Like Sisters, Probably

“What the hell are you two doing?” demanded Lightning Dust.

“Pretty sure that’s absolutely none of your business,” I said, matching her tone. I wasn’t going to let her get a single step up on me, though I was having a hard time putting thoughts together because of how mad I was that she was there.

Dash just stood there, looking like she was going to do nothing useful about it. “Can we at least have a seat instead of randomly shouting things at each other?” she said as if that would help.

“Neither of us are shouting,” snapped Dust, and then turned back to me. “And it’s definitely my business. I’m closer to Dash than anyone.”

“Yeah right—closer than her girlfriend who lives with her?”

“She lives here, like, a week out of the month during the season.” The corner of her mouth curled up. “You’re a part-timer, at best.”

“Except I’m the one who has sex with her,” I said as if I didn’t really care about the argument.

“Pff, I’m not even gonna touch that one. Out of the two of us, who sees her the most?”

“Guys, I’m right here,” said Dash, sounding tired.

“Just shut up Dash. You don't get a say in this,” said Dust.

“I don't get a say in this?” Dash threw her hooves up. “Then you know what? Buck it. Buck you. You two figure it out, I’m getting a drink.”

“You just can’t deal with the fact that Dash chose me over you, can you?” I said, diving right back into it.

“Maybe I could accept it if that’s what happened, which it’s not.”

“Uh, excuse me? I’m her girlfriend.”

Lightning Dust raised an eyebrow. “What, this? Here? You’re like... a pet.”

“Then why the hell did you rush all the way over here?” I flicked my head over at Dash. “Come to make sure she’s feeding and watering me regularly?”

“I came because I’m worried Dash’s completely lost her mind! Like, what the hell is up with this?” she said, gesturing mostly at me.

“Again, why do you even care? This doesn’t even affect you. It’s not like you see her any less, that’s friggin clear as day. Dash is a grown-ass adult and so am I—we can make our own grown-ass decisions.”

“It affects me because—argh!” Dust threw her hoof up in the air. “You’re just obsessed with her! This isn’t a real thing!”

“Yeah, alright, I’m obsessed with her, I’ll admit it. But it’s way more than that—what the hell do you know about us?” I flared my wings. “And it’s not like you’re any less obsessed with her as I am.”

“I’m not obsessed with her! I’m her friend. We’re on the same level—not like this owner-pet thing here.”

“You're just jealous because you had had your chance with her and totally blew it! Well you know what? She's with me now and not you!"

"What the hell is—she's not just something you won! You're not even serious about this!"

"I totally am! Dash is super important to me! I've, like, always been in love with her, since way back!"

"So you're living out your silly fillyhood crush—I'm sure that'll last."

"It's going to! You two are over! You were over a long time ago! It's me and Dash now!"

"Yeah, well it's not over for me!"

No one said anything for a moment. Dash looked over at us.

"Uh... what?" I said, totally derailed.

She looked for the side. "You heard me."

"You mean..." Dash started, from where she was on the couch.

"Yeah."

“Ha!” I said jumping in the air. “I knew it!”

Dash blinked. “Y-you’re still in love with me?”

I knew it. I had known it since way back. Just hearing about the two of them, how Dust acted, I knew it.

"Yeah, I'm still in love with you," said Lightning Dust.

And now Dash knew it too. I landed back down on the floor. I’d been right all along. But I didn’t feel good about it. Actually, I felt terrible. Like, yeah. Wow. Where the hell did that leave me?

“Lightning Dust...” said Dash, looking away.

“You’re seriously telling me you didn’t know,” Lightning Dust said. “This little skid who I’ve barely met figured it out and you didn’t.”

“We broke up a long time ago. I thought—”

“No, you broke up with me a long time ago. Because—you remember this, right?—you thought I wouldn’t be able to commit. Because there was a chance it wouldn’t work out, you bailed.”

I should’ve jumped on her moment of weakness and rubbed it in her face, but I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t think of anything to say. Lightning Dust was in love with Dash, and now Dash knew it too. Where the hell did that leave me?

