Author's Note

Don't read this if you are afraid of getting pumped.

For maximum hype: Read one chapter at a time. Do something mundane in your life. Feel hyped about doing something LIKE AN AMERICAN DREAMER. Rewind. Play.

Level 0: Gotta find Marian!

Man, the streets are flowing with fresh New Coke which is making everybody hurl, the ladies of the night are armed with their snappiest whips, and that jerk in the afro has been breakdancing for twelve straight hours! That’s right, baby, everybody’s kicking it, and this day can’t get any better. Let me tell you this, sucka: Ain’t nobody gonna be ruining this by stealing those Lee boys’ girl! This time they went outside, and go figure that they didn’t get a fist in the belly the moment they did. But when they returned they found themselves in total shock.

“Whoa, Marian’s gone!”

This is so not bodacious.

“Aw man, well I guess we better go get her back.” Said Jimmy, his face and hair showing his epic depression.

Billy was not cool with that. “Nuts to that! We just need to get a new girl, I think they got a six pack at the bar on the left!”

“No go bro, only Marian knows how the clicker works!”

“Aw snap, what are we waiting for!” And they both burst into the street through the garage door, because the regular door was not large enough to fit both them and their awesomeness through it!

Battle ready and fists held high, they went to the only natural direction: The right. The streets were clear because of that last beatdown they laid on everyone, so nobody would ever step up to the challenge, meaning that everything was as smooth as a glass of Pepsi. But then, they came across an open door that led into an empty void that lacked the typical giant glowing arrow pointing into it saying that it was a shop. So the only possible conclusion is this must’ve been a secret path. So with that, they jumped up in the air and clapped hands before rushing straight in through the door, like Americans.

They fell into the portal and soon came out the other end, because a loading screen knew it’d get it’s butt whooped if it dared show up here! But what’s worse is that they were thrown into an unfamiliar and totally not hip world of gorgeous colors, a visible sun, and not a single lamp post containing a whole cooked chicken was around to be found. But were they wigging out? Hell no! Because they arrived on a road, and there’s only two directions on a road: Left or right. They went right, passing a sign that stated they were in Ponyville.

Shizznets gonna be poppin’ off like crazy!