A Chessmaster and his Game

Okay, first things, first: Luna-dammit people what's with all the hate? I swear there's two likes and six dislikes, and out of the only six comments I've gotten, four were my own, one said that the story was okay, and one complained about Jackson's view of America

Flame and burn me as much as you want in the comment section, I don't delete anything, not stories or comments, complain about how much of my apparently shitty story is... well... shitty, and yell at me for being a Luna-damned idiot. SMITE ME OH MIGHTY CRITICS!

Back to the story, now with four thousand percent (at least for this chapter) more music.

Jackson was bravely approaching danger like many before him.

The CMC informed him that the way he was headed led to 'The Everfree forest, a place filled with horrible monsters like timberwolves and cragadiles and hydras and manticores and stuff like that!' ..... those were their exact words.

Of course, he was a HERO, or something, the point was that he was tougher than a normal human and could do a lot of things that normal humans couldn't do, he was like a superhuman or something.

He could back himself up if these monsters decided to test him after he strut his stuff and pounded his chest in a bellowing battle-cry of badass proclamations.

Machete drawn, the little fillies clinging to his shoulders, he was ready to kick some ass.

A huge pack of timberwolves ambushed him in a clearing, or at least they WOULD have, had he not been prepared for an attack on any front.

Swinging his Tac-Mash, as he named his machete, and the Force Edge around, he chopped through the whole pack of arboreal fiends, apparently receiving points for it.

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1UP

Unfortunately for his combo, there were only eleven timberwolves, but the experience of real combat was exhilarating.

Sprinting along the path again, his lungs seemed to stop being weak little bitches, as he took in several breaths smoothly and easily, unfortunately the process starting getting gritty and labored quite fast, adrenalin could only do so much.

A huge beast came out from the side, nearly tackling him, but it had gone too low, and he merely jumped over it's airborne form.

The bat wings on its sides snapped open and knocking him to the ground, sending the trio of cheering ponies flying away from him.

The wind was knocked out of him as he landed on his stomach, feeling a couple of his ribs crack, but not break. He stayed strong for his charges, and flipped over onto his back, sitting up as quick as he could and unloading the Bucking Blasters into the manticore.

*BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG*

Several holes in its side were starting to squirt blood quickly, the warrior got his shield to his front in time to block a clawed punch from the lion-bat-scorpion thing, though his head ended up getting smacked onto the ground.

He backed up, the seat of his pants scraping against the ground as his legs pushed him away from the large beast.

"GAH, fuck! Shit! Okay, um," the warrior thought of something.

He activated his dragon mode and decided to try something he'd been wanting to check on.

"FUS RO DAH!!!" he shouted.

To his surprise, it worked, the manticore was blown away and sent through several trees, each cracking its bones more and more until its head was messily torn off via the snapping of its neck while impacting a very strong tree while completely horizontal.

*TEN PERCENT LEFT* a strange announcer-type voice said, coming from inside Jackson's head.

He then heard shrieks of fear, the girls!

Running towards the source, he found an odd sight.

The CMC were floating in the air, surrounded by green energy, and the creature responsible was ugly as hell.

"Ha ha ha ha ha, I am the evil Lich of this land, fear me, for I am immortal and can raise the dead!" his voice was like a stupid, typical, cliché, comic-book/old-cartoon villain.

He might as well have said 'I am evil and want all the power, all the power ever, and I want to take over the world, fear me because I'm a villain and can do an evil laugh! *evil laughter*' for all his little statement was worth.

The skeletal villain raised his hands and fired a green bolt of energy at Jackson, distracting him with a sense of overwhelming peace as every little ache and pain in his body vanished, vanished like the Lich did just now, the little fillies in tow.

"Great, now I have to find his skinless ass," the hero complained, sheathing his machete and strapping his shield, running off in a full tilted sprint.

~Some time later~

The hero found himself at a decrepit castle in the middle of the forest, laying simply beyond a rickety bridge over a foggy gorge.

A few lowly armored guards did nothing to stop the warrior as he began strumming his guitar as a zombie blacksmith with a hammer for a hand was banging on an anvil.

The gloriousness of his music made the other enemies simply run away, leaving only the Lich and Jackson to fight it out.

