In Spike We Trust

In Spike We Trust

• Cornflak

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For a long time, everything calmed down. Everypony got off my case and I found it a lot easier to forget about all the stuff with Discord, the Elements, and Celestia. I figured that maybe I’d start focusing on Rarity again. I asked her if she wanted to go see a movie. It didn’t even take her half a second to squeal and give me a spinning hug.

And that’s where I am right now. I’m watching this movie and she’s sitting really close to me. My heart’s beating too fast, so I try to concentrate on the big screen. At this point, it’s almost over. The main guy is really old and he lives in a nice mansion with a butler and everything. It gets a little weird because he has no friends or family with him. I don’t think he minds it, though. He looks a little crazy, anyway.

Rarity keeps scooting closer to me. I don’t even think she’s watching the movie anymore. I’m afraid she’ll be staring at me if I try to get a quick look. I have to stop and wonder if everypony gets this way around the pony they love.

It’s still bright outside after the movie. I ask Rarity what she wants to do next and she says it doesn’t matter as long as we’re doing it together. That makes me feel really warm inside. But it wasn’t really an answer, so we both just walk around town square for a little bit.

I really don’t wanna ruin this again like last time, but I have some questions that I have to ask. It can’t be any worse than setting her hair on fire.

I swallow hard and decide to let it wait for some other time. All that stuff is in the past now. I shouldn’t worry about what she thinks of me, right?

“Spike, darling, have I ever told you how ravishing you are?” Rarity helps me snap out of my trance. I feel my cheeks warming up and turning red.

“Really? Heh, you think so?”

“We simply must go out more often. Don’t you agree?”

“Uh...well, yeah! We should!” I feel a little bounce in my step.

“Oh, Spike, could we sit down and have dinner over there?”

I look to where she’s pointing. It takes me a minute to even hear what she said. It’s like she can’t focus on just one thing right now.

“It looks really fancy.” I’m talking about the really expensive restaurant that got her attention.

“But that’s the point, Spikey Wikey! I think we deserve a little treat tonight, don’t you?”

“Do they have gems?”

“Of course they have gems, dear! Only the finest quality in all of Equestria!”

I have trouble believing that, but I guess it wouldn’t hurt to find out. They seat us in a booth with candles between us. The whole place is kind of dark. Rarity says something about atmosphere and fancy stuff. After we order our food, she asks me what I love most about her.

“Um...well, you’re really pretty...” I can’t look her in the eyes. I’m losing my breath. Why would she ask a weird question like that?

“Oh, Spike, is that all?”

I don’t know what the right answer is.

Can I just disappear?

Is that an option?

“No, no! That’s not the only thing!” I fake a laugh and it gets her laughing too.

Good. She’s not pissed.

But I still can’t come up with anything else.

“Ahem. Your dinner’s arrived.”

That’s our waiter, just in time to distract us from that awkward question. I look down at my bowl of rubies. It’s kinda sad, but I can easily think of more reasons why I love the taste of gems.

I didn’t always feel this way.

I really did love Rarity.

Well, maybe I loved who she used to be.

Now she’s just a mindless puppet that’s obsessed with me.

I don’t want that.

“Really, Spike, you must stop being so handsome! I just might faint!”

I give a half smile and sigh. This is just depressing. It’s been going on for weeks now. Ever since I was proven innocent in court, I’ve been trying to take my mind off the murder. I’ve been ignoring the spell that Discord has on Rarity. I tossed that crown in my closet, right next to the Elements of Harmony.

I have to see if I’m wrong about all this. I’ll just test the waters a little. Twilight would want me to look at all the possibilities.

“So, uhh...anyway...” I clear my throat, “How’s your salad?”

She looks down at her food like she didn’t even know it was there until now.

“Oh!!” she laughs and nods, “It’s certainly refreshing!”

I think she’s done talking about her food until she looks at me from the side and leans forward with her eyes half-closed.

“Not nearly as you, though.”

I’m refreshing?

“Heh...right.” I think about digging into my rubies as a distraction from this freak show, but I’m trying to change my approach to everything. I have to hit this head-on while I still can.

I sigh and try my best to look at her without losing focus.

“Are you okay?”

She laughs, of course.

“Well, what kind of a question is that? We’re having dinner together, are we not?”

“Yeah, but...you’re being weird.” I don’t even try to put it lightly.

“Oh, stop it!” she waves at me and looks away, “You’re the weird one!”

She’s acting like this is some kind of compliment.

“No, like...you’re not the same.”

She looks above my head and smiles. I think she’s reminiscing or something.

“You’re right, Spikey Wikey.”

“Wait...really?”

“I never put it to thought until now, really, but you’re absolutely right.” she finally looks back to me and shrugs, “I know I dismissed your advances in the past, and I really am sorry for that. Something just sparked within me, I suppose. I don’t know why I never gave you a chance.”