“So I guess we’re doing this right now.” Dash got up and came over. “Sorry,” she said to me, “could you give us a minute? You two can go right back to yelling at each other when we're done.”

“Oh yeah, I get it,” I said. I spun around and stomped towards the the door. It was foalish, but whatever.

“You don’t have to leave leave—I meant just like a different room, or—”

“No, I’m outta here. I’m not sticking around for this shit.”

“Scootaloo...”

I felt backed into a corner all of a sudden. Having that yelling match with Dust had been almost fun, in a weird way, right until that point. I was suddenly feeling super insecure—things between me and Dash weren’t good. I’d being worrying that Dash was enjoying her time with Lightning Dust more than me, that I’d just become a chore when I wasn’t being her safety net.

And I’d been telling myself it wasn’t like that and I was just being paranoid—I’d been telling myself Lightning Dust wasn’t really in love with Dash. But she was. So where the hell did that leave me?

“Fine,” I said, turning to Dash. “Tell Dust to leave then. You see her every day—you can talk to her whenever! She bursts into our house and I’m the one leaving? Make her leave!”

“Yeah, that’s not bucking happening,” said Lightning Dust.

Dash put a hoof to her face. “Gah, whatever. Scootaloo, just give us a few minutes. Is that really asking that much?”

“You’re choosing her over me!” I yelled.

“That’s not what—”

“Yes it bucking is,” I kept on. “You’re choosing right now. Tell Dust to leave or I’m going.”

Lighting Dust just sat there while Dash kept saying nothing.

I was starting to panic a bit. Dash was supposed to instantly take my side, and she wasn’t. Like, I was her girlfriend. Yeah, I was making a big deal out of it, but I just wanted to hear her say she would choose me.

But then I looked at the two of them, in the same room, having, like, an entire conversation without actually saying anything while I looked at them—and I wasn’t even sure the conversation was about me. Lightning Dust actually was one of Dash’s closest friends. Though they were both in the Wonderbolts, it didn’t mean Dash was forced to spend so much time around her—she did because she liked being around Lightning Dust. That was the reason Dash spent so much time with her, and why Dash would get so pissed when I talked bad about Lightning Dust. I realized how obvious that was, and how amazing it was that I’d never properly understood that until right then.

“So that’s what’s happening?” I said after I’d had as much of their silent conversation I could take. “I’m just gonna get kicked out of my own house?”

“I said, that’s not what’s—” Dash started at the same time Lightning Dust said, “You’re damn right that’s what’s happening.”

Dash looked at her, then back to me. “L.D., stop. Scootaloo, no one’s getting kicked out, but that doesn’t mean I’m choosing L.D. over you.”

“But it means you might,” I shot back.

“No, I mean...” She sighed.

“Why can’t you just say you pick me over her?” I demanded.

“Because kicking L.D. out right now, after she flew all the way from Cloudsdale and dropped that bomb, would piss her right off. And you know what? She’s a really good friend of mine, and I don’t want to do that.”

“Meaning she does choose me over you,” said Lightning Dust.

“Lightning Dust,” said Dash, shooting a scowl at her. “Shut the buck up. Seriously.”

“Then say you’ll pick the skid over me, and I’ll stop,” said Dust.

“L.D., you’re my best friend and Scootaloo, you’re my girlfriend. Do I really have to choose between that?”

“Yes,” I said.

“Yeah,” said Lightning Dust. “Make a choice. Right now.”

We both looked at Dash, totally on the same page.

Dash looked between the two of us. “No, I’m not doing that. You two are being bucking asses, I don’t want to even look at either of you right now. Is there a bucking third option? My tortoise. I pick my tortoise over you two.”

“Come on Dash!” I said.

“Scootaloo, just... give us a minute.”

“What?” I said.

“Seriously, just one minute.”

“Are you actually serious?”

Dash rubbed her hoof in her own face. “Please, Scootaloo.”

