Why Galaxy s4 is better then iPhone 5

As the earth burned beneath her, the pony with wings fluttered through the smoke. The earth was getting much too badass. It was getting in her way. It was filled with too much color like her mane. It was trying to be Rainbow Dash but SHE was Rainbow Dash. Because she was Rainbow Dash.

She adjusted her new authentic batman cape and continued to fly, she had killed Batman. She had killed him like a sea puppy, while super man and the flash had kinky gay sex thoughts parties in the other room. Batman cried for help but there would be no help.

Only gay sex and death.

She left a live frog on the corpse of Batman – she hated this frog. Its name was Tiffany. What kind of a name was Tiffany? She knew tiffany loved Batman with all her heart – Rainbow dash hated Tiffany.

Rainbow dash landed in a field of flowers, it reminded her of other flowers she had seen the day before she set the whole world on fire.

Her Batman cape touched them and made them die because the dead soon to be raped body of Batman had given it the power to kill innocent flowers. Rainbow dash liked this. Raindow dash is awesome. Because she was rainbow dash.

Rainbow dash then pulled from a mysterious pocket in her fur pony side thing, an iPhone 5. She was the only pony who had one – fat Thor brought it to her through her Rainbow fridge earlier that day because he farted too aggressively and what popped out was a phone.

She tapped over the screen with her hoof, and it made the screen break. The phone was dying from a slashed screen.

She could not let it die. She had already given it a back story and everything, she had called it Orange because it annoyed the fuck out of her and undeservingly got a show on cartoon network before having sex with a strawberry and turning into a phone inside Thor’s Ass cheeks.

She ran in a desperate attempt to save her phone, she tripped on a sword but did not fall down because she is Rainbow Dash and wasn’t even running anyways – she was flying with her feet wings. She found a sword – waved it over the phone who was typing out its last will – killing the death demons upon it
.

She was so over joyed from saving her phone that she read the last will of the iPhone five that smelled of pancakes and the avengers movie. To her dismay, the phone was going to leave its whole fortune to Fat Thor!

Rainbow dash then wrapped the phone in her Batman cape of death and threw it into a river. As bubbled popped out of the water like popcorn she smiled as the words came from the buttery spheres as they popped. It was something about a wrecking ball and pony Miley Cyrus showing off her abnormally large nipples.

Rainbow dash then pulled a rolled up waffle in her mouth and lite it like a cigarette, these were pony cigarettes. She smoked it. she smoked it like a badass without syrup.

What did she look like? Canadian? Well maybe a little. But she was Rainbow dash and that canceled out the Justin Bieber blood running through her veins.

She took a long rainbow drag and then muttered.

“Pony porn”