Sweet childhood memories, sweet childhood memories,thought Dalton as he was continuously violated by Princess Celestia's tongue. It had easily been 10 minutes now and Dalton had suffered in silence and tried to be completely still; his Lower Lady Lover wouldn't remain flaccid, earning him about 12 bright red lash marks all over his body from the whip. He tried desperately to take his mind off sex and think of unarousing matters but it was to no avail, and as a result he was punished.

It was a mix of pain and pleasure for Dalton, and he only wanted to escape, since the Princess obviously had more in store. With a strangled cry he told the corrupted Sun Princess a suggestion.

"P... Princess, please! My nethers aren't worthy of your tongue's power! Release me and I'll be on my way," said a fatigued Dalton.

Celestia smiled and brandished the whip using magic, and the whip was engulfed in yellow magic as it cracked upon Dalton's left arm, causing him to wince in discomfort.

"One, it's Mistress Celestia for you. And two, talk again and I shall have to increase the punishment tenfold. Can't wait to see how that would turn out!" squealed Mistress Celestia in delight as she returned her tongue to its position, wrapping around Dalton's semi-hard frankfurter. She obviously had much prior experience with her tongue, as she guided her length of meaty, saliva coated roughness along Dalton's shaft, finding every nerve point on his gonads. She coated every lick with a generous helping of saliva, and Dalton found himself lost in ecstasy as the skillful tongue became a cosy coop for his raging rooster, which he struggled to keep down despite the feel of wet flesh on his hot meat.

"Just that... Prin-- I mean Mistress! My woody isn't stallion sized..." Dalton blurted out, bracing for the whip. But it never came. Instead, as he opened his eyes slowly, he noticed that the Mistress was off of his joystick and was now eyeing him with deranged eyes and a wide Chesire grin, too wide to be natural.

"Oooh! I've just been thinking of this day for millennia, where I could finally have a chance to seduce a human! It was so simple! Set up Discord, lower PonyVille's defenses so that Discord can terrorize the town, and then I'll be able to have a valid reason to get a human to Equestria!" The Mistress was clearly a different mare from the one that greeted him at the library; she was out of her mind.

"B- But Why would a pony like you want to have sex with a human? That's crazy and wrong, it's interspecies sex, it defies so many laws and practices. I mean, a pony shouldn't be aroused by the sight of a huma--" Dalton stopped right there. He realized that what he said was nothing short of hypocritical. He was a man who loved technicolor ponies and he saw nothing wrong with that; how could he have been so foolish? All of this was a cruel joke played out on him, with Princess Molestia turning the tables and forcing Dalton to be on the receiving end instead of his intention of having a taste of hot pony flank and slit. He hung his head in utter shame and guilt, his arousal finally gone and his corndog finally rested.

Surprisingly after that, Dalton didn't experience the slightest pain or pleasure on any part of his body for a long while, prompting him to look up. He saw a sobbing Celestia, on her haunches, with whip in mouth. It was such an angelic yet pitiful image, the flawless and curvaceous Princess in the bright spotlight; Dalton couldn't feel anything but confusion, and utter fear at the steep transformation in Celestia's demeanor.

"First, y-you're on my cock licking like nothing matters, then you're b-bawling?" said Dalton, trying his best not to sound angered. It was genuine sadness in Celestia, and no being alive could talk to her in a tone that could slightly offend.

"S-S-Sorry... I just thought you'd... be happy..." murmured Celestia, her eyes wet and bloodshot but not from madness. "I r-read some fanfictions and surfed the Ponynet.... It seemed like this 'Molestia' persona is something you humans love and adore, and I tried to emulate her... so sorry, Mr. Dalton... In my desperation to bed a human, I seemed to have forgotten that some do not fancy discipline and submission. You'll never want me now."

Celestia ended her sentence with a pout in her lips and large, watery purple irised eyes, an innocent look that would put all of the immaculate Deviantart photos of Fluttershy to shame. Dalton's willy became wild, immediately standing up to the look. Celestia's eyes shot down to his growing heat but just as quickly shot them back up, with a growing blush on her tear soaked cheeks.

"I guess you're right.... It's rather... unbecoming of me, or anypony to do such a thing to another species.... I guess I'll have to let you go then," said Princess Celestia with a note of finality, sighing as she used her magic on Dalton's cuffs, starting to pry them open. Dalton pitied the princess, and wanted to help, and was compelled to say the following.

