A Chessmaster and his Game

"LYRA, what the buck is wrong with you?" Twilight snapped, not happy at all with the mint green unicorn's behavior.

"I'm sorry, I just got so excited and jumped at the chance to meet a real human," she looked down at the collapsed man, "Hi human, I have so many questions for you!" she informed giddily, not noticing that the tall man was unconscious.

"Lyra..." Twilight weakly protested.

"Is it true that human's have a tail bone, but no tail?" the green unicorn asked, thinking up another question.

"Lyra," the lavender unicorn persisted.

"OOH, is it true that a human's bones are harder than concrete? Or that they can lift many times their bodyweight?" the golden-eyed mare continued.

"Lyra!" the amethyst-eyed mare attempted.

"OOH OH OOH, is it true that human's can breed at any time?" the lyrist asked.

"LYRA!" the mage shouted, finally catching the musician's attention, "He's out cold, and he probably has a concussion, you caused this, so you help me fix it!" Twilight was mad at how quickly this simple tour had gone to shit.

"I know, I have a spell that switches species!" the green unicorn flared up her magic and began to cast the spell.

"Wait what? No DON-" the lavender mare was cut off by the sound of magic and a large flash of golden light.

Before was now a seafoam-and-white haired woman wearing the same clothes that Jackson had been wearing, her skin was somewhat tanned, on her right hand was a black, four-pointed star surrounded by green lines, and right above her left elbow was a little picture of a lyre.

"What the-OH dear Celestia it WORKED! IT WORKED!" the new humanized Lyra jumped for joy, instantly falling on her knees and letting out a yelp of pain.

Jackson groaned as his head healed a lot faster than normal, and he went to stand up, only to fall on all fours.

His eyes were still jade and his hair was still burnt-brown, but now he had a coat of fur the color of sand and a cutie mark of four quills with different colored barbs.

One was blood red, one was urine yellow, one was tears blue, and one was semen white.

How he knew this, it was the symbol of P1, though in between the four quills, which were pointed outwards in the four cardinal directions, were chess pieces.

A gray knight, gray bishop, gray rook, and gray queen, with gray pawns in a circle around the whole thing, and a gray king connecting the four quills.

"Das booty, though, but SIEG HELLLLLL NO! I'm not getting cheated!" with the power of 'Survivor Strength of Assimilation' coursing through his now equine veins, the still-pretty-tall stallion used this power to his advantage.

Since he had survived the 'species swap' spell, he could now use it, and he cast it at the offending woman, switching them back.

His clothes mostly stayed on Lyra for some reason, leaving him standing there in only his boxers as he practically ripped his garments off of the pony and put them on.

Twilight noticed that the man's left elbow now had the large cutie mark that he had only a moment ago, signifying that his special talent was.... whatever that huge symbol meant.

With all of his clothes back on, he flicked the base of Lyra's horn, causing the bony appendage to let out a streak of sparkles before fizzling out, "I swear if you ever do that spell on me again, I'm going to smack you in the face SO HAAAAARRRD!" he left it at that, looking at the little filly in the kitchen, "Hello there little one, how are you doing today?" he asked politely as he side-vaulted over the bottom half of the bakery's door, walking into the kitchen that was filled with the smells of baked goods.

Applebloom got starry-eyed with childish glee at this new discovery, "Howdy mister, I'm fine, my name's Applebloom, who are you?" she asked, remembering her manners and introducing herself first.

"My name is Jackson McCard, I'm twenty six years old and what is this?" he asked, gesturing to the various failed attempts at baking laying strewn across the room.

"Oh, I was trying to get a baking cutie mark, but it didn't work," the little filly lamented, looking at the flour-stained floor in sadness.

"Y'know what else doesn't work? Not me!" Pinkie Pie butt in, lifting Applebloom's chin and looking up at the tall human.

"Wow mister, you're really, REALLY tall!" she noted, jumping up to his eye-level.

"Thanks for noticing," the jade-eyed man did pride himself on his great height, even though it could be a hassle sometimes.

