Without memories nor past

Luna looked at me seriously, asking: “So, do you understand what you have to do to avoid time distortions inside of your dream ?”

“Yes, I must concentrate on the flow of time, to avoid losing the track of it.”

“Good. Technically you could 'simply' imagine the time slowing down, but most ponies can't correctly visualise the flow of time, and it's easier to use the first method.”

“Okay, but what I don't understand is why you can't slow it down.”

“Because the time flow is altered by your subconscious. It is difficult enough to hold my own subconscious under bounds, but controlling somepony else's is simply impossible.”

“But I can't control my subconscious neither.”

“Yes you can. By just concentrating on the flow of time, you can prevent it from being changed. It's as simple as that.”

“You said you could control your subconscious, does that mean the part that wanted eternal darkness wasn't your subconscious and that you're still evil ?” I immediately regretted my question. But I didn't get the time to apologise, since she, too my great surprise, didn't shout, but instead responded with a calm, rather sad tone; “No, it wasn't my subconscious, although I couldn't even control it at the time, but Nightmare moon was more of an alter ego born of loneliness jealousy and hatred.”

“So that means you're schizophrenic ?” 'Damn it, mouth, stop saying stuff my brain hasn't approved !' She began to laugh 'and, I’m dead...'  but, I realised, it wasn't a cruel, maniacal, or crazy laugh, but a warm, hearty laugh. ''kay, now I’m confused...' Then her voice went back to a sad note;  “I guess you could have said that at the beginning, when she was nothing more than a voice in the back of my head. I began following her 'advice', more and more, until I realised her advice was only hurting myself and the ponies around me, but it was already too late, she had completely taken over my mind and I could only watch as she continued hurting everypony around. And then, she came up with the eternal night idea, to which my sister answered by banishing me, I mean her, I mean us, to the moon. She didn't really have a choice... I had one, at the beginning,but I was foalish enough to listen to the dark side of my heart, and get caught in the trap. I know 'breaking' out of her control seems easy for other ponies, and I feel guilt for not trying harder.”

“Wait, you were being controlled by somepony else, and didn't even try your hardest to escape ? I know I would've.”

“Well, it seemed like I doing all I could to get rid of her but I know I should have tried harder, explored more possibilities.”

“How's that ?”

“It just seems to me I didn't try everything.”

“Hey, you did all you could at the time, if you didn't try a possibility, or didn't invest all of your energy in it, it was probably because you simply couldn't. Besides, don't waste your time dwelling on the past. Live your life like you're supposed to, your life will be over and yo- Wait... you're immortal, aren't you ? Anyway, don't rethink indefinitely the past. It serves absolutely no purpose.”

“Yes, but my sister and I are reminded everyday of my mistakes.”

“Why ? I thought it was part of the past ?”

“Yes, for us, but not for the masses, they are afraid of me, because I am Nightmare Moon, and of m-”

“You were Nightmare Moon, but that's over now, isn't it ?”

“Yes, but most ponies still think I am... And I don't feel like I should be forgiven this easily either. Mainly because I didn't just hurt my own reputation, but I also forced my sister to do it. Since she sent me to the moon 1012 years ago, everypony is scared of her. They always imagine the worst kind of punishments and are overly respectful. And it is not the kind of respect normal royalty gets, it is more of totally fear induced respect, like the 'respect' you give a tyrant. Even her prized student, who is very close to her, thought she might punish ponies stronger if she's the one concerned although she could, she would never punish somepony subjectively. But now that we have a court, we aren't responsible any more for the judgements. I can say it is great to have less duties and more free time.”

“You didn't have other duties, did you ? We spent last night together -Wait, that could sound weird, never mind- talking about dreams, and you didn't do anything else.”

“Of course I do, usually. My sister and I make a lot of political decisions, but we don't have to each and every day. On Fridays we listen to what the population has to say and we change the laws if we think there is a need to. Anyway, that's why I laughed earlier, because you simply don't remember enough to give us even the royal respect, unlike all the other ponies, and that was just hilarious to me.”

“Yeah, that and you don't really seem like a bad pony to me. Celestia didn't appear very judging either.”

“Yes, my sister really is a nice pony, but she's also quite the prankster. Sometimes her pranks aren't much more than a fake tea sip when somepony instantly refills her teacup – this is one of her favourites – but sometimes she plans them pretty well. Like when she 'forgot' to tell me we didn't use the royal Canterlot voice any more. I was wondering for months why ponies were uncomfortable when I spoke. Then I went to Ponyville to celebrate nightmare night, where Twilight Sparkle helped me understand modern society and ponies from Ponyville understood I’m no longer Nightmare Moon. Alas it was not enough to convince the rest of Equestria I’m no longer evil...”