"Please! Don't! I... I have a problem too. I can't really stop thinking of... ponies and fucking them to kingdom come." At this, Celestia's eyes widened and a smile graced her face.

"Look, it's just... My dong isn't exactly what you'd call well-endowed. So I really don't think I can reciprocate to my fullest potential," said Dalton, and for once wasn't ashamed and was sincere, since the Princess was someone he could relate to, having similar desires as he did. The Princess became the warm and charitable Celestia he knew and loved. Well, at least he thought so as she spoke the next line.

"Why, I have just the thing. Wait here," said Princess Celestia, winking out of the dungeon but at the same time filling the room with light. Dalton's eyes were flooded with radiance and he immediately shut them, and when his vision slowly came to, he observed his surroundings and with great shock. To his left was a large mirror on the wall, and beside it was a cupboard with shelves upon shelves of human action figures. On the wall across from him, there was a wooden door that was a bit taller than Celestia and to its right was a desk with a computer. To his right, there was something that would grace his wet dreams for days to come; A cupboard with rows upon rows of dildos and vibrators (even a sybian ride) and all of them were still fresh with juices. Fragrant, cinnamon smelling juices which Dalton knew wasn't actual cinnamon solution mixed with flowers, but actually Celestia's cunt juice. Dalton wanted to feel the sex toys, but he was still struggling with the cuffs, which Celestia still left locked. Just then, a flash of yellow light filled the room and Celestia appeared abruptly, followed by a red maned alicorn.

"Um... Dalton, say hello to my mother," said Princess Celestia, bearing a nervous smile.

The alicorn was taller than Celestia and had a crimson mane that flowed down her sides. Her entire coat was white and behind her ear was a fat 2B pencil. Her irises were blue, and right now she stared Dalton down in a stare that was a mix of confusion and disgust, turning away when she gazed down at his exposed nethers. She took an indignant turn to Princess Celestia.

"What is your business bringing him down here? Why would you need to cross the dimensional plane to bring a... a human here! To sate your lust? Don't think I don't know what goes on in these rank dungeons, Celestia. You need to get help and an intervention for your sickness, as I've reiterated to you countless times in the past," said the alicorn, who looked vaguely familiar to Dalton. "Why did you even bring me down here? You should know that the proper way of solving the problem is bringing him back where he came from. Do so, immediately!"

Dalton saw Celestia cower under her mother's might, and Dalton felt sorry yet again, like the time he saw Discord corner Fluttershy. His protective side taking over by the endearing scene in front of him, and he yelled out to the alicorn, attempting to tell her off.

"You stop it, alright! I don't care if you're... you're... uh... Who are you?" inquired Dalton finally, unsure on how to address the stranger.

"Lauren Faust. My card," she said, shaking her pencil off of her head and gripping it in her hooves, then picking it up with her mouth and drawing something in mid air. It took the form of a card and became solid. As Dalton looked at Faust's powers in wonder, she picked up the card with her teeth and flicked it at Dalton, which didn't really reach him as it flew straight up into the air and spiraled down to the ground. Faust shrugged.

"I kinda run this place. Well, created it, actually. I don't make the rules," she said, glaring at Celestia. She sighed and brought a hoof to her temple.

"It seems that you have overstayed, man. You should be on your way home. I'll draw you a portal and you can put this traumatizing journey behind you. As for you, my misbehaving little alicorn," She said, staring down Celestia, "I think I'm going to have to give you a little time-out. Lock you in the room with Bloo for two weeks this time."

At this, Celestia's eyes shot open, reducing to tiny pupils. Celestia's wings unfurled and flapped, and as fast as you could say the word 'swag' Faust was squirming on the ground, pinned by Celestia's hooves. The pencil rolled on the ground towards Dalton's perch on the metal table, and he wondered why he still wasn't brought down yet as he stared at the pencil for what felt like hours. It's my ticket out, he thought, as he futilely strained at his cuffs.

Ahead of him, the two alicorns were tussling on the ground, with legs, hooves and wings all over the place. At one point, Celestia socked Faust in the muzzle with a hoof, but after the red maned alicorn shook her head and came to, she bucked Celestia off, causing her to fly backwards and crack the wall behind her.

"Ha! Your mother still can throw a few punches," Faust said, stretching and admiring her hooves. Celestia fell off the wall and onto the ground, exhausted from the day's events and pained from the blow.

"Can't you use your magic?" said Dalton to Celestia, wanting to help. The pink maned alicorn's eyes brightened up, and her horn glowed with a belligerent black. Okay, it's hard to imagine a black glow but bear with me, alright? Weird shit goes down in FaustWorld.

