A Whimper in the Darkness

by Rysonn
This is a grimdark story following the story of Twilight as she tries to cofess her love to Luna.

I wrote this story nearly six months ago. A friend of mine on dA pushed me into writing a shipping story, and so i started one. Half way through, i got some... pretty bad news about one of my friends, and it all went wrong. At that point, the whole story went to hell, and so i revised the beginning, and threw it online. A few people liked it, to my surprise, and so i'll put it here.

Again, bear in mind that this was written almost six months ago, and is awfully written, even compared to my works.(the more recent ones, at the least). However, even though I've already improved a bunch, i'd like to hear your opinion on both the story and the writing.

Oh, and i know, it's really short, that's how i used to work, and still do, to some extent. Also, don't comment on the contradiction to the title at the end, please. I've known of it all along, i was just too lazy to find another title.

Teen
Complete
Sad
Gore
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Dark
 
PTP

1136 words: Estimated 6 minutes to read

1 Chapter:

  1. Chapter 1 2012-03-13 21:27:26 UTC
    1136