Creepy Pie

(Narrated by Mister Breezy)

Thursday, August 29th, 2013

I turned on my laptop, and I had scarcely done so when I was contemplating just turning it back off. If they thought I was just joking before, then after they heard what happened next… It didn’t matter. Things had spiraled out of control, far worse than the night before, and these guys were the only people I had to talk to. Loading up 4chan, I began to type.

“Hey, guys. It's me again. Well... some people asked me to update them tonight about the whole Pinkie thing, but things have gotten so much worse. The sun's going down again, which means spooky stuff might happen again. If you aren't going to believe what I tell you, then just leave now. Some of the stuff I say will sound weird and some of you will say that this is a ruse. All I can say is I'm being 100% honest with you. I'm here because some people wanted an update, and quite frankly, I've been waiting to get this off my chest all day.”

The very first comment was, “Did you giggle at the ghosties?” I shuddered to myself, thinking of what happened the previous night.

“I don't even wanna think about it. I'm an early morning janitor, so I get up, walk to work and do my job before the sun comes up. Something I wanted to say was that throughout this morning, I kept hearing that laugh from Pinkie Pie, only it was louder and wouldn't go away, so I didn't giggle at the ghosties... the ghosties were giggling at me.”

“Giggle louder than them. :D”

“If that’s possible, I’ll do what I can. I have a psychiatrist appointment a week from Monday.”

“That’s a long time to wait, Breezy. I don’t think Pinkie’s going to be playing around much longer.”

“She'd better not. She'd better either leave or kill me now...” I sighed, took a minute to think and continued typing, “which I know she won't...”

“Are you still sleep deprived? Or has Pinkie been letting you sleep? Also, is your Pinkie toy nearby?”

“No. Last night was Hell, but I managed to fall asleep after work (when it was light out). Pinkie's still right next to me. I'm keeping a close eye out on her this time.”

“Well, as long as you've gotten some sleep. How much have the images intensified? Last thread you said you were getting them any time you closed your eyes.”

“They're worse when my eyes are open. It's like she's right there, face to face. I can see her a lot more clearly now, too.”

“So wait… hallucinations?”

“No. I would say that they're hallucinations, but they're real, whether my eyes are open or closed.”

“I'm thinking the fact that Pinkie being inside your rear just PROBABLY might be relevant in this. It’s not something we can ignore if it’s the reason you're in this mess. Personally OP, if I could, I'd head over there as backup.”

“I wish you could. I have no roommates with me today.”

“Is the toy moving by itself? Or are they just images in your head projected to the real world? Can you touch Pinkie?”

“The toy itself disappeared for like an hour yesterday. I can't touch the Pinkie that I see in the dark (thank goodness), but I see her very, very vividly.”

“My face when everyone in this thread will slowly be killed off one by one, and the only evidence they will have is the phrase ‘Life is a party’ carved into the bodies.”

“I really hope no one else has to deal with her because of me...”

“Have you tried apologizing, OP?”

“I have, but that just made things worse... so much worse...”

“Can you please state why the toy is scaring you so much? Is there nothing deformed or off-looking about it, or are you just getting REALLY bad vibes from it? Can you see it if you have your eyes closed?”

“The toy itself isn't scaring me so much as what I'm seeing and experiencing. There's nothing deformed about it. It just disappeared last night for an hour. I can talk in detail about what's going on, but it might take a while to explain.”

“Y͏͚̥͕͈̜͡O̸̤̙̕͠U̧̯͉̤͚͔͘ ̨̦̦͚̯̪̲̀A̙̘͙̖R̥͇͈E̱̥͕͚̘̜͟͡ ̢̮͖͎̕͝D̜̱̜̫̝̬͇͜E̵̝̜̥̠̜̺͠͡A̷̧̗̱̹͇̜͔̘D҉̣̻̘̝͎”

I jumped at the sight. I thought it was really her for a second, either that or her trying to pull a prank on me. “Thanks for that,” I said. “Thanks so much.”

A few minutes passed, and it seemed like there was a lull in the conversation. Nobody was asking anymore questions, so I felt like maybe this was as good a time as any.

“K, so call me a fag if you want, but I really need to talk about this. Here's what Pinkie looks like:

Her whole color is a few shades darker. Her eyes are surrounded by black. The actual eyes themselves are like the color of expired milk, but she doesn't have any color blue around her pupils. They're just black. Her eyes are always opened wide.”

“Pics or it didn’t happen.”