"Oh, no Celestia. Don't tr--" Before she could finish, Faust suddenly disappeared from view, and a bright light filled the room. Dalton suddenly felt the tightness of the cuffs around his limbs loosen greatly, and felt himself falling through about a metre of air before landing face first onto cold, hard ground. He looked up and around his surroundings; he was in the same room, but free from his bondage. However, a new occupant took his initial place, and a struggling Faust was strapped to the metal table instead.

"You'll regret this, Celestia!" Faust cried, straining against the cuffs. Celestia returned the threat with a smirk and licked Dalton's entire face, drowning it in cool, divine saliva that Dalton enjoyed; her tongue was smooth and her licks felt like refreshing blasts of water on his face. Dalton gave a nervous smile, but remembered a question that was burning in his head.

"Why can't you use magic?" Dalton asked Faust. Celestia chuckled and answered his question, while Faust cried for help and doubled her physical efforts to free herself, but only in vain.

"She simply can't. She's a human translated to equine. Even if she has a fancy horn and wings, she'll never be able to use an ounce of magic against me. The only thing that she possesses with a substantial amount of magic is this pencil," Celestia finished, trotting up to her mother and flicking her mother's horn(earning a growl), before picking up the pencil.

"Now, about that... Stallionhood of yours," said Celestia, a crimson blush spreading over her face, "Is it alright, if I..."

"Can you change me into a pony?" said an excited Dalton, the words escaping his lips. That was every brony's dream; to become a pony and roam PonyVille, to be caught up in her ups and downs and hang out with the Mane Six, the Cutie Mark Crusaders, the Royal Sisters, or whoever and fight the evils and overcome the challenges that lie their way, and restore harmony. Well, most bronies. I think.

Celestia smiled and hugged Dalton, her warm white fur pressing against his chest.

"It shall be done. Close your eyes," said Celestia, the warmest of smiles gracing her lips and the most curious of eyes sizing up Dalton and his stout 'spear', as if she was an anticipating teenager about to be deflowered and saw a man's hood for the first time. Pencil in mouth, she leaned down on Dalton, her eyes gazing up to check that he had his own eyes closed. Dalton had to comply, and soon, he felt the strangest combination of feelings; none of them were painful, but it was strange, as if someone was toying with his nerves, switching them off or on whenever they pleased. He lost control of some of his body parts, yet he became more sensitive in other regions, like his eyes, ears, and his... Aptly named Anal Annihilator. He felt something soft as he rubbed the ground, most probably the growing coat of fur on his entire body. He lost control of his fingers and toes, and suddenly felt something, like a new limb, stirring out and flicking around in the region above his rear. At this point, after feeling a tail at his behind, Dalton no longer doubted the pencil's magic; he was a stallion.

"Open your eyes, dear," said Celestia, beside herself in excitement, "I would have preferred you to be a human, but I was afraid your old body wouldn't suit a longer stallionhood."

Dalton followed her request and opened his eyes, observing himself in the mirror at the side of the room. He gasped at what he saw: he was an Earth pony lying on the ground on its back, a little smaller than Celestia but probably larger than the average pony. His color combination was horrible, with a coat that was a mottled green and bright pink irises, a blonde spiky mane done up in a mohawk. He realized that his voice got substantially deeper as he grunted and tested it. But the most alarming part of him wasn't what was above, but what was beneath; his new and improved Super Speedy Sex Slit Squeezy 9000 was longer than he imagined, about two inches from the ground when it was at rest. He couldn't wait to test this baby out. With a start, Dalton leapt up from the ground and immediately became bipedal. He shook his head and rested his hooves on the ground, awkwardly trying to trot. After a few test runs, he could gallop quite comfortably across the room. In the middle of the room, a patient yet hormonally imbalanced Celestia desperately needed fucking, and she piped up, wanting Dalton.

"Uh.... Let's take this slow huh?" said a nervous Celestia, "We both saw how 'Molestia' worked out..."

"It's fine," said Dalton, "I'd rather call you by that name, stupid sexy Molestia." Dalton was overcome with confidence at his new form (and his greatly increased length).

At that, Celestia gave a squee of delight, and leaned into Dalton, her mother's horrified eyes and critical voice becoming background; Fucking Dalton was first priority.

