Day 999,111 in Equestria. Fluttershy's constant rape attempts have put you off dating ponies, but you've been getting lonely, and maybe being with one will finally show Fluttershy you're not interested. You stop to pick up some flowers before you meet Flitter, your date, at a restaurant. There she is, now!

You smile, and sit down across from her. Before you can say a word, an explosion tears through the restaurant. When smoke clears, you find half the flesh on your face missing, and Flitter's decapitated head lying in your lap. As you get up to run into the screaming crowd, several more explosions go off. There are bodies and fires everywhere.

"Psst, Anon!"

You look up to see Fluttershy standing around a corner.

"Is domestic terrorism your fetish?"

You try your best to report her for the crime, but Celestia won't hear it. An Element of Harmony would never harm innocent citizens of the Empire. You're thrown into the prison for defamation. You hang yourself with your shoelaces that very night.

Today was a bad day.

Author's Note

Just a note, this was written months before the Boston bombings. It's not meant to represent or comment on any specific events, recent or otherwise.