Ugh, she’s doing that thing again. I can’t tell if it’s the real Rarity talking or not. She did this same thing at her house, back when we were about to look for the Elements with the girls.

Back then, I fell for it. But now, I know it’s just Discord pulling strings. She keeps looking over my head before she talks. I feel like she’s reading from cue cards.

This feels like a stage. It’s all too much to just hide behind the curtains. I finally have Rarity all for myself and it feels so wrong.

“Spike...?”

“I need to go.”

________________________________________________

I step into the library and I can hear ponies talking. It sounds like Twilight and Featherweight.

“No. No more snacks. It’s time for bed.”

“Awww, but I’m not even tired!”

This happens all the time. Featherweight forgets that we’re his family now and feels like he knows everything.

“I don’t want to hear it. I’m not having this talk with you every night-”

“SPIKE’S HOME!!!” Featherweight flies past Twilight and starts hovering behind me as I head for the stairs.

“Oh...hey, Spike.” Twilight tries to muster up a smile. I can tell she’s tired.

“Hey.” I drag my feet and walk upstairs. I remember when I first brought Featherweight home from Canterlot. It was after the crown fell from the sky. He followed me all the way to the library. I asked him if he had a place to stay and he said he didn’t. Nopony really talked about it after that. I guess we just assumed he didn’t have a family.

Either way, Twilight said she would help in any way she could.

“Spike, wait up!!”

That’s Featherweight. I think Twilight just waits for me to get home so that he’ll finally go to bed. He won’t do it unless I do it first. It’s like I’m his big brother. Everything I do is cool or something.

“Spike, where’d ya go!? You were gone all day and Twilight wouldn’t tell me and-”

“Had a date with Rarity.” I open the door to our room and stagger inside.

“Oooooohhh, a date?”

“Yeah.” I fall on my bed.

“Did you guys...”

He stops.

“You know...didja kiss?”

“No.”

“Good! That’s how you get sick!”

“Oh.”

“Wanna know how I know?”

“Sure, Featherweight.”

“I just do!”

“You’re a genius.” I roll over and slide an arm under my pillow. He doesn’t understand what I just went through. It was like I could see her trapped inside somepony dressed as Rarity. What if the spell is actually really scary on her side? Like, what if she’s trying to fight and break free?

“It sounds as though our little drake is finally seeing through the cracks.”

That’s Discord.

“AHHHH! IT’S THE BOGEYPONY!”

That’s Featherweight.

“GET AWAY!”

Wait...Discord’s showing up now?

In front of another pony?

I spring up and look over to where I heard Featherweight screaming. It looks like Discord really is here, and he’s got himself wrapped around the little pony so that he can’t scream anymore.

Just in time, too, because I can hear Twilight’s hoofsteps coming up the stairs. They get louder until she stops just outside our door. Luckily, we’re all pretty hidden in the dark because the lights are off. I don’t think she’s planning on coming inside, though. She’s probably just listening to check on us.

I use this moment of silence to glance at the other two in the room. Featherweight’s thrashing all over the place and Discord’s managing to keep him held in place. That’s when the hoofsteps start up again, but they get farther away and fainter. The coast is clear, I guess. I hop out of my bed and scurry over to the power struggle. Discord chuckles when he sees the look on my face.

“He’s lucky that I detest the taste of spoiled brats.”

Featherweight keeps trying to scream, but the only thing that comes out is a bunch of muffled sounds. After what Discord just said, he does kind of look like a snake’s prey.

“It’s okay.” I whisper and hold up my claws, “It’s just Discord.”

“MMPH?!”

I guess that doesn’t help the situation. The spirit of chaos doesn’t exactly have the best reputation.

“I know, I know. Just...relax.”

He finally stops wriggling and his eyes dart back and forth for something to happen. Discord coughs into his talon.

“Make sure he knows not to flap that mouth when I release him.”

I take a step forward, I grab onto Discord’s long tail that’s keeping the little guy quiet, and then I bring my head close to Featherweight so that we can see eye-to-eye.

“Look, you heard him. Just be quiet for a second. He’s a friend of ours. Now, we’re gonna let you go...but don’t scream. Got it?” I wait for a response before I give Discord the OK.

Featherweight just nods slowly, so I do the same to Discord, and then he slithers away from both of us. The little pony plops onto the floor and gasps like he’s been underwater for too long. I kind of expect him to just yell his head off anyway, but he’s actually following through. He still looks scared, though.

I decide to sit next to him and lay an arm around him.

“See? Nothing bad’s gonna happen.”

Featherweight tries to stop shivering while he turns to Discord. The draconequus is lounging on my bed.

“Why's he here?” Featherweight’s little voice finally pipes up.