"HA HA HA HA HA! I am even more powerful than before, I am now not a mere Lich, I am now the Lich KING!" the skeletal bastard proclaimed as pointed to the crown on his head.

His fire turned neon green with poisonous power, so much poison, or maybe it was the color, that Jackson retched at the sight.

"HA HA, tremble and kneel before the Lich King, I am immortal, my phylactery, which is what my soul is inside, is one thing that you cannot destroy!" the king decreed.

"Why is that, you monster?" Jackson laughed at how ridiculous this was.

"Because my phylactery, is YOU!" the maddened necromancer revealed, letting out a peal of laughter, despite the fact that he shouldn't have even been able to talk due to lacking the necessary organs.

"Fuck that shit, and fuck you nigga!" the hero broke the spell of classic adventuring by shooting himself in the stomach with one of his Colts.

He immediately regretted the decision, "AH SHIT! FUCK! ASS! BITCH! DAMMIT! BASTARD! PISS ON MY DICK IN HELL YOU CUNT THAT HURTS SO DAMN MUCH GOD WHY!?" he screamed as overwhelming pain filled his body, bringing him to his knees as a rainbow colored ball of light formed from some of the blood pouring from his entry and exit wounds.

He picked up the ball, and with expert aim, put it on the end of one of the Colts and fired.

The Lich King lost two things in a millisecond, first his immortality, and second his life, as his soul entered his body and was immediately followed by a large bullet, which broke both sides of his skull.

With the Lich King dying a very un-comic-book and un-temporary death, Jackson stepped over to claim his prize.

*LEVEL UP*

*too cool for a normal sound*

You got: The Heart Container

This is a phylactery, the blood inside represents a second layer of life over your body, the blood replenishes just as your normal blood, while there is still blood in this heart-shaped amulet, you will face no harm.

*too cool for a normal sound*

You got: The Necronomicon

A simple, easy, though tedious how-to step-by-step guide on how to be an awesome necromancer, this special edition also includes the second volume, how to be a lich

(WARNING: merely looking at the words in this book will drive one insane, do not read for any extended period of time, or you will wither away into a blackened husk)

*too cool for a normal sound*

You got: The Elemental Twins enhancement

This power activates the Castle Crasher amulet and lets you control not only fire, ice, poison, and lightning, but also earth and wind, but only in combinations of poison-fire, ice-lightning, and earth-wind

"Oh, that's what it does, cool," Jackson summoned a ball of toxic green flame, juggling it with two more balls of flame, laughing and singing a Big Tent-esque theme.

"Ha ha, I feel like a clown juggling this," he laughed, before dismissing the fire and falling to the ground as his wounds caught up with him, several hammer strikes to the chest did not do good things to one's ribs.

The orb that served as the CMC's prison dissipated, dropping the no-worse-for-wear fillies to the ground.

"Oh no!" Applebloom cried out when she saw the state of their hero.

"Mister Jackson's fallen," Sweetie Belle continued.

"And I don't think he can get up," Scootaloo finished, poking the collapsed human's side.

"No, no I'm fine, really I a-HRRRRGUGUGUG-SHIT, okay, I've fallen and I can't get up," Jackson gave up, his collective wounding too great to deal with, "If you could just, like, take me to the hospital, that would be great," he groaned, trying to push himself up again.

It was pathetic, he realized, as everything that he needed to do began with what was the equivalent of one push-up.

"Wouldn't ya get dirt in yer' wounds?" the yellow filly asked concernedly.

"Right, Scoots, carry my head, keep it above the rest of me, Bloom and Belle, lift me on your backs, I may be big, but I only weigh about a hundred and five pounds, which is thirty five pounds for each of you,"

"We all average a weight of twenty five pounds ourselves," Sweetie Belle calculated.

"I weigh fifteen, being a pegasus, and I can't fly either, so I can't lift your head." Scootaloo looked greatly saddened by her own statement.

"I weigh thirty five, being an earth pony," Applebloom corrected, trying to keep Jackson's head elevated anyways.

"Well shit, okay, two things, girls, don't copy my foul language, you're all too young and cute to be saying bad words like I do, and get help, please," the jade-eyed man pleaded as said eyes got a bit glassy.