“You want me to leave?”

“Just... yes. Just for a minute. Please.”

I looked at her, and refused to look at Dust. She wasn’t going to say anything else.

“Fine. I’m out of here. And don’t bucking wait up for me,” I said, and left. I kept hoping Dash would stop me or follow me or something, but she didn’t.

It all went by so fast I almost had no idea what the buck happened. I was still running on turbo from seeing Lightning Dust’s stupid face that I couldn’t make sense of anything. I really started to panic then. Everything felt like it was falling to pieces, but at the same time, everything changing brought a crazy kind of release. For just a moment I wasn’t trapped. I was flying off the handle, but I wasn’t stuck. Free as in free falling.

I went to Sweetie’s place, of course.

I knocked, but she wasn’t there. I checked under the mat, and sure as shit, there was the extra key. I was still losing my mind a bit, but hanging around that old place of mine made me feel kind of comfortable, despite all that. It was about an hour or so before Sweetie came back. To pass the time I dug up some old comics, and looked through them without even really reading them.

“Welcome back,” I said when Sweetie came in the door, like she always used to back when I would come home to find her already there.

“Hi again,” she said, coming in. “What’s up?”

She asked it like she thought something was probably up, which there was.

“Um... lots of stuff. I don’t really want to talk about it right now. Can I stay here again tonight?”

“Oh,” she said. “Okay.”

She walked over to the couch, and I jumped up.

“I’ll make supper,” I said. “Here, just sit or whatever. I’ll make supper.”

“I was just about to go grocery shopping. There’s not a lot here.”

“It’s cool, I’m sure I’ll figure something out.”

She just looked at me, but did sit down, so I went into the kitchen.

“You want me to help?” she asked.

“No, it’s fine,” I said. “I got it.”

There really wasn’t much to work with, but I’d be able to manage. I started chopping vegetables.

“I think me and Dash broke up,” I said.

“What?!” shouted Sweetie Belle, jumping up.

“Well, not really. Maybe we’re going to. Maybe we should. I don’t know. Anyway, yeah.”

“Are... you okay?”

“Mmm.... probably. Maybe. I really don’t know.”

“What happened?” She came over to where I was. I kept chopping.

“We had a fight. Then Dust was there, too.”

“Lightning Dust? At your house?”

“Yeah. And it turns out she's totally in love with Dash still, surprising no one except Dash.”

“You sure?”

“Yep. She kind of declared her love or whatever. And then I think Dash chose her over me. I mean, I kind of forced her into it, but I’m pretty sure it still happened. I mean, I got kicked out of my own house—that happened for sure.”

“Scootaloo, I’m really sorry to hear it. But are you sure that’s exactly how it went? Even if you were the one to leave, I can't see Dash dumping you for Lightning Dust all of a sudden. Besides, you told me she made it clear to Lightning Dust that they weren't ever again going to—”

“Yeah, I know. But don’t worry about it. I don’t know if I even care right now. Meh. I don’t know. Here, cut this pepper since you’re here.”

She chopped beside me for a moment, and leaned up against me. For support, or whatever, I guess. I flinched away from her. She didn’t say anything. It didn’t bother me, that she had been touching me, it was just... I don’t know. It really didn’t bother me, and that was the problem.

In any case, I think I was coming down from that adrenaline burst from seeing Dust, or whatever, and chopping vegetables suddenly seemed really hard. I set the knife down, and just looked at it. I was kind of crashing hard.

“I’m actually going to sit down for a bit,” I said.

“Okay,” said Sweetie Belle.

She sort of kept on making supper. She didn’t ask what I had been trying to make or what to do next or anything, she just kept going from there. I felt like an idiot and a weirdo but I didn’t mind being those things around Sweetie Belle. I hoped she still didn’t mind me being like that around her.

After what was probably a while but felt like just a moment she said, “Alright, supper’s ready.”

“Cool, thanks,” I said.

I didn’t really move, and she brought two plates over and we ate at the coffee table, sitting at the couch.

