Day 6,586 in Equestria. Horny as hell. Go to the library. Every pony in the world is there for some reason. Not desperate enough to fuck a horse.

Grab Spike from the crowd. Fuck his dickhole like a bagina. Everyone watching in horror. Feel sauce drip from your pocket.

"DON'T JUDGE ME!"

Ejaculate spaghetti into Spike's cock. Blast him through roof and into orbit. Punch Rarity as you walk out like a boss. FUCK Rarity.
Today was a good day.

Author's Note

This was actually one of the first things I ever wrote for AiE, ever, before I even had a name. I found it later and added the "Today was a good day", hence why it's so high on this list.
I actually have a hilarious narration done by PaleNarrator.