"I'm the quickest," Scootaloo pointed out.

The three showed a surprising bout of impeccable teamwork, Applebloom hashed together a scooter with some pipes, a board of wood from a door, and some wheels of stone, in less than a minute, the makeshift vehicle was complete.

Scootaloo saluted and began riding off, for a filly who couldn't fly, she could make a scooter go mind-bogglingly fast in the same manner as the supposedly impossible task.

A few seconds later, she found Twilight Sparkle worriedly trotting towards the castle while muttering something.

"The trail of dead grass leads here, I hope they're okay," she mumbled, she had been following a trail of magically killed grass for the past several minutes.

"MISS TWILIGHT! HELP!" the orange filly called out, surprised at how easy her job.

Twilight's attention snapped to the filly, who was frantically waving her over.

Teleporting to the other side of the bridge, she quickly followed the little pegasus into the castle.

An explanation of the events that had transpired over the past ten minutes.

The lavender mare took in this information, then scanned all four of the affected for anything wrong.

The three fillies went glassy-eyed as the mage found out they had been poisoned quite heavily.

Reacting quickly, she teleported all five of them to Ponyville Hospital.

~One teleportation later~

Nurse Redheart was shocked to see the local librarian appear in the middle of the hospital with three fillies and a large monkey-looking-thing. Her shock disappeared as she realized that teleporting to the hospital had a purpose.

"What's the situation?" she asked, profession and duty kicking in.

"These three got poisoned, and he's an unrecorded species and is hanging on by a few threads to keep alive," the stripe-maned unicorn informed immediately.

Redheart jumped into action and began the process of transporting the four afflicted to the appropriate areas.

Twilight sighed, hoping for the best, but preparing for the worst.

She decided to go tell her friends the bad news.

~A day later~

Scootaloo pushed open the door to Jackson's room, she had been the first out of recovery, and wanted to check up on her and her friend's savior.

Even though the medical procedure had started with a simple case of poison control, things got complicated when two facts came up: it was magic-enhanced poison, and it had been permeating their bodies for an extended time.

The pegasus was the first done because her body mass and metabolism allowed her to heal from the poisoning faster.

Quietly tip-hoofing into the room, the little pegasus climbed on top of the human, looking at him closer.

Several stitches were sewn all over her mostly bare body, the only part covered was the area between his waist and his knees, he looked peaceful at the moment, mainly from the IV of morphine.

However, his pulse was measured as faint and choppy, almost nothing.

Scootaloo backed away and off of the hospital bed as a faint green light surrounded the human.

The pulse monitor went flat at rang out it's whining *beeeeeeeeeeep*

*dun-nah-nah  nah-nah nah-NAY* a strange beeping sound emanated from the tall man's body as a skull appeared, wreathed in green light, then it changed into a strange mushroom-like shape.

The monitor began giving off a normal, healthy beeping as all of the human's wounds seemed to disappear, his Heart Container completely filled again.

"Ugh, I feel like I'm breathing in new life again, it feels great, oh hey Scoot," Jackson groaned out, feeling his body free of his aches and pains again, this time for real.

Scootaloo jumped onto the bed and sat between the man's shins, "Hey Jack, I came in here to check up on you, I got really worried because the pulse monitor thingy went flat for a few seconds, but then you gave off this light-show and there was a skull, and a mushroom, and now you're alive!" Scootaloo hugged him around his thin torso.

"Yeah, yeah I am, I like being alive, I gotta admit, and I like having a friend like you, so what's up with the bandages?" he noticed the dot bandages on her forelegs.

"Oh, I think me and my friends got poisoned or something, so they had to cure it, and to do that, we all got a few shots, though half of mine are vaccinations that I don't think I got before. Anyways, I wanted to see how you were doing, I like you, because you're the first one to give me hope in a long time," the little filly began softly crying.

The jade-eyed man was at a loss for words, had his brief interactions been so influential that it drove this little girl to cry over the thought of not having him anymore?

Wow, he was impressed with his own charisma.

It was a good thing that he loved kids, "Shhh shh shhh-sshhhhh, it's okay, it's okay, I'm here, and like I said, when we get out of here, you'll go really far, kiddo, and I'll help you get there too," he comforted, though he only succeeded in making the tears flow faster.