"I've never seen you in town before," Pinkie informed, still bouncing up to his eye-level.

"Well, that makes sense, since I've only been in Equestria for a few months, since the summer, and I haven't left Canterlot until today.

"Oh, that does make a lot of sense, well, anyways, whatever. HI I'm Pinkie Pie and I didn't throw this party for you, but I'll throw you a welcome party soon, I just have to finish up this one, speaking of which, get in there, Bloom!" the master of ceremonies cheered as she pushed the little yellow earth pony into the main room of the bakery.

"So, you're Jackson McCard, a sad, lonely guy who abandoned his friends and family because he couldn't accept that his country was getting better, y'know that's really crazy, and mean, and both of those mean a lot when they're comin' from me!" the blue-eyed mare informed, having read Jackson's backstory paragraphs.

"How did you know that, how do you know anything about me besides my name?" the sane-at-the-moment man was feeling insanity creeping up on him.

"Didn't you see the narrator? I read your backstory paragraphs, and I gotta say that you shouldn't go insane, it's not nice at all," the cheery pink pony explained.

Dammit Pinkie I thought I told you, no breaking the fourth wall

Heehee, now I'm breaking the sixth wall!

How'd you know about there was a sixth, or even a fifth wall, to begin with?

Easy peezy lemon squeezy, the first three walls are the setting of the content, the fourth wall divides the entities in the content from those viewing it, the fifth wall divides 'content a' from 'content b', the fifth wall is usually broken in crossovers, and the sixth wall divides entities such as myself from things like the narration, the credits, and the creators, by the way, nice work *P1*, though having your name being in bolded letters every time it's said is kinda narcissistic if ya ask me, hey, wanna go get some cupcakes?

"Ugh, you're very presence makes my head hurt," Jackson groaned, feeling a phantom of P1's head pain.

"Okay, sorry, I didn't mean to do that, anyways, you were saying?" the party mistress queried, still bouncing up and down in front of the tall man.

"Right, I was going to say that it's nice to meet you, but I fear for my sustained sanity's health when I think about you, I'll still take you up on that party offer, though, you're a good egg and a great pony," the warrior complimented, finally getting down on one knee to be eye level with the pink earth pony.

"Thanks, will you be my friend?" Pinkie asked in a hopeful voice.

"I think I can dismiss any... rationalizations about anything you may do... that I may have in my head, so sure, why not?" Jackson accepted, walking over to the doorway from the kitchen to the main room, seeing a little party with a lot of various fillies and colts having a good time, probably school-aged, judging by their size.

*thud*

Suddenly the somewhat chipper tune in the room was cut off with a *BRRUUUP* scratching of the needle as it was knocked off of the desired track and onto a new one.

*collective gasping*

Jackson saw Applebloom in a heap against a table, her mark-less flank exposed to the world.

"Ha hah ah ha hah ha, WOW, that IS an amaaaaazing cutie mark," Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon mocked, already front and center at this prime bullying opportunity, "*fit of laughter* Nice try, BLANK-FLANK," they said at the same time.

The next several seconds were filled with both of the little bullies alternating between laughing and chanting 'blank-flank'.

"Y'know, why are ya so mean?" the red-maned filly asked the armor-piercing question.

"Because, as a blank-flank, you aren't special, not special at all, you have no special talent, so you're not special," Diamond explained as if it were as obvious as the fact that trees are made of wood.

"Oh I'm special alright, I know a guy, and he's tough," Jackson immediately caught on to the plan, Applebloom was trying to get him to back her up.

He could never deny someone a high-five, even if it were Darth Vader, or Hitler, or both of them, while rapping. He couldn't deny the epicness of this possible bro-move.

"Snips or snails don't count, y'know," Silver countered.

"Oh he's not Snips or Snails, he's really big, he's a grown stallion, and he'd back me up if he were here," the orange-eyed filly noticed that everypony was too caught up in staring at the trio that they wouldn't notice the big monkey guy coming into the fray.

