Chapter 7_Puppeteers

Chapter 7

“Hey! Hey! Pay attention.” A cocky, but soothing male voice begins.

Oh, of course the blackness wants to talk.  It ALWAYS wants to talk.  I really need to cut down on the alcohol, my head makes up the weirdest stuff after a few drinks.

I throw my blanket off as I get off my bed.  It sinks into nothingness, leaving me alone in an enveloping darkness.  That's worrying.  I try to get my bearings, only to find blackness in all directions.

“So, who are you exactly? A ghost of Hearth’s Warming Eve or something?”

“No, sorry my little stallion, I guess you could say I’m your guiding light.”

I scoff.  “That sounds really cliché.”

“Shut up, and listen for a bit you jackass.  Tonight you will be visited by three ghosts… wait scratch that, that’s the other thing.”

“Can’t I just have a dream about mares or something fun like that?”  I respond pleadingly.

“Where is the fun in that?”  My head drops in response.

“Alright fine, what’s this big revelation I need to know?  Is it obvious like, don’t piss of the Elements, or is more cryptic like, avoid apples?” That would suck.

“You’re going to die in 3 weeks.”

“WHAT?!?!?!”  My eyes widen in terror, and my heart jumps into my throat.

“Oh, are you done cracking jokes now?  Can I continue?  You aren’t going to die in 3 weeks,” I calm down and exhale, “just wanted your attention.  Now then, I need you to invite the Elements to a party, and get them absolutely tanked.”

“Two things about that, firstly you?  I thought you were here to help me in some sort of way.  Secondly, why in Equestria would I get those mares drunk?”

“Takes all the inhibitions away from a certain orange pony?”

“…tempting, but come on is that all you can give me?”

“Hmph,” the voice’s response seemed annoyed, “Do I have to remind you, I’m your guiding light!  Guiding (pause for effect) Light!”  I shrug in response.  “Fine, look into grapes.  You can make something wonderful with them.”

I ponder some before responding, “Why have you waited this long to guide me?”

“What makes you think I haven’t been guiding you this entire time?”

His voice was becoming distant during that statement.

“Cryptic flank guiding light!” I yell in response.

Discord just laughs.

Benjy

I woke up with a start this morning.  I jump up and look around, to find my room just how I left it last night.  I haven’t gotten around to making this my room mine yet.  The only real things of color in here are my signed poster of Spitfire, framed on the wall, and some of my art supplies.  I lay back down after the look around.  My body is still sore from yesterday.  Working pretty consistently throughout yesterday was a bitch; I’m just glad the day ended.  I stretch my wings, trying to get my blood flowing.  I stretch my other limbs too a little bit, before my bed decides for itself that it’s far too comfortable for me to get up currently.  Oh you dirty mare, I’ll stay with you forever.  I just hope I don’t have that dream about the guiding light again…

"AHHHHHHHG!" A yell comes from downstairs.

I try to jump out of bed, only to have the comforter wrap around my leg, causing me to faceplant.  I'll complain about that later.  I free myself from the blanket.  (Bad girl!  Equestria needs me!)

I fly as fast as I can down stairs, only to find Bacchus messing around with a bunch of distilling equipment and... grapes?

"WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! What the buck am I supposed to do with this useless fruit?"  He is angry at grapes.  This is new.

"Hey buddy?  What are you up to?" He looks up and sees me, his anger and frustration quickly soften up.

He holds a hoof up to his head before responding.  "I'm sorry about the noise brony.  I've been trying to make something with these grapes, but this really isn't going well."  He goes back to tinkering with the distiller before continuing, "I seem to only be making bad grape juice!"

I cross my hooves across my chest while still in the air.  "Why?  You scared me half to death with your yelling earlier!"

Bach made a slow, sweeping motion with one of his hoofs, "I saw it in a dream."

I shake my head and laugh, "So what you need me to do today bosspony?"

He waves me away, "Go find a waiter for us, go hit on some unsuspecting mare, go find inner peace.  I don't care.  You just can't stay here.  I need to figure this out and you're distracting me."

Oh hes in one of his "inventive" moods.  Well hes not going to be social until he gets this right or he passes out from hunger.  He can be stubborn when he gets this way.  I fly back up to my room to get ready for the day.  My morning routine takes a good while, I preen my feathers and fix my hair.  Taking my time to get everything in place and tidy.  Looking this damn good totally distracts girls from my glaring personality flaws.  Ha! Self burn!

The beautification process is completed in due course.  Now then, what sounds good?  I guess I could make some help wanted posters and hang them around town.  I also want to spend time with some mares in particular, I don't care what any white Unicorn or dream says.  Benjy does what he pleases.

I grab some of my art supplies and take it over to my desk so I can get started.  Hmmmm now how in Equestria should I word this?  Using some of the best handwriting I can muster I make a few practice fliers before I settle on one that's short, sweet, and to the point.

I pick up the flier and go over it checking for spelling errors.  Ahhh banish it!  I used the wrong your.  I hate when I do that.  One simple rewrite later and we finally have a workable flier.  Alright, step one COMPLETE!  Well... lets go hang these bad colts up.  I put them in my saddle bag along with a few tacks to put them up.  I walk down the stairs to find Bacchus still working on his grape solution.

"Alright, I'm off to hang some posters."  A bunch of grapes sail at me.

"No distractions!"

First things first, I walk outside and tack the first one on the bar door.  Hopefully, we get someone fun... or maybe some pretty young mare.  My smile gets bigger at this point.  I shake my head, I need to finish this up so I can get on to something fun.

I unfold my wings and stretch each one individually.  My wings begin to flap as I soon take flight.  Best part of my day so far.  The freedom of the open sky, the carefree feeling of being alone in the sky,  and of course the wonderfully comfy clouds.  Oh Celestia it is good to be a pegasus.

I fly up to a cloud when I get close to town.  I can relax a bit before I actually put up some posters.  No need to get my work done too early.  When I get closer to the cloud I notice a rainbow colored tail hanging off the side of the cloud.  Hmmmmm,  now how should I play this?  I could prank her, that would be tons of fun.  Lets see... I look around and see exactly what I've been looking for, there is a cloud that looks heavily laden with rain.

I fly off towards the cloud landing on top of and gripping it with all four hooves using my wings to propel it back towards Dash.  As I make my way back I notice that her cloud is now empty... where in Equestria did tha*ZAP* A bolt of lightening hits my tail frying the end.

I could smell the stagnant odor of burned hair.  My glare turns up to see a smirking Rainbow Dash on a cloud far above me.

"You can't prank the prank master!"

"Touche RD, Touche." She flies down to my cloud positioning her self next to me.

"Hey Benjy, what you up to today?  You know besides getting your flank pranked hardcore by yours truly." She still has a smug grin on her face.

I'd be mad at her for ruining the end of my tail if she weren't so damn attractive.  You've got to love that sleek, athletic body and those beautifully deep fuchsia eyes.  My eyes wander over her body stopping on her flank.  I can feel my wings try to flare open.  I concentrate trying to keep them at my sides.  My eyes return to hers finding her with an even bigger smile.

"Oh those wandering eyes!  If you wanted to have a go you should have just asked!"  She nuzzles into my neck and my wings extend with an audible *POMF*.

"Ha! Got you a second time today Benjy.  You are far too easy!"  Rainbow Dash says as she jumps off the cloud into the air.  "Come back to me when you've got some actual game!"  She turns and flies towards town.

Oh damn, I just got played.