Not Another Good Guy

Twilight paced around the library, thoughts running through her head at a million miles a second.

"How could I have been so stupid? I should never have assumed it was asleep."

"Uh-huh," said Spike as he watched her make her rounds. "If you keep pacing around the table, you'll wear a new moat into the floor." He could already see scuff marks that he was sure Twilight would have him getting rid of later.

"Spike! This is no time for joking around!"

"I'm not," he muttered as Twilight ignored him and continued berating herself.

"I may have just killed an entirely new species!"

Spike sighed with irritation. "Come on Twi, you know that creature did all that to itself. You didn't burn down the barn, it did."

"Yes Spike, but I'm the one who made the choice to alert the militia and tell them that we had a potentially dangerous creature on the loose. If I'd have just let him go, or even approached him on my own, then none of this would have happened. It's all my fault!"

A sudden knocking at the door interrupted them. Spike opened it to find the nurse from the hospital. "Twilight, it's the hospital pony."

He was immediately shoved out of the way as Twilight rushed to the door.

"Please tell me it's alright!"

The nurse grimaced and shifted awkwardly. Twilight simply looked at her hooves and wallowed in shame in the short silence that followed. After a few moments the nurse spoke.

"I'm sorry, Princess Sparkle, but the creature did not survive. It lingered for a while, unconscious, but did not recover from its wounds."

Twilight let out a deep sigh. "So... what now?"

He shrugged. "Last I checked, we didn't have many laws on corpse disposal for unidentified species. If nopony else has already done it, you could go and claim the body. You can still study it like you said you wanted to."

Twilight's face lit up at the thought, all previous concerns forgotten. "This is great! Spike, prepare my dissection supplies and some notes. We are about to perform a major contribution to the scientific community!"

Spike ran to do as she asked as she shoved past the confused nurse and made her way to the hospital. Twilight paused for a moment to shout, "FOR SCIENCE! I've always wanted to say that!" as other ponies stared at her in confusion.

The nurse looked back at Spike. "Does she always have such drastic emotional swings?"

"Yeah. You should see her when a book is put out of place on the shelf," Spike said.

"She's that extreme about it?" the nurse asked in disbelief. Spike did not even need to reply, as the look on his face said everything.

"Umm... alight then, I'll be off. Try not to let Twilight do anything too crazy with the creature, alright?"

One hour later, Twilight was ready to begin. It had been easy to get the body and transport it to the library basement. Of course she had banned Spike from watching; he would always be a baby dragon to her and she didn't know if he was ready to handle this big of a dissection. It could be... messy. That meant that she wouldn't have a helper, but she was confident in her ability.

With all preparations complete, Twilight levitated over the case of dissection tools and brought out the scalpel. It was obvious to see that Spike had not sharpened it like he was supposed to. It was an easy fix though, and she cast a spell to sharpen the edge. Twilight used her magic to bring a floating light closer as she brought the scalpel forward. The edge touched the creature's burnt flesh and-

Twilight gasped and nearly lost control of her magic, causing the light to wobble and the case to spill its contents. She checked again but found the same thing as before. Its chest rose and fell, albeit ever so weakly. It was still breathing.

I'm not sure how long I was out. I woke up feeling really funny all over and there was a really bright light all around me. It seems that I have died and gone to heaven. I chuckled weakly. Looks like somebody made a clerical error at the gates.

"Holy horseapples, it's alive! Okay Twilight, just calm down. Just calm down. Just calm down...”

"Repeating it won't change a thing," I remarked as I pushed at the light. It went out a moment later and my close surroundings came into view. Something smelled funny but I didn't stop to think about it. "What the hell did you do?"

She scoffed indignantly at me. "I could ask you the same thing! You burnt down a barn and put a pony in the hospital!" She stopped a moment before her attitude completely changed.

"I am having a conversation with a new species. A new intelligent species." I swear I could hear the gears in her brain turning as she contemplated that thought. "This is the greatest scientific discovery since Star Swirl the Bearded discovered time magic! I have to document everything!"

"How about you document the effects of burning alive? That's the only thing I really know about." I looked around as my blurry vision slowly got clearer. "Where am I anyway? This doesn't look like the hospital." I looked over at her. That was when I recognized her as the jerk who wanted to 'study' me.

"You brought me here to kill me, didn't you?" I growled out through gritted teeth.

"No, I swear!"

I could feel the slow pulse of rage quickening in my heart. "Letting me live wasn't good enough for you?!"

"You don't understand!"

"There is nothing to understand!"

"You were already dead!"