She made a very tiny, and subtle, 'come on' gesture, right as the bullies kept on, "Well, if he's not here, then where is he? I wanna meet this mysterious pony,"

"Not a pony," Applebloom whispered, though not quiet enough to go unheard, "What was that?" Diamond demanded.

"I said, not a problem, he's actually really nearby, and when you see him, you can't miss him,"

"Well come on then, nearby where? Let's go find him then." Diamond had tempted fate more than anypony or anything else in the world at that moment

~Meanwhile, in Saddle Arabia~

*whistle whistle* I'cha'bon whistled as he trotted along, looking up at the beautiful, clear night sky, not seeing a huge, gaping hole a few meters in front of him or the desert beasts quickly approaching him.

"Y'know, the best thing about walking forwards at night, is that you never need to look forward, down, or to the sides, and you can walk alone and be perfectly fine," he said, tempting fate more than any little, pink, annoying, school-aged foal of a pony could at the moment.

~Meanwhile, back to the millisecond after Diamond's statement, back in Equestria~

Diamond had probably tempted fate more than anypony or anything else in the world at that moment.

A brief moment had passed, a half a second needed for Jackson to kneel down as low as he could and think of a phrase to quote.

Applebloom looked to be on the verge of running away while leaking tears,

"Well come on, where is he?" Diamond persisted.

"Let's go find him," Silver added.

Too easy.

"Right behind you," came the voice, exactly like the spy, even the same amount of French accent.

Diamond and Silver immediately spun around and looked at the beast in front of them in fear.

That fear amplified as they were picked up by the scruff of their necks and lifted to eye-level with the tall man.

Almost seven feet in the air seems like a whole lot when you're about one-and-a-half feet tall.

The burnt-brunette dropped the accent and got down into a whisper, "Alright, look, Diamond Titties and Silver Sperm, I don't care who you think you are, I hate bullying, and I just want to warn you, I have no qualms about persecuting offenders of my moral standing, so we're going to have a peaceful time on the grounds of the 'talk shit, get hit' policy, agreed? You don't have any other choice, now act natural, everypony is either shocked or suppressing laughter," the warrior explained, his point firm and face uncompromising, and not mentioning that the only pony doing the b.

"O-o-okay, alright, I'll accept that." Diamond and Silver ignored the bastardization of their names when they saw the machete strapped to the human's left hip, they may have been young but they had seen such a tool before, granted it was used by Diamond's dad's gardener, but they had still seen some stuff done with such a thing.

Jackson chuckled and gently set the two little ponies on the floor, "You two have a nice party," he said, walking towards the snack table.

Everypony was still mostly shocked, but a friendly smile and a gesture of 'I mean no harm' put their worries to rest as he simply grabbed a few cupcakes and walked out the front door.

Strolling over to a bench outside, Jackson looked at one of the four cupcakes he had grabbed and began thinking.

"I used to be so patriotic, I would madly wave my little flag around when I was young, go to all of the parades I could, my friends used to call me Captain America Jr., because he was, and nowadays is, my favorite superhero," he said while idly ripping off the bottom half of the cupcake and licking off the icing around the edges.

"So bold, so brave, so heroic, a kind-hearted man pursuing the good ol' 'Liberty and Justice for all' goal, the movie a couple years ago really amplified his 'Badass with a Heart of Gold' thing, almost like a 'Papa Wolf' to every civilian in the world. He hated bullies and sought to stop antagonists from antagonizing people, as he felt that all conflict in the would is sourced at vanity, thinking that you're better than someone else simply because of material or ideological factors," he sighed, smushing the bottom half of the cupcake onto the icing top and eating it like a sandwich.

"Equestria is actually a lot like America in the whole 'freedom' thing, I haven't seen a single pony, or other species, in all of Canterlot, and so far in Ponyville, laying out like a bum without a home, I haven't had to deal with any crimes in my late night trips through the streets, no murders, no theft, not even loitering. It's great, and it reminds me of a Captain's quote..." he trailed off, about to reach for another cupcake, but he only felt a soft, if a bit crusty, mane.

He looked around him again, nopony else was out and about on this street, so it was only him and three little fillies.

