The CMC Listen to Diamond Tiara

Along a silent, dusty road, there was nary a pony in sight. Being flanked on this minute stretch of land would possibly be the ultimate sign of ignorance of one’s surroundings, and for this expressed purpose it was suitable to delay any potential ambush. Diamond Tiara strode along this solitary street on her way to the school house, perpetually cautious lest she be caught unaware yet again by the troublesome Cutie Mark Crusaders.

She turned a corner and the school house was in sight now. She knew that if she just arrived, she would be protected by the almighty rule above all else that expressly forbid speaking in class. Only then would she find sanctuary. She drew closer and closer, practically only a few steps away. And then the CMC popped out of a spider hole in the ground in front of her, forcing her into a state of shock that was so very great it froze her in place.

“Hey Diamond Tiara!” The three said all at the same time.

Applebloom raised a most inquisitive eyebrow, which became so very inquisitive that it infected the rest of Applebloom with an inquisitive nature. “Hey, Diamond Tiara, are you alright?” She inquired, tapping the stiff filly. Diamond Tiara’s form became unsteady and fell on it’s side, still perfectly rigid.

“I think she’s dead. Should we still break the news?” Sweetie asked as the three gathered over the body and loomed over it.

“No time like the present!” Scootaloo said to Sweetie before looking down and speaking directly to the petrified Diamond Tiara. “Listen, we decided that since we didn’t have any luck with your ideas, we may as well stick with our own. It’s getting sorta exhausting going back and forth and looking all over for you. Well, seeya!” And with that the three all bid her farewell and entered the school house.

Diamond Tiara awoke several moments after they had finally disappeared and the thought had reached her that she was free at last! Oh glory to all, she was free from the constant badgering of those three! She go up and wiped her brow with the back of her hoof, and felt an immense burden fall free off her. Now she would go on from this day as a free filly, no, a free mare! But then Silver Spoon, her best friend, showed up.

“Hey DT! I bet you missed me, huh? Yeah, the hospital was pretty lame, but now I’m finally out and we can get our revenge on those three brats!”

Diamond Tiara simply entered the school house and Silver Spoon followed, and everything went back to the way it was. Minus a train full of orphans, much of Rarity’s bone structure, one angry german ruler and one U.S. President, and an entire youth’s winter that should have been spent with family instead spent in the paws of a giant, fluffy bear whilst tripping on cave mushrooms.

The moral of the story is never listen to Diamond Tiara, even if she is not a duck.