The Eleven Doctors

"Master...Would you. Like a. Jelly Filly?" asked a Cyberpony.  Twilight observed that most of the Cyberponies she saw so far started out resembling the ones from The Tenth planet, but as the night waned, they began to look like Cyberponies from The Moon Base, but this one didn't change at all.

"What's with the Cyberponies anyway...and that Dalek in the hot-tub?"

A dark Dalek swivled it's head around and said "DO NOT TELL A-NY DAAA-LEK!!"

Then a Cyberpony approached the Dalek in the hot-tub.  "Would. you. care. for some.  jammy-dodgers?"

"YES, THANK YOU!" the Dalek replied.

Then the Dalek put its plunger on a jammy-dodger...and it's plunger touched the Cyberpony's hoof.

They looked at each other...and a mutual spark was felt.  "HI...." the Dalek said awkwardly.

"They are those that have embraced a measure of individuality, and are thus under my care and protection; they provided me helping hooves with my plans" the Master explained.

"So you didn't bring the Daleks and the Cyberponies into this world?"

"Oh, I helped bring them into this realm this time; typically I despise them, but they were necessary to gain your attention, Doctors.  I loathe how much they hate individuality, and thus I offer sanction for the few that embrace it; not unlike us, really Doctors, for we both fled Gallopfrey for it's suppression of independent thinking and personality..."

"So you did bring the Daleks here."

"Well, with some help..."

"Some help?"

=========

Derpy had a gun trained to her face, which she didn't like, and a stallion dressed in fancy-pants clothes, colonial clothes complete with tri-corner hat and tall white stockings, was barking at her in some foreign language.  Confused, all Derpy could say was, "Umm...you speak...Equestrian?"

Then he lowered his guns and spoke nicely "M'lady, I was born and raised by two good, honest parents in the Trottingham province of Equestria!"

"Oh goodness, why didn't you say so at once?" Derpy asked.

"I've spoken as many languages as I have had the least smattering of; High and low Dutch, Latin..."

Derpy replied: "Well, let's start at the beginning again shall we? What exactly did you say to me?"

Then with the gun trained on her again, he began: "I said 'Beware, false traitor, highwaymare, robber, pickpocket, murderer!"

"I think you must be making some mistake!" Derpy squealed "Highwaymare indeed! Can you tell me when you were last in Trottingham?"

"We set sail from Bristol on May 14, 1699."

"Wait, did you say 'We'?" Derpy inquired.

"What became of my companions, I cannot tell..." the stallion replied as if in a state of dream.  "They were all lost."

"Well sir, you and I are on the same muffin, uh, I mean, boat!!"

"You mean you have a stout ship!" the stallion replied in a far gruffer voice, with the gun now at Derpy's throat."

"Uh, um, well, uh, no.  Look, would you mind taking that gun away? It scares me!"

"Well, m'lady, if you can confirm to me that you are no traitor..."

"Um, a traitor? A traitor to what? I don't even know where I am...where am I?"

"I cannot tell" he said simply.

"Well, that makes two of us, doesn't it? Um, okay, what's going on?" Derpy asked. "Where are my companions? I seemed to have lost them! Can you help me look around-"

"The Ruler forbids it!" the Stallion replied.

"Who's this ruler?"

"The Author."

"The Author?" Derpy asked.

"Yes; he rules these lands now, did ye not know?"

"Uh, nay, I did not...so, tell me about this 'Author'"

===============

The U.N.I.T. soldiers had their share of losses, but they induced the same on their opponents: they turned up horse carts and barricades, and one used a bazooka on a Dalek.  It worked, as the Daleks had not yet been upgraded to their Time-War state power level.  This made the Dalek's compatriots rather upset:

"RAAAUUUUGHH!!! EX-TER-MIN-ATE!! EX-TER-MIN-ATE!! EX-TER-MIN-ATE!!"

They were in luck, as they were divided between Imperial and Pure Daleks, who were still arguing with each other and not helping each other in their ailments.

"YOUR SU-PREME IS SO O-BESE THAT WHEN THE DAAAAA-LEK COM-MAN-DER SAW HIM, HE THOUGHT IT WAS A PLAN-ET!!"

It was then when all the high-ranking officers returned....

Applejack skipped over to them with joy: "Thank goodness you returned! We need your help misters! These Daleks will eventually unite as a whole an' go after us when they're done arguing!"

But the Lieutenant looked at her and said nothing.

Applejack continued: "We gotta go to the Everfree Forest to a big patch of Magnetite and get the Daleks to shoot it!"

"To...wipe their memories clean?" asked a captain.

"Yep Sugarcube...do ya have a problem with that?"

"Why, uh, no!" the Captain said, struggling with something that Applejack couldn't put her hoof around "It's just uh..."

The Brigadier General decided to expand on it: "We thought that we're doing well enough against the Daleks!"

"Not fer long we won't" Applejack continued to explain.  "And while them Daleks may be among the worst of the monsters here, we need other get rid of the other things as well, which we can't do without major losses."

Meanwhile, Pinkie found herself being surrounded by Daleks, and then lifted off the flag pole upon which she stood, being carried away to the Daleks' base of operations. "Um guys...HEEEEELLLLLLP!!!!!!"

