Equestria Route Zero

Act Three, Scene Three – The Lower Depths

How?

That was the question that ran through my mind during the entire journey to The Lower Depths. Somehow, Flitter had managed to fix the truck & here we now stood, outside a small dingy, wooden tavern, with the truck quietly humming away in the parking lot. She had bought it back to life & now we were in her debt. So, naturally, we followed them to watch their gig.

The Lower Depths, as I have already said, was a small tavern. Being out here though, you could guess why – there was nothing but miles & miles of open road on either side, & there were no other distinguishable landmarks. Just lots of sand. Hardly a great place to attract customers. A large blue neon sign hung from the front porch. “Hard Times served”. It swung slightly, almost gently in the breeze. Behind the building itself, one could see the last remnants of the storm passing over the mountains, taking the high winds with it. Shining Armor & Winona both came up to my side, whilst Misty went off with our new acquaintances into the tavern.

“Doesn't feel right. Feels dead here. Well, that's just a feeling. Right?” I turned to Shining Armor for something encouraging but both he & Winona just looked at me. He shrugged, she yawned. Together, we followed our hosts into the tavern.

Inside, it held a more rustic aesthetic than a decaying one. Continuing with wooden panels on the inside on the walls & the floor, wooden tables & chairs cluttered the place. It's no wonder the outside looked like a desert.

“Kind of late – are you sure they're open?” asked Shining Armor.

“Sure, they're open. This is one of those places.” Flitter replied. She pointed out the barman at the back of the room, a man who until we entered was the only person even in The Lower Depths. He looked up & nodded slightly, if only in a mood of sorts.

“'We are not saints, but we've kept our appointment. How many people can boast as much?'” Flitter stood in an odd pose, holding her arm out to the barman.

“Ooo, that's lovely. Who said it?” asked Cloudchaser.

Flitter's stance slackened, & she gave a small sigh. A very audible sigh.

“A poet.”

The silence was deadly. In a few short minutes, everyone had gone off to do their own thing. Shining Armor had gone off to see the barman, now revealed to us by Flitter to be Blueblood, both she & Cloudchaser were at a corner stage setting up their tech & Misty was busy inspecting a jukebox in another corner of the room. I decided to make my way over to both Flitter & Cloudchaser, to learn a bit more about them, to prepare myself for whatever they were to present to us.

“Ma'am, I hate to say it, but the cupboard is bare.” said Cloudchaser.

“Have some vision, cricket.” Flitter began to count the numbers in the room. “We've got – one, two... four patrons.”

“Blueblood doesn't count.”

Flittter waved away the dismissal with her hand. “Well, we've done more with less.”

“What kind of music do you play?” I asked. Flitter jumped down from the stage, dropping her task & letting Cloudchaser pick it up in the middle of her own.

“It's like Cyrano Colt meets like Towner, but with a woman lead, & the keyboards are kind of ambient whisper-wave.”

“Little bit more reverb.” piped in Cloudchaser.

“There's some Holly Crown in there, too. Like the early stuff before she joined the Sheet Swingers.”

“Better drum programming, though!” Again, Cloudchaser managed to pipe in, despite  the tangle of wires that had managed to get stuck on her arms.

“I don't know who these people are.” I admitted. I never was one for modern music, let alone anything without an old country guitar. Flitter gave another dismissal wave.

“Well, you'll hear it in a minute.”

I nodded in reply. In impressive grace, Flitter jumped back up onto the stage & immediately went to work in untangling Cloudchaser who by now had started to look more like a large wire herself with how many she had managed to wrap around her. I left the pair to their set up & made my way over to Shining Armor at the bar.

“All I'm pouring tonight is Hard Times Whiskey.” said Blueblood, answering a question that Shining had asked.

“Got any coffee going?” I asked. Blueblood turned to me & shook his head.

