Rage of the Cage

Nicolas Cage was lonely, very lonely. So lonely that he could put a wig on his weewee and pretend it's a dude. One day, he went to a farm. There, he saw a pony with an hourglass on its flank. He tried to get its attention by inserting his fist into the pony's asshole. The pony got startled and kicked Cage in the nuts. It then ran. However, Nic's hand was still stuck in its butt and, therefore, was dragging the Cage around. He then got into a blue police box that was behind the barn. "Oh boy!", said Cage, “It’s bigger on the inside”. “Take your hand out of my anus now or you will regret it!”, said the pony. Nicolas laughed. The animal then kicked Cage, projecting him against the wall. “Now, time for your punishment!”, it said. The pony bit Nicolas’ wiener and threw it away. However, the penis grew back, just like a lizard’s tail. “Oh my God!”, said the pony, “You must be the Chosen One!”. Nicolas just stood there confused, his new dick fully erected. “I am Doctor Whooves, and this is my TARDIS. It stands for The Anuses Run Deliberately In Space”. With Cage still staring at him, he added “I am a time traveler from Equestria. Stay here and everything will be explained.”