My Little Pony: Storm Raiders

The Ponyville victory was an amazing one for the earth ponies; they may not have had wings or horns, but the guns provided to them by their human friends were certainly far more powerful than the crossbows used by the minions.

“That is a job well done,” said Big McIntosh; “but now is certainly not the time to rest on our laurels. We still have to take back Appleloosa after this. Prepare yourselves. I’ll text Bond.”

He took out his phone and sent a text to Bond.

We’ve rooted the entire Ponyville of its minion citizens, and are now busy trying to put everything back into proper order. Next orders awaited. Big Mac

Bond, in the meantime, was in the Rainbow Factory in Cloudsdale together with Derpy, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Spitfire, Thunderlane, and Soarin. Spitfire was very very pissed about what Rainbow Dash had done in the factory.

“So. Do you know that this is THE room that demands MAXIMUM cleanliness, Rainbow Dash?” demanded Spitfire. “And so now how are you going to compensate for pooing on the floor of THIS room, of all the rooms in here?"

“I’ll just mop it up at the most,” said Rainbow Dash.

“You mop up also no point; the room is already filled with the stench of your poo!” cried Thunderlane.

“I have an idea,” said Bond, “if you guys care to listen to me and stop your nonsense.”

The six pegasi turned around and looked at Bond. They knew by the tone of his voice that he meant business.

“Take Rainbow Dash’s poo up and pour it into the rainbow buckets,” said Bond.

“WHAT? You’re not serious are you Mr Bond??” cried Spitfire.

“You’ve gone too far this time!” roared Thunderlane.

“Listen to me first,” said Bond, “or I swear I will take the same poo by my hand and shove it up your arses.”

“You may speak,” said Spitfire, “but don’t forget, I am the mayor in these parts, and I have the power to have you hounded out of here anytime if I see such a need. Now shoot.”

“The forces of evil are still in Canterlot, according to Cartman; they’re going to be making their way past here if they want to get Ponyville,” said Bond; “because Cloudsdale lies directly above the road from Canterlot to Ponyville. By this time they should already be aware that Ponyville has been recaptured by Big Mac and his team of Earth Ponies, who will next be making their way to Appleloosa; so the minute you see Guzman and his men from here, that’s when you pour it down. Furthermore, such fertiliser as this manure is certainly going to be a waste if you throw it away; so why not put it to good use, so when you pour it down the rainbow, it will also fertilise the Ponyville soil as it goes?”

The ponies looked stunned. They knew that Bond certainly had a point.

“Mr Bond,” said Spitfire, “for once I see some good in you. Sometimes there is really no such thing as a free lunch; you do have to sacrifice one thing if you want to gain another thing. Your this idea to me sounds like a brilliant idea. All you ponies, grab Rainbow Dash’s manure and dump it into all the buckets. Don’t pour it down until I say you can. But for now, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Derpy, and Bond, the four of you may go.”

Bond jumped onto Derpy’s back. Derpy neighed out loud, and with Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy behind her, she flew out of the factory.

“What now?” asked Rainbow Dash.

“I’ve just texted Big McIntosh and told him and his team to move on to Appleloosa and recapture it,” said Bond. “Mayor Spitfire will know how to handle Benz Guzman and his men when they move down to Ponyville. In the meantime, I’ve also texted Shining Armour and told him to lead the other unicorns from the Frozen North down to Manehattan, which they will need to defend at all costs. So what we’ve got here is this — the Earth Ponies in Ponyville and Appleloosa, the Unicorns in Manehattan, and you Pegasi in Cloudsdale; we shall defend this nation at all costs!”

Meanwhile, Guzman and his men were certainly well aware about the fact that Ponyville had been recaptured by the defense teams, and Appleloosa was next. At the time the news arrived, Guzman and five of his generals were halfway down the Everfree Forest.

“Got this text from Senor Brink,” said Guzman; “says that Ponyville has been recaptured, the entire minion population has been eradicated successfully by an army of only six caballos, and we need to turn back and take the city again.”

“Caramba!” cried Diaz. “They were way too clever for us! Tell you what — I’ll go and give a call to General Staffansson, General Prada, and General Cruz!”

He went to make a phonecall to the three generals, who arrived in just a matter of five minutes via means of the magic powers that Morgana had bestowed upon them, together with an army full of minions.

“Staffansson, Cruz, go and recapture Ponyville and Appleloosa!” ordered Diaz. “We’re still trying to figure out how to get around this forest!”

“Si senor!” said Generals Staffansson and Cruz; and they set off for Ponyville with their army of minions.

“Prada, come with me,” said Guzman; “we need to bring you to see Senor Brink first, as this is your first time commanding a legion of minions. Come, I’ll take you there. General Diaz, wait here for us.”

“Si,” said Diaz.

In Canterlot Castle library, Morgana had successfully found a book which contained an article on the supposed squidlike creatures that General  Ruiz had seen. They did exist after all; the article said it this way:

The Martians, sometimes called "the Yip-Yips", are interplanetary visitors, presumed to be from the planet Mars, who are terrified by things like clocks, telephones and computers. These creatures, with squid-like tentacles, large eyes, and antennae, materialize into a room and converse with each other in their native tongue: "Yip-yip-yip-yip... Uh-huh. Uh-huh," done in monotone voices. They often come across common objects and, curious as to their names and functions, the Martians will consult a book, which they call “earth book”, presumably containing information about things on Earth.

“Ho, ho, ho! So THAT’s what General Spettro and General Ruiz saw!” laughed Morgana. “The wimps, those two of them! I’ll never once believe that we actually had such wimps among our people! They didn’t even know that they already possessed the very thing that would scare those aliens away — their mobile phone ringtones! Ah! Ah! Ah!"

She went and told Sean Brink about it. Brink was not amused. “Morgana, text your boyfriend and tell him and his friends to whip out their mobile phones the minute they see the aliens!” he ordered. Morgana obeyed promptly.

Just then, General Prada came over with Benz Guzman to report to Sean Brink. “So, any news?” demanded Brink. “Where are Cruz and Staffansson?"

“General Ramon Prada reporting for duty, senor,” said Prada. “General Cruz and General Staffansson are on the way down to Ponyville to take the city. They say they will be able to capture within just a matter of hours.”

“Very good,” said Brink; “the two of you, come with me first. Morgana has some briefings for you."

And it was during this time that Alberto had been living in the cave under Canterlot Castle, with Coatsworth the clock and Lewis the candlelabra. They had by this time already found the “bottomless pit” that Morgana had spoken of, an enormous hole in an even bigger and echoey hall right smack in the centre of the entire cave; however all three were careful not to go near it. They had been moving through the entire cave for the past few days, looking for an exit route.

“Rescue still hasn’t come,” lamented Alberto; “and it’s been almost a week now. I am getting concerned for my pony friends.”

“We’ll just keep going on,” Coatsworth reassured him; “anyways that’s exactly what we’ve been doing all the while. We’ll be nearing an escape very soon, I hope.”

It was Lewis who suddenly claimed to have found the exit route.

“There’s something kinda hollow above here,” he said. “I lit one of my sticks and just tapped up there.” He tapped on it again. BOM! BOM! BOM! “Voila, you see, that’s clear-cut hollow.”

“Let’s see if it will move,” said Alberto. “The two of you can help me to push the stone.”

“Ready!” called Lewis, as Alberto and Coatsworth put their hands and head respectively against the apparently hollow cave wall above. “1! 2! 3! HEAVE!”

The stone bulged a little.

“Splendid!” cried Lewis. “Push it, push it, some more!

Stone, we want to make you sweat,

Sweat till you can’t sweat no more;

We’re gonna make you cry out,

We, we’re gonna push it, push it some more!

So the three of them sang as they heaved the stone continually. It kept bulging…. then it moved a significant bit….. and broke right through the FLOOR of the great hall in Canterlot Castle — and were caught red-handed by General Prada, General Staffansson, General Cruz, Morgana, and Sean Brink!!!

“What the…..??” gasped Alberto, as he gaped into the faces of the enemies he knew only FAR too well….