Double Dragon: Rainbow Initiative

Our two heroes soon found themselves totally surrounded by the denizens of this quaint community, hiding themselves in their houses and drinking tea, the fiends. But were they scared? Were they just going to totally bail and give up on their girl? Hell no! They strutted it right into the center of town before they were approached by an overly enthusiastic unicorn with light green hair and a similarly colored mane with white highlights. And of course it spoke, because all unicorns speak.

“Oh my gosh, you’re humans! Can I have your autograph?”

Billy and Jimmy looked at each other and back to the unicorn. And the only thing that came out of their mouths was “A talking narwhal with hooves! Radical!”

The unicorn rolled her eyes playfully and dismissed the comment with a wave of her hoof. “I’m not a narwhal, silly. My name is Lyra Heartstrings, and I’m just a plain unicorn. But what’s more radical is that you’re humans! That’s so cool!”

“You know what’s also cool? Your ink!” Remarked Billy Lee.

“Yeah, where’d you snag the tramp stamp?” Continued Jimmy.

“Oh, that’s just my cutie mark. It’s nothing special. But you guys have hands! That is so amazing! Can I look at them?” And without a response she totally invaded our heroes’ personal space. They were not having it. Billy swung behind Lyra and put her in a full nelson and Jimmy followed this with a flurry of punches to her unprotected belly. After the seventeenth hit, they let her go writhing on the ground in pain. For some strange reason she didn’t disappear.

“Man, that nerdicorn did not stand a chance.”

“Well it is level one.”

“Hey look, that one has wings!” Billy pointed at some grey haired pony with wings adorned with a blonde mane which was carrying a bag bustling with papers. They double walked fast right up to her, causing two distinct shadows to fall over her.

The mutant horse looked at the both of them with a pair of wonky eyes that pointed in two directions. “Hi, I’m Derpy! I’ll have your mail in just a sec.” She said, searching through her satchel.

“Hey, maybe she’s not an enemy after all.” Said Jimmy.

She soon held out a couple of letters for them in her mouth. Jimmy was about to reach for them when Billy caught his hand. “Wait a sec, this dorkusus doesn’t even know our address!”

“Aw snap!” And Jimmy let fly a fist of unrelenting force that cracked at the side of Derpy’s jaw, flooring her instantly. He then picked her up. Have you ever tried to lift a horse? Not that easy, fool! And he threw her right at Billy who clutched her around the belly in a hold and followed through with a suplex right into a garbage can!

Now you might think that after all this, ain’t nobody gonna be messing with those Lee boys! They be so bad! Well you’d be totally wrong, loser. They didn’t come across the boss just yet! But then, red as the devil, blonde as blondie, and big a really big thing stood Big Macintosh right in the middle of the road. The large stallion detached himself from a cart carrying apples and got up right in our heroes’ faces and he was ready and rarin’ to go.

Billy was not daunted. “Hey, you must be the big cheese!”

“That’d explain the smell!” Neither was Jimmy apparently.

Big Mac thought these rad-bad dudes were totally not righteous, so he swiftly spun around and sent our heroes flying back with a kick from both hooves. It just got real. They got back up, readied their dukes, and charged right at Big Mac, Jimmy taking the lead with his fist readied to deliver the momentum into a force that could shatter all but the mightiest of trash cans. Big Mac matched this with one of his front hooves sent flying in a directed kick that used all the brunt of his muscles. They were evenly matched, and a boom sounded throughout the land to let all know something heavy was going down.

Big Mac threw his head back, snout held high in the air, and prepared to headbutt the young upstart but immediately his face was nearly obliterated by Billy who delivered a crushing dive kick. Big Mac was stunned giving Jimmy the chance to cancel his punch and deliver a spin kick which sent Mac flying. He lifted his head, which by all means should have been destroyed, but it fell back on the ground leaving him defeated. Our heroes celebrated by walking off into the right to the next level.