Lyra didn't know what else to do! Derpy was probably lost, Applejack was surrounded, Pinkie was being foal-napped, Rarity, Twilight, Fluttershy, Octavia, and Rainbow Dash didn't return yet.  It was just her and Cadence.  That meant it was time to do something really crazy and stupid.

And that meant she had to do it now.

===============

SPECIAL 50TH ANNIVERSARY CHAPTER!!! THIS TIME, THE DOCTORS ACT LIKE PONIES!!!

==============

A bolt of lightning struck the city hall.

"Oh, I, uh, oh, I just don't know what went wrong!" the Second Doctor exclaimed angrily, stamping his feet in frustration on the cloud he stood on, thus generating more lightning.

The Eleventh Doctor then turned his head around, and saw the horrible damage inflicted on the nearby city hall: "Oh yeah, it's a mystery all right..." he said with subtle sarcasm.

===============

"Quit your whining!" the Silurian growled.

The Third Doctor replied: "I am not whining, I am complaining; do you want to hear whining? Thiiiiiis is whiiiiiiniiiiiiing!! Ooooh, this harness is too tight! It's gooooiiiiiing to leave a staaaaiiiiiin..."

===============

Frustrated, the Second Doctor continued to thrust mail in the mailbox: "Open up Mr. Mailbox, it's time for your breakfast!!" he shouted.

===============

The Fourth Doctor recognized Sarah Jane's distinctive call:

"DOOOOCTOOOOR! There is a dead man in our house!"

Indeed there was: It was hard to tell, for the corpse was rather mangled, but it was in fact a dead man all right.

"Oh, hey, how did he get here, Sarah?" the Doctor asked with a large and hilarious grin on his face.

Sarah was troubled by this grin, that she asked: "Doctor, what did you do??!"

"Me? Oh, I didn't do anything Sarah!"

"Explain what happened Doctor!"

"I never seen him before in my life, Sarah!"

"Why did you kill this person Doctor?!"

"Oh, I do not kill people Sarah, that is my least favorite thing to do!" he continued on, still grinning.

"Tell me Doctor, exactly what were you doing before I came home."

"Oh, well, right, I was upstairs."

"Okay."

"I was, uh, I was sitting in my room!"

"Yes."

"Reading a book!"

"Go on."

"Well, then, this man walked in."

"Okay"

"And then I walked up to him."

"Yes..."

"And I stabbed him! 37 times! In the chest! Then I filled the holes with Jelly Babies."

There was a silence.

"DOOOOCTOOOOOORRRR!!!! THAT KILLS PEOPLE!!"

"Oh, oh, wow, uh, I didn't know that...would you like a Jelly Baby?"

"How could you not know that?!"

"Yeah, I'm in the wrong here; I suck!" he proclaimed still smiling.  "So, would you like that Jelly Baby?"

==============

So the First Doctor told the interviewer: "She's great, right? A companion who will clean the dishes for you! only, small problem...Susan cleans them with...wubs."  And then he facepalmed.

==============

"Doctor! Give me back my covers!" demanded the Third Doctor.

The Ninth replied: "I can't hear you, I'm asleep!" and with that, he feigned snoring.

==============

"The only thing better than muffins is waffles, but with lots of muffins on the side!" the Second Doctor declared proudly.

=============

"My favorite word is Comquat!" shouted the Tenth.

=============

The Seventh Doctor rushed up to the Eight, and started:

"Sunshine, Sunshine,

Ladybugs awake!

Clap your hands

and do a little shake!"

The Eighth was looking rather awkward at having the Seventh's arse waved at his face.  "Oh dear..."

============

"Step right up, all you lot, and witness the power of the Great and Powerful Doctor!" shouted the Sixth Doctor.

============

The Fifth Doctor addressed all of the children: "Oh, how about I sing you a lullaby!"

"Yeah!" they all agreed.

"Hush now, quiet now,

it's time to lay your sleepy head.

Hush now, quiet now,

it's time to go to bed..."

"I know this one, Master." K-9 said.

"Oh, would you like to sing it with me?"

"Affirmitive."

"Oh, all right."

K-9's version went something like this:

Youtube Video

And the Fifth Doctor's expression was something like this:

============

With a loudspeaker in hand, balancing himself on a flagpole, and pointing to Jean-Luc Picard, the Tenth Doctor shouted: "Could someone get a wig please, because this guy is really, really, BALD!!!!"  Jean-Luc facepalmed.

============

"He is not Lucie! He is Davros, a madman bent on conquest!" the Eighth Doctor proclaimed accusingly.

Then, 'Lucie' began to change as she laughed:

"Right you are, Doctor! And as Lord Emperor of the Daleks, it is my duty to bring my subjects to cause the total annihilation of the peoples within the city! Soon, ALL SHALL KNEEL BEFORE THE POWER OF THE DALEKS!!!!"

=============

The Fourth Doctor sat on a chair, looking quite content: "Ah, I must be sitting on the most comfortable chair in the world!" But then he looked at the chair he sat upon; "no, there is no way it can be comfortable: It must be my arse! I have the most comfortable arse in the world!" And then, he raised his index finger to his mouth and did his 'eye-thing' he always did.

=============

"Yes, watch as all the little people run the f*** away..." groaned the Twelfth Doctor, as the Seventh tried to persuade him to join the Nightmare Night festival.

=============

In his study, the Seventh Doctor began his letter:

"Dear...Pr-r-r-r-rincess...John...Hurt..."