIS blue, as well as made some modifications to its performance abilities. I figured the phone could be a stepping stone in the explanation of my machine. Granted, pretty big leap from phone to TARDIS, but still better than nothing. I put a hand against the side of the police box, I haven't actually seen the outside for a while.
I turned around to face the six ponies.
"So how do you open it?" Twilight asked. I smiled and brought the key out of my pocket. Twilight's mouth opened a bit in surprise
"That's it? A key?"
"That's it." Twilight rolled her eyes and grumbled something I couldn't understand. I turned back around to the TARDIS.
"Hold on, just let me put my sword up." I could hear a collective sigh of relief from behind me. I opened a single door and stepped in halfway, just enough to place my cutlass back inside the umbrella holder. I noticed my second jacket hanging from the coat rack, identical to the one I was wearing. I checked the pockets and found a familiar paper bag.
I smiled to myself, this very well may be the only chance I get to do this, I only had ten of these things left. Good thing they were artificial, otherwise I suppose it would be cannibalization.
I stepped back outside and locked the doors, I saw Twilight eyeing the white paper bag inside my hand.
"Twilight." I said, holding out the bag towards her. "Would you like a jelly baby?"