I have to groan.

“It’s a really long story. He’s just...uh...”

Discord holds his lion paw in front of him and admires his claws. He decides that this is the right time to chime in.

“Simply providing tips for obtaining true love...” he says that last part like it’s something you tell your kids before they go to sleep.

“Huh?” Featherweight’s still too young to follow along. To him, love is just a sloppy wet one that gives you cooties. So I try to explain it in words he'll understand.

“He wants to help me kiss Rarity.”

“What!? EWWWwwwww!!” he scrambles away and dives for a corner of the room, “Why d’you wanna do that?”

I sit and think about that.

It doesn’t take long.

It’s really simple.

“I love her.”

“So?” Featherweight snaps back, “Just be friends!”

I laugh a little. I wish it could be that easy.

“Yeah, I guess that’d make everything easier.”

“How?”

“That’s why I stole the Elements. Discord wanted them so he could help me.”

“That just makes him a bad guy! Don’t listen to him!”

“He’s been reformed, though.” I look back at Discord and shrug. He just winks.

“Well...” Featherweight lowers his voice, “...he’s still scary.”

Discord tugs at his beard.

“Not nearly as scary as what’s going through Spikey Wikey’s head right now.”

And now I know why he’s here, so I grunt and wave in all directions.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m not happy. I don’t like seeing Rarity hypnotized, blah, blah.”

That causes him to giggle.

“You really have mastered the art of downplaying serious matters.”

I stand up and point at his ugly face.

“Yeah, and you’re the master of calling me names that I hate!” I think I just aged backwards for a minute there.

“I thought you liked it.” his smile tells me that he knows the answer.

“When Rarity says it.” I fold my arms.

“Does Twilight know he’s here?” Featherweight feels brave enough to approach us now.

“No, and you can’t tell her.” I kneel down to his level so I can get this drilled into his dumb little brain, “This is a big secret, okay? Nopony knows but you and me.”

“But...” he stops to think about his words, “...are we bad guys too?”

“No.” I stand up and look at Discord. He’s been surprisingly quiet tonight, “We just can’t let anypony know. They might think we are the bad guys.”

“It’s quite alright, little photographer.” Discord’s hovering around us now ,”I simply popped in to clear up this fabrication that Spikey Wikey has created for himself. He should be happy to know that he hasn't quite lost his marbles yet.”

Featherweight looks confused, but I know what he’s talking about. Ever since Discord first came to me after Rarity’s black hair accident, I’ve been thinking that I’m insane. Until tonight, I thought that maybe I was just imagining Discord. Now I have proof that he’s real.

“Yes, indeed. Mr. Spike, here, has been losing sleep. I must say that his tears made me rather uncomfortable. I could only bear witness for so long.”

“You were crying...?” Featherweight’s asking about all the times I would roll around in bed and sniff all night, “You said it was just a runny nose.”

Discord tries to contain his laughter.

“I suppose that runny nose lasted for weeks, and I suppose you thought nothing of it.”

“But...” the little pony doesn’t know what else to say. I’m sure he feels like he’s out of his element. Everything is always too much to take in when Discord’s around.

Featherweight waddles up to me and gives me a weak hug.

“You’re not crazy, Mr. Spike.” he says this with his face buried in my scales. I appreciate it, but I don’t feel really good. My belly’s starting to ache and I feel fire erupting in my throat. It’s just like that night with Rarity again.

“Get back!” I push Featherweight aside and turn around so I’m not facing anypony. I step over to a wall and lay a claw on it for support. Okay, it’s getting worse. I thinking I’m gonna throw up.

“Oh, it’s finally happening.” Discord floats behind me, “This is also why I came. I couldn’t possibly miss out on this reaction.”

Before I can even think about what he’s talking about, I let out a fiery, green belch. A scroll animates itself into the air and then drops to the floor. I clasp my mouth with both claws and just stare at the scroll. I’m sure my eyes have never been wider.

Discord’s snickering.

My claws are starting to tremble. They feel tingly and numb.

This doesn’t make any sense.

She’s supposed to be dead.

She can’t just send me letters after I saw them bury her.

It’s not right.

I just want Rarity to like me.

No spells or deals with Discord.

I don’t want to get involved with murder and ghosts.

“Read it!” Featherweight chirps. I don’t think he sees the whole picture. He’s just excited to see letters poof from thin air.

“Yes, Spike. Read it. The suspense is killing us.” Discord needs to get the last word as I bend down and pick up the scroll. I untie the gold ribbon and unroll the letter. It’s not a very long message. It’s even worse. It’s short and not at all sweet.

RETURN MY CROWN AT ONCE.

- PRINCESS CELESTIA

“What’s it say?” Featherweight is still just as chipper.

I can’t feel my toes.