I leaned over a little bit, hesitantly, until I was just barely up against Sweetie.

“That was really good. I’m surprised,” I said.

“Yeah. I told you I learned how to cook a bit,” she said.

“Yeah,” I said. “You’ve... been better without me around, hey?”

Sweetie didn’t say anything.

“I’m not trying to be.... I don’t know,” I said. “I just, you know, realized that.”

“I want you to be a part of my life, still,” said Sweetie. “It’s just... it’s good I got that time away from you. I’m good now. Things are good for me now.”

“I think.... things aren’t good for me, with that time away from you,” I said.

“Oh.”

“Yeah. I’m better around you.”

I sort of moved so I was on my side, getting closer to her. I put my head on her shoulder. It felt nice, which was a big deal for me just then. But I knew as soon as I did it, it was a problem.

“Scootaloo,” she said.

“What?” I asked.

“Um... sorry, but please don’t.”

“Don’t what?”

“I’m over you... but not that much. You know that. We just had this conversation yesterday.”

“What do you mean?” I was pretty sure that conversation happened a million years ago, not the day before.

“I think you know.”

I did. I sat back up, but slumped down. I wasn’t touching her anymore.

“I mean it though,” I said.

“Stop.”

“No, I really mean it. It’s best around you. I figured that out.”

“You’re just messed up from what’s happening with Rainbow Dash.”

“Yeah. But it’s still true.”

“If you say so.”

“So can I stay here?”

“Yes.”

“Can you stay here, too?”

“Okay. But you’re on the couch.”

“I want to stay in your bed.”

“Then I’ll go on the couch.”

“I want to stay in whatever has you in it.”

“Seriously Scootaloo, stop,” Sweetie said, getting up from the couch and looking away.

“I mean, just sleeping in the same bed,” I said. “We’ve done that before.”

“You know it’s different now. I know you’re going through alot right now, and I want to support you, but I need you to stop this. Or else I’ll seriously think I have a chance with you after all this.”

“Maybe you do.”

I wasn’t keeping it together at all. Things were just coming out of my mouth—and what was crazier was that I totally meant them. Or I least I felt them.

Then Sweetie Belle was close to me. She had moved in a blink.

“Last chance,” she said. There was an intensity to her all of a sudden. Her mane had fallen forwards into her face a bit. I saw I was pulling down everything she had built up to get over me and then some.

“Leave right now,” she said in the same way, her face set in a way I rarely saw it. And she said it with a firmness to her voice that was missing any of the easy sort of bounce that was usually there. “Go stay with one of your work friends or at your parents’ or anywhere that’s not here, and tomorrow you can patch things up with Dash, and everything will be like it was and be completely fine.”

I thought about the way things were, with Dash and everything—and not just right then, but how they’d been for a while. I looked at Sweetie Belle in front of me, at her mane falling down over eyes, and what her mane didn’t quite hide in them. I didn’t want things to be the way they were. Things were changing like they hadn’t in what felt like ages. If it stopped now, I would go back to that spot where I was just existing.

I couldn’t go back to that.

“I’m not leaving,” I said.

Her forelegs were on the cushions to either side of me, her face an inch in front of mine. I could feel her breath on my mouth which I’d left open just a bit.

“Buck it all Scootaloo,” she said with too much air behind the words. “You’re right, I am better without you around.”

“You definitely are,” I said.

She put her lips against mine. She did it softly, which I wasn’t expecting. She put her hooves around me, and despite the situation, despite everything—no, buck everything—it was like she was holding me and keeping me from everything. I thought it was going to feel like she was claiming me as her own, or something wild like that, which is probably what I would’ve been like in her position, honestly. But it wasn’t.

She kissed the side of my face and my neck, slowly, quietly. I relaxed—the tension flowed out of me for about the first time in a long time. Months, probably. It shouldn’t have felt like that, I remember thinking. Not with everything that had happened. Not with what this meant.

But it did, and I let myself go—giving myself over to her comfortable warmth.