"Rarity! Where's Mr. Dee?" cried a worried Pinkie Pie, her eyes furrowed and her head turning about rapidly around the Boutique, as she paced around the bottom floor and called for the fashionista. Interrupted in the midst of her wallowing, Rarity fluttered her eyes open and replied to Pinkie.

"Oh Pinkie, it was just dreadful... I fear that I may have driven off our friend to some far corner of Equestria, because of my actions... Stupid! How foolish of me to let him slip out of hoof so easily!" That being said, Rarity tossed around in bed further and drowned herself in pity even more. Outside, the bell above the door of the Boutique rang, and four other familiar voices rang through the Boutique.

"Where is he?" came the voice of Fluttershy.

"He'd better be close," said an angered Rainbow Dash, "Or whoever foalnapped him is in for a hoof in the face!"

"Rarity! Git yer flank down 'ere and explain yerself! Ya were the last one with 'im!" shouted Applejack.

"Well, I better hope it wasn't anything serious... His hospital robe is still here," said a genuinely worried Twilight Sparkle, levitating a piece of tattered garment that could hardly be called apparel.

And where is Spike now, you ask? It turns out, Spike shifted his chair a little too close to the Boutique's newly installed garbage chute and tripped over a ball of yarn that was conveniently situated near the chute's opening, sending him, still tied up in the chair, down the rank tunnel and into the sewers of PonyVille. Therefore, he was nowhere to be seen in the Boutique, being trapped inside the methane filled network of filth below PonyVille.

"Rarity! We need your help in finding him! There's still time and we should set out as fast as we can!" yelled Twilight, and this elicited a yelp from Rarity as she slid off the bed, hurrying to get her wallowing clothes off for going out. Rarity, bearing a look of determination and splattered mascara on her face, trotted out of her room.

"So? What are you girls waiting for? We have a human to catch!" Rarity said, wiping her face of mascara and galloping out of the Boutique door, with her five friends trailing closely behind.

LELELELELEL

Dalton ran and ran, until his legs gave way underneath him. He fell to the ground, and his body met soft grass and moist soil. He looked up and saw a roof-like structure supported by several trees; it was familiar and PonyVille's Gazepo was the only thing that came to his mind. Dalton lay there in the grass, his frilly suit still on him, his skin flute resting on the ground out of the crotch hole Rarity cut out for him. All of a sudden, to his great surprise, Dalton cried greatly and sat up, burying his face in his fists and bawling out loud, as if no one was around to see him. He didn't really care; the disappointment in his heart was too monumental to bottle in, so he decided to let the revelation that he could never indulge in DAT PONY ASS sink in. He sobbed for a good 5 minutes until a white hoof rested itself on Dalton's right shoulder.

"There, there, my little human. What ails you so? Have the citizens of PonyVille been ill treating you?" A mellifluous voice came from behind Dalton, and that was Princess Celestia. He dared not to turn around, since his perpendicular pickle was still hanging out of that horrid hole in his suit. Dalton took a glance behind, and saw the Sun Princess with Princess Luna at her side as well, both looking at him with worry. He wiped a tear from his reddened face; the morals of masculinity weren't so strictly adhered to by Dalton in his dream world of Equestria, and his resolve broke like a shattered dam.

Rapidly, Dalton told Celestia and Luna all that had transpired in recent events; Rarity calling him over, his attempted rape of the fashionista, his failure and hi s fleeing to the Gazepo. He also lamented heavily on how the only notable sexual experience he had in Equestria was with Discord, and mulled at how pathetic he was that the only thing that aroused him to the extent of ejaculation here was a male Draconequus. Then a long moment of silence followed, when Celestia and Luna merely stood there, seemingly unsure on how to help the troubled brony. Then, Dalton heard the two sisters converse with each other.

"I must do it, sister. I must unlock... it." started Princess Celestia, startling her sister. Dalton, in the midst of his sorrow, wondered what it was.

"No sister! I forbid it! Remember the last time it was done! You effectively put PonyVille in jeopardy!" Luna was indignant and firm in her stand, and clearly disapproved of whatever Celestia wanted to do.

"Oh come on, Luna, you're not thinking straight. Must have been the zombification that has gotten to your head. Sit back, relax and let me do all the work, sister," said Celestia, and for once in his time in Equestria, Dalton saw mischief in the smile and eyes of Celestia. Wait... Is she gonna fuck me? Sweet! thought Dalton in glee, before quickly getting reminded of his rather short predicament, as his tallywhacker flopped up in arousal for a brief moment.

"No.... it shan't happen! Never again!" Cried Luna, tipping her head down and aiming her horn at Celestia. Before Celestia could do anything in retaliation, Luna's horn emitted a blast of deep purple energy, hitting Celestia squarely on her chest, causing her to fly back, through the trunk of a nearby apple tree. It was clear that whatever Luna was trying to prevent from happening was big and threatening, very much like how Dalton wanted his crotch cowboy to be. Sorry, I couldn't resist.

"Run, Stuart Dalton of Earth! Run! Back to Earth you go!" said Luna. Dalton was wrought with confusion, his head abuzz with questions, but complied, not wanting to tempt the wrath of the Princess of the Night. What could have been so serious that Luna had to fight against her own sister?

