*Static*

"We have just received word the President has signed off with the orders to launch a random attack-I mean preemptive strike against the Royalist nation of Equestria. This comes after multiple reports over the last few weeks of The dictator, Princess Celestia, using small amounts of undefined chemical weapons against their citizens.
Dictator Celestia had released a statement earlier today that the "chemical weapons" were just pesticides to ward off the emerald ash bore. However, President Obama has taken word from John McCain that she is probably lying, and has issued an executive order to begin invading, I mean "bringing about the love of democracy" Equestria."
*Click*
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