My anger cooled instantly into an icy fear that strangled my heart with its cold tendrils. "What did you just say?" I asked much more calmly than I felt.

The pony looked nervously at me. "Y-you died. In the fire. Last night. I brought your corpse here for disse-...study."

I wish I could say that I took this in stride with some witty comeback like, "I'm alive right now, how do you like them apples?" Instead, I lay there in silence as I considered what had been said. Maybe they didn't know how to properly determine death?

"Hey, purple."

Despite her previous guilt, she glared at me. "It's Twilight. Twilight Sparkle."

"Whatever, is it possible that one of your doctors incorrectly pronounced me dead?"

She shook her head at me. "We have a life detection spell just for that purpose. It is unfailing in accuracy."

Now that I've eliminated the practical answer, I guess I can only assume the insane... I really did die in that fire. Why am I alive again?

Twilight began putting away supplies as she brought out a notebook from somewhere. "I have so many questions to ask you! OK, what are your-"

"Hold up, I think I deserve to ask a couple questions before you do. It's only fair considering you tried to dissect me."

She hesitated a moment, then gave in. "Alright, what do you want to know?"

"There was another pony in the barn when it burned. Is it alright?"

She looked at me in surprise. "You saved Derpy?"

"I don't know. I dove into the sawdust to push one of them out of it just seconds before it went up. I would hate to think my death was for nothing."

The surprised expression remained on her face as she answered. "Yes, she survived. I think she is still in the hospital, but she is doing fine."

Well that's a relief. I'm glad that something good came out of last night.

"Where am I?"

If the surprise on her face got any heavier, I was sure it would peel off and fall to the floor. "You really don't know?" I just shrugged. "We are in the Ponyville library. Ponyville is a small town in the country of Equestria."

I don't think I have ever heard of those before. Damn, I had hoped that finding out where I was could trigger a memory. "I'm not familiar with those names. Alright Sparklers, ask away"

She rolled her eyes, but otherwise ignored the nickname. "Why did you save Derpy instead of assuring your own safety?"

"I don't know. It just seemed like the right thing to do at the time."

"Oh, okay. Are you resilient to pain?"

"No, why?"

"Then how do you not feel that?"

I frowned at her. "Feel what?"

She pointed a hoof at my chest. I looked down at myself for the first time since I had woken up, and I had to try not to throw up. The flesh was blackened and covered with lacerations. Looking down at the damage done to me, I knew I should not have been alive.

I forced my eyes away from the sight. "Well, that is an interesting development. I know that it SHOULD hurt, but it doesn't. Did you use some kind of painkillers or anesthetics on me recently?"

"Not that I know of. Like I said, you were dead last night and have been for at least eight hours."

I pushed myself up and ignored that sound of my crispy flesh crackling and breaking. As creepy as it is, I'm glad that I am not feeling any pain from this. "Sparklight, can I at least get out of this dungeon and get some food? I can't remember when I last ate."

She turned toward the staircase in the corner. "Alright, I guess it wouldn't hurt. It's just up these stairs to the kitchen."

"Before that, I only have one more question."

Curious, she looked back at me. "What is it?"

"Where the hell are my clothes?"

Ten minutes later, I sat fully clothed at a small table. I sat on a small stool so that I could be comfortable. The table was obviously not intended for seating someone of my body shape and size, but we managed to make it work. A purple dragon (I think his name was Spork. Something like that anyway.) was making food in the kitchen as Twinkle asked me questions.

"What are you?"

"I don't know."

"How old are you?"

"I don't know."

"Are there more of you?"

"I don't know."

"Does your species live in groups or do they prefer isolation?"

"I don't know."

"Don't you know anything!?" She shouted in frustration.

I fought back a laugh as I replied, "I don't know," and leaned back on the stool.

It was difficult not to find humor in her reaction. Her face was bright red as she fumed and dropped her floating notes onto the table. I could have sworn that at any second, she would burst into flames and I would burn to death again. Just as I thought she was about to snap, the dragon walked in with the food.

"Here you go, Twi. Hay fries and your favorite cucumber and daisy sandwich."

Anger forgotten, she beamed appreciatively at him. "Thanks Spike."

"Hey Twilight, I was wondering if-"

Twilight rolled her eyes and interrupted him. "Yes Spike, you can go gem hunting with Rarity."

"Thanks!" Spike was immediately out the door with a bucket in one hand and a shovel in the other. This must be a regular occurrence. Why would a dragon like gems anyway?

My grumbling stomach interrupted my thoughts. I picked up one of the fries and inspected it. It seemed harmless so I popped one in my mouth. I instantly regretted it.