"What's the quote?" Sweetie Belle asked in curiosity, sitting beside the man, wanting to hear him speak more.

"Yeah, tell us!" Scootaloo chimed in, reinforcing his obligation to say something.

"Come on, ya got a nice voice and I want to hear this quote," Applebloom charmed, and he gave in.

"Where are my cupcakes?" he noticed, looking all over the bench for the sugary treats.

"We ate 'em," the yellow filly blushed a bit in embarrassment.

"Okay, first, next time ask me before you eat my food, and second, I'll say the quote now," he informed, clearing his throat.

"Doesn't matter what the press says. Doesn't matter what the politicians or the mobs say. Doesn't matter if the while country decides that something wrong is something right. This nation was founded on one principle above all else: the requirement that we stand up for what we believe, no matter the odds or the consequences. When the mob and the press and the whole words tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth, and tell the whole world, 'No, you move', Captain America," he recited the words, a few manly tears escaping his eyes as he looked up at the sun that was not the one he had known for so many years.

The whole fucking sky was different than the one he had known for all his life, but it still brought him the same comfort that Earth's sky.

"Wow, that was so awesome!" Scootaloo was the first to react, and received a hand ruffling her soft, yet messy mane.

"I like you kid, ya got spirit, ya gonna go far, real far, maybe even farther than anypony's gone before, just you wait," he said to the little pegasus.

"You, Bloom, ya gonna be tough, ya gonna be smart, ya gonna build an empire with your own four hooves," he turned to the earth pony, on a roll with the inspiring words

"You, cracka, what's your name?" he turned to the small unicorn.

"Sweetie Belle, Mister Card," Sweetie answered, not sure why this man had called her a 'cracker'.

"Sweetie Belle, I think ya might have the voice of an angel, so act like an angel, and you'll woo the hearts and tears of the masses with the beautiful sounds you'll sing," he praised, looking to the sky with his own eyes still wet from the manly tears induced by his quote.

"Oh you, little girls, don't bother with me, I'm just a lonely guy with few friends, so I've not much to live for besides the chance of adventure, I'm nobody you should be listening to," he lamented, the only ponies he really and truly knew were the princesses, Shining Armor, and a brief conversation with Twilight and Pinkie had given him enough ground to like them.

"We can be your friends, and we can adventure together too!" Applebloom cheered, and the three fillies prepared for a high-hoof.

"Aye, lassies, that goes straaaight to me 'eart. We'll have lots of fun, we will, starting now," the burnt-brunette thanked, jumping up and leading the cute trio towards future adventure.

"Aaaaaaawwww, look at them, I think Jacky will be just fine," Pinkie d'aw'd, watching the three fillies get carried off, Applebloom and Sweetie Belle in the tall mans arms, and Scootaloo sitting on his shoulders like a piggy-back ride.

"Um, Pinkie, if my calculations are correct, and they usually are, then at the course they're traveling, they'll end up in the Everfree Forest in a few minutes.

"I think they'll be fine Twi, Jacky can take care of Bloom, Belle, and Scoot no problem,"

"I'm not sure... he may be big, but I don't think he could last that long with all of the dangerous creatures living in the Everfree,"

"He fought through tartarus with nothing but a sabre and a riot shield, I think he can handle some timberwolves and rockadiles," Pinkie informed, showing a frightening amount of insight.

Twilight stopped breathing for a moment, then two, then five, then twelve, finally her natural need for air overpowered her shock and she breathed again.

Immediately after she took in her next breath, the lavender unicorn teleported outside and began galloping after the human.

Pinkie shrugged and went on about her bouncing business.

~Some time later~

Jackson was running, running as fast as he could, his lungs began burning from exertion, but he couldn't stop now, it was so close......

...... just so damn close......

The Cutie Mark Crusaders were screaming, being carried by the warrior and wanting, no, needing him to sprint faster.

"I'm sorry, I can't go any faster," he lamented/apologized, trying to keep up the face despite the circumstances.

This was going to be a hard day.