Celestia licked her chops as Dalton laid on the ground and spread his hind hooves, revealing the longest flaccid horse dong Celestia had ever seen (She drew it!). It needed stimulation, and Celestia could deliver that in a cinch. She bent her head down and took the entire foot of Dalton's Equine Enterer into her mouth, dunking it in a sea of princess amylase and pleasure. Inside the Princess's trap, her experienced tongue did its work, wrapping itself around Dalton's horse sausage and hugging it tight, while slathering generous heaps of saliva onto it. All of this caused Dalton to experience waves of pleasure through his body, synchronized with Celestia's head bobbing. Every time her head left his shaft, her long tongue would still be binding his Dr. Wang, holding it in place and encouraging an erection (which was rather hard to come by. Are horses harder to stimulate? Anywho, moving on). And she'd be doing all of this with such grace and propriety, her slender neck craning up and down with her movements, as if the dirty act of blowing jobs was dignified. On the metal table, Lauren Faust was getting positively turned on; she wasn't a hardcore clopper, but that scene, that mixture of pleasure and serenity, could turn on even an ED'd male or a strict lesbian, and there was a growing heat in her loins as a result. She struggled harder; though she was planning to say something along the lines of "Can't you two get another room?", Faust thought against it, as she was positively turned on by the scene, and heavily desired Dalton to come up and do her on the table.

"Urggh... I need you..." came a sweaty Faust, horny beyond belief. Celestia looked up and smirked, increasing the pace of her bobbing and going even deeper down Dalton's Horse Hammer, earning more groans from both Dalton and Faust. With each bob, her throat would make a 'gulp' sound, and Dalton's large pink shlong would be glistening with saliva; each time she moved up or down, a loud wet noise would be made and his 'head' would be clogging up her windpipe. Dalton thrusted his hips up to aid Celestia's active head, and his one eyed snake was growing by the inch with each suck. It grew larger and larger, and at its peak, Celestia stopped her movements and looked up at Dalton, mischief in her eyes.

"Why'd you stop?" said Dalton, his mind lost in ecstasy, unable to come up with a single clopfic that could describe just how hot that experience was. Celestia licked off a glob of pre-cum that leaked out of the end of Dalton's creamer and spread it across her chops.

"I want you to take me," she said sultrily, turning her rump to face him, her flowing tail whipping up and crossing her mate's muzzle. Just like in the clopfics... but about 21% hotter... Like 20% hotter just 1% above it.... thought Dalton, his imagination adrift in lust. She lifted her curtain and the main attraction hung in front of him: a luscious, glistening collection of moist folds that were inviting entry, flanked by furry flanks adorned with the mark of the Sun on both sides. It was large, but it wasn't anything his engorged stallionhood of a horse dong couldn't handle. Dalton thought about mounting her, but shook his head, prompting a confused look from Celestia.

"Wha... What? You don't want to do it?" Celestia said, in a rather disappointed tone.

"Er.. no. It's just that you mentioned lusting for humans, which I'm totally cool with by the way," Dalton said in his movie star, Elvis-like baritone, "So I'd want to do some human positions. Spice things up a little, know what I mean?"

Celestia liked the idea. She gave her body up to Dalton as he used his forelegs to turn her over onto her back, feeling up her sensitive, hot haunches as he did so, eliciting squeaks of utter pleasure. He slapped his hoof against Celestia's flank, making her squeal, then she smiled widely and panted like a dog to indicate how much she needed him. The anticipation was killing Celestia, Dalton and Lauren Faust, who wanted to get off the cuffs to masturbate like crazy. Subtle aren't I?

Facing Celestia on the floor now, Dalton positioned himself appropriately, his big baby batter bazooka (say that 20 times and pat yourself on the back if you could do it without the slightest mistake in pronunciation) hovering outside Celestia's abyss. As he prepared to get rid of his virginity, he couldn't help but feel a little tense, but when he looked up at Celestia's hungry face, his tension flew away, as he realized that Celestia was craving this.

Dalton slowly moved up, placing his tip at Celestia's entrance. Celestia gasped, feeling electricity (entirely metaphorical, of course) flow through her body as he teased her, searching her surface folds with his dangling fury, which had a circumference about half the surface area of Celestia's meat muffin. He placed his forehooves beside Celestia's face, and raised his rump high, since his generous length forced him to raise himself high if he wanted to continue his torture. His excitement was off the charts, but he couldn't rush it; he had to do everything as his instincts told him, his years of clopfic writing coming into play. Celestia, on the other hand, needed him.