Twilight paused in her eating and smiled at me. "Spike makes really good hay fries, doesn't he?"

I forced myself to swallow the nasty thing without shuddering. Not trusting my voice, I simply nodded and moved onto the sandwich. Please be edible, please be edible... On a hunch, I opened up the sandwich and removed the daisies.

When Twilight looked at me in confusion, I simply replied, "I have a very serious flower intolerance," and ate the bread and cucumbers instead. She accepted this without any visible doubt, much to my relief.

Once I was finished, the interrogation continued. "The way you use your hands reminds me of the minotaurs, except that you seem to have much greater dexterity with them. Can I look at them a bit closer?"

I suppose it couldn't hurt. I laid my hands out flat on the table in front of me as Twilight began taking notes.

"Can you show me how you use them? Just move them around a bit, I'm curious."

I amused her with cracking my knuckles, crossing and bending my fingers, and picking up random objects. After a while of this I noticed something odd about her and decided to ask, hoping that it wasn't a racist question.

"Sparkly, why is it that you have both a horn and wings while all the other ponies have only one or none at all?"

"It's a long story, but it's not normal for ponies to have both. We're called alicorns. I only know of three other alicorns in that are alive today, and they rule over a specific aspect of the world. Princess Celestia rules the sun, Princess Luna rules the moon, and Princess Cadence rules love."

It did not take long for me to realize the implications of being an alicorn. Lucky me, I was almost dissected by royalty. "So if each alicorn rules over something, what do you rule over?"

She fidgeted nervously and shrugged. Huh, must be a sensitive topic for her.

I looked over her wings and horn again. "Since you've gotten to study me a bit, is it fair if I ask a bit about you?"

"I don't see why not."

"Alright, can I touch your wings?"

"What?!" she yelled, her eyes widening in shock.

I raised my hands and backed up in the most non-threatening way possible. "I didn't mean anything by it, I was just curious as to what they feel like. As far as I know, I use touch as a means to understand things. Specifically, touch with my fingers."

She looked a bit less angry as she quizzically eyed me. "What do you mean 'As far as I know'?"

"I mean just that. When I kept telling you that I didn't know any answers to your questions, I was being completely serious. I had no memory at all when I woke up in a forest here," I said, trying to keep my voice as calm as possible.

I was really getting used to her confused face by this point. Maybe if I keep confusing her, it will freeze up like that.

Despite her confusion of my circumstances, she moved on. "Among pegasi, rubbing wings is a more-than-friendly gesture. I couldn't have expected you to know the implication of that question." She paused for a moment in thought. "Alright, you can touch them. Just this once, and be careful. They're very sensitive."

I moved over to her and very cautiously moved my hand to her wing. When my finger was just a few inches away, the universe flipped its shit again. An explosion of light and sound went off and I was thrown onto my back. Just when I thought it couldn't get worse, my flesh began to hurt. Everywhere that I had been burnt was glowing white and getting increasingly more painful. Within moments I was writhing in agony on the floor.

I am unashamed to say that I screamed. I screamed and screamed as pain consumed everything. I could hear Twilight yelling, but I couldn't make out what she was saying. This went on for about a minute until the pain gradually began to disappear. Twilight stopped panicking as she noticed that I was pulling out of whatever it was that had happened to me.

"Are you alright? What the heck was that?" I ignored her as I removed my shirt to examine my skin again. I shouldn't have been surprised by this point, but I still sat in shock as soft pink skin covered what used to be blackened flesh. I poked it cautiously. Yep, this isn't an illusion.

"Did you heal me?" I asked as I stood up and dusted myself off.

"No, I didn't do anything to you. Do you normally heal like that?"

I chuckled weakly. "Like I said before, I don't know. However, something like this did happen after I was hit by the trebuchet. The nurse claimed I had a large gash on my head and a cracked skull. When I unwrapped my bloody bandages, I did not have a single scratch on my body."

She scratched her chin in thought for a moment before responding. "I have never heard of any magic that works like that. I'll write to Celestia about it, she would know."

For some odd reason, I felt a sense of apprehension. "Sparkler, would I be correct in assuming that this 'Princess Celestia' is the ruler of this world?"

She nodded. "That is somewhat true. She is the more politically active member of the diarchic government. The other would be Princess Luna, but she tends to avoid the political aspect of her station."

I couldn't shake a feeling of unease about Celestia. "I'd rather you not tell them about my existence. I would like to stay out of the knowledge of your leaders."