“No coffee. Hard Times Whiskey.” He pulled away from his leaning position & began shouting away towards the fire exit. “Say, shut the G.D. door, would you? I can't afford to run the A.C. all night!”

“Sorry, Blueblood.” Both Cloudchaser & Flitter had decided to join us as well.

“Oh, it's you two. Where have you been? Never mind. Listen, I can't keep this place open through the small hours of the night just waiting for musicians!” The yelling had been re-directed from the fire exit & onto our hosts.

“Gets lonely, doesn't it?” Flitter asked.

“It... yeah, kinda...”

“How about some music?” She asked.

“There's nobody here to listen to it!” Blueblood waved his arms about aimlessly. “I can't pay for -”

“We bought some people, Blueblood!” Cloudchaser pointed us out. We were the only people that had arrived this late at night.

“Yeah, but also I -”

“Don't you want to hear some music, Blueblood?”

“That does sound nice, after the day I've had...” He nodded his head in agreement. “But I -”

Before he could finish his sentence, both Flitter & Cloudchaser had left for the stage, continuing in their preparations. I shook my head in disbelief at the pair. Noticing Misty was still at the Jukebox, I made my way over to her.

“What do you think?” Her enthusiasm for the machine was interesting, I don't think she had ever seen one before.

“I don't know how to play this game.” She confirmed my suspicions. She really hadn't seen one before. But she continued on nevertheless, flicking through the selection scene, like it was still a game to her.

“How's it going out there? How're y'all feeling tonight?” Flitter had asked enthusiastically. All of us, excluding Blueblood up at the bar, had now gathered around the stage. Being a crowd of three people & one dog, I should think this has been the smallest gig I have ever attended, or will ever attend.

“Hey B! Can we get a bit more reverb in the monitors?” Cloudchaser stood in front of his microphone, tapping it. Blueblood ducked under his bar before sticking his head back up a few seconds later.

“How's that?” he asked. Cloudchaser proceeded to test it out vocally.

“Test. Test. One. One. Three. Fifty. Lamentation. La – men – ta – tion. Sounds good.”

Flitter repeated her questioning & then pointed towards me when asking: “Anybody had a real bad night? What about you, old man?”

I cleared my throat. “Yeah, real bad.”

“We'll try not to make it too much worse. This is a song I heard in a tavern many years ago at an open mic night. Me & Cloudchaser were out just riding around, you know – you like to drive around, old man?”

“That's my job.”

“Of course you do.” She diverted her attention from me & focused back on the entire tavern as a whole. “So we were out riding around & we passed this gaudy old tavern, I mean it was a real dive. Busted up façade -”

“- weeds in the parking lot -” Cloudchaser was now switching with Flitter over the sentence, the description of this tavern.

“- taps all dry -”

“- bats in the bathroom -”

“- & run by this freaky bag of bones, looked like the only thing keeping him awake was the fear of death. So glad to be back here at The Lower Depths.” Flitter finished, winking towards Blueblood.

“Hey, now -” he began before Flitter cut him off.

“So we stopped for an early drink, & there was a lady singing right here on stage. & the song she sang... well, it stuck with us, & now it's a regular part of our repertoire. Never got that lady's name, but she seemed like a sweet gal & she had a voice like scotch whiskey, & we just hope we do her song justice. So here it is: Too Late To Love You.”

I don't know if it was anything to do with the medicine the doctor had prescribed to me, but the stage seemed to transform before my very eyes. In a second or two, the lights in the tavern had gone out. All of them. & seconds later, they came back on, the stage having been transformed in a mere matter of moments. Both Flitter & Cloudchaser had gone through quick wardrobe changes. Instead of their biker gear, a flowing blue gown & white knee length boots were now being worn on Flitter, make-up now encasing her face, eye shadow matching her dress, & Cludchaser wore a full red suit, white highlights running down the seams & along the edges of the fabric, keytar now in hand. The music began to play, & the ceiling appeared to dissapear, revealing the night sky, the clear night sky with its twinkling stars & large full moon. Flitter soon began to sing a sad song that went something like this. I never was good with remembering the lyrics of songs.