"PLEASE! Stu, I need you badly! I cannot believe I'm saying this, but... make me your little bitch for the night!" cried Celestia, as Dalton continued shifting around her layers. If it was possible, Dalton became harder, as Celestia cried out his first name as a nick name and swore like a slut. He decided not to stall any further, and slowly pushed himself into Celestia's tight snatch, his Erected Explorer taking a journey into Celestia's Cunt Canyon. Celestia cried out in a mixture of pain and pleasure as Dalton made his way through her love cave, the sensitive nerve endings on his Doughnut Holder savoring the surrounding vaginal juice, the warm, hot meat surrounding it and the cosiness offered by Celestia's love hole. It was the best experience of his life; probably nothing he did now or in the future could ever compare to his first entry of a mare, and the princess of Equestria at that. He continued driving his drill in with wet gusto, loving the very receptive Celestia as he continued his expedition; Celestia's cunt seemed to carry on forever. Finally, he bottomed out, nestling himself comfortably in Celestia's warmness, relishing the sounds she emitted that hinted at feelings of hurt, through which genuine desire blossomed forth. Celestia's such an adorable masochist, he thought.

"I drew your large, handsome big colt down there to fit me just right," Celestia said, her eyes rolled up and her tongue lolling out, and looked just as lost as Dalton. "Now, fuck me!"

Dalton happily complied, pulling back by a generous length then slamming her with unmerciful force, making a wet sloppy sound; Celestia was probably all oiled up at the time of the blowjob, and the amount of juices flowing in her vag were astonishing, though Dalton had a feeling that wasn't the most she could leak out. He continued his smooth and fast thrusting, his jammer positively soaked to the base with fluids. Dalton was spurred on greatly by Celestia's moans and pleas for him, swearing like a sex-crazed whore. With successive thrusts, he felt himself touch this bean shaped region of her insides, which seemed to him like a mare's G-spot, and when ever he did so, she cried out particularly loudly and a greater volume of sex fluid came down on his pony pecker.

"Oh, yes, tame me! I've been a very naughty mare! Don't let up.... I'm close!!" Celestia said, as an already copious volume of fluid was leaking out with every time Dalton pulled back. "HARDER!! ARE YOU A PUSSY?!"

When Celestia screamed, Dalton was turned on to catastrophic levels, and he proceeded to accelerate, the fluids and meat around his mare tamer erotically cradling it. Dalton's two veggies bounced violently in their sack, slapping Celestia's flawless flank with each thrust. The friction between their organs increased, and the temperature in Celestia's doughnut increasing to unexpected levels; both were near release. Despite that, they rutted for about 10 minutes at this speed and friction, the heat of the Sun within Celestia's core enveloping Dalton's Pussy Eviscerator. Then it came.

"OH FUCK ME!" yelled Celestia, as she reached her orgasm. A torrent of fluids flowed out from Celestia's nethers, drenching Dalton's fur and his inner haunches, at the same time drowning his Womb Poker. The muscles in her privates suddenly clenched down on Dalton's Cunt Destroyer with crushing force, not allowing him to exit. The pressure caused by the abrupt action of Celestia's muscles was the last straw; Dalton felt his orbs empty themselves and carry their Luscious Load down his urethra, finally depositing itself inside Celestia. Dalton's own torrent came in waves; with each successive unloading, a volume of fluid would exit Celestia's Cock Cushion, drenching the floor, Celestia's haunches and Dalton's haunches. Unbridled moans of sex and fragrant smells of mixed fruit and lavender and rose flowers filled the room, and Dalton marveled at the exotic smell of his new baby batter and how his bags of white solution could allow him such resilience, unloading about 13 to 16 loads of stallion fluid. Dalton, quite fatigued by now, collapsed onto Celestia's chest, and he ran a hoof up and down her round furry belly, his 'big boy' still inside of her. He raised his upper body up and looked at Celestia; her head was held back, exposing her throat to him and her mouth was agape. If Dalton had taken a picture of Celestia now, the title of it would be 'Satisfaction', since it epitomized a quenching of a thirst, a thirst for lust. Celestia's head snapped back to gaze into Dalton's eyes, her own eyes shifting under fluttering eyelids, with long black eyelashes adding to the beauty. Without a word, Dalton pressed his muzzle onto Celestia's in a French kiss.