However, not barely a minute later, a burst of radiant light invaded his eyes as Princess Celestia winked (teleported) into the space in front of him. Her face was one of anger now, and her once pristine, brilliantly white chest had a blackened spot where Luna blasted her. Dalton looked back at the Gazepo and saw Princess Luna, prone on the ground, looking at him with desperation in her eyes and a hoof outstretched. Celestia had obviously defeated her with greater magic and now Celestia knocked Dalton to the ground, pinning him down by the shoulders with her hooves. Celestia's my enemy now, thought Dalton, and he shut his watery eyes for what was to come next. A bright flash of orange lit up the insides of his eyelids and after that, the world went dark and he spun down yet again into a nauseating tunnel that broke time and space.

In a bush near the Gazepo, three young fillies gasped.

LELELELELEL

(Warning: the part you are about to see was done under influence of bad shrooms and horrible music)

"Where are you Mr. Dee!!" Cried Pinkie Pie as the Mane Six made their rounds around PonyVille.

"Whoever took him, I'm gonna introduce them to my hoof!" declared Rainbow Dash, rage in her eyes.

The Mane Six, being the unbelievably fucking stupid wankers they were, searched around PonyVille instead of listening to Rarity when she noticed the bloke running out towards the Gazepo. So, being the long winded horseshits they were, they mindlessly asked random blokes on the street on where the fuck Stuart was.

"Have you seen a human???" interrogated Rainbow Dash as she grabbed a brown coated stallion by his throat.

"I'm American," Said Dr. Whooves, "and let me go!"

Rainbow Dash, in her fit of rage, flew up into the air, carrying the poor doctor with her 60 feet into the air. On the ground, the saidistic natures of the Mane Six caused them to cheer and laugh as they saw Rainbow Dash's attempt to kill the doctor.

"I'll let you go!" smirked Rainbow Dash, releasing her grip on the doctor, causing him to plummet to his death. Unfortunately for her and the rest of the Mane Six, they wouldn't get their fun just yet, as the Doctor used his mind powers to summon a worm hole that cut through the fabric of space and time, causing him to fucking blink out of the realm they were in. The ponies, utterly dumbfounded, were disappointed they didn't get to jump up and down on the doctor's mangled carcass.

Just then, The Cutie Mark Crusaders galloped up to the Mane Six, worry in their eyes as they huffed in unision, "Quick... Gazepo.... Dalton..... Celestia.... Gone..."

"Well, why didn't ya come ta us earlier! Let's go!" cried Applejack, galloping and putting the rest of the Mane Six and the Cutie Mark Crusaders on her back and heading towards the Gazepo. No one even fucking questioned how the Cutie Mark Crusaders said shit in perfect synch.

(End of my high)

LELELELELEL

Dalton forced his eyes open as a bucket of water was thrown against his face. No actual water splashed on him and it was just the pain from the bucket itself that woke him up. He tried moving his arms and legs but they would not comply; it seemed that he was tied down. He turned his head around and got a clearer look; He was strapped vertically to a standing metal table, his hands and feet stuck to the table by metal cuffs. He was still wearing his frilled suit, his pants popper still sticking out. The room around him was entirely dark save for a spotlight he was in; it seemed that he was going to be interrogated. Or something worse...

"You see, Dalton, I didn't tell you the whole story," said a rather sultry, yet familiar voice. Dalton shuddered in fear. It wasn't a tone that this voice was accustomed to.

"I saw you fight Discord. I was the one who helped direct your baby batter onto the right answers in the questionnaire, with a little touch of magic. I was the one who enchanted your Viagra pills to give you a huge.... pulsating.... fuck stick."

Dalton was positively terrified now; whatever it was that was talking, it wanted him, and not in a nice way either. Before he saw it, he felt it; a moist feeling on his pecker and a fleshy, wet tongue carassed it, skillfully tossing it around this way and that, trying to make it rock hard. Dalton had to comply; the tongue was too good, and his wank bank was soon dripping of pre-ejaculatory fluid and standing tall. At least, as tall as it could.

"Ah, ah ,ah, the mistress didn't allow you to stand," came the voice again. Now, the thing moved a little forward, revealing a set of eyes, with small purple irised pupils with a network of bloodshot veins, floating in the darkness. It started to get colder in the room as Dalton dreaded what was to come next. Out of the darkness, a whip came flying forward, leaving a red mark on his chest and causing him to yelp out in pain. The tongue continued to pleasure his gradually softening cum-bone.

"Are you Queen Chrysalis or something?? Nightmare Moon?? King Fucking Sombra??!" Cried Dalton, his resolve waning. Then the figure lifted its tongue off and stepped into the spotlight. It was a large mare and had bloodshot eyes. A pinkish-purple mane and tail. Large wings. A horn dripping of musky smelling fluid. And most horrifyingly, a coat of grayish white and the mark of the Sun on its flank. The legends are true.... She's not just a tumblr persona, thought Dalton with horror. His limbs started frantically moving about, desperate to break free, though his attempts were in vain.

"Now, now, if you want those ponies I have them locked up in the neighboring cells, but now's not the time. Now's the time.... FOR ME!" She resumed her licking, and Dalton strained his hardest to think of unarousing thoughts, but only worry came to mind as he realized how deep in shit he was.

It's her, thought Dalton with terror. He gulped and said it aloud.

"It's... Princess Molestia."

Author's Note

Enjoy this literary travesty. Don't worry, Spike is going to be back. Somewhere along the way. Apologies if the chapter is not long enough, I thought that it would not be very dramatic if I didn't stop at the last line. So, the usual, like, favorite, comment. Please?