“Oh, but I don't get it, what's the royal Canterlot voice ?”

“It's more like a way of speaking which uses a really old version of our language and a magically amplified voice. Anyway, it's nearing time for dinner, so let's get going, shall we ? The night shift has usually less good food than the diurnal one, since there are less cooks who are willing to work during the night...”

“We didn't eat yesterday, did we ?”

“Well, I did before entering your dream for the first one, and you probably had something during the day.”

The royal dining room was dark. The only light source in the room was a chandelier on the table between Luna and myself. The food wasn't very tasty, I had not eaten anything since I lost my memories, except for a few slices of bread that same 'morning', and even I could tell it wasn't high quality, even though I had nothing to compare it to, and it was cold, which didn't improve the taste either.

Despite the food, the setting could have been described as romantic. The candlelight added a warm touch to the atmosphere around us. I caught myself staring into her beautiful, big blue eyes. We started leaning across the table, we came closer and closer until our lips were only separated mere inches from each other. She then moved to the left, to my ear and whispered : “You know this is a dream, right ?”

“Nope, I didn't until now.”

“Interesting you put us in such a situation...”

“But I didn't, I don't control the primary setting of a dream !”

“Yes you do, but without realising it. It would be true to say it's your subconscious which tries to accomplish some deep wishes of yours, Anyway, we'll talk about it later, outside of dream. Now, let's find that tower again.”

“How do you know it's the same tower ? It could have changed.”

“No, it's the place that symbolises your lost memories. As long as they don't change, the tower won't change, but the dream around it will.”

“One thing, all other dreams seemed unrealistic, or rather, surrealistic, but this one appears normal, almost like reality, why is that ?”

“It doesn't, in reality the candle would give off enough light for us to see the walls.”

“Oh, now I see. I'll try something really quick.”

As I imagined it happening, the walls around us disappeared and the pink wrapped green tower materialized in front of me.

“Wow, you're even better at this than I thought, you can summon an object, or even an entire building without even seeing it. But stay concentrated on the flow of time, we need as much time as we can get.”

“Okay, but how are we gonna get in ?”

“We need to find a way, it's often a some sort of riddle that represents why your mind would lock your memories, and you have to solve it to break the protection around it, in case of locked memories, of course, which happens to be your case.”

And so we started inspecting the tower, a few minutes later, Luna called me: “Hey, I think I found something !”

I joined her at the front side of the impressive building. She was pointing at a stone behind the pinkish force field in which were inscribed a few words : “To break the spell you must use the power of love. Be warned though, because the memories you wish to regain contain a monster.”

“Hmm, intriguing, we should try to see if the-”

“Luna ! Luna ! Second time this week you oversleep ! Are your nightly conversations that interesting ? Time to raise the mo-”

I woke up in my bed, blanket on the floor and cold. I stood up and went straight before the night's princess's room, waiting for Celestia to come out so I could get a word with Luna. Alas, I was standing too close to the door, and got hit by it right in the face. “Oh my ! I'm sorry.”

“No problem, Celly.” She shifted at the use of her nickname. “Sorry, I guess I shouldn't be using it, but I heard your sister say it several times and it just came out...”

“It's okay, it's just weird to here that from somepony else than Lulu. Erm, don't call her that, she won't like it if other ponies start to.”

At that moment the moon goddess stepped out of the door. “Let's eat breakfast, shall we ? We'll talk about your dream while eating.”

“So, why did the dream end so quickly this time ?”

“Because you lost focus, you started thinking about the enigma, and your subconscious took the opportunity to, again, speed up the dream.”

“You said I was good at dream forming, but why can't I just stop the time ? Is it my special weakness ?”

“Because time alteration in dreams is extremely difficult. Besides, what's a special weakness ?” She asked, curious.

“I don't know, something that would be the opposite of a special talent.”

“Oh.”

“And do you know what that riddle meant ? Because I don't.”

“No, but we have a lot of time to think about it, and, we can always try to bruteforce the lock with magic. That would take up a big of amount magic power, but I think I have enough to do it, since I’m a goddess.” She said with a sly grin.

“But... I though magic didn't exist in dreams, because you can directly can everything...”

“Yes, you can easily change dreams, without magic, but if I try to force those memories out, I’ll need my real magic, since I’m directly altering your mind.”

“That sounds risky, are you sure it's safe ?”

“Yes, it might, but only if your memories are, and I highly doubt that.”

“Okay, I trust you...”

/* Author's note: Sorry this one took so long, but there are some parts that I didn't want to seem rushed or anything (if something does, tell me, as always). The next one should come up this weekend, although I’m not sure when. And I’m going to bed now, I need my 6 hours sleep. */