It was quite the awkward kiss, with Celestia being uncertain at first how to reciprocate; Dalton had pressed his tongue furiously against her lips for entry but she didn't get the message until Dalton verbally told her to open up. When she got the hang of it, they made out like wild animals would, saliva dribbling and frothing from their mouths, tongues flailing about and lips mashing together, making very sloppy sounds. They did all of this this while he was still inside of her.

"Damn... You're amazing Ce-- I mean, Molestia," Dalton said, finally resting his head on her chest, a satisfied grin on his face. Celestia also felt the need to rest and lay there on the cold hard floor; even her strong back couldn't take so much punishment, and she wrapped her forelegs around Dalton's back, closing her eyes. She wore a similar countenance as Dalton as she drifted off into sleep, her love cave still housing Dalton's lovestick, fresh juices still flowing out from there to drip onto the floor.

On a metal table in the middle of the room, Lauren Faust's pussy was hot and moist as hell but it was only teetering on the edge of orgasm; see, Faust couldn't just experience it on the spot just by visual stimulation, she needed to be rutted well and proper. It was a torture to be audience to what could perhaps be the hottest sex scene in Equestria and not to be able to, how should I put it, relate to the female protagonist by aid of toys or hooves.

"Untie me this instance! Celestia, If you untie me now, your punishment will be less severe! Celestia! I have needs too...." Faust ended desperately, her pristine white face crimson red as she observed erotic fluids pool up on the floor below the couple. It was going to be a long night.

LELELELELEL

In a nursing home in England, the three surviving members of Led Zeppelin were resting on velvet armchairs holding classical guitars and reminiscing the old days. Suddenly, the skeletal John Paul Jones got a horrible headache and bent down on the floor. The other two, the asian astrophysicist Jimmy Page and aged banshee Robert Plant hurried down to pick him up until they received headaches of their own. A rip in the space time continuum was being made, and Jonesy was quick to place its source.

"Urghh..... Some bloke..... covering our song.... horribly... Stairway to.... Rutting?" gasped John Paul Jones, on the floor on his back as he writhed in agony at the horrible song playing again and again in his head.

"Fuck.... his solo is actually in time... Solos aren't allowed to be in time!" cried Jimmy Page, as he rolled about on the floor as if he was placed on a pool of sulphuric acid, as the impeccably timed solo invaded his ears.

"He..... STOLE OUR SONG!" seethed an angered Robert Plant, whose many years of plagiarism made him seem like the largest hypocrite in the world, as he got mad when people sampled Led Zep.

"Stole our song? Shit doesn't even sound anything like our song," said John Paul Jones, his eardrums threatening to burst.

Robert Plant sighed and went on all fours, starting a jig.

"She's an evil enchantress, who does evil dances, and if you look into her eyes, she'll leave you in trances, and what would she do, she'll mix up an evil brew and then she'll gobble you up in a big tasty stew so.... watch out!" heaved Robert Plant in a single breath, the strain from having to listen to the invasive tune from another world so stressful that he suddenly was spurred to sing his favorite song from his favorite TV show, My Little Pony. He was a closet brony so he immediately shut his mouth afterwards.

"You watch My Little Pony, mate?" said the other two members in unision. Robert Plant had no idea how they knew this from that one song only, but nonetheless, he didn't question things and he started bawling.

"That show's lame as fuck," said John Paul Jones and Jimmy Page, and they nodded in agreement, though in their hearts they were closet bronies as well. This was the first stage of brony conversion: denial. Just then, there was a rip in the heavens above, and a choir of angels accompanied the ceiling that crashed down, raining debris on the old rockers. A nurse who had just entered the room gasped and pointed above to the descending figure of John Bonham in a robe, while he had two drumsticks in each hand, flapping them like wings as he came down. The nurse shrieked shrilly, but Plant shrieked shrillier, being the banshee he was. The door behind the nurse locked itself as Bonham waved a drumstick at the lock, preventing escape.

"Hear me, Rob--" Bonham started, but Plant shrieked.

"I sa--" Plant screamed yet again, interrupting Bonham.

"A--"

"AAAHHHHH!!!!!!"

"Guys, shut him up."

Jonesy and Jimmy stuffed their fingers into Plant's mouth and he was promptly shut up. Bonham cleared his throat and began yet again.

"Greeti--"

"AHHHHH!!!!"

"Oh, for fuck's sake, whoever screams again is going to fucking hell!" That shut the nurse up. In anger, Bonham continued his speech.