“I don't even know if my camera would work on her or if she'd even appear long enough for me to take a picture. I'll try tonight, though if my phone stops having problems.” Even though I knew nothing would ever come of it. Maybe something strange would happen, and I actually would manage to get it on tape, but knowing Pinkie, everything would go according to plan until the very last second where everything falls apart.

“Have you tried cleaning her? Pics and a timestamp if possible.”

“I cleaned her, yes. What would you like a timestamp of? The toy itself or me cleaning her?”

“The toy would be helpful, but any one would be appreciated.”

“K, if my phone is working, I'll take a shot (It's been acting up on me all day, though).”

While I checked to see if my phone was working, I looked at some of the ideas people had as to what Pinkie looked like, based off of the rendition I told them, each one sending tingles down my spine.

“Like this?”

“No, it's just around her eyes and her pupils that are black. Everything in the middle is some spoiled milk color.”

“So she looks kinda like this?”

“No, more like this only without the straight hair.” I then sent them to the picture of the first creepy picture of the night. “Freaking A. I'm trying to get that image out of my head.”

“I think he means that the black is around her eyes, like mascara. The white part of the eyes are the spoiled milk color, and her usually blue pupils are black.”

It took a little longer for someone else to photoshop an image, so in the meantime, I sent them a picture of the Pinkie Pie toy with a time stamp.

“Y'all seriously believing this? Hauntings? Pentagrams? Banishing spirits?”

“Then why are you here? Like I said in the original post, this is going to sound dumb and set up. If you don't believe me, fine. Just please don't make this process any worse.” At this point, I was more angry than scared. That quickly changed, though, when I saw another rendition of Pinkie.

“So from what I gather, she looks like this?”

“Messier mane, but something like that. Less black and red.”

“Did you shove a toy up your butt today anon?”

At this point, I was shaking again. “Put her in a black room, make her more realistic (as in less cartoony) and that's her.”

“Hey bro, my Pinkie tulpa just said you have a Galaxy S II. Is she right?”

And now I could hardly keep any part of my body still. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and looked at the back. He was right, or rather, what his Pinkie Pie tulpa said was right…

“W...what? Please tell me someone knows how he knows that. Seriously.”

“Seriously OP. Your posts are looking more like a hoax every second.”

“THEN GET OUT!” I was furious. Here I was, scared out of my mind, and some little prick had the balls to call me a liar? Oh, he was lucky I wasn’t there. I’d shove the phone right down his throat, forcing him to look at my Pinkie Pie toy while he did it. He’d see just how much I wasn’t in the mood for this. He’d be more than sorry. I would put him in so much pain that he’d be begging for me to stop, so he would see just how horrified I had been these past three nights. He would finally see what it was like when begging and pleading got you nowhere, when the sadistic had their way… But then I heard Pinkie giggling again.

I snapped out of my dual reality, realizing that Pinkie was laughing at me, and I couldn’t blame her. I had practically gone off the deep end mentally, and she could see just how pathetic I was acting.

“Hey, I'm not saying that you aren't seeing these things. I just think that they are all in your head. No ghosts or haunting here.”

“I don't know where they're coming from. All I know is they're there.”

“OK, OP, how about this?”

“It's like a mix of this and the one right before it, but yeah. That's pretty much her.”

“Wait… They? More than one?”

“I don't know. I honestly don't know. Last night, something happened, but... I'm only going to say it if people promise me they'll be mature about it. This is really freaking me out, and I don't want people laughing in my face about it or telling me that this is all some kind of a freaking ruse.”

I didn’t want to tell them anything. I knew exactly how it’d end up: with talk of how I just copied some creepypasta and nobody believing me… and Pinkie laughing even louder…

“Come on, you gotta say it! We've been serious this far.”

“We're here to listen, OP. Tell us all about last night.”

After a few moments to think it over, I bit the bullet and began typing. Here we go…

“K, well... last night, I finally managed to get to bed. I was just having a dream of the CMC when all of a sudden, Sweetie Belle started levitating in the air. Her whole body was limp and gradually rotated until she was facing me. Her jaw was dropped and her eyes were completely white with black surrounding the edges. When she looked at me, she said, ‘I am God.’ Then I felt hands grabbing me. Real. Human. Hands. Wrapping around my neck. When I woke up, the hands were still there. I freaked out, flailing my whole body to get them off me. They were only there for a few moments, but they weren't a dream. I promise you, I PROMISE that this isn't a joke.”