"T-t-th-th-th-thank you, *sniff* you're the best pony I've... well, you're not a pony, you're the best human I've ever met, granted I've only met one, you, I'm sure that if there was another human, he would be the best human, that's you, Jack, I like the way you care about me," she began listing his virtues.

"D'aaaaawwwwwwww, you're making me blush, I'm just a friendly guy who loves children and tends to be a bit Jackson-ian about it," he immediately realized that that was the only stupid way he could have worded that his love for kids was like that of Michael Jackson.

In McCard's eyes, Michael Jackson had loved kids because he was truly a kid at heart, so with his kid heart, he connected with young ones more easily than those who'd been too busy acting grown up.

"I mean, well, that sounded stupid, I was trying to refer to a celebrity whose last name was Jackson, my point was supposed to be that I firmly believe that," he cleared his throat for quoting time, "What's the point of being grown up if you can't act childish sometimes?" he asked rhetorically.

"Oh, okay, that's actually really cool, y'know, you're really cool," the little pegasus praised, breaking the hug and looking up at his jade eyes with her own violet ones.

"Oh I'm nobody special," he half-heartedly denied, chuckling, eliciting a giggle from Scootaloo.

"But you are, you're awesome, and, and , and really cool. Like... at least thirty percent cooler than most ponies. You went through the Everfree Forest and beat up all those Everfree monsters like they were practically nothing, and then that Lick guy, you did a big ol' heroic sacrifice thing and beat him like he was nothing, and you got some new thingies to add to your doohickey collection, and you saved me and my friends. I really appreciate everything you've done for me in the past two days," she ranted, making cool hoof-gestures and everything to emphasize her words.

"Past two days? Was I out all night?" the warrior worried, how long HAD he been out.

"Yeah, it's noon now, so it's like, two days, I mean it's really only one day, but one day spanned over two separate days, so two days, I guess. Anyways, yeah, I feel like we're really good friends already," the orange pegasus stumbled over her words

"Y'know, you're the like little sister than I have, but want more of. You're cute, you got a strong spirit and plenty of spunk, and together, I think this will be the start of a beautiful friendship," Jackson chuckled at his own words, did he seriously just say that line?

"Really? You'd be like my big brother that I never had but wanted one a whole lot, will you.... will you be my big brother?" Scootaloo braced for impact, not sure if she was getting attached too fast.

"Will I be your big brother? Tell me, do tha niggas got da Kool-Aid?" the burnt-brunette asked, not caring about racial slurs in a world that technically did not have that race in it.

"Ummm....." the little pony looked at him with her head cocked to the side.

"Of COURSE they do, and of COURSE I'll be your brother, where do I sign up?" he was sincere, but he asked that last part sarcastically.

"Right here, actually," the violet-maned filly raised up a clipboard with a document and a pen on it.

Jackson read it quickly, not caring about the specifics, and signed where he needed to before returning the clipboard.

Scootaloo nervously looked at the signature, but to her surprise, it was actually the name of the one she had asked, "I... I... thank you, thank you so much," she dropped the clipboard and hugged him again.

"You're welcome, sis, anything for you, almost anything at least, the answer still has a chance, albeit a very small one, to be a 'no', but a lot of the time, it's 'yes', because when duty calls, I answer, and the answer is 'victory', but only in that case, I'll stop talking and just hug you back now," he informed, shutting his mouth and hugging her back.

He gently stroked her mane and sort of half-rubbed-half-scratched at the base of her wings, even playing with her little ears.

Jackson was a man of his word, and his word was that the two were family now, and all the things that come with being family.

Yes, they were family now, and family stuck together, stood together, and loved each other.

Despite the oddities of his existence, not only being in Equestria, but being blessed with video game things, he stayed rather sane-seeming.

Only sane-seeming though, as he was good at hiding it.

He hid the monster deep within his soul.

One day, it would come out, and when that day comes, the entity known as 'shit' would get real, and in the process of becoming real it would be subject to gravity, so 'shit' would go down, fate and space conspired against it though, as it became real inside a vertical air-conditioner shaft, and so, 'shit' would hit the fan.