"I have been sent here from the high halls of heaven by the electromagnetic and dimension crossing radiation from a downright disgusting cover of Stairway to Heaven. By my Jesus-like powers, I am back on Earth, to get to the source of the cover and slay the beast who did this. But for me to stay on Earth, I need a sacrifi-- I mean, a willing volunteer of flesh and blood to guard my throne." Bonham looked at the three. All of them pointed a finger at the aged nurse, who cowered in a corner. Bonham raised his eyebrow and lifted a finger, emitting lightning from it and vaporizing the nurse, leaving nothing but smoke and blackened soot where she once laid. Jimmy and Jones yelped and were startled while Plant's pupils grew small, utterly fearful of Bonham. Bonham warmly laughed at their faces and put an index finger to his temple.

"Ha! You should see the look on your faces! Like chads at their first bukkake party," said Bonham, hysterically laughing as he did so, "I thought you guys would be excited at my return! Oh and her? Don't worry bros, I just sent her to hell."

The other three exchanged flabbergasted looks and screamed like girls in unision. They gesticulated their arms wildly and ran around the room, picking up their guitars and smashing them to pieces. Bonham rolled his eyes in his sockets and snapped his fingers, causing all of them to be locked in chairs with gags over their mouths.

"Look, it's been a long day, alright? My boss, that's Beelzeboss for you, was pretty pissed off that this wanker called Stuart Dalton in Equestria butchered Stairway to Heaven. Oh yeah, and I'm not really from heaven. I'm actually Satan's Right Hand. All of this angelic hocus-pocus is a well crafted gimmick meant to coax a sacrifice. Anywho," said Bonham, rubbing his drumsticks together, "Beelzeboss sent me here to team up with you guys to go to the pony world of Equestria to put a stop to the madness and song butchering. Oh yeah, and the evil enchantress song invoked me. I'm pretty keen you guys would come along. Now, no more whining or screaming, you hear? This is the real John Bonham. I still have my ham roll and 40 shots of vodka sloshing somewhere in my belly, but I'm not really sure on showing that to you, so don't you blokes be doubting Thomases."

The other three nodded and they were freed from their chairs and gags, then they looked up at John Bonham. Jonesy piped up first.

"Is she going to be alright?"

"The nurse? Yeah, she's just going to spend about an hour or two on my throne. Since she's not me, she's probably going to be subject to pain equivalent to 60 years of quartering by horses done 24/7, so I guess it's fine since she's still going to be alive after all that."

"You're a... brony?" said Jimmy Page in shock.

"Yeah, everyone in hell is a brony. Oh yeah, and there's furious clopping in hell. Beelzeboss kinda got jealous of Stuart Dalton, so that's one reason why he wanted to send me to Equestria, to beat the bloke up."

"Who's Satan's Left Hand?" inquired Robert Plant.

"Oh, Keith Moon of course."

The other three let out an 'Ohhhh' and Bonham came down, still in his robe of white and embraced the other three.

"We're Led Zeppelin, but this Hindenburg still isn't burnt up yet," said John Bonham, "on the count of three we're going to be in Equestria and we're going to exact musical justice. We're going to kick some flank in the name of Beelzeboss."

Then, after Bonham's count to three, there was a brief explosion of flames, and Led Zeppelin disappeared, leaving blackened soot in their wake.

LELELELELEL

Luna opened her eyes, a throbbing headache coming on. Though she was a nocturnal creature, adjusting to this extent of darkness took some time. Luna realized that she was pinned, vertically, to a cold metal table by hoofcuffs, with her hind hooves spread wide in a highly provocative manner. She groaned, observing her surroundings; when observing proved ineffective in determining the nature of the room she was in, she resorted to echolocation, a skill taught to her by the bat ponies that serve under her. With a few clicks of her tongue, she located a table in the far corner of the room to her left, and on it was a quill and some parchment. With magical telekinesis, She lifted the quill and probed around the cuffs, trying to find a keyhole. Then, when she failed, she attempted to wink herself out of the table; it turned out that there was a magical enchantment cast on the table, preventing winking. She sighed, easing her telekinesis and dropping the quill. Damn you, sis, she thought in her mind. The fate of Equestria was threatened, as she shuddered and remembered the last time Celestia became... Molestia.

Then, it hit her. Why not send a letter to Spike? Spike was never far away from the Mane Six and she, like her sister, could send letters to Spike with alicorn magic, allowing him to burp out the sent letter in his green flames. She could keep the Mane Six updated about her whereabouts, so if an imperative task was at hand or important evidence showed up, she could inform them, which could give them further clues as to where she was. With desperation, Luna picked up the parchment with magic and rearmed her quill, furiously scribbling away at her letter. Turned out, she needed a bit more than one piece of parchment due to her outrageously large handwriting, and the table had parchment aplenty. She hoped that her abundance of letters wouldn't discomfort Spike as she sent them away with magic.

