Chapter 1:

“You know… I used to have an entirely different perspective of the world.” I said to my fluffy little friend, Mr. Teddims… don’t judge me, “Near the start of Discord’s reign I was actually pretty excited, everything seemed so fun, but, pretty quickly, it got really annoying.” I said and then I turned back to face Mr. Teddims, and saw Discord’s face replacing Teddims’ adorable face, this made me fall off my hooves and let out a foalish squeal of horror.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quiet catch that… Could you start over again?” He said, giving me a big innocent smile. I stammered around with my words for a while, I mean, it’s hard to just recover from… from that!

“I didn’t know my beauty alone could make ponies end up with a loss for words.” He said and chuckled slightly, I just stood up and snorted, Discord has been messing with me lately.

“I thought you were done messing with me Discord.” I said, “It’s already been a week.” Discord has this thing where he draws names from a goofy hat to see who he gets to torment- sorry, I mean, ‘get to know’ for a week.

“You know, you’re making a pretty good point…” Discord said poofing next to me and he pulled out a calendar. “I added three extra days to the jingleberry, odd numbers are so weird.” He said, smiling as I just sighed, having to deal with three more days of this torture.

“So what do you have planned for today Discord, is it going to rain custard? Or how about instead of water coming out of my bathtub’s fossett it’ll be chocolate pudding? Or maybe, just maybe, you’re going to turn the Mayor’s mane into a giant purple monkey?” I asked, not looking at Discord as I walked into the kitchen to make some breakfast.

“I don’t believe in plans, they’re so lame because you already know what’s going to happen near the end, I prefer to adlib.” He said, floating around me as I had just sighed.

“Then how do you explain what you did to Twilight and her friend’s?” I asked, finding nothing in my kitchen I decided to head for the outside world (ew), and he just shrugged.

“I dunno.” He said and just continued to float around my head.

“How do you not know what you did?” I asked, confused by Discord.

“Magic.” He said then snorted twice, I just shook my head and exited my house and into the morning air.

“Like the changes I’ve made since yesterday?” Discord asked then swooped in front of me and presented the world behind him, showing a mayonnaise road, several bread houses, crouton clouds, and lastly a purple sky with green polka-dots. “Delightful isn’t it?” He asked me.

“Eh, you’ve done better.” I said and trotted down the street heading in no specific direction since the layout of the streets change every day, hoping I would end up at Sugar Cube Corner.

“Oh come on! I tried really hard with this one. I mean, just look, the street is made of mayonnaise, and not regular mayonnaise, low fat mayonnaise!” He said and swooped one of his talons into the street and held up the mayo on his claw to me so I could see what he was talking about. “Just look at the coloring!”

“I don’t see a difference.” I said and trotted past Discord, walking on the butter sidewalk, getting my hooves all slippery and making them feel weird, but it was better than walking through the mayonnaise and end up having my hooves feel really weird.

“How can you not see the difference, what are you, BLIND!?” He said as he grabbed my ears and pulled his head close to mine, his eyes literally bulging out of his head.

“Uh… No, at least I don’t think so.” I said and trotted past Discord again, who just grumbled as he hovered alongside me.

“So where are you going anyways?” Discord asked as he began thinking up of shenanigans to put me into.

“Sugar-Cube corner.” I said and nearly slipped on the butter sidewalk, hardly able to catch myself and this made Discord chuckle a bit.

“Well you’re heading the wrong way, I moved it over’dere!” Discord said and got this really weird face that looked like a hairless monkey except for a mustache and a green hat with a L on it. I got a bit creeped out by this but looked at where he pointed and saw the building that contains delectable sweets floating upside-down in the sky, the building was also surrounded by random rubble and debris.

“Discord, you should really give up your dreams of being an urban-planner.” I said and trotted towards the new staircase leading up to the floating building.

“H-how could you say that!?” Discord said, a few tears flowing from his eyes, as he was holding a map of Ponyville upside down and was wearing a hard-hat that was tilted to the side. I ignored this and continued to the staircase, having to pass through a field of candy-canes and chocolate pudding. I finally began the ascent up to the Cake’s business.

“You still haven’t answered me.” Discord said, obviously grumpy.

“Because I don’t want to.” I said, a bit annoyed.

“Why?” ‘Oh no.’ I thought as I saw the signs of a terrible storm of annoyance is coming.

