My Dear Shy - Rick's Lament

Seventh week after the remembrance...

I'm not sure how long I can keep this up.  This pain stabbing me in the chest, it's agonizing.  Everywhere I go or see it makes me think about her.

Damn it all.  Just damn it.

Celestia had to bound the blanket to me.  Why she didn't leave everything as it was is beyond me; because of her foolish mistake, I'm left with these memories.

I continue lying on my antiquated brown couch, spinning Fluttershy's feather with my thumb and index finger, recalling the precious moments we spent together; recalling the years of my growing fondness of her company and kindness.

She was so beautiful and profoundly smart as a filly.  Very naive, moreover, but smart nonetheless.  I greatly admired her innocence, so much that I wished I had that.

Sadly that is far beyond my reach.  Not even raising Fluttershy, or changing my ways, will consider me innocent.  Not by a long shot.

I can't help but think about her, though.  Yet at the same time I wish I could.  While remembering her face brings a smile to my lips, it also hurts me inside my chest, where my heart is.  This pain I feel...  It hurts so very much; it's like my heart is made of fragile glass, and Celestia threw a stone at it, shattering into broken shards.  It's making me nauseous, which explains why I'm lying down in the first place.

I idly glance at the yellow feather, letting time tick tock away the rest of the day until bedtime.

Cartoons have been becoming dull as of recently.  I'm so downhearted that I just can't find the joy out of them anymore...

My dear Shy...  I miss you so.  It is with regret that I allowed Celestia to take you without having any second thought.  I realize that after seven weeks now.

I cannot undo everything that's happened, but surely there is something I can do now that I have your feather in my possession...