LELELELELEL

In the sewers of PonyVille, Spike was still tied up to his chair, but he was sinking into a large pile of literal horseshit, about a foot for every hour that passed. By then, Spike was already knee deep, and he was panicking hard as he sloshed about in the viscous pony poop. The smell was assaulting his sensitive dragon nose, and it was hell packed into a single scent. His claws were tied behind his back, unable to pinch his nose, or free himself for that matter. He struggled futilely at the ropes, thoughts of his mistress Rarity in distress at the hands of the cruel Stuart Dalton transcending his mind. Just then, his stomach rumbled, the familiar feeling of a letter from Princess Celestia rising up his oesophagus. He beamed in anticipation; there was hope at the end of the tunnel after all! Celestia was going to rescue Spike and put Dalton in chains. Spike did his best to push the letter out, but when the tiniest spark of green flame left his mouth, something else entirely greeted Spike's eyes.

*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMZZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPJJJJJJJJJJJJAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTWWWWWWWWWWW*

A large explosion ensued, having energy equivalent to a fully packed Guns n' Roses concert. Though he was a dragon and was quite used to heat, the temperature was so strong that it singed off a couple of Spike's scales and threatened to boil his eyes in his sockets. His belly became blackened and scalded from the intense heat and the chair and ropes burnt off of him, and Spike felt close to death. Of course, introducing fire into a methane filled channel wasn't the most pragmatic approach if one wanted to escape safely. It seemed that Celestia was forcing him to burp out letters. Then, the same feeling invaded Spike's stomach, and his eyes widened in utter fear.

LELELELELEL

"There, 20 pieces of parchment should get the message through," said Luna, her horn exhausted from telekinesis.

LELELELELEL

(Warning: this part has been done under the influence of bad shrooms and good music. I think that I shall do so for every sequence containing the Mane Six.)
In the Gazepo, a bunch of IQ deficient horsefucks by the name of the Mane Six were gathered around the Gazepo, since they followed the advice of fucking kid horses. Quite expected really, from these whorses; I mean, look at Equestria Girls, they were gullible human pieces of shit who believed Cumset Jizzer's story by looking at a fucking photo cutout. And they accepted the friendship of this purple human stranger with a fucking talking dog whose purpose in life was to get his dog dong into Rarity's pale human pussy. Furthermore, they resolved their personal friendship conflicts by blaming everything on Cumset Jizzer, shallow much? Finally, FlashLight (or FleshLight?) is probably the worst canon ship ever; I mean, the dude got a fucking hard-on from touching Twicunt's hand and the bitch practically had a little orgasm at that time. Also, the animators try too fucking hard by making the characters blush to indicate feelings of love, to compensate for poor script writing, to pass off as shipping. I mean, there are hundreds of dedicated, awesome writers on FIMFiction that could dish out a script with a proper and deep love plot which would make people blush and D'awww at how adorable the shipping would be. On the other hand, the script writers of Equestria Girls should be taken back to elementary school and take basic literature and study for about 8 years on that topic alone, to know what makes a good, round luscious plot.

Anyway, back to the Gazepo. Not much to say, really. They just waited. Applejack ran all the way back to the farm to get some apple pie but no one had the appetite. Pinkie Pie threw a 'Come back to Equestria soon' party in which all of them rehearsed for the actual 'Our Saviour is actually back in Equestria party'. So yeah, it was pretty boring.

NEXT TIME: On Clopper In PonyVille. Will Spike be able to save the day? Will Luna stop sending Spike letters? Will Led Zeppelin take out Stuart Dalton in their quest for copyright? Will Molestia be back once and for all? STAY TUNED and be ready for the epic conclusion (or not, depends on my mood) for chapter 6: The Crystal Empire Strikes Back. Or something.

Author's Note

Disclaimer: The members of Led Zeppelin do not reside in a nursing home, nor is John Bonham an incarnation of Jesus. Led Zeppelin is not a band of bronies either. And no, Jimmy Page is not Michio Kaku. Furthermore, Lauren Faust is not a pony. I think? And Lauren Faust is married. I hope?

If this chapter doesn't get me a thousand views in a week, I shall have to end this series on the next chapter. It's been a great joy though!