“Then, hyper realistic blood poured from the sky and Sonic leaped from my screen and killed me.”

“That's a reference to a crappy creepypasta and you know it. OP confirmed for master ruseman.”

“Confirmed. Ya blew it, OP.”

“I believed you up until you posted this.”

“So you put sweetie belle in your butt too?”

Suddenly, my sanity snapped. I knew I was just going to make Pinkie laugh harder, but I didn’t care anymore.

“What did I say? WHAT DID I FREAKING SAY?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! HERE I AM, TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING THAT'S HARD FOR ME TO TALK ABOUT, I SPECIFICALLY ASK YOU TO BE MATURE ABOUT ALL THIS AND YOU THROW THAT CRAP ON ME?! SERIOUSLY?! GROW UP, PEOPLE! Seriously, I'm not in the mood for this. At all.”

“I'm sorry. I just figured since Pinkie haunted you from the earlier anal adventure you took her on, maybe you did the same to Sweetie Belle. I'm just trying to get a better picture of what's going on, M.B.”

“It's fine. I'm just tired of people trying to say that this is all some kind of joke. I knew coming in that this would happen, but for some reason, I told the story anyway. I said in the original post that it would sound stupid and like some kind of joke, but no, there was no Sweetie Belle involved. Maybe Pinkie just knows how to scare me. Sweetie Belle is one of the most innocent, so her going all demented and stuff AND bringing religion into it made me kinda freak out before the hands came. Seriously, though, I wish people would just take this with SOME kind of maturity.”

Of course, they didn’t, though.

“Well, probably the most original ruse I've seen in a long time.”

“My face when OP’s ruse is falling apart.”

“In all seriousness, is there someone here who I can talk to about this? I just wanna talk about it. Is anybody still here that will listen?” That’s all I wanted. I wasn’t looking for help solving how to cure me or how to get rid of these images. I just wanted someone to listen without making me feel like a laughing stock… and I was growing sick and tired of my ears ringing with Pinkie’s laughter.

Luckily, though, there was some good in the world…

“We're still here, M.B.! Turn the lights on if you're feeling skiddish.”

“Sure! I'm all eyes.”

“Hiatus, man. That and some slim hope that you can convince me that the ‘I am God’ thing was just a coincidence. I like spooky things. Is anything spooky happening right now?”

“Religious stuff just freaks me out like that. I mean, I believe in Satan. I don't know how to explain this stuff, but I know that he (or Pinkie) just knows my weak points. Look, I'm just saying what REALLY happened. I know it's cliché. I know about Sonic.exe, but it freaked me out. I promise to you that I'm telling the truth! I don’t know what’s going to happen tonight if anything...”

“What kind of weird crap such as…?”

“Like the dream thing with the hands. I'm seeing her face whether my eyes are open or closed. I hear her giggle at me all the time. I tried apologizing to it yesterday, but she keeps telling me that the party isn't over. My phone's internet stopped working yesterday (for the most part). My phone stopped charging today (for the most part). I'm probably missing a few things, but I just can't think right now.”

“Have you considered this MAY not be a bad thing. I'm being serious, maybe she's slightly deformed/spooky because you defiled her and she's seeking your friendship.”

“I would love being her friend! I love Pinkie Pie! There's nothing I'd rather have! The problem is, though, I don't know what this is. It sure isn't the fluffy pink pony from the cartoon show.”

“Follow scary movie rules: leave the lights on, make sure all the doors are closed, and if you hear a spooky noise, shout at it.”

“If I hear a spooky noise, I'm freakin’ TAPING it.”

“Have you thought of live streaming this?”

“Livestream how? All I have is my phone.” Which was hardly even working.

“M.B., seriously. You should really get something into your stomach. You may feel like crap while eating, but you'll feel better afterwards.  Get light stuff. Water, cereal, just something. Trust me.”

“K, you think just water will help for now? I really can't eat right now.”

“Dehydration is a heck of a thing, dude. That'll at least help you concentrate a little.”

“K, I'm drinkin’ some water. Hopefully it'll help.” I grabbed my water bottle and filled it up in the kitchen sink. When I got back, though, the whole board had gone back to entertaining themselves by making sarcastic comments about everything.

“It seems that the ruse tables have turned for the tide of the other side in OP's ruse.”

“GUISE SRSLY! SRSLY GUYS! STICKING TOYS IN YOUR ANUS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS! DON'T LAUGH!”

“Why am I even still here?”