"What?! Princess Celestia is the nicest pony in Equestria! What could you possibly have against her?"

Knowing a losing battle when I saw one and uncertain of my own unease, I relented to her wishes. "Fine, fine, just keep it simple."

I thought back on the craziness that I had encountered so far. It seems that I have been developing a disturbing trend of narrowly avoiding death. I really hope fate doesn't have too many more of those in store for me...

I looked at my healed skin again. I didn't have any way to be sure, but I was fairly certain that I didn't normally heal like that. Somehow everything that had been burnt away had been completely restored. That reminds me of something else.

"Hey, Sparkle? You said I burnt down that barn?"

She got a peculiarly serious look on her face. "Yes, the entire barn is gone."

"I would like to meet the owner of the barn. Since I burned it down, I want to fix it."

"You don't have to do that, you know." When I didn't respond, she continued. "While it is true that whatever you did set the barn on fire, we were the ones who came after you without any proper reason to. Just because we didn't understand what you were is no excuse for sending the militia after you."

I was having some really mixed emotions about this. While the rational part of my mind told me that I needed to right my wrongs, another part of me was arguing against my altruism. Why should I care about these ponies when they have only done me harm?

"No." I shocked myself with the conviction I spoke with.

"What?" The confused look was back again. It seems that body language is extremely important in their communication. That would explain why she seems to flip between emotions so quickly.

"That's wrong." I continued on before I lost my motivation. "What you said, that is. It is true that you ponies made a serious mistake in reasoning when you sent armed guards after me. However, it was my choice and my choice alone to start that fire. I won't let myself make excuses to get out of the results of my actions, and I damn well won't let someone --um, pony, I guess-- else make excuses for me."

She looked about as stunned with my response as I felt about it. I simply had the better poker face. What the heck is poker, anyway?

"I'm sorry, I wasn't aware you felt that way. Most ponies in your situation would have gladly opted out of the responsibility. Despite everything you have gone through, you still want to help?"

"Yes," I said. It's not like this is an action of pure goodness. I need to do this is so that I can stay on the good side of these ponies. As weird as everything is already, I need to have as few enemies as possible. That is, until I understand their capabilities.

"Alright then, I'll send a short letter to the princess --I know, I know, I'll keep it simple-- and then I'll show you the way to Sweet Apple Acres," she said as her horn flared up with light and objects flew around the room. "While the doctors were unable to save your life last night, your strange bags and clothing were easily saved with a repairing spell. Don't worry, nopony has gone through your belongings yet."

The backpack landed on the floor in front of me with a dull thud as Twilight quickly jotted down a letter. "I'll write a note for Spike to send this letter when he gets back and we'll go meet Applejack, the owner of the barn."

We headed outside a few minutes later. I stepped out into the midday sun and stretched my limbs. I slung my backpack over my shoulders as Twilight locked the door. The weight of it on my back was familiar and comforting. As we took our first steps towards the farm, I felt surer of myself. I knew I was ready for anything.

Princess Celestia was enjoying one of the rare days in life: Castle maintenance day. While the organization and cleanliness was important, it was not what gave her such joy. Since Day Courts were closed on maintenance day, she could spend more time relaxing without troubling herself with the squabbling of the nobles.

The castle chefs, knowing that today was a special day for their princess, had baked a marvelous cake to help her enjoy her day off. She had just cut herself a slice and was about to bite into the sweet, delicious-

*POP*

Celestia looked up from her food with mild annoyance. The letter that had been sent had the worst luck of appearing halfway inside the chocolate layering.

"Who would send me a letter on my day off?" She muttered to herself as the wrapped the letter in her magic and brought it to her. Unraveling it and scraping off the cake lightened her heart as she saw it was from her favorite student.

"Let's see what friendship lesson you learned today, Twilight Sparkle..."

The letter gave her pause as she noticed that it was uncharacteristically short. Normally Twilight enjoyed giving lengthy, detailed explanations. This letter was short, quick, and to the point. Her worry increased as she read the brief description of the strange creature that had appeared. By the end of the letter, she understood exactly what had happened.

"Guards!"

The two guards who were always posted at her door were at her side immediately. "What is it, Princess?"

No trace of her usual kindness was visible as she gave her orders. "Summon Luna to the throne room at once. We shall be departing for Ponyville as soon as possible, without the guard."

The guards seemed about to protest, but Celestia gave them no choice. "You may not accompany me. What my sister and I must do is far too dangerous for even you," she said as she turned and looked out the window as the sun slowly trekked its way to the horizon.

"Twilight Sparkle, I can only hope you are safe."