“Why?” ‘Please Celestia no.’ I thought with dread as I shudder, just accepting the storm is coming, and just like that, I saw discord’s jaw lower and a low grumble sounding out from inside.

“Please… No.” I pleaded, but to no avail, because just as I asked my question, I got an answer of a thousand why’s materializing and shooting out of his mouth and at me as I could hear him say all the why’s with about a half second delay between each one. He was asking the question so loudly I could feel my brain stem shaking in my skull and down my spine; I had put my hooves over my ears after being blasted back by his shouts, fruitlessly trying to block the sound out. “PLEASE! FOR THE LOVE OF LUNA, STOP!” I yelled to Discord, but my words were drowned out by Discord’s visible sound-waves. ‘ I guess I have to shut him up myself.’ I thought to myself, barely even able to hear it, as I crawled my way to Discord, using shear willpower to push myself there. As soon as I got to him I slammed my hooves onto his muzzle to literally shut his mouth. Discord looked at me and then smiled and teleported behind me.

“Are you going to finally answer my question?” Discord asked after putting up that huge fit over the smallest thing EVER!

“YES, FINE! I’ll answer your stupid question. I said that because you have bad ideas for city lay-outs.” I said, annoyed beyond annoyance by Discord’s antics.

“Oh okay.” Discord said and floated into the building, and I sighed and followed behind him, going inside to see that even though the outside of the building is upside-down, besides a new balcony that kept ponies from falling off and allowed them entrance, the inside of the building was completely right-side up.

“Hello Mrs. Cake.” I said, trying to hide my annoyance of Discord.

“Hello.” She said, a bit nervous because Discord was there, I understood this so I hurried my business with her so that Discord wouldn’t have a chance to mess with Mrs. Cake. As I was trotting away with a muffin and two cupcakes, Discord turned Mrs. Cake’s hair into a giant grass hopper, which made Mrs. Cake scream in terror and run around the building, making Discord laugh hysterically and making me even more annoyed.

“Oh… That was priceless!” Discord said, wiping away a tear of laugher… Like a legitimate tear of laughter, the tear itself was laughing, I just shook my head as I reached the bottom of the stairs. Eventually I reached my house, experiencing a few more annoying things Discord would do to publically humiliate me, but with my brisk pace I never really got embarrassed.

“So, why were you in such a hurry to get to this dump?” Discord asked, floating in the corner as I emptied the contents of the bag I had.

“What do you think?” I asked, pointing to my muffin and cupcakes.

“Mediocre sweets?” He asked as I sighed and began eating the cupcakes, letting my eyes close and my mind wonder off, relishing in the sweet taste of the cupcakes. I finish the cupcakes slowly and then look at my muffin with a predatory gaze, and slowly, ever so slowly undressed the muffin of its uncomfortable, restricting, wrapper, my heart rate quickens as I pick up the muffin in my telekinetic grasp, bringing it closely to my muzzle. “You must really like muffins.” Discord says, but it gets drowned out as I ignore him as I slowly take a bite out of my muffin, but, before I could actually get to taste the delicious, succulent muffin, Discord changed it into a cube of mud. This… This was the last straw, I opened my eyes and turned to Discord, letting my pent up rage from the week, burst from the emotional dam I had but up.

“DISCORD!” Discord’s face went from one of laughter and happiness to one of curiosity.

“Yes?” He asked innocently. I didn’t give him a verbal answer, but a violent one, using my special talent of controlling the weather, pretty uncommon for a unicorn, I unleashed a bolt of lightning out from the sky above and through the house, striking Discord where he floats. Discord reacts in a cartoonish manner, spazzing a bit whilst his skeleton shows through his charred body. I watch as he crumples down to the floor and a feeling of relief and pride washes over me, but it was soon replaced by surprise as Discord’s body turned to ashes and reformed back to Discord as he laughed at my attempted homicide.

“Now, now, we don’t kill guest.” He said, placing a claw on the top of my head behind my horn, making my coat and mane turn a shade of grey as my vision blurred and a sudden wave of sadness overwhelmed me.

Author's Note

Sorry this took SO long, but only like five people will see this, anyways I've just had to catch up with school and *cough*procrastinate*cough* So anyways, hoped you liked it, and if you're a new reader and you did happen to like my story, drop a like and favorite if you want to, I mean it just keeps my moral up but it's your choice. I won't make any dead line for the next chapter, or expected date to when it should be published since I will probably not meet said deadline.