I would give them 5 minutes to shut up before I shut my computer down and just pretended like this whole night never happened. Unfortunately for me, though, they knew that wouldn’t happen.

“Because it's late and we have no where else to go. Besides at least we're giving you company, M.B.!”

“To entertain us. Besides you can't sleep, remember? (SHE MIGHT GET YOU!)”

“This is starting to become important to me, so I ask that you PLEASE don't leave. There's only, like, 2 crap-posters compared to everyone who wants to help. Anyways, is there a reason you can't eat right now? Could you not stomach anything or is the kitchen only reachable via dark hallways that seem endless?”

“Those posters are really starting to get to me, but yeah, I'll stay. Better than being alone. I have some food in my room. I just feel like I'd throw up if I ate anything.”

“I'm not telling you to stop posting on 4chan, but if you're serious about this whole thing, ponychan would probably have less crap-posters and more people to help you. Although they'd probably crucify you if you mentioned that you shoved a pony up your butt, so maybe it isn't the best idea.”

Actually…

“To be honest, I'm not sure if the toy going up my butt is the reason for all this... I mean, in the first thread, before anyone got quads, there was a line of images, and someone pointed out that the first letter in each one spelled ‘Kill me.’ That's where the creepy stuff really began.”

“’ Freaking A. The one time I open my window it suddenly gets really windy. My Pinkie toy keeps falling off my TV.’”

I didn’t even remember that up until now… “Oh... my... word...”

“I saw the screenshots, but if it isn't shoving the pony up the butt then what is it? Why would you randomly be attacked with hallucinations of Pinkie?”

“How would I know? How would I know why it's done any of this stuff?”

“So the toy itself could be cursed and not the action of the rectal receivage. Do what another anon suggested. Give it to someone else the ring style. Also, any update on any spookiness?”

“I might just trash it. Nothing spooky so far.”

“K̝̳̯̣ͅI͎͇̮̠Ļ̹̱͙̪̳͟͟L̯̪͓̥̰̫ ̵̤M̷̙̱̗͙̫̰͎̖E̡̠.”

After seeing what this anon posted, several people announced that they were leaving the thread, and I was tempted to join them.

“S̢̟͓̲͔͇̙ͅw̨e̡͈̜e̬͙͙̯̗̺e̪͇̫̠̻͉͟e͔͇̭e̡̹̹̼̖e͏e̢̗̭̲̗ͅͅet̹̬̤̥ ͚̣̪͍́d͍͘r̵̖̼̠͔͓̞ȩ̟͎a̻m̺̝̤̮s̵͚̱.”

I was now starting to panic. Just seeing these images, even though they weren't pictures of my toy, was causing me to hyperventilate.

“I'm just trying to be here for advice on what may be a serious situation. There are things you should know that I can fill you in on, but if you're not scared enough by this to accept help, then it's just turning into modern natural selection. Yes, I'm implying you could end up in a six foot hole next to an engraved rock.”

“Heh. Pinkie wouldn't do that. She'd have no one to mess with, and that's assuming she can kill me… Where’s that knife?”

“Ì̵̥̰ņ͏͎̯ ̡̝̻̱̮̩͖́͠y̴̛̙̲͖̩ǫ̸͉͚̗̤̭̥̻u͉͔̣̙͚̕r͏͔͕ ̫̬̹T̯͔̗̥̭͞H̝͓̮̺̗̟̗̺Ṛ͝ͅO̵͎̪̣Ạ̶̡̢̤Ț̴̢͙̲͖̻̳͙͢ͅ!”

Seeing even more people announcing they were leaving the thread, I finally saw that maybe it would be best for me too. Even if I faced her in the real world, I’d still be facing her here. At least this way I’d have a chance of getting some rest. “I… I think I’m going to bed now…”

“N̸̰̼i̟̝̻ģ̣̮̕h̡̫̬͙̱͠t̩͓͉̬͕͜͡y̸͖͞ ̶͕̘̠͠N̠̜͈I̫̤̜͈̲̖̼̘͘̕Ǵ̪̼̲̜̺̻͡H̼͞T̴̞͖̮̘.”

I then laid in my bed and began to cry. Everything was spiraling out of control. I couldn’t let this go on forever. I couldn’t let this go on another night. The amount of stress, fear and anxiety I was going through just wasn’t worth going another day. There was so much that I wanted to live for, so many things that made me happy… but I just couldn’t enjoy anything if I knew she’d be there to keep me company…

I laid on top of my bed, crying… wondering if this was the last time I’d ever get to use it…