A Strange New World

"Oh fuck! Oh fuck, what the fuck is this shit!?" Exclaimed Joey looking at the two young girls before him. The first girl was about five feet and six inches, and had very straight hair. The hair was very peculiar in color, because it contained not only one color, but a rainbow that cascaded through each and every follicle to make an array of color that was very pleasing to the eye. Her skin was mostly white with some bruises and scratches littered around in various places on her arms, legs, and chest, which was bare for neither of them were wearing any clothes.

The second girl was slightly taller at five feet and seven inches. Her bright pink hair was done in an insane matter. There were no patterns, it was just a mess of puffy pink hair. Her eyes were a pale blue, and her skin was just as white as the other girl's, but she did not have any scratches or marks on her near perfect skin.

"This can't be happening, this just can't be fucking happening." said Joey holding his short brown hair in his hands whilst pacing back and forth like a mad man.

"What can't be happening?" said the girl with the pink hair looking at him perplexedly. She then looked down at her now more slender and flesh covered body and let out a loud shriek. "What is wrong with my body! What is this! Where are my hooves, and what are these things?!" Exclaimed the Pink haired girl looking down at her hands. "This can't be real, I'm dreaming right Rainbow Dash?" She said whilst looking at the girl with the long rainbow colored hair.

"Pinkie Pie stop it!" said Rainbow Dash clumsily grabbing hold of Pinkie Pie's shoulder. "We need to keep calm if we are going to get through this, we just need to." She said suddenly stopping when she met Joey's dark blue and slightly bloodshot eyes.

Joey was wearing a plain black T-shirt, and navy blue jeans. He wore no socks or foot coverings of any kind, so his coarse feet were clearly visible to the two girls.

"What the heck are you!?" Screamed Rainbow Dash whilst looking at Joey with a look in here eyes that was a combination of crippling fear, and intense rage. "Who the heck are you?!" She said still screaming with the same intensity.

"I could ask you the same damn thing!" Said Joey yelling back at the girl who was still laying on his rough wood apartment floors. "You know what? That is what I am asking you! Who the fuck are you?" He said still yelling at the rainbow haired girl. "I mean you are in my fucking house!"

That moment a a deep voice came through the dry wall, and yelled "Shut the fuck up in there! It's three in the damn morning, and people are trying to sleep."

Joey took a deep breath, and said once again "Alright, who are you two? I'm not mad that you somehow broke into my house, just please tell me who you are so I can drink some bleach, and hopefully kill the part of my brain that is making you two."

Pinkie said whilst holding herself up with her arms and legs, "My name is Pinkie Pie, and this is Rainbow Dash."

Rainbow Dash stood up in a similar manner, and said "Well you know our names, now what's yours?" She still looked at him in a hostile manner, and spoke to him in a similar manner.

"My name is Joey, and I'm assuming you also want to know where you are?"

"Okay two things: one, yes, we want to know where we are, we only asked twice. Two, what kind of name is Joey?!" Rainbow Dash said, now laughing lightly at the man standing before her.

"I could ask you the same thing about your names." Said Joey looking at the two girls who were still completely naked. "I mean what kind of name is Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie? Those sound like the names of a fucking horse or an ass or something. Now, I'm tired, you are obviously real, so please put some damn clothes on."

"May I ask why?" Said Rainbow Dash whom seemed confused about the prospect of wearing clothing casually, and not on special occasions such as the arrival of a political figure, or a formal dance or ball.

"You need to wear some damn clothes, because you can't just be wandering around naked like that. You got a nice body, but still you're gonna get arrested if you walk outside like that."

Joey walked over to a closet, and pulled out two pairs of jet black sweatpants, and two large black T-shirts.

He tossed them to the two girls, and said, " Here, put these on. Also, could you please stop walking on all fours. It makes you look like an animal."

The two awkwardly dressed themselves on the ground without standing, and Pinkie Pie said with a beaming grin, "Thanks!"

The pants barely stayed on them, and the shirt was much to large for their thin frames.

"Wait what do you want us to do, stand up? We are standing up." Said Rainbow Dash, sounding very sure of herself as she stood on her arms and legs."

"No, I mean like how I am standing." Said Joey standing perfectly straight to show a good example of how to stand upright properly.

The two girls struggled for a few minutes, and fell on their backs multiple times, but finally they were balances, and standing up right.

"Thanks Joey!" Yelled Pinkie Pie in a very high pitched and sporadic tone.

"That's fucking it!" Screamed the voice from the other side of the drywall, "I'm coming over, and I am going to fuck you up!"

Moments later a large man busted down the small wooden door, and into the living area where the group had meandered to moments ago. He had a rough face, with a large beard that covered everything, but his neck. He had a whiskey bottle in his, a wood cutting axe in his other. He was about six feet tall, and looked like he weighed in at two hundred pounds with a small beer belly.

He threw the whiskey bottle in his hand, and it shattered on the hard ground littering the shards within a five foot vicinity where the bottle landed.

He began staring at Joey, and held the axe in both of his rough and scarred hands, and then he charged at him with the heavy and rusted blade being held over his head.

Joey dodged the maniacs first charge, and bolted into the kitchen. He began frantically looking through his cabinets, until he found a pot with a viscous blue liquid in it.

"Hell yeah" Muttered joey as he ate a large glob of it.

Instantly his eyes dilated, and two large fangs grew from his canines. The teeth dropped out of his mouth, and were as long as a tigers, and twice as sharp.

The man rushed into the kitchen, and swung again. Joey swiftly dodged, and pulled a carrot out of a drawer, took a bite out of, and said, "What's up doc." before swiftly shoving it in his ear.

Joey ran out into the living room where Pinkie Pie lay hiding behind the couch from the whole fiasco, but Rainbow Dash was no where to be seen.

In the midst of scanning the room for the rainbow haired girl, he took a swing from the axe to his back.

"Fuck!" Exclaimed Joey now laying on the ground bleeding. "Hey man have you ever heard of the song Bloodrocuted, well I'll tell you one thing; blood is an energy condenser, and you are my outlet!"

Joey quickly grabbed a plug, and nearly plugged it into his wound, but then Rainbow Dash came out of no where, and hit him upside the head with a black iron frying pan.

"Dammit Rainbow Dash!" Said looking aggravated. "I had my one liner, I had my plug, and well I guess that's it, but still couldn't you have let me do it."

"First of all, why the heck are you complaining about me saving your life?! Whoa! You're bleeding, a lot! Where the heck is a hospital?!" Said Rainbow Dash no longer worrying about anything, but making sure the creature before her didn't bleed out.

"I'll be fine, just grab that." Said Joey pointing to a syringe with a clear liquid in it sitting on the coffee table.

Rainbow Dash complied, and said "How is that going to help?"

Joey Replied with, "Don't worry it will fix me up."

Joey then injected the liquid into his wound, and his now normal looking eyes dilated once again, and his wound began releasing a jet black liquid that spilled out profusely. The liquid began to harden, and rushed back to the wound, and began to stitch together the massive gash that was created by the axe.

"What the.." Said Rainbow Dash unable to complete her sentence in awe of what she was seeing,

"Oh this? This is child-play."

"Who did you say you were again?" Said Pinkie poking her out from behind the couch.

"I'm Joey, but I do have a title. I am the Southwest Voodoo Wizard, and looking at you two, and this might be the trauma from the axe wound, and the whatever the hell you call what just stitched me up, but I think we are all going to be good friends."

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