I never should have met you on that awful day, I was happy then,

Until you stole my heart, & disappeared again.

It's too late to love you now.

It's too late, I've made my vow.

The hurt you left behind would truly never heal,

a hole where my heart knew there should be something real.

It's too late to love you now.

It's too late, I've made my vow.

In times I thought that somehow love would find a way

but you waited too long, darlin', it's too late.

It's too late to love you now.

It's too late, I've made my vow.

Another life came by & stole my heart away.

I wish I could take it back, but it's too late...

The song ended, & the ceiling returned. The lights dimmed slowly, going to total darkness the moment the song ended. They came back on, & both of them were back in their biker gear, as quickly as they had gotten out of them.

“Well, hope you liked it.” Flitter took to taking a seated position, her legs hanging off the edge of the stage.

“Kind of sad, isn't it?” I asked her.

“Kind of. Listen, we appreciate you folks sticking around for the show. There's nothing more wretched than playing sad songs to an empty room. We've just got to get our fee from Blueblood, & then we'll get you headed to the, uh, Zero...”

Both Shining & I followed the pair to the bar, except Misty who moved back to flicking through the jukebox collection.

“Well, Blueblood, I think that went pretty well.”

“I would say the crowd was into it... reverential!” joined in Cloudchaser.

“Rapt! I guess the usual fee is about right, & we'll let you get back to your... business.”

“Well, that's just the...” Blueblood stopped mid-sentence, & shook his head violently whilst looking down at the floor. “...dammit, I was trying to tell you two, I can't pay! They cleaned me out. I've got nothing left but a G.D. I.O.U. from the distillery.”

In response, Cloudchaser kept in simple: “An I.O.U.”

“Yeah, I traded them some... I traded them for some whiskey, & I guess I had some surplus credit, so I got this note to get some more from them later on.”

“Must have been a hell of a trade.” Cloudchaser managed to laugh out.

“I had to! Got to keep this place open somehow, dammit!”

“Watch your language, Blueblood.” She covered her ears in protest, jokingly I assume.

“Could you pay them with your I.O.U.?” I suggested.

“Well, I...” he stuttered, thinking it over. Flitter piped up with her usual enthusiastic tone.

“Very contemporary, very astute! How about it, B? Let's push some paper around.”

“Well, it's just...” His stuttering continued. “I can collect on it here when they bring up more whiskey. But for you to cash in, you'd have to go down to... you know... Down to the distillery. Down to Hard Times. &, you know, it's... you've got to take the Zero.”

“So that's what we'll do. How do we get there?” Flitter asked confidently.

“Are you sure you folks want to head down there? I've never been myself, but I hear... people hear things. Rumours.”

“It's where we've got to go.” I said.

“Well, I'll tell you then, then. But this is it, right? We're square?”

Flitter nodded her head. “Blueblood, you're alright.”

“If only.” he said. “You got a radio in your car?”

I nodded as proceeded to describe how to get to the Zero from his tavern. According to him, we had to tune our radio to the right setting, one he described as familiar but strange. Once we'd found that, we were to drive straight down the road & when the station cut out, as if we'd lost the signal, we were to turn around & only when it cuts out. No earlier, no later.

We thanked & made our wishes with Blueblood. Back in the truck, both Shining Armor & I fiddled with the dials of the radio until he heard one he didn't recognise. It was the sound of horses running, a race or something. There was no commentator but there was certainly galloping to be heard. Noting the frequency down, we told our friends on the motorcycle & they tuned theirs to the same. Together we left the tavern & went back out on the road.

A few minutes later, & the station did indeed disappear. & following Blueblood's instructions, we turned around. The familiar maw of the cavernous entrance to the Zero was in our view, replacing the road we had just travelled on. Horses trotted past us as we drove slowly into the Zero once again.