Author's Note

Here is the second half of the chapter I published today. Hence it is a small chapter too.

Enjoy and please comment.

Fate

After the doctor had stormed out, I was left alone once again. Well, if one ignored the guards standing at the door, but they could have been statues instead and nopony would have noticed. ‘Twas as it was supposed to be, but I still couldn’t shake the picture of the one single tear from my mind.
A few moments later their sight unnerved me and so I opted to look out of the window instead. The sky was almost void of clouds and its hue of blue was not ugly, but again my thoughts went on, about how it paled in comparison to the color of that pony’s aura in my dream. These thoughts led me to others about colors and suddenly two orbs of the most mysterious shade of violet popped up before my mind’s eye.

Shocked I blinked several times as events, likely to unfold, forced themselves upon me. Probably they arrested Twilight in this very moment, dragging her out of her home and onto the streets. Reporters from both, close and far away, would flash their cameras, further deepening the troubles I had put her through. Maybe a mob of citizens would have built by then and asking for what gave them the right to just drag her princess through the streets.
I almost could hear the gasps of the crowd, when they heard about what happened. There was a chance that there would be an uproar from the crowd and even though the guards would keep them at bay, a few would throw things or stones at the lavender alicorn.

Shunning her for a crime she did not even remember committing.

The feeling of tears running down my cheeks brought me out of my imagination and I instantly realized why. Here I lay. Raped. Possibly impregnated. And I cried because I ruined the life of the very mare that took everything from me, even my dream of living peacefully with a stallion by my side. I cried for her, not for me. Because I broke the promise I made myself, that I would never again destroy the life of another pony, regardless what they did to me. But I couldn’t help it anymore.

I should have said that I didn’t remember anything about the night. Maybe then the doctor would have just covered everything up and she could have lived on, oblivious that she sired a foal through rape.

Now though, there was bound to be a huge scandal. Not a single newspaper would go without a photo of her ‘highness’, the princess who raped an innocent mare and even sired a foal through it.
Irritated I shook my head a few times. When did it become a fact that I would even be pregnant? Confused as to why it seemed so dead set to me just a mere seconds ago, I frowned at my hooves.

My first idea was to call for a doctor to run a pregnancy test, but I discarded it almost as quick as it came to me. It would be another weak at minimum until this test would make sense. Because my body would start to prepare for the foal to grow inside of me and just then it was possible to even tell.
Fear rushed through my system again when the possibility hit me again. It had done that several times already and I really should have realized by this point, that the possibility was very real, but my practiced denial overshadowed the fact time and time again. And it never lost one bit of its force.

My stare was fixed at the sheets again, just over the place where my belly was and again I felt terrified beyond belief. But there was something else and I tried to fight it back, at first.
A hoof laid itself on it and despite me crying still, a small smile tugged at the corners of my lips. Fear ebbed away, never quite leaving, but dulled due to the other feeling. Maybe it was this feeling that made me so convinced that I was pregnant before? I was at a loss of words to describe exactly what it was I was feeling, but it came very close to pleasant anticipation.

Giving birth was a part of my dreams, after all.

Maybe, just maybe, this could work out in the end. Maybe I was able to learn how to love Twilight and maybe, though it was a very, very small maybe, the princess could figure out what it was, that drew mares to me and she could heal it?
That was if they didn’t sentence her to a life imprisonment for rape.
Could I convince them that it was consensual? It would safe her and would spare me a life as a branded mare. But most importantly, it would prevent my foal from being an outcast, even if it meant that I had to live with my rapist.

Repeating that night over and over again.

A strange calm washed over me then and I didn't need to wonder as to why, because I knew it was the calm that came with accepting ones fate. A chuckle void of joy escaped my lips.

Fate. Destiny.

What grave words in pony culture. My gaze shifted slightly to where my flank would have been, but I didn’t look at the sheets. I could almost see the two open wings that made up my Cutie Mark. The most cliché Cutie Mark a Pegasus like myself could get, if they would have been the wings of my kind or even any known animal.
No, the wings on my flanks were so full of feathers that they had to be bigger as Celestia’s own, consisting of no color, at all. A passerby would have described the color as ‘pure white’ but I knew better. The wings in my Cutie Mark lacked all colors, they simply had none.

The irony of it all got the better of me and I began to laugh, lacking any happiness or mirth in the action, while I buried my face in my hooves and bent over to let my mane fall around it to hide myself away from the cruelty.
Wings, the Cutie Mark to represent freedom more than any other and here I just accepted my fate of being a victim to recurring rape of unknown quantity during my future.

I didn’t care, that there were technically ponies watching me, I didn’t care that, at any moment, the door could open to reveal even more ponies. I just cried.
Everything came crushing down right then and there. Every single advance in my past, some more prominent then others. Every single time I was on the verge of just giving up, but finding the strength to go on, to live on. My years of denial caught up to me and threatened to strangle me in the process. A few gasps of breath were everything I could manage between my sobs and silent screaming. I rocked myself to and fro in an unsuccessful attempt to calm me.

I didn’t care to look up when I heard the doors open and not even when this was followed by quite the commotion. My head became more and more dizzy, the few gasps obviously not providing enough oxygen. Losing consciousness sounded not half as bad to me, but that changed with one sharp and shocked intake of air, as I felt a wing wrapping around me.
The flinch, it brought out of me, distanced my eyes enough from my hooves, so that they could open and open even wider, until I was staring at the matted fur on my forelegs and everything went to dead silent.

A hoof stroked my mane and I was breathing now, even if it was just shallow. The wing around my back pulling me in slightly, not with enough force to make me lean in but I did so nonetheless, my hooves sinking to the sheets in the process. I must have looked like a truly broken mare then and maybe I was. Because the wing tightened the tiniest amount around me, while a not unexpected voice drifted to my ear in what was merely a whisper.

“I’m so indescribable sorry for what I’ve done to you.” There was genuine regret in her voice, but no single sign of a tremble or uncertainty as she stated. “We will make it through, together. I will be there for you and our foal and I promise that I won’t let something like this happen ever again.”

I didn’t shy away and felt my eyes close once again, as my body relaxed into her embrace. A tiny voice in the back of my head asked why I wasn’t freaking out, but it mattered none.
The pony stroking and holding me just confirmed what I had feared and instead of screaming, crying, or even beating her, I just let everything go.
Again my uninjured hoof laid itself upon my belly, where I now knew for certain, a new life would grow, only to be covered by a lavender one, gently stroking.

“I believe you, Twilight…”