Our Adventures and Mis-Adventures in Equestria

[K]=Kevin/Suicide's POV

[M]=My/Fatman's POV

Prologue: [M]

"So you leaving tomorrow huh Suicide?" "Yeh, kinda sucks but Ya know only paid to stay a week" ....Nods.... "So Suicide what should we do on your last day here" "I dunno.....WAIT, We should totally go drinking" *Four hours and ..... Celestia knows how many drinks later* "H.Hheyy llettsss go for a walk yah." *all i get is a grunt in response* "Dude where are we going." *le Grunt a la suicide* "TO THE WOODS IT IS THEN, ALLONS-Y"

*I lost track of how many hours we were out here, and I've sobered up some suicide on the other hand who doesn't know the meaning of the word moderation, has drunk himself into quite a stupor.....dumbass* "SOOOO.... where the fuck are we and why did i think this was a good idea?" "*grunt* I..II'm gonna sit here Fatman" "Well while you do that I'm gonna try to find a way outta here k?" *grunt* *facepalm a la Fatman*

Several minutes later....... "All right dude I'm back." .....is he asleep.... I think to myself. ..........OBNOXIOUS SNORING LIKE A BOSS...... "yep he's asleep, well guess were camping here tonight." So i sit down on a tree, and watch the stars.... and soon enough the peaceful bliss of sleep takes over me.

".......Gah.....Where am I?" I say as I look around to catch my bearings, and notice that everything's a bit more colorful than it was the previous night (not exactly the best for a hangover), ......I just remembered the walk in the woods, getting lost, and us passing out....well mainly Suicide passing out....., but why do the trees look differe..... O SHIT SUICIDE... whew there he is. "Suicide get up fucker!"..... "but i dun wanna go to school" *facepalm* "GET UP!!" I end yelling out of annoyance as i toss a rock at his head .....i think it was a rock..... *snort* "Wuh-where are we," said suicide obviously still drowsy, "Dude get the fuck up we passed out in the woods on the way back to the house" "Hey! Quit screaming asshole!" apparently he thinks I'm screaming, "That's not screaming, THIS IS SCREAMING, NOW GET THE HELL UP AND HELP ME LOOK AROUND!" that oughtta show him.

(After a few minutes of trekking through the woods) "DUDE." .....argh, what now "What's up Suicide?" "Dude we need to get back to the house, so I don't miss my..... *OOF*, dude what the fuck, why did you sto....." "LOOOOOKKK." I say in sheer awe, "DUDE Fatman, do you see what i see?" ".......yuh....." "You know where we are right Fatman" ".....yuh...." "Are you ok?" ".....yuh......" "*facepalm* Yep he's broken" says suicide as he drags my sorry ass back to our tree. (EPIC BATMAN TRANSITION Back at the tree) "Fatman are we really in equestria" " .....yuh....." "....... *pulls random bucket of water out of nowhere* .......What the hell, where the hell did that come from?" Suicide says with a shrug "Oh well" *le splash* "SNAP OUT OF IT!" "Dude we're in equestria" I say nonchalant just realizing i am now soaking wet and freezing my balls off. "SOOOO.... Fatman what the hell we gonna do now." "I don't know about you but i'm gonna go find and hug the hell outta Fluttershy." "Dude not yet, I don't think we should introduce ourselves yet, cause we don't know how they'll react." "Good point" 'for once'.

[K]

"I say we make us a camp here for now" I suggest "You do that I'm goin to find something edible and gather some supplies" Fatman says as his stomach rumbles. "Aight just be careful and don't be seen by any one (or pony?)" I say with a chuckle 'after all Fatman isn't called 'fat'man cause he isn't fat *snicker*' "I'll be back soon, Bear Grylls ain't got shit on me." Fatman says walking off into the woods. I laugh getting to work on a campsite 'He sure hates that guy' I look around getting a feel for the surrounding area and I notice a HUGE hollowed out log. Thinking back to all the survival shows I've watched over the years the one thing they always say is look for a natural shelter. "This might work" I say looking inside, "Me and Fatman should be able to fit in here comfortably. Just need to seal off one end to keep out the wind and we got us a liveable log." I say to myself with a chuckle. "I guess that's all that's left to do is wait for Fatman to get back with some grub" I say sitting down against a tree and dozing off.

[M]

"Hmm.. I wonder what's edible around here" I think out loud to myself as I spot some delectable looking berries on a bush a few feet away from me. Throwing caution to the wind, and letting my stomach take over, I pick a few of the berries and eat them. "O. MY. GOD. these are the best tasting berries I've ever tasted."(If you're wondering they tasted like a mix between dragon fruit, and pomegranate), so i grab the whole bush, of course not after nicking my self on a fallen branch. "SSSS......AAAAHHHHH........SSSSS.......AAAAHHHH." 'somewhere in the back of my mind I picture Suicide laughing his ass off at my fail.' I eventually get back up and start walking down a set direction rubbing my leg. About a few minutes of walking and some bitching about the pain in my leg, I notice that it had stopped bleeding but alas it's still open 'gonna need to cover that up later.' "OOF, What the fuck?" .....'now what the fuck did i walk into......OOOHHH.' "NO FRIGGIN' WAY, DUD.... O wait he's not here *facepalm* well at least we'll have something to eat that I don't think will kill us." towering before me was a peach tree full of perfectly ripe peaches. 'Well that's convenient .....OOF.... i guess that's even more convenient' I think as a peach falls out of the tree and bounces off my head and into my hand. "HOOT HOOT" 'hmm.... guess i should be getting back to camp now.' "Guess I should grab a few of them...... now which way was camp again?" *EPIC SNORING* "Eeyup, that way."

[K]

'Was talking to some of my brony friends about me being a brony and how much I LOVED MLP FiM and how awesome it would be to visit Equestria.' When all of a sudden it feels like a mac truck just hit me. I wake up and yell "DA HELL WAS THAT" not realizing Fatman had just tripped over me in the near pitch darkness. "What the hell fatty watch who your stepping on" I say somewhat irritated."Oh hey Suicide didn't see you there." Fatman says with a chuckle. "I was wondering what the fuck I tripped over." "Yea that would be me, thanks very much dick" I say still pissed. "You find anything to eat out there?" I asked with a rumbling stomach. "Yea I found these tasty berries and a peach tree i ran into." He responded "HAHA you ran into a tre...dude what did you do to your leg that looks nasty." I say somewhat concerned "Nah ain't that bad I'll be fine" he says with a smirk. "You should at least get it covered, don't want it to get infected, that would suck ass and hurt like hell" I say with a cringe. "Here use my hoodie it's too warm here for a sweatshirt anyways" I say throwing my sweatshirt to him, and he proceeds to wrap up the cut on his leg. "Need to find some water tomorrow and get that cleaned up good". I say with a mouthfull of berries. "Cha I know right" he responds biting into a peach. "Well I'm full, gonna try to get a fire goin to keep the critters away for the night" I say as I gather up some firewood. "Good idea, don't want a pack of timberwolves attacking us while we sleep." Fatman says as he picks up some firewood "That should be enough wood for now, you got a lighter dude?" I ask throwing the firewood on the ground. "Sure do" Fatman says pulling a lighter out of his pocket and tossing to me. Not long ofter a roaring fire was burning and I was starting to get tired. "Well I think its time for some sleep, we can work on this more tomorrow" "Agreed" Fatman says with a yawn.

[K]

*YAWN* 'gah that was a horrible ass sleep' I think to myself as I start to stir awake, and notice something is a miss. I sit there for a few minutes trying to wake up and thinking about what exactly looks wrong with this picture. "I'm gonna kill him when I find him." I say stumbling out of the log we decided to sleep in. I look around to notice something moving in the brush, so like a dumbass I go investigate 'Why am I going over here, could be anything over here ready to eat my dumbass' I very carefully fall through the brush to find suicide jumping at the peach tree, and making a complete idiot outta himself in the process. Suicide notices me and says "Well good morning there Princess how was your sleep," in which I respond/yawn back to him "Yeah, hardy har har smartass." "Well, I thought I would take the liberty of finding us some breakfast." he says with a grin. "You need some help with that shortstop" *trollface.jpg* "Yeh sure all I need you to do is jump once or twice and they should come raining down" ........ "touche" which I reply as I walk over and kick the tree once, but to no avail (I have failed the apple family) "Good job, Fatman, How's that working out for ya?" Suicide chuckles at me. "Pretty good, except my pride and my foot are a little hurt now" I say while rocking back and forth on the ground.

After a well needed breakfast of berries and peaches I look around and for once I feel somewhat relaxed. "So what now?" I hear Fatman ask with a sigh. "Dunno, think we should scout around a little more and see whats around" I reply "Maybe we should go look to see where the ponies are, ya know so we know where to avoid." Fatman says 'Oh hes so full of shit he stinks' "No you wanna just see a pony, not that I can blame you I do too, just don't know if it's a good idea," I reply "what if they see us?" "But I wanna see a pony now" Fatman says doing his best Applebloom impression *Sigh* "Fine but we needa be covert about it, got it?" I say trying to sound smart. "KAY Mr. Ninja" Fatman says with excitement and a hint of sarcasm. "Shall we get goin then Mr. Ninja?" "Yea yea" I reply rolling my eyes. "Lets get goin". I start looking around for a decent walking stick, trying to find one thats just right. "What the hell are you doing?" I hear Fatman ask impatiently. "I'm looking for a walking stick, my ankle is bad and I don't need to hurt it walking through these damn woods." I reply somewhat irritated. "AHA found one, alrighty then shall we get moving." As we trek off into the woods.

[M]

So an hour of trekking through the woods, and getting to know our surroundin...... ok I lied we are totally fucking lost. "Fatman I think we are lost" Suicide says with a hint of concern. "Nah I got dis, remember Bear Grylls ain't got a damn thing on me" I say a little to overconfident. "Whatever ya say dude, I'm not gonna argue" He replies obviously not convinced, "Just get us either back to camp or the hell out of these woods." "Dude chill out Suicide I'm positive I know what the hell I'm doing" Now starting to get frustrated myself. We carry on going back and forth with each other about different shit when I feel a slight burning in my leg, and feeling of wetness running down my leg. "God-damnit" I yell, "What?" he responds pausing our little argument, "My friggin' leg is starting to bleed again." I yell a little to loudly from irritation. "Dude shut the hell up with that yelling, someone is gonna hear us." Suicide says starting to get irritated with me. In which I start yelling and hollering even louder about it, (That's one of the things I hate is someone telling me what to do when I'm pissed off) and I start carrying on about how I don't give and fuck about being found. "Dude Fatman, seriously shut the hell up." I turn around to give him the stank-eye, when we both pause when we hear a very light whimper. "Duh, Fatman what was that?" "Uh-Oh" I say turning slowly, and right there cowering in front of me is my favorite yellow coated, pink maned, shy pegasus, Fluttershy. My first thought was somewhere between SQUEE and a D'awww, but all that managed to come out was a "uhuhuh, I